Chapter 17

17

Ash

A fter I finish up at my internship, I return to the frat, take a quick shower, then head back to my room. I tend to Darwin, Sagan, and Frat Cat before spending more time than usual at my closet. It's a warm spring day, so I can wear a polo or a tee and bring my jacket with me for when it gets cooler tonight.

I grab a tee, then second-guess myself.

Did I pick it because Colin mentioned he liked this shirt on me? Or did I start to like it more once he said that?

I chuckle; I'm being ridiculous.

But I kind of like overthinking going out with Colin tonight.

Between school, parties, and work, we've been so busy, we haven't had a night like this in a while. Just one-on-one time with my Big Man.

Hibachi, ice cream, and a movie is our thing—something we did plenty in high school. Of course, tonight's gonna be different with everything we've done together since the last time we hung out like this.

Before he blew me.

Or fucked and kissed me in front of a guy.

Or suggested fucking me in a bathhouse for people to watch.

And now that he's planted the idea in my head, my imagination has run wild. I thought the live stream was hot, but that sounds epic. Not just being fucked with people watching, but being fucked by Colin with people watching.

I love what we're doing and what we're talking about doing, but I'm curious what a night out looks like with all that's changed between us.

I throw on my shirt and a light jacket before there's a knock on my door.

I suspect it's Colin, so as I open the door, I keep to the side so he won't be able to see the collar of my tee under my jacket.

My stepbrother stands in the hall, smirking as his muscles flex in my favorite shirt of his—a sleeveless navy-blue shirt that hugs that chest and torso, emphasizing those impressive biceps. It's the shirt I've told him to wear when he's trying to impress a girl.

"You dork," I say. "Like I don't know why you wore that."

Colin's smirk spreads into a smile. "What are you wearing?"

"Nothing."

"Perfect. That's what I'd prefer."

I chuckle as I open the door and unzip my jacket so he can get a better view.

Colin's eyes light up, and he checks down the hallway before slipping into my room.

As he steals a kiss, I rest my hands against his cheeks. He squats down and hooks his arms around my thighs, hoisting me in the air like I'm fucking weightless before pushing me up against the wall.

His lips are firm against mine. I didn't realize how much I missed his mouth until it was slammed up against mine again.

Fuck, what his body does to me… It didn't use to be like this at all.

When he touched me, my skin didn't come alive.

I didn't ache with hunger for more licks and kisses.

I didn't think about him taking me out and fucking me in front of strangers.

As Colin pulls away, his gaze shifts to my shirt again. "We're so fucking cheesy."

"You like when we're cheesy."

Colin's gaze wavers. "Well, we didn't specify when we made plans, but considering what we've been doing, is this a da—"

"Don't you fucking say it."

We both know this is date-y, but do we have to say the fucking word?

He's smiling as he opens his mouth like he's about to.

"If you say it, it's definitely not one."

"One what?" His eyebrows tug closer, really bringing the drama in his feigned confusion.

"You know damn well what you were gonna say."

"I don't think I do. Maybe you should tell me."

Why is my face so hot right now? But he's being so fucking adorable, my body can barely handle it.

"You were gonna say the D-word."

"D-word?" Colin says, searching around. "Wait, did you think tonight was a…a date?" He's really hamming up his performance.

And I give him a good tease. "Now I know why you didn't get the lead in that Arthur Miller play senior year."

"Oh, this is so embarrassing. You thought when we said hibachi and ice cream and a movie… Fuck, I never know when I'm sending the wrong signals. I don't know how to break this to you, but I'm just here for the Ash-hole."

I snicker; I can't fucking help myself. I know he's just joking around, and I fucking love it.

"I guess I'm an agent of chaos." Colin moves close, his lips millimeters from mine. "That must be so hard on you to have thought you were gonna get a date with all this and find out all you are is my naughty plaything."

He licks my lips before coming in for a kiss, pressing his weight against me, his tongue teasing mine, desire pulsing through me until I gasp. As I roll my head back, his mouth runs down my jaw to my neck. He makes his way back up until his lips are by my ear. "You think maybe we could just be friends and hang tonight? Then fuck around later? No strings?"

Colin bites at my earlobe, then sucks gently before pulling away, looking so fucking proud of himself for his performance.

I wish I wasn't grinning so hard, but when he's good, he's good. "To be clear," I say, "I know it's kind of a date, but we can agree that's a stupid word, so can we just go out and have fun?"

Colin shakes his head. "You are fixated on me. I feel like I'm leading you on, but maybe if we go out together tonight, I can help you understand that's just not happening. You're not even my type. I like nerdy guys." He studies me. "Brunettes with hazel eyes…who wear glasses."

"Interesting that you just described me to a T, though we both know you prefer blonds."

His gaze settles on my bangs. "I must've been mistaken."

And…he's got me laughing again .

"Don't worry," he goes on. "I'll help you through this, bro."

I don't fight it. "Yeah, I'd really appreciate your help through this, bruh."

"Perfect. Now come on, Ash. You got our table reservations for six thirty, and we don't want to be late for our date ." He really emphasizes the word, which I admit doesn't sound horrible coming from his mouth.

"I fucking give up."

"Figured you would," Colin says before offering another kiss.

And really, though I doubt many people would get it, this might be my favorite way to start a date with Colin.

A sound catches our attention, and I turn to see Frat Cat pawing at his leg.

The meds the vet tech gave us have really helped, and he's been moving about quite a bit.

"You didn't drop the baby off at the sitter's already?" Colin asks.

"The babysitter's down the hall."

His brow rises.

"I was gonna ask Miranda again, but Marty insisted."

"Marty? Really?"

"He's taking to him pretty quickly. Think Frat Cat mellows him out a bit."

"You hear that, Frat Cat?" Colin asks. "We gotta roll to your sitter's."

"You're gonna have to set me down for that."

"Do I?" he asks, carrying me to the door.

"No, I need my wallet!"

Colin backtracks, watching out for Frat Cat as he heads to my desk and grabs my wallet, then heads into the hall, Frat Cat following close behind. Fortunately, we don't have far to go before he finally frees me. Marty's looking at us like we're out of our minds as we're in stitches at his door.

After we walk him through instructions for watching our kitty, Marty says, "You know most cats are pretty independent, right?"

"He's just a baby," I say. "And he likes lots of affection."

"Especially scritches," Colin chimes in, "and if you stop petting him for too long, don't worry, he'll remind you."

Marty rolls his eyes. "You two have the most spoiled cat I've ever met. But don't worry, he's in good hands."

We don't doubt it, so we say goodbye to our precious fur baby before heading out.

We take my car to the hibachi restaurant, where the host seats us at a table with two other couples. We get our usual—Colin, steak, chicken, and shrimp; just chicken for me. As the server grills, he singles out Colin to catch some of the meat and veggies in his mouth. He aims to get Colin to miss a few times, but the guy clearly doesn't know my brother, and unsurprisingly, Colin pulls off some Hail Marys. Once the performance comes to an end, we enjoy our meals, catching up about our day, before Colin heads to the restroom. When he returns, he plops down in his seat, relaxing back the way he does when he's full.

"I warned you to make room for ice cream."

Colin glares at me. "You really think I'm not gonna be able to take down a couple of scoops? Please. I'm gonna be stealing some of yours when you're only halfway through."

That sounds about right.

The host stops by our table and passes out checks; he sets one down in front of me with my debit card sticking out. I slipped it to the host while Colin was in the restroom.

My stepbro glares at me. "Oh, really?" he asks, placing his hand on his chest. "You know I was gonna pay for this."

"Nope. I'm treating my stepbro tonight."

"You sneak," Colin says, his brow creasing. "You've been planning that. Someone's been committing Step Don'ts again."

"I think you'll find that the amendment to Section 1.3 of the Official Step Don't Policy states that exceptions include surprises like birthdays and special events. "

There is no such official document, but we did agree on these things initially when we made our rules because as much as we don't love secrets, we both love surprises.

He's still glaring at me.

"Besides," I add. "I was able to cash in some of those tokens from Manzturbate, so my followers are sort of paying for tonight."

"Your followers? I didn't realize I was dating a celebrity."

I laugh. "It didn't cover the bill, but I figured it'd be funny if our first date was sponsored partly by the money we made the time I showed you the app."

The playfulness in his expression shifts to something more sincere, and he does a double take. "Yeah, I like that."

Mentioning the live streams brings to mind the bathhouse. Getting other people to watch us. It's something that's been buzzing in the background since Colin brought it up. But there's something else there too.

"I've been thinking about that thing you mentioned. A lot."

"Yeah?" Colin asks.

"I do wonder…what if we went and did something like that, but no one wanted to watch? I had the same thought about the app, and that was never an issue, but it crosses my mind."

Colin studies my expression. "I can't imagine anyone not wanting to watch what you do."

I laugh, and I'm fucking blushing again.

"What you looked like when you were streaming or when Dax was there…it's like you're performing. Like you were born to do this. It's captivating, and it'll be just as captivating when you get around even more people. And now that I know what you're worrying about, all I can say is, I can't wait to prove that little nasty voice in your head wrong and let my little perv show everyone who's boss."

My cheeks are still warm now that he's settled my nerves but stimulated my interest even more.

"Thank you for dinner, Ash."

As he takes a kiss, his words really sink in, quieting that annoying voice in my head. And when he pulls away, he says, "But ice cream's on me."

"I mean, future dinners and ice cream, since I'm just an intern. I'd have to make a lot more videos to afford to wine and dine you."

"Well, you'd better get to work."

We share another kiss, then grab our things and head on to the ice cream shop.

"Which do you think tonight?" I ask as the person in line ahead of us finishes up with the clerk. Nearly every time we come here, I get hung up on fudge chunks or peanut-butter cups or both, and we have a bit of a game of Colin guessing which I've decided on .

"Hmmm," Colin says. "Peanut-butter cups."

"Ooh, you don't know me at all."

"Really?" Colin asks, because he's usually on point.

I shake my head. "Can't get it right every time." I approach the clerk, ordering the vanilla scoops and, "Just peanut-butter cups on top."

I sneak a glance to Colin, who glares at me. " Fucking knew it, " he mouths.

This is what I like about being out with him. It's so easy. So fun. We always laugh.

We find a spot near a counter by the front of the shop, and as we settle on some stools, I say, "I like this. I was thinking earlier about all the times we did this in high school. You know, like going to the mall for dinner, ice cream, and movies. Heading around to different stores and just cracking jokes. I remember you were on a roll in a Spencer's with the sex toys, and I was laughing so hard, I thought we were gonna get kicked out or I was gonna pass out because I couldn't get air in."

"We've always had a lot of fun."

"We have. And it's kind of strange, but I keep wondering if this thing we're doing will make anything different. I guess it's been like everything else. Like it's so much the same. You're still my big silly stepbro, and now there's these added perks."

"And you like the perks, don't you?" Colin asks. "Get over here and let me give you some of my mint chocolate."

As I lean toward him, he shoves a spoonful in his mouth, and I pull back, bursting into a laugh.

Yep. Same old Colin, for sure.

We finish the ice cream, hit the movie, then head back to the frat, winding up in Colin's room. He attacks me with another kiss, pushing me up against the wall by his desk, his tongue tasting of the mints we popped after the movie.

When he pulls away, he says, "Well, the baby's got a sitter, so maybe we shower and then snuggle up, watch some Netflix?"

"Is this your sneaky way of trying to keep me here to do naughty things with you?"

"I'm sorry. I assumed you knew I was gonna do naughty things with you before we snuggled. Because as much as I'm eager to fuck you in front of a crowd, tonight you're all fucking mine."

He sounds so fucking greedy for me. I love it.

"Good. Wouldn't have it any other way," I say, and Colin beams.

"I had a really good time tonight. You really know how to date the fuck out of a guy." He winks, feeling so slick for sliding that in.

Hope he looks just as full of himself when he's sliding something else in later.