Chapter 20

20

Massimo

Liar. What a fucking liar I am.

And what else could I say? Of course, I'm over her. I have to be; I'm getting married to her sister. This is the only way forward. I allowed myself to feel for her. In my entire life, I never made a spontaneous decision, except with her, and where did that get me? She sent me packing, for another man. A man she's still in love with. She was never mine. She always belonged to another. It's time to accept that and move on.

I transfer the chain with the horseshoe pendant from my shirt to the pocket of my pants, then wipe down my shoes. After a quick wash, I change into the clothes Adrian brought me.

When I re-enter the conservatory, the group turns to watch me approach. My younger brother, Seb and his wife Elsa, have their arms around each other. My other brother, Axel, leans against a windowsill, his wife Theresa pressed into his side. Christian and his wife Aurora, who is also the doctor for the Cosa Nostra, are talking in low tones to each other, and the newlyweds Luca and Jeanne? They're holding hands and gazing at each other with a nauseatingly 'in love' look on their faces.

These are the Sovrano Seven? The men who run the Cosa Nostra and who are feared for their violent pasts? The fuck happened to us? Falling in love and finding women turned us into pussy-whipped motherfuckers.

On the other side of the room, I sense the Camorra watching me with as much interest. My fiancée-to-be is seated in a chair on the far end. She looks like she wants to approach me, but knowing how the Mafia ingrain correct protocol into their women, she probably won't. Thank fuck for that. I have to face Via, no doubt, just not yet.

Michael, my oldest brother and the Don of the Cosa Nostra, stands next to a seated woman. His wife, Karma, has her hands over her belly. She's nearly three months along and beginning to show. Michael grips the chair behind her head, his stance protective. They both watch me as I close the distance between us.

"You okay?" Karma asks softly.

"I will be." I tilt my head.

"You don't have to do this, or at the very least, we can push back the engagement a few more days to give you some time."

Next to her, Michael shifts his feet. He and I both know it sends the wrong message to the Camorra if we ask for more time. Between Mafia clans, honor is everything, and saving face is why we do most things. To bring both families together, only to push things back, would be taken as an insult. It would escalate the tension between us and leave us vulnerable to possible attacks.

"It's too late." I widen my stance. "My mind is made up."

"She's right, though." Michael scans my features. "Better to call off the engagement if you're unsure, than to take it all the way to the altar, only to find you can't go through with the wedding."

"That won't happen." I set my jaw. "I want this marriage."

"Didn't seem that way when you rushed out earlier, dragging her sister along."

"I didn't know they were related. Had no idea she was part of the Camorra ." I thrust my hand in my pocket.

"Where did you meet her?" Karma asks.

"At a bar."

"And you knew she was the one?"

I lower my chin to my chest. "She's in love with someone else."

"Ah." Karma's expression grows sympathetic. The heaviness in my chest intensifies. Fuck, will it ever get easier to say that? Will it ever be possible to think about her without my stomach folding in on itself?

"That's too bad, I was going to suggest you simply marry her instead," Karma murmurs.

Michael and I train our gazes on her.

"What?" She looks between us. "She's Camorra; you're Cosa Nostra . If you marry her, there's an alliance between the two clans."

"I'm supposed to get engaged to her sister."

"Things change." She raises her shoulder.

"She's in love with someone else."

"Are you sure?" She purses her lips. "What if she told you that simply because she was upset with you?"

I scowl. "I was there. I didn't imagine it when she told me in no uncertain terms that she wasn't in love with me."

"You're not in love with your wife to-be," she points out.

"It's an arranged marriage."

She raises a shoulder. "So, make this one, too."

I stare at her. It can't be that simple, can it?

"What are you getting at?" I finally force the words out.

"Ask her to marry you."

"I already did," I point out.

"Ask her again."

I straighten to my full height. "No. She's made up her mind, and so have I."

"Are you sure?" Michael rocks back on his heels. "This is your last chance to back out if you have any doubts."

I hold up my hand. "I don't. I'm going through with this."

He holds my gaze for a beat, another, then nods. "So be it."

A ripple runs through the assembled crowd, and I know she's entered the room. I resist the urge to turn. I hear her footsteps on the tiled floor as she passes me and heads for the front of the room. I can't resist peeking from the corner of my eyes as she walks over to her sister. Olivia sits down next to her and the two embrace before they speak in low voices.

I wrench my gaze away from her, and turn to Michael. "I'm ready."