Chapter 28

Chapter Twenty-Eight

GREY

I linger in the park after Hall scurries away, feeling a little like a rebellious teenager who ran away from home.

Taking a seat at a bench, I check my phone and note all the missed calls from Zane.

I check my messages next.

My eyes bulge when I see a 100 texts came in.

ZANE: Answer the phone, Grey.

ZANE: Dammit, at least let me explain.

ZANE: If you don't answer, in three minutes, I'm driving over to your mom and telling her everything.

ZANE: Okay, I won't do that.

ZANE: Just let me know you're safe.

ZANE: I'm sorry.

Sloane takes the seat beside me. "You can't avoid him forever."

"I can try."

"Are you leaving Redwood Prep? Are you moving to a remote village in Iceland and changing your name?"

"No."

"Then you might as well just go home to your husband."

"Grey?"

My muscles tighten and I twist my neck around to find Cadence standing behind me. She's dressed in a simple grey blouse and jeans. Her long, brown hair is tied back in a ponytail and she's gripping her phone tight.

"Hey."

"Hey." I cast a quick glance at Sloane before focusing on Cadence again. "What are you doing here?"

"You sent me your location, remember?"

"Right."

I wanted someone to at least know where I was and what I was doing in case things went south.

I glance behind her. "Where's Dutch?"

She wraps scrawny arms around herself and rubs. "Not sure."

That's… surprising. Cadence and Dutch are joined at the hip.

Well, it's more like Dutch is joined to her hip. To say the six foot four guitarist follows her around like a giant, perpetually-foaming-at-the-mouth puppy is an understatement.

She points to the bench. "May I?"

"Sure." I shift my purse from my left to my right side.

I notice Cadence hesitating and then sidestepping the place where Sloane is sitting to take my left side. The bench creaks as it accepts both our weights.

"How'd it go with Hall?" Cadence asks softly.

I rub my temple. "It… went."

"That bad?"

I nod and let the silence linger for a bit.

"Did The Kings plan a retaliation against Hall for breaking Zane's wrist?"

Cadence scrunches her nose. "Dutch didn't say anything about it. But I haven't really asked."

I bob my head. That sounds about right. I get the sense that the boys are protective of Cadence and Viola. There are some realities, some shadows, some demons that they don't reveal to the other girls.

Cadence's phone rings. She checks the screen and scoffs.

"Dutch?" I ask.

Right after that, my phone buzzes.

Cadence smirks. "Zane?"

I cough and hide my phone back in my purse.

Sloane shakes her head, flipping her blonde hair back when the breeze throws it in her face. "What is this? The Wives Running Away From Their Husbands Club? Why do I feel like the most mature one here?"

I give her the evil eye.

Cadence squints at me in a curious and mildly concerned way.

Awkwardly, I gesture to the moon that's hanging low above the trees. "It's a beautiful night, huh?"

Her smile is tight. "I guess so."

Just then, a mother pushing her little girl on a tricycle passes by. The little cutie pedals fast, not realizing that it's her mom propelling her along.

She laughs and looks back at her mom. "Mommy, look at me! I'm flying!"

Her mother grins.

Watching them suddenly reminds me of my mom and my heart pains me.

Hoping to distract myself, I turn to Cadence. "Hey, you want some ice—Cadence, are you okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." She smiles through watery tears.

"I'm out. If she starts crying, I'll cry and we both don't want that." Sloane announces and then she disappears.

I hesitate, not sure what to do. I've never seen Cadence cry. Not last semester, when she was being bullied by Dutch and his brothers. Not when she got kicked out of Redwood. And not even when she saw her mother's dead body in the morgue.

"Here." I rush to grab a pack of tissues and hand one over.

She takes it. "This is so embarrassing."

"Don't ever be embarrassed about crying. Not in front of me."

She pulls her lips into her mouth and I can tell those words mean a lot to her.

I want to rub her back, but I decide not to touch her while she composes herself. Cadence reminds me a lot of myself. She forces herself to be strong, even when she's feeling weak. And when that facade cracks, it's mortifying.

The tears stop quickly, almost as if she willed it. "Thanks for this," she sniffs, holding up the tissue. There's a pretty flush over her cheeks and she manages to look even more delicately beautiful with tears in her eyes.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

"No. I mean it's okay."

After muttering the words, she says nothing more. So I prompt her. "Did something happen with you and Dutch?"

"Dutch is an idiot, but that's not why I'm crying. It's…" She tilts her head back and blinks rapidly, struggling against another wave of emotions.

"Hey, it's okay." This time, I do rub her back. "Let's talk about something else. Tell me why Dutch was being an idiot."

She sucks in a big breath. "It's nothing."

"Try me."

"Tonight, when we were driving home, Dutch got a call from Finn. He got really tense, so I asked what happened. He didn't want to tell me. He just started ranting about moving out of the city and putting me and Viola in hiding. I told him absolutely not. My friends are here. Vi's friends are here. Then he said it's either we move or he puts a tracker in me."

I wince. "A tracker?"

"He was dead serious about it too." She huffs, seeming to get annoyed all over again. "That psychopath."

I can totally picture Dutch putting a tracker in her. I'm more surprised that he was nice enough to ask her opinion about it first.

"If he thinks he can tag me like a cow on a beef farm, he's crazy. I'll go down kicking and screaming first." Cadence's dark stare of wrath convinces me that she's good for the threat. "Can you believe he'd even suggest that?"

"Actually, I can."

She flings herself back into the bench.

"I'm not the poster child for marriage, but allow me to put my high school debate training into use and play the devil's advocate here."

" You're defending Dutch?"

"Whoa. Whoa. No, I'm not. But I do feel responsible for any danger you and the boys may be in." I think of the panic I'd felt when that car hit mine on the highway. This game we're playing is a dangerous one and I've come close to death too many times to ignore it.

"Everyone involved in investigating The Grateful Project is in danger because of me. We're dealing with a threat that has even Jarod Cross scared. Dutch might be taking things too far?—"

"As usual," she butts in darkly.

"—but he's understandably concerned and feeling helpless. We all do crazy things when we feel desperate and helpless."

"I guess." She bobs her head. "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"I told you about me and Dutch." Cadence wiggles a finger in the space between us. "It's your turn."

I shrug. "Zane is Zane. I can't say much else."

" So …"

" So there's nothing new to report."

"Okaaaay," she says in a high-pitched voice.

"Why?"

"I just thought…"

"What?"

"Nothing."

" What? " Panic lacing my tone, I ask, "Did Zane say something?"

"Not him…" she admits.

The answer comes to me immediately.

I face-palm. "Jinx."

"I can pretend not to know you guys… you know… did it if that makes you feel better."

Inside, every single organ in my body is cringing.

"But I don't get it," Cadence adds. "If you and Zane were close enough to sleep together, why wasn't he here to meet Hall with you? If he ever finds out I let you do this alone and didn't tell him?—"

"Zane doesn't need to know everything I'm doing."

"Huh."

"And we're not close."

"I see."

"He might be fulfilling a few," I stumble over the words, "husbandly duties, but neither of us are taking this marriage seriously."

Cadey turns somber. "You're wrong."

Something deep inside me jolts.

"Zane is taking this extremely seriously and I get the feeling you know that too."

"I…"

"Honestly, Miss Jamieson—Grey, I mean. I get it. I think someone like you—someone who's honest and passionate about justice and rules, you're probably torn up about what it means to be married to Zane with all the complications there. "

"Him being my student is not a ‘complication'. It's a fact. And it's wrong ." My voice trembles.

"Wrong." She sighs heavily. "Is Zane a minor?"

I swallow hard.

She stares at me like she's a woman on a mission. "Is he?"

"Eighteen is too young?—"

"Is he underage?" she asks firmly.

"No."

"Did you meet him when he was a minor?"

I squeeze my eyes shut. "Of course not. And I wouldn't have gotten involved with him at all if he was."

"Exactly. Zane knows that. Dutch knows that. We all know that."

"The world won't see it that way."

"Who cares what the world thinks? You two are married."

"On paper."

"Which is where most legal marriages are recognized." She taps a finger on the bench. "This isn't just a nasty little fling. This isn't some tabloid story. There were extenuating circumstances, sure. But the fact is he chose you to spend the rest of his life with."

She throws her hands up. "If you don't want to be with Zane, that's a completely separate matter and I one hundred percent support whatever decision you make. These boys have lived their whole lives getting what they want. Especially with girls. And especially Zane. It's about time he had to earn someone instead of just jumping from one girl to the next. Trust me. I'm not going to sugar coat who he is. But I'm also not going to lie about what he isn't . He isn't a child. And he isn't being manipulated. We both know that. He's well aware of what the world will think about his decision, what they'll say about you and him, all the obstacles you'll have to face, all of it. And with everything against him, he still chose to be with you. "

"That's the reason I was a part of your wedding, the reason I supported you two. There is something between you and Zane. But more importantly, there's something about you that makes Zane better. And there's something about Zane that makes you free. If he's willing to fight to protect that, what's left to be afraid of?"

I glance away. Her words are convincing. She's making it sound so easy, but reality won't change because of one uplifting speech from Dutch's wife.

"Cadence, I understand where you're coming from, but fighting for each other isn't enough. This is the real world. We can't go around bending the boundaries to fit our fantasies. There are rules. There are social conventions. Even if something isn't technically illegal, that doesn't mean it's acceptable behavior. If we start playing with those lines, people won't be ashamed of anything. And then the lines will continue to move and move and move further into the darkness."

She opens her mouth to argue.

I stop her. "That's how the bad guys get away without punishment. By protecting themselves behind technicalities. I understand where you're coming from and… and I'll even admit that I do feel something for Zane."

Her eyes light up.

"But , no matter what, Zane and I can't be together for real. It just can't happen. Not when he's eighteen and I'm twenty-four. Not when he's my student. Not when he's my step-brother. None of these things will change. The world won't change."

Cadence is practically rising out of her seat. Her face is flushed as she speaks passionately. "Grey, I didn't come back to Redwood after Dutch kicked me out because the world suddenly got more fair to scholarship students. I came back because one thing changed. Me. I decided to fight Dutch. I decided I wouldn't go down, even if it seemed impossible." She gives me a grateful look. "And that's when I called you. That's when you fought with me. Only one thing has to change and that's where all the other changes will come from. That's where you'll find the people who'll fight with you."

I look away, wanting to believe her, but shame has me in a chokehold and I can't shake it loose.

Cadence puts her hand on top of mine. "You're not like the people behind The Grateful Project. You're not anything like the murderers who hurt your best friend."

A ball of emotions lodge in my throat. It's like she grabbed the innards of my heart and pulled out all my deepest, darkest fears.

"I can't convince you to believe that, but I know one guy who won't stop until he does."

Something in her voice makes me look up.

A pair of blue, blue eyes slam into mine.

I gasp.

Jumbled emotions, thick and heady, suffocate my chest, my head feels pressurized and congested.

Because Dutch is running through the park, heading toward Cadence.

And beside him…

Is Zane.