11. Ian

eleven

Ian

Three years and two weeks ago

Two days before the Omega Meet starts

S ilver

He's here! How can this even be? He hasn't recognised me yet. He hasn't seen me. But I saw him. I'd know him out of a million faces. When he touched me, I vomited on myself. I made an excuse to Pack Vore and ran away.

I can't do this. I can't have a pack that can't protect me. It will be Onyx all over again.

Perhaps I could tell them? No, they would never believe me.

I can't ruin their lives.

I'm going to have to stop.

No contact.

I hate this. I hate my life.

I wish I'd never met them. Why can't I stop crying?

Present Day

I show her around my office, and then take her to lunch, sitting in a quiet café that isn't fancy. Part of me expects to hear her make a comment about the lack of class, but she surprises me. She relaxes as soon as we are hidden from the prying eyes of the public. I remember the bonding and wince. She was so weak; she doesn't look weak anymore; Silver looks alive.

She looks beautiful. It's hard not to reach across the table and take her hand in mine. It's been growing harder for the last couple of weeks to avoid her. To keep from pulling her into my arms.

I'm supposed to be angry with her. I'm supposed to be using the callous rejection she threw at me like a shield to keep me away, but I'm falling vulnerable again. Weak to her.

Ross keeps telling me I need to learn to trust.

"What would you like to eat?" I say, instead of letting my mind wander.

She hums. "You decide for me?"

I take her menu and fold it up. A silent server appears from nowhere and stands quietly near the wall of potted plants. He glances at me and winks. Hirasho and I have known each other for a good time now. He knows what I'm going to order, even if I pretend I might choose something different.

"She'll have the cheeseburger and fries and a chocolate shake. Hmm, make that two."

The server laughs softly. "Of course, Alpha Vore."

Silver smiles at me, her cheeks reddening. I look away. From temptation, from fear, from the desire to throw it all in and take a chance on her.

Hirasho leaves, and she looks down at her hands. "You have an incredible job. It must be fun doing something that leaves so many people so happy."

"It is fun. It's the most chilled workplace. I did get really lucky to get a job there."

"How did you get into it?"

I sit back, silent, while a different server puts our drinks down. As soon as he's gone, I take a mouthful. "I used to draw and stuff, muck around when I was a kid."

She peers at me. I feel an urge to squirm.

"My parents thought little of my hobbie." Why the hell did I just say that to her?

"You showed them."

Strangely, her words relax me. "What about you? What do you enjoy doing these days?"

"Well, other than making music with Ross, most of what I do, or did, was around the refuge. I'm not sure who I am anymore. I spent all those years hiding in whatever houses Onyx could find for us. When I was younger, it was just a relief to be able to get out of the house. But people would tell my dad or mum what I did. I was always watched."

I stare at her, trying to imagine that. "I didn't know."

"Well, it doesn't matter. Not anymore. I'm not the same woman that I used to be." She frowns. "Or maybe I am and I wasn't then. It gets confusing."

"Why were you at the Omega Meet? You never did tell us."

She looks down and toys with the straw in her drink.

"Onyx got a job working for Treyfield Pack. I was her sneaky tag-along. They caught us the day before the Omega Meet began and gave me a full ride. That was when things ended..."

Between us.

"Why?" I ask, needing to know.

"You know, I never stopped to ask that. I was just grateful. It seemed like a miracle when I needed it." She leans back when her plate gets put in front of her. "Ooh, thanks, this looks good."

"Thank you," I say to Hirasho.

I pick up my cheeseburger, and for several minutes, all we do is eat. She picks at her fries and looks up at me.

"I'm sorry for hurting you."

My food hits my stomach like a lead balloon.

"I didn't mean to hurt you. In fact, you were the last people in the world I wanted to hurt." She reaches out, pausing before she touches my fingers. I stare at her outstretched hand and flick my fingers out to brush against hers.

"It's over and in the past," I say gruffly. "We can be friends now." And I really, really want that. I want to trust her and take a chance.

"I'd like that." She smiles at me.

I pull my hand away and resume eating, feeling slightly unhappy with the conclusion of that conversation. What did they want with her? Why did Pack Treyfield give her that ride that destroyed us?

"Okay, friend." Ew, that tastes foul in my mouth. I push my plate away and glare at it. "So, what do you want to do? In your life, I mean."

"I have no idea. I mean, I want to help people."

"Like the women at the refuge?"

"Yes, some are there because their happy endings were torn apart. Some have never experienced it. All of them are hurting and scared. I loved working at the refuge." She deflates and stares at the remains of her food.

I didn't mean to make her sad. I study the curve of her lashes and the dark strands of her hair and how they whisper against her cheek. She's beautiful.

"All right, are you ready to go?"

She nods and stands up. Without thinking, I hold out my hand, but once it's there between us, I can't take it back. She glances at my eyes, checking before she puts her hand in mine.

"Come on. I want to take you to my favourite place."

We walk through the museum hand-in-hand. She peers at everything with such delight.

"Why here? It's great! I love it, but I never, ever would have guessed."

"Well, it's close to work, and I used to come here as a kid. I was a bit of a nerd. So, sometimes when I need some peace, I eat lunch and come here and just walk around for an hour."

"It's beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with me, Ian."

She honestly seems to love it, which again paints a picture of a woman that is completely at odds with the disaster at the Omega Meet.

We wander with minimal words said between us. I watch her eyes light up when she sees something interesting, how she looks back at me to make sure I'm watching. The long line of her neck when she leans down to read the descriptions. Her black hair, shining with light. Her hand is warm and soft in mine.

"Silver, I-"

She whirls and trips, stumbling into me. I catch her, holding her close and staring down at her. The bond between us hums with warmth, with feelings that could so easily be crushed.

I know what I should do.

I know exactly what I should do.

I lean down and kiss her. Her lips part, and her mouth opens. I press my tongue in, groaning at the fairy floss taste. I've dreamed about this moment for three years. And it is so much better than I could have imagined.

She presses closer, curling her arms around my neck.

This is everything. She's everything my insane heart wants. Still. Just like the day I met her.

I draw back, staring down at her. "Let me show you my favourite display."

She smiles.

It feels good to put that smile on her face, too good. Ross is right. I need to trust. Maybe take a chance.