Chapter 3

The middle month of the summer flew by. Every single day seemed to have tens of things for Elizabeth to learn, with the knowledge that there would be a completely new list the next day. There were issues to be resolved on a near daily basis but Gardiner Import/Export stabilised, the outcome that they all dreamed about. In amongst the hard work there were moments of levity, not least the conversation with Elizabeth’s uncle and cousin about her name, and the concerns of her father. Her uncle understood at once, although it took his son quite a while longer.

“Edward, think of cousin Lizzie having two identities. At home she is Miss Elizabeth Bennet but when she is down at the office or at the warehouse she is Miss Rose Gardiner.”

“So Lizzie is a kind of spy?”

It was nothing like that but if this was what it took for a 13 year old young man to understand then….

“Exactly, that is how you should think of it. Outside the house she is Rose. It is important that you remember that. She is still a cousin but now much more distant. So just call her cousin Rose rather than cousin Lizzie.”

Both Elizabeth and Mr. Gardiner somehow managed not to burst into smiles at the look on young Edward’s face. But it was a much needed moment of (suppressed) laughter.

--

“So how did you spend Christmas, Lizzie?”

It was the middle of January 1808 and Mary Bennet was visiting Gracechurch Street for the first time since the accident the previous summer. She had arrived just after lunch and after freshening up was sitting with her older sister in the parlour.

“It was both quiet and busy.”

“How do you mean?”

“It was quiet in the sense that we do not socialise very much.”

Elizabeth could see that Mary did not understand.

“I am not Uncle Edward’s wife. I run his house for him but it is more complicated than that. His injury is such that he very rarely travels socially. So everyone has to come here. I take the children out, and have escorted Angela and Rebecca to friend’s houses, but again I am the cousin. Maybe as I get a few years older it will start to be more comfortable. But the mothers of the children we visit are at least 10 years older than me, often they are old enough to be my mother. So it is awkward, older than the children but not old enough to have anything in common with the mothers.”

She sighed and fidgeted with her hair.

“The house is running smoothly. The three children still here have a routine, the whole house has a routine, and there is little to cause disruption. Angela has just turned eight but it is too soon to be considering a governess. In two years she will be ten and Rebecca will turn nine in the February. That seems to be the right time for such a move. Until then they have lessons with their nurse, and informal lessons with both their father and myself.”

“That does not sound very quiet Lizzie.”

“That is what I mean by it being busy at the same time. There is not the unnecessary drama and noise of Longbourn but each day seems hectic. I am helping Uncle Gardiner with his business much more than I thought I would. His stumps give him considerable pain and it seems pointless for him to be jostled in the carriage every day. He now only visits his office on a Wednesday, and it often takes him until the end of the week to recover from the pain of that trip.”

“How do you mean?”

“You have read my letters. He suffers pain from the parts of his legs that are no longer there. I think of them as phantom pains.”

“I read that and did not know what to think.”

“It was very odd and I too did not really understand when he first confessed to me. Apparently, it is common with ex- sailors and soldiers who have lost limbs in battle.”

“Really?”

Elizabeth nodded.

“What causes it?”

“Nobody knows for sure. The one that I personally believe is that when uncle’s legs were amputated the ends of the nerves did not heal properly. Or at least completely. When he moves or his stumps are jostled then these nerve endings are pressed. His body is confused and he thinks there is a pain in the missing limb. I do not know for sure but it fits the facts and symptoms. The phantom pains are much worse in his missing left leg than the right one. And the pain is as if a hot poker is being jabbed at his ankle.”

“How odd, and at the same time strangely fascinating. It is terrible that Uncle Gardiner still has to deal with the pain from the accident. Imagine feeling a pain in your ankle and looking down and seeing nothing there.”

“I know. So as a result he does not travel much anymore and I am out and about most days in his stead.”

“How has that been?”

Elizabeth thought about the last four months.

“On the same trip I can feel so many different emotions. It is always rewarding for me, I am helping Uncle Gardiner and his family. Yet at the same time I can be frustrated and annoyed at the attitude I encounter. I do not understand how all men can be so universal in their contempt and disdain for women. Oh they are perfectly polite yet dismissive in the same breath. I am a messenger, a courier, the member of the family entrusted with the documents. But honestly, they treat me like I was Angela, or at least her age. I swear one man attempted to pat me on the head and told me in a condescending and patronising tone that ‘I should not stop at the shops but take these straight to Mr. Gardiner’.”

Elizabeth’s huffy sigh could be heard out in the street. Mary suppressed a smile.

“Lizzie, I have known you too long. Is it really that bad?”

Elizabeth looked her straight in the eye.

“If anything it is worse than I describe. When it comes to business, and especially the tradesmen I deal with, women have no value.”

Mary’s eyes widened at Elizabeth’s serious tone.

“How does Uncle Gardiner treat you?”

An immediate smile came over Elizabeth’s face.

“It is the counter to my annoyance at everyone I meet outside. Uncle Gardiner treats me very well. Maybe the best thing I can say is that he treats me as if I am a man. He has been teaching me constantly. I have a head for numbers, they do not scare me and I understand what they are saying, so that is a both a great help and a benefit in understanding the business. Where he has been hugely supportive is in all the other aspects of business; dealing with people, both pleasant and not so pleasant; explaining about finding the perfect balance of quality and cost, and how to maximise the price he sells at; thinking about the world, where do the goods come from, is a shortage of supply going to increase prices, is a glut going to cause them to plummet; and perhaps most of all reading people. That last one is nothing but part of dealing with people.”

“So he is treating you as an equal?”

“Oh no, I am nothing like his equal. The best way to describe me is as a family apprentice. In some ways I am getting him ready to teach young Edward once he finishes school.”

“I see that, and it is a good way to describe it. But he listens to you?”

“Yes, he does. Like I said he takes the time to answer my questions, especially my favourite, ‘why?’.”

Mary giggled, knowing that Elizabeth had driven both their parents mad with that exact question when she was a child.

“I know, you would have thought I would have grown out of it.”

“Have you had many dealing with uncle’s customers or just with people at the warehouse?”

“I have not dealt with any customers. At least not directly. I have heard several of them dealing with the clerks or with uncle on a Wednesday. I have cleared a space for a small desk in the room that is adjacent to uncle’s office. There is a high window between the two rooms and it is always open, so I can listen to the conversations. It is often the basis for lots of my questions that evening.”

Mary looked pensive.

“Are you engaging in trade Lizzie?”

“No Mary, we are careful about that. I do not want to harm my own reputation, or those of you or my other sisters. When I am down at the warehouse or office I am known as Rose Gardiner, a distant cousin of Mr. Gardiner. The age difference allows people to accept that I use the honorific of uncle with him.”

“You have two names?”

Elizabeth smiled.

“Yes. It was the only thing that Papa asked of me, Uncle Gardiner understood and so yes. Here in the house and when I am out with the children I am Miss Elizabeth Bennet but when I am helping uncle then I am Rose Gardiner. It is one of the things that annoys me. I have seen the sneers and heard the derision for those with the stench of trade.”

She shrugged although her face was grim.

“Enough of life here in London, how is life back in Meryton? Tell me all the things that you and Jane have not put in your letters.”

“In so many ways Meryton is unchanged. The seasons dictate the rhythm of the community. The general consensus is that it was a good year, the harvest was one of the best in recent memory, so that colours everything. There is that nice feeling of plenty in the air.”

Elizabeth indicated the ledgers that Mary had brought from Longbourn.

“I will go through these and see how Longbourn did. The Michaelmas quarter was not that different to the year before. I presume Papa has not stirred himself to take a more active role on the estate.”

Mary’s expression was torn between disapproval at Elizabeth for the harsh critique of their father and chagrin at the truth of the statement. She just shook her head.

“How is Mama?”

“In most ways she is unchanged, still endlessly fretting about the entail. I am 15 in March and I worry that she will insist on my coming out at the first Assembly after my birthday. She had Jane out when she was 15. Come to think of it, how did you manage to avoid it for a year? It was supposed to be your turn at the Michaelmas Assembly.”

Elizabeth smirked.

“I told her it was important for Jane to be the centre of attention. I asked for an extra year so that Jane could continue to shine. Neither Jane or I particularly cared but I did not want to be paraded around. It felt I was a prize cow being shown to all the prospective buyers. I was resigned to coming out at the end of the summer but then the accident happened. I am sorry Mary, but I do not know if you will be able to use the same excuse.”

“I understand. I hope to delay until I am at least 16, here in town it is normally 18, but I know that I am not that lucky. Anyway, the thing I did want to mention is Mama still goes on about the entail and us all marrying well, but she will often stop and. I do not know what the right way to finish that sentence is. She will stop and, well she does not calm down, but she will mutter something under her breath. I am not positive but I think she says ‘family’. Which is her way of thinking about you, and her brother.”

Elizabeth looked surprised but then turned thoughtful.

“Interesting. She sent one long letter before she visited with Papa, where she repeated everything in the letter. But that was back at the start of September. Since then she has only sent me two short letters and they have been, as you said, more calm than normal. She is right to be worried about the entail, I just wish she would not push it all down onto our shoulders.”

Their discussion was interrupted by the arrival of their three young cousins and the rest of the afternoon was spent being entertained by them.

The visits from her sister over the course of the year were incorporated into the routine of the house. Elizabeth’s uncle insisted that she and whichever sister was visiting act like the gentle-born ladies they were. For seven days out of the two week visit they ventured into the more fashionable parts of London. During Mary’s three visits their trips were more academic and educational; museums, galleries and bookshops. This suited the temperament of both young women. During Jane’s single visit in the October there was more shopping and a trip to the theatre. They joined the party of one of Mr. Gardiner’s acquaintances and although Jane attracted many glances they were able to enjoy the play without being importuned. These four separate weeks of pleasure were important to Elizabeth as it reminded her that there was more to life than just managing the house, and assisting her uncle.

--

1808 had an extra day being a leap year, but even that did not stop the year from seeming to be over in the blink of an eye. Birthdays came and went; anniversaries, including that most painful one in July; school holidays for young Edward; and suddenly Christmas was passed and Mary was visiting again. Jane had visited in October whilst Mary had visited in April and July after her January trip. Although Mary was to stay for the full two week visit Jane accompanied her for the first weekend as she missed her sister.

“Jane, you are here as well. It is wonderful to see you both.”

Hugs were exchanged before they were led up to their room. Soon they were back in the parlour and Elizabeth poured tea for all three of them.

“I am surprised Mama let you both come, are you here for the whole two weeks?”

“No Lizzie, I am only here for the weekend, I shall return on Monday whilst Mary is here for the full two weeks. I just wanted to see you, Christmas is not the same without you at Longbourn.”

It was impossible to hug as they were all holding fresh hot tea but Elizabeth beamed at her older sister.

“I know what you mean. Although with the younger children there is lots of Christmas joy. How is everyone at Longbourn?”

Elizabeth had been absent for 18 months but she still wanted to know the goings-on in the area. Mary indicated that Jane should talk first.

“The neighbourhood is unchanged since you left, all bar the fact that the Uptons vacated Netherfield Park in the spring. They have moved to Bath for the waters and the estate has not yet been leased. This year’s harvest was good, not as bountiful as last year, but still sufficient so that no one will starve. There have been several marriages and births in Meryton but you will know all that from Aunt Philips’ letters. Charlotte Lucas is attempting to convince Lady Lucas to let her visit you. The regular correspondence between the two of you is no substitute for actually sitting and talking with you, like Mary and I are doing right now. But Lady Lucas is insisting that Charlotte is needed at home. She is disappointed but is resigned to it. I do not know why Lady Lucas thinks she cannot cope for a week without Charlotte. If she ever marries then she will have to cope without her completely.”

This was as close to condemnation as Jane could manage.

“What I have not dared write in a letter in case Mama finds out, is that I received an offer of marriage.”

“Really! You have been here nearly two hours and you are only telling me now! Jane Bennet, priorities!”

All three of them laughed.

“I turned him down, Papa supported me, and Mama thinks that he left the area without making me an offer.”

“Who was he?”

“A widower with a small estate outside Luton. The problem was that he was older than Papa, quite a few years older, and wanted a young wife. He was never unpleasant in either word or deed but his gaze made me feel uncomfortable. So there is my latest news. The young man that caught my eye in the spring left with nary a backwards glance while the old man in the autumn made me an offer. So here I am, soon to be 20 years old, and still single.”

“How is Mama with all of this?”

“She is not an unkind woman but sometimes she is unkind without realising it. I worry that the phrase ‘she cannot be so pretty for nothing’ will be inscribed on my tombstone. Enough of my complaints. Mary came out at the June Assembly and danced all but one dance. You know this from our letters and visits. But the war with Napoleon and the French means that there are fewer young men and it was noticeable at both the Michaelmas and Christmas Assemblies. All the young ladies agreed to sit out at least one dance just so there was at least a semblance of balance.”

“What of our younger sisters?”

Jane looked down and Mary took up the tale.

“They are in much need of parental guidance. Angela at nine and Rebecca at nearly eight are both better behaved and more refined than both Kitty at 13 and Lydia at 12. It is a reflection on you, and a good one, that our cousins continue to be so well-mannered. Mama spoils Lydia, and Kitty in turn follows Lydia’s lead, if for no other reason than to get some attention from one of her parents. I am ignored and Jane is fussed over by Mama. Again, as Jane said about the neighbourhood, it is no different than when you were living at Longbourn.”

“And Papa?”

They all could tell Elizabeth knew, and at the same time dreaded, the answer.

“Ever more remote.”

Even Mary paused before carrying on.

“I do not think he knows that you explain the ledgers to me and through me to Jane. We know that the estate is slowly atrophying. I am not 16 for another two months but it is Jane and I that perform all the tenant visits. Mama is not interested and Papa does not seem to care. It is difficult to watch when we see how hard you and Uncle Gardiner are working.”

Jane could not even talk about it, and Elizabeth could see that even admitting this much was making Mary uncomfortable, so by unspoken agreement they dropped the subject.

“Enough of Hertfordshire, tell us about life here in London.”

“It is no different than I have talked about before during your visits or I have detailed in my letters. My biggest struggle is in dealing with people, especially men. Most women do not have to deal with men while they are working, rather it is at social occasions or at church. Since I am the legs, ears and eyes of Uncle Gardiner I have more dealings with men. Not that they would consider dealing with me, rather I am around them more. Fortunately Uncle Gardiner has endless patience and I have learned so much while sitting with him. So this tempers my frustration but it still irks me.”

Elizabeth smiled as she thought about all that she had learned in the last year. But also what she would share with her sisters.

“The four visits from the two of you have been incredibly important. They remind me to take a break, and that I am gentle-born. I am Miss Elizabeth Bennet when I am out with the children and when I am acting as hostess for Uncle Gardiner, but I find that being busy the whole time goes against that.”

“I do not understand Lizzie, what do you mean?”

“I find that I am very busy six days of the week, and sometimes on the Sabbath as well. I know that I do not have as hard a life as the servants but I work as long hours as they do.”

“Really?”

“Yes, although it mostly my own fault. I am learning how to run a household, with instruction and assistance from both Mrs. Brewer the housekeeper and Cook as well. I talk to Mrs. Brewer every day and to Cook most mornings. After more than a year I feel more confident of being the Mistress of a house such as this. I do not mean to brag but does Mama go through everything with you Jane?”

Her older sister furrowed her brow as she thought about the question.

“She has taught me, well as I was going to say most things but I am no longer sure. You know Mama has a deserved reputation for setting a good table, so most of my instruction has been around entertaining. We have gone through the various aspects needed to ensure a good evening but there has been less instruction on the day-to-day tasks. Most of those I have picked up from quiet discussions with Mrs. Hill and with the Cook. What else have you learned Lizzie?”

“The three main things I had not considered before, or at least consciously, were a cleaning schedule, dealing with the stables and settling staff pay.”

“Are the not the stables the responsibility of our uncle.”

Mary had her hand to her mouth almost before she had finished.

“Exactly. Normally that would be so, but in this case, I am the one who goes out and inspects the coach, talks to the coachman and the groom and deals with the expenses of maintaining the mews.”

“Was it difficult to learn?”

“I think if the coachman had been surly or awkward then it would have been. Fortunately he understood why I was fulfilling the role and was very helpful. He encouraged me to ask questions, and even told me the things that uncle would have checked upon. Uncle will talk to him occasionally on his Wednesday trip to his office but he has not visited the mews since the accident.”

“I know that Longbourn has a cleaning schedule but I have not discussed this with either Mama or Mrs. Hill. Does it not take care of itself, overseen by Mrs. Brewer?”

“I am sure that it could be, but Mrs. Brewer is explaining to me the different cycles, things that are cleaned weekly or monthly, versus items or rooms that are only cleaned quarterly or even annually. The most poignant one is the master suite. It has been unused since the accident as Uncle Edward now sleeps on the ground floor. Over the course of the year the master suite has stopped being cleaned weekly and everything is now covered in sheets and is only given a light dusting quarterly and will not be cleaned until the spring. There was nothing that was a great surprise but instead it was lots of little things which built my understanding and therefore my confidence.”

“And the pay?”

“I deal with more of the staff than Uncle Gardiner. He had a rough idea of how everyone had done but he wanted me, as effectively the Mistress of the house, to review everything with him. I only changed one person’s pay but again it was another learning experience. When I stop and think about it, the last 18 months have been a constant learning experience. Which ties back to my being constantly busy. The fault is my own, you know what I am like, I love to learn new things. Women in our society lead such circumscribed lives that I take every opportunity presented to me. Even if it leaves me exhausted every evening when I retire to bed.”

Mary and Jane looked at each other with worried expressions.

“Are you pushing yourself too hard Lizzie?”

Elizabeth scoffed at them.

“No! I am not yet 18, I am young and healthy, I am fine.”

Mary looked at Jane. The oldest sister was going to ask the harder questions.

“Do you ever think you will return to Longbourn?”

Elizabeth nodded at the question, it had been the topic of much of her own thoughts.

“I do not know. Uncle Gardiner is well, and has a routine that does not tax his body. Young Edward will be 15 in March and still has two and a half years of school ahead of him. The other three children are still not yet 10 years of age. I am needed here and I do not foresee how that will change until Edward finishes his schooling, at the earliest.”

Jane saw Mary’s lips moving as she added up the years.

“That will be four years since the accident. What of you Lizzie?”

“What of me. I think, deep down, I knew this would be the outcome back when we first got the dreadful news. Family helps family.”

While there was much more to be talked about, at the same time nothing else needed to be said.

Family came first.

Later that evening, in the room they shared, Jane and Mary sat in bed and chatted.

“Is Lizzie trying to do too much Mary? She claimed that she was not but I am not so sure. Let us go through everything that she has talked about and several that she did not. The house is immaculate and clearly well run. Lizzie respects Mrs. Brewer yet it is clear that Mrs. Brewer in turn respects Lizzie. She is not Uncle Gardiner’s wife, just his young niece assisting him and his family, yet there is no tension there. And that is not just from this trip but all our trips, do you agree?”

“I think it goes back to our central issue of working hard. Elizabeth is not sitting back and ordering Mrs. Brewer around. She is working as hard as her and it is easy to gain respect when that happens.”

Jane nodded in agreement.

“Although it pains me to admit this, Angela, Rebecca and Michael are much better behaved than either Kitty or Lydia. They are lively and enthusiastic, Michael is only five after all, but they are not.”

Jane did not finish the sentence and instead just sighed.

“I know what you mean. There is no need to append any one of half a dozen different words. They will all mean the same thing.”

“And it is not as if there is just one child who is well behaved. There are three of them including two girls barely a year apart, no different than Kitty and Lydia.”

“Before you go on Jane, think about these two things. Elizabeth is not 18 until the start of summer and she is presiding over a well-run house and has helped raise three well behaved children. There are ladies more than double her age who cannot say the same thing.”

“Yet she hardly gets the chance to be such a lady. I know that she still reads and walks when she can, but she does not take advantage of living in the largest city in the world. She only visits the more fashionable areas of the city when we come to town.”

“I think that part of her challenge is she has no one to accompany her when we are not here. Yes, she will have a maid and footman with her but where is the joy if you feel isolated? She is not even of an age where she would be out in London.”

“Her being here in London at such a young age, and with so much responsibility is through an odd, and tragic, circumstance. I just worry about her Mary. It seems that she has so much to do.”

“Why do we not compare it to our own lives Jane? Visits to our tenants take two days a week for both of us now. There is a day in Meryton, visiting the shops and the Philips. I am in the stillroom at least one day a week, and you are often there with me. You attend Mama and are still the only one that can calm her.”

Mary stopped and it was her turn to sigh.

“Lizzie does not have to deal with our parents. She can do the things that Papa would neglect and she does not have to deal with Mama’s nerves and can just get on with running the house.”

That Jane, the most loyal and forgiving of the Bennet sisters, said nothing was telling. The both knew it was correct. Elizabeth was setting her own path and seemed to be coping fine without interference from their parents. As the candle was blown out both young women were silent with their thoughts.