CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

My heart was running rampant in my chest as I waited for Thoran. It knocked against my ribs and vibrated through my bones. I could feel it beating between my ears.

Between my legs.

The thrum there was a maddening pulse begging for his attention and it was all I could do to keep from touching it myself. I even intentionally left my panties off. I wanted nothing between me and him when he took the dress off.

A bundle of raw nerves and excitement, I was practically humming by the time he knocked.

Bracing, I took a deep breath and opened the door.

Thoran froze.

His eyes darkened as they moved over me. Down me. Stopping briefly on my breasts barely held in place by fabric before drifting up to my lips.

"Where do you think you're going dressed like that, sweetheart?"

I wished I could say your bed, hopefully. But I was nowhere near that bold. So, I could only stand there and let him undress me with his eyes.

"Christ, you're beautiful."

Bolting down my courage, I braved the single step between us. Bringing myself directly into the lion's path. Right under the chin he had to lower to meet my gaze. His arm did the rest. It hooked my middle and drew me in the rest of the way.

"I have every intention of taking that off you be the end of the night. Everything except the lipstick and the heels. You're going to need those for when I bend you over and fuck you from behind."

My mouth was a dry cave of so many things I wish I could say and could only manage weakly, "And the lipstick?"

Thoran smirked. "I want it smeared across my cock after you clean both our cum off him."

The visual sent a hot slash of what I was beginning to recognize as arousal through me. It seared and crippled. It made the place between my thighs throb with such violent ferocity, I gasped. My fingers tightened in his shirt when I felt something wet roll down the insides of my thighs.

"Thoran," I panted.

The humor vanished from his face. Replaced with a hard grinding to his jaw and a dark, predatory sneer to his lips.

"Take off your panties," he ordered.

My cheeks flamed even as I whispered, "I'm not wearing any."

His sharp inhale nearly destroyed me. Nearly as much as the hands that came up and closed around my throat. Something cold came up against my back, but all I knew was the hand that released my neck and dropped to the slit up my right leg.

"Open your fucking legs, Blue. Show me how fucking wet you are." But the moment he cupped my heat. The moment his fingers were practically sucked into the fever of my body, he laughed as I lost my mind. The sound was anything but amused. It was hard and slightly unhinged. "Fuck, baby, you're dripping. Your cunt is leaking..." he drove deeper, sending my body into a spasm when he plunged a third finger.

"Too much!" I sobbed.

He cackled into the side of my face. "Are you sure? Then why are you about to cum?"

I was, I realized as the first wave crashed over me. I may have moaned his name. I may have screamed it. It was all an explosion of stars and clanging bells that went on forever before I could find the ground again.

"There she is." Thoran chuckled into my ear. "I barely even touched you."

Still floating in the warm cocoon of my release, I couldn't even find the sense to be embarrassed.

"That wasn't supposed to happen."

Thoran raised an eyebrow. "I'm fairly certain it was."

Chuckling weakly, I shook my head. "I was saving it for later."

Thoran bent his dark head and started a path down the side of my neck. "Is that right? What for?"

His finger hooked into the strap of my dress.

"I was ... I was..."

I couldn't string together a single thought when his head was over the breast he'd exposed. The hand I'd shattered on moments before was still buried inside me. Still pumping. Still grinding into my clit.

"Wait..." I groaned, feeling the edges of the cliff coming at me fast. "Thoran ... please..."

His mouth closed into my nipple. My fingers flew to the back of his head, possibly to stop him, but my fingers had buried themselves into his hair.

"I'm not doing anything, sweetheart. You're the one fucking my fingers."

He was right, of course. He wasn't moving at all anymore. I was driving myself on him. Impaling myself again and again.

I made a sound between a sob and a moan.

He dragged down the other strap and claimed the other breast. The wet sounds my body was making would have horrified me if I could function to care.

"Cum, baby. Cum so I can clean your dripping cunt before we go down to eat dinner with the others, your pussy on my breath."

"Oh God!"

I came with a shuddering exhale. I'd barely stopped when he was on his knees. My leg was hooked over his shoulder and his face was between my slick thighs.

His tongue was thorough.

It licked every fold and replaced his fingers inside my channel. He sucked on my lips. My clit. Sucked until my hands were in his hair and his fingers were filling me once more and I was pressing into his face and wheezing.

He lapped that release, too.

By the time he was satisfied he'd gotten all he could from me, I could barely stand. He smirked when I tried to walk and nearly killed myself on my heels.

"I should change," I babbled incoherently, and Thoran laughed.

"Oh, you're not changing, sweetheart. You wore that to get me hot. Well, I'm hot, baby. My cock is so fucking hard, it's going to rip your greedy little hole in two."

A thick trickled expelled from my body and hit the inside of my knees. I squeezed my thighs together but it was no use.

"You knew?" I panted, unable to believe I was throbbing again after cumming four times already. But if he touched me even once, I knew I'd break again.

"That you were a horny little demon desperate for my dick?" He smirked and pinched my nipple through the front of my dress, making me gasp. "Oh, I knew." He took my hand and peered down at it. "Where's the wrapping?"

"I took them off. They're not bleeding anymore."

"Keep them on. You could get an infection."

I had to rely heavily on Thoran as he helped me down the stairs. My knees were still trembling, and I couldn't fully feel my feet. He seemed to find a world of humor in my distress.

There were two guards just inside the doorway when we reached the foyer. Both promptly dropped their gazes when we arrived. For a horrific moment, I realized they must have heard us. Well, me. Thoran had been holding me against the open door frame as he destroyed me, and sound traveled.

"Do you think they heard us?" I hissed just for Thoran's ears.

He barely acknowledged the pair when he answered simply, "Not if they know what's good for them."

I wasn't given the chance to press when we arrived at the dining room. Oliver and Vance were the only two in attendance.

Oliver beamed and rose. "Miss Smith, looking as lovely as ever."

I smiled at him as Thoran helped me into my seat. "Thank you."

Oliver regained his seat. "I heard you visited the village today. How did you like it?"

"I loved it," I said, meaning it with my whole heart.

We fell into an easy conversation about the different shops and the people. He suggested several places I should see the next time I went, and I promised I would.

"Abby loved the village," he said after a lull where Cooke served steaming plates of roast and potatoes with tiny carrots. "She would go every morning before the sun even came up. She loved watching the sunrise from that fountain in the courtyard. I feel her there sometimes when I sit and watch people go by."

"Were you two close?" I asked when Oliver trailed off.

"She was my best friend."

A sad, wistfulness crossed his round face, and I didn't press anymore.

I couldn't imagine losing Malcolm. I supposed, in a way, I had, but he was still alive and, one day, I would see him again and that was the hope I would keep with me.

"You did what?" The hard snarl in Thoran's voice startled me to the present and the tension I'd missed between him and Vance.

"We don't exactly have an abundance of time, Thoran," Vance was saying. "The sooner we secure this opportunity, the sooner we can resume our lives. Unless you've decided to let Ronin have everything."

"It should have been discussed with me before you made that call," Thoran shot back. The fury wafting off him curdled the single nibble of roast I'd taken.

"We did discuss it, remember?" Vance retorted.

"And I said I would think about it." Thoran turned on Oliver. "Call them back—"

"No." it wasn't fear in Oliver's kind face but pity. Comfort. "I'm sorry, Thoran, but this has to be done."

Live fire burned in Thoran's face. A vicious and molten crackle of fury that whitened the peaks of his knuckles clenched on the table on either side of his plate. His golden eyes shot between the two men watching him back, but it was the third man I hadn't seen slip into the room that he spoke to.

"Cyrus, take Blue to the office." The coiling inferno was still there when his focus rested on me, but brutally controlled. He took my hand and brought it to his lips. "I'll be there in a moment, love. Go with Cyrus."

The guard appeared at my shoulder. Wordlessly, he gathered up my plate, cutlery and wine glass, and stepped back. Thoran rose to pull my chair out and help me to my feet. He gave my fingers a gentle squeeze of comfort.

With my insides a writhing mess, I turned and followed Cyrus from the room, but not before Thoran's thundering roar tore through the delicate strain.

"Are you out of your fucking minds?"

The rest of his rage faded with the distance. The snap of my heels sounded infinite in the brittle silence. I attempted to break it, but couldn't think of a single thing to say.

We arrived all too quickly and Cyrus set my things up on Thoran's desk. He said nothing even as he moved to stand in the open doorway with his back to me.

"You don't have to stay," I told him, knowing he probably should be with Vance and Oliver to keep Thoran from killing them.

"I'm fine here. Thank you."

I didn't push.

His presence was almost soothing as I scooted closer to my plate and started eating. I watched the darkness outside. The smudged blur of wilderness was barely noticeable in the far distance. There was no sign of the gardens from Thoran's office or his bedroom. I still didn't have my bearings, but I guessed it was further towards the other side of the house.

I finished my supper. I cleaned the whole plate. Not wanting to give Thoran any more reason to be angry.

I was working on my wine when a card caught my eye. It lay on a pile of folders, partially askew as if tossed there carelessly. The familiar lace edging and crisp, dark design had me reaching for it even though part of me already knew what it was.

Mother had made me write out the names of every person she wanted invited to the wedding. I had spent hours scrolling with clean, precise loops with Mother looming over my shoulder, watching for even the tiniest deformity. My hand and back had throbbed for days afterwards. My fingers had become claws I couldn't unfurl.

But it was my thighs that had taken the worst of the punishment. Mother's method to keep me focused, keep my hand steady was a leather crop that made a smart crack against skin when she was displeased. Even through the thin fabric of my dress, it had left red, angry welts.

I shook out of the nightmare and stared at the weighted invitation with my name prominently next to Jarrett's.

A cold, slimy feeling crawled into my stomach as I traced the curves and edges of the name I'd given Thoran in a moment of weakness not two hours ago just in that room while this was on his desk.

Did he know?

Had he put the pieces together?

Did he not care?

I didn't understand, but I shot a glance towards Cyrus still in the doorway, hands clasped at his back, giving me all the privacy he could and gingerly slipped the invitation into the trash with the other discarded scraps of paper someone would empty in the morning. I moved a few crumpled pieces on top to cover it completely before sitting back.

It won't matter, I thought to myself. That was the proof that Thoran knew Jarrett well enough to get invited to the wedding. They were friends. Eventually, Jarrett would visit, and I would be there like some trophy for Thoran to just hand over.

But Thoran wouldn't. I knew it as certainly as I knew Jarrett was a bastard, that Thoran would never. Still, those tiny thorns of doubt cut at me.

As if summoned by the sheer power of my crumbling sanity, the man controlling my every heartbeat stalked into the room. Golden eyes on me the moment he rounded the door.

"Leave," he told Cyrus without a pause.

Cyrus did, shutting the door behind him.

I shot to my feet. "I finished everything," I said, gesturing to the empty plate. "Cyrus saw me—"

Hard arms closed around my waist in a desperate embrace that practically lifted me up off the floor. The side of my neck was filled by his face. He crushed me into his chest with such need I gasped.

"Thoran?"

His hold tightened. "Just a moment, Blue."

My heart clapped at the torn shreds of my pet name soaking into the hammering pulse at my neck. My arms rose and encircled his shoulders. My fingers wove into his hair. Every fear I'd had clawing around inside me seconds before vanished as if they never existed.

"What is it?" I whispered into the side of his neck. "What's wrong?"

"Need you, baby. Just fucking need you."

I pressed him closer when he trailed off. "I'm here."

His shoulders jerked with the sound that left his chest. A sound of cold amusement and frustration. It reflected in his eyes when he raised his head to peer down at me.

"Did I hurt you?"

I shook my head, hands reaching to cup his face. "No, but what's wrong?"

His hesitation cut through pieces of my sanity as I waited. But rather than say, he pressed a kiss to my brow. Took my hand and led me to the chair I'd just evacuated. I was pulled into his lap. His thighs were hard muscles under my backside.

I instinctively leaned into him. My arms finding their place around his shoulders. His found their way around my waist. Across my back to my shoulders. His lips grazed mine.

"Fuck, baby, I'm so tired."

I pressed him to me when he rested his brow to my chest. My fingers stroked his hair.

"Whatever it is, I know you'll figure it out."

After a long moment of silence, Thoran drew back and rested his head against the chair. His half-hooded eyes settled on my face

"I didn't tell you everything, love. But I need you to hear it all before you say anything, okay?"

Despite the warning, despite steeling myself for whatever he was trying to ease me into, my stomach whined. The roast and carrots threatened to rebel. I could feel them turning into rocks in my belly. My heart thumped and I hoped he couldn't hear it.

"Okay," I said, assuring us both that I was ready.

"Before my father died, he and my uncle had an agreement that I would take his place as the eldest. The house. The fortune. The legacy. The business. That's how it always worked. The eldest got everything." He skimmed his palm up my thigh to my hip. The warmth of his skin burned through the fabric of my skirt. "My cousin Ronin is an idiot. Reckless, power hungry, and a gambling addict. He lost everything his parents left him in under a year. I tried to help him in the beginning. I paid off loan sharks and his debts until I realized he wasn't going to stop and if I kept bailing him out, he'd never learn. So, I offered to get him therapy. I booked him into rehab and a hundred different programs, and he refused to go. He's cold and bitter that I refuse to help him anymore, and recently, he became aware of the clause." He shook his head slightly. "It wasn't a secret. I guess he just didn't hear that part during the reading, but..." he furrowed his brows and looked down at where his hand was on my hip. "My father added in his will that I needed to be married before my thirty-fifth birthday."

"Oh!" I said, finally understanding what Jeannette meant by a new bride every year. Thoran was trying to uphold his end of the will, but the women kept dying. "How much time do you have?"

Thoran made a small chuckle. "None. My birthday's in two weeks."

I felt myself tense. "What are you going to do?"

Thoran shrugged. "I can give up everything my grandfather worked towards. My life. My future. My business. Or..." Hard chips of amber settled on my face. "I get married or try to one last time."

The answer was an obvious one. Of course he needed to get married. This was his family's home. He kept it going after his parents died. He ran the business. Even if he hated the house, he cared for it and protected it. His cousin wouldn't do that. I didn't know the man enough to pretend to understand what he was going through, but he wasn't Thoran, and this wasn't his home.

"Thoran, I'll—"

His palm was over my mouth before even I could register what was about to come out.

"No." He lowered his hand. "I won't marry you, love. I will never marry you."