Chapter 30

30

I suck in a breath and immediately regret it when I sit up coughing. Shit , my throat is dry. Ugh , did I die? Is this death? Opening my eyes, all I see is darkness. Complete darkness. “ Hello ?” My voice sounds scratchy as if it hasn’t been used in a while.

When a hand suddenly appears out of the dark, I jump with a scream. Pressing a hand to my chest, I try to calm myself when I see it’s Ash . “ Shit ! Ash , you scared me. You’re not supposed to be spooky, spooky! That’s Rev’s job.”

As if summoning the shadow himself, he steps out of the darkness, making me squeak. “ You men are going to kill me with fright.” Okay , maybe … too soon.

“ NO !” Kasim roars from what I assume is the corner of the room.

I cover my ears from the echo of his roar. “ Sorry ! Sorry ! Can someone at least turn the light on, so I’m not frightened every time one of you pops up out of the dark?”

The lights blare overhead, and I squeeze my eyes closed against the brightness. “ Regrets were made,” I whine as try to squint through the light in search of the guys. Six figures are cocooned in black swirls of darkness. Well that explains why I couldn’t see them in the room when the lights were off.

I look down to find that I’m covered in dried blood. There is way more blood covering me than my injury should have allowed. “ Uhm … so… blood.” Well , that was eloquent.

“ Would you like a shower, Snow Bunny ?” Asher’s voice sounds deeper than normal, and I look up to find his eyes consumed in darkness while wisps of black shadows dance across his body.

Oddly the blood doesn’t bother me, it’s the fact that my men are surrounded by darkness. “ Um … no. I’m good. I would like an explanation for the extra blood, though.”

Six hands materialize in front of me, each with a cut running down the center of their palm. “ We paid death’s price,” Ash says from beside me.

My brows furrow until I remember the words from a spell I had read about. I vaguely remember hearing them before I … well, died. I … died. My eyes water as I take in each of my men. My broken villains. Ash’s dark shadows disappear as he takes a seat on the bed beside me.

He grasps my hand, and his eyes flicker to their beautiful blue. “ Don’t … don’t cry, Snow Bunny .”

I choke on my words as I say, “ I’m sorry.”

He shakes his head, scooting closer and lifting a hand to my cheek. His eyes glisten as he whispers, “ Don’t cry… please.”

I suck in a breath, trying to keep my tears from falling, but I fail when I see the others move closer. I can’t hold back the sob that breaks through, and the darkness surrounding the others disappears as they converge on the bed.

Kasim takes my other hand into his and brings it up to rest on his cheek. He nuzzles his face into my palm as his eyes close. “ Don’t cry. Please don’t cry, Princess .”

Rev and Alair take up spots behind Kas to rub up and down one of my legs while Bene and Mir mirror them on the other side.

My vision blurs, the tears refusing to stop. “ I’m sorry… so… so sorry. I never meant to leave you all.”

Ash’s thumb brushes my cheek. “ Shh . Shh . Don’t —” His voice breaks, and he clears his throat and continues, “ Snow bunny, breathe. Breathe for me.”

I tug on Ash and Kas to pull them into a hug. Their heads rest on my shoulders as I chant, “ I love you. I love you. I love you.” I have to say it because the cuts on their palms prove how far they are willing to go for me. How much they love me. I wouldn’t be here if they didn’t.

Ash and Kas each wrap an arm around me and hold me while I sob. Minutes pass as I try to calm myself. Eventually , they both pull back from the hug, and Kas cups my face in his palms. His thumbs caress my wet cheeks as he frowns.

“ No more of that. No more tears, Princess . Ugly crying doesn’t suit you.”

A laugh bubbles out of me as he continues to wipe away my tears. There’s a tilt to his lips when his dark hazel eyes meet mine. I smile through the tears and say, “ You’re so nice to point that out. Thank you.”

His eyes flick over my face before they soften. “ There she is,” he whispers. There’s a shine to them as they meet mine. “ Missed you…”

I surge forward, pressing my lips to his as I slip my fingers into his long hair. It takes a moment for his lips start to moving against mine. The kiss is slow and soft. Something I didn’t expect from him.

His hand slides into my hair, using it to hold me close when I try to pull away. My lips brush against his, and I say, “ Hate you, Grumpy Man .”

“ Hate you more, Princess ,” he replies.

Humming , I pull away with a smile. “ As much as I would love to fight you on that…” I peer down at myself before looking at the others. “ I may need to take a shower. This blood is beginning to itch.”

“ Having her clean may help with Dax as well,” Bene mutters behind Ash .

Mir smacks him. “ Not now, idiot.”

Arching a brow, I look at my men. “ What’s wrong with Dax ?”

Rev sighs as he taps on Kas’s shoulder and says, “ I’ll take her to the shower.”

Crossing my arms, I narrow my eyes. “ I’m not going anywhere until you tell me what is wrong with Dax !”

They share a look before Alair gives in with a sigh and explains, “ He did not handle your death well. He knows that you are alive but seeing you that way...” He shakes his head.

My eyes widen. “ What’s wrong?”

“ We held onto your soul while the healers tried to bring you back. They exhausted almost all their magic before your heart started beating again,” Bene answers.

Kas’s eyes bleed to black as he mutters, “ We could feel each time your soul tried to slip away. Dax took the brunt of the spell since he was the one who cast it. He felt your soul, Princess . Everything you felt, he felt.”

“ Everything ?” I whisper.

He nods, and I try to jump from the bed. “ Then I need to go to him, now!”

Rev catches me the moment I start to fall from getting up too quickly. My brain feels fuzzy and spins from the abrupt movement. “ Slow down, Sunshine . Let’s get you clean first, so he doesn’t think you’re a ghost coming to haunt him.”

He swings me up into his arms, and I sigh in defeat. “ I suppose you’re right. This blood is very uncomfortable.”

He hums as he begins walking to the bathroom. “ Then , let’s get you clean.” He looks over his shoulder and asks, “ Can someone help? I don’t think she will be able to stand on her own.”

Looking over his shoulder, I find Mir and Bene follow while Alair , Kas , and Ash get to work stripping my bed. I hope they burn that bedspread.

I managed to make it down the hall to Dax’s bedroom without much help. I almost tripped a few times, but the others were close behind to catch me. Taking a deep breath, I knock and wait.

There’s no answer, so I try the doorknob only to find no resistance. Pulling it open, I’m greeted with total darkness. My hands shake with nervous energy when I take a step into his room. I’m bombarded by a whirlwind of black, swirling and whipping my hair around.

“ This isn’t safe, Princess ,” Kas says worriedly from the doorway.

I look over at him with a smile. “ I would do it for you. I am the calm within the storm, am I not?”

“ Yes ,” he relents reluctantly.

I give him a nod before turning back to the room. Taking a deep breath, I step deeper into the heart of the storm as I’m consumed by the black abyss. I walk slowly, trying to feel where I am going with my feet, considering I’m completely blind.

“ Dax ? Dax , where are you?” I yell into the deafening wind.

The wind suddenly stops, and I freeze. I look around wildly in search of Dax . I can hear each breath he takes in the deafening silence.

His voice echoes around the room as he calls, “ Little Raven ?”

It’s filled with so much pain and devastation. “ Yes , Dax .” I keep looking around to see if the dark will recede now that he knows I’m here. “ Your little raven is here. Come back to me.”

The shadows eventually start to dissipate, and in their place stands Dax . He’s looking in my direction, his inky eyes filled with so much torment as they flicker between his bright blue irises, then back to black. He’s shivering as the wisps of darkness continue to crawl across his body. His voice breaks when he says, “ Don’t leave me… please… stay…”

I nod and take a step closer. “ Of course. I’m here, Dax . I’m not going anywhere.”

He waits until I am only a breath away from him before he asks, “ Are you real this time, Little Raven ?”

I look up at him in confusion. “ Of course, I’m real.”

His body trembles as he sucks in a breath. “ Every time I try to catch you, you slip through my fingers. You’re suddenly just gone, leaving only feathers behind.”

My eyes sting as I see the fear in his eyes. The fear that if he touches me, he may find I’m only an illusion. I reach up and rest my hand on his cheek. “ Your raven hasn’t left you.”

It takes him a few moments to realize I am touching him. But when he does, he instantly wraps me up in a tight hug. He buries his face in my neck and releases an anguished cry.

He’s holding me so tightly; I fear he may suffocate me. It’s in this moment that I know his obsidian heart has shattered into thousands of pieces. When I was lying dead on battlefield, there was no hope for his dying heart.

I wrap my arms around him, holding him as tightly as my weak muscles allow. His body continues to shake as he mutters, “ My raven. My raven.”

My own tears spill over as I reply, “ Your raven is safe. I’m safe, and I’m here with you.”

He pulls back to look into my eyes. When they meet, I see his are no longer black but a brilliant sky blue. His eyes flick between mine as words rush out of him. “ I love you, Little Raven . If you need to hear those words, I will say them as many times as you want. I will say them as much as you need. Just don’t leave me again.”

I lean forward to softly brush my lips against his. Pulling back, I reply, “ I don’t need words; I already know.” I don’t want an ‘ I love you’ from Dax anyway. I want to hear the same words he said when he first confessed his feelings for me. That I am his obsession. That’s all I ever want to be.

He presses his lips to mine urgently. Stroking his lips against mine before pulling back. “ I need them,” he says breathlessly. “ I need them, Little Raven .”

“ I love you, Dax .”