Chapter 1

D ucking, I bare my teeth at the invisible attacker as I weave through the obstacle course, my body ghosting in and out of the shadows. None of the imagined attackers have faces, just the black masks that the ASP agents use.

My body screams in protest as I push it to its limits, ignoring the pain, needing to get stronger, faster. I know I'm being watched, but I don't let that stop me, and I continue training until my heart is pounding in my chest and my legs feel like they're going to give way. Finally, when I can't push any further, I stop and roll my neck, stretching my weary limbs. Walking slowly to the corner of the room, I grab my drink bottle and towel from where I left them, taking a deep swig of water. Wiping my face and neck, I take some deep inhales to settle my breathing, glancing up as a tug in my chest alerts me to my mate prowling towards me.

Both Garett and Killian are walking over to meet me, the former has his usual tender smile, but there's a tightness in his eyes that makes me look away. I know he's worried about me, but he wants to talk about what happened, about Tori, and I can't deal with that right now. Looking over at Killian, I see he has his trademark scowl in place, although the corner of his lip twitches up into a semi-smile that I know is purely for me .

Pushing off of the wall, I meet them halfway, wrapping my arms around them both and silently pulling them into my embrace. Killian lets out a surprised grunt, but doesn't say anything, just nuzzling his face into my hair and inhaling deeply. We've discovered that the true mate bond seems to make our scents more attractive to each other, especially since I've allowed my wolf to take over more.

"Ari." Garett's deep voice rumbles through me, bringing my attention back to him. Looking up, I know what he's going to say from the look on his face, and I'm not ready to hear it yet. I place a hand on his cheek, guide his face down to mine, and press our lips together. I know he wants to pull away, to say what he's been trying to say for the last week since the attack in the warehouse, but he relents under my kisses, returning them softly. I feel Killian stiffen slightly from where he is flush against me, but he doesn't move away. Instead, he starts pressing soft kisses to my neck. Our kisses begin to heat up, causing a flash of desire to shoot through me. My wolf is demanding, and right now, she wants her mates. Sure, Garett might not officially be her mate, but she's claimed him as hers.

A throat clearing in the room has us pulling away from each other's lips, a guilty smirk on Garett's face as we turn to acknowledge the other person in the room. We're in the Long Claw training gym, and standing opposite us is Alpha Philips, the leader of the bear pack, who's wearing a knowing smile on his lips.

"Alpha Philips, it's good to see you again." I bow my head slightly to him in a show of respect, but he just rolls his eyes and strides up to me, pulling me into a one-armed hug. I can't help but notice that he looks at Killian before he touches me, checking that my mate isn't going to go all territorial and start attacking him. I hold back a snort, Killian knows better than to pull that kind of shit. Although I'm usually against being touched by people I don't know well, I'm starting to get used to the bear's touchy-feely attitudes. As he embraces me, a pang fills my chest at his affectionate gesture. With the amount of trouble I've caused his pack, he shouldn't be treating me like a daughter. My thoughts must be clear on my face, as he frowns at me when he leans back.

"Ari, we've had this chat already. You only saw me yesterday, you don't have to keep greeting me like that. You're welcome in this pack. You've done much for us, over and over again. When will you start to realise your own worth?" Pulling away from his touch, I shrug off what he's saying, trying to fight the uncomfortable feeling his words bring.

I know deep down that the attack wasn't my fault, except I can't help but feel responsible, so I'll keep helping them as much as I can to redeem myself. I feel like I've just about earned my place in the Moon River Pack, but that was after months of working there and the relentless efforts of the pack to encourage me to embrace their way of life, so it's going to take much more time until I feel like I belong here at Long Claw.

Garett must sense my discomfort and saves me from answering the alpha's question by asking about pack business. He's been splitting his time between being with me at the wolf pack and helping here after the loss of several pack members from the attack. He's barely set foot in his bar recently and has hired a young bear from the pack to oversee the running of it. He says he doesn't mind, but I know he misses it.

"How is Max? And the twins?" Killian asks, the change of subject causing a wave of sadness to wash through me. The alpha's face turns grave, and the air seems to deflate out of him as he looks at Garett. I turn to stare up at my bear and see that he's trying to keep his face neutral, probably so as not to upset me, but I can tell he's troubled.

"Garett? What's going on, is everyone okay?" My voice rises in pitch with my concern for his brothers.

Another reason I've been training here is so I can be close to Garett's brothers. Just before the attack in the warehouse, Max and the twins found their fated mate, the bears' version of the true mated pair bond. I have no idea why fate was so cruel to let them find their mate, and then rip her from them so shortly after they'd met. Tori, my best friend, had triggered their bond, only to be killed during the attack. I haven't seen Max, the oldest of the brothers and the pack gamma, but I've visited the twins every day since. They've been…struggling.

Garett sighs before turning to look at me, his pain clear to see in his expression as he takes one of my hands in his.

"We didn't want to say anything, you feel guilty enough as it is, but they aren't getting better. I don't know what to do…" His voice hitches as he trails off. I've never seen this side of Garett before, and it makes me nervous. Killian's face is grave, and he steps forward and places a hand on the bear's shoulder in a comforting gesture.

"I know what it's like to lose someone so important to you. If I can help, then I will." His offer is genuine, and Garett nods his thanks to my mate.

"Thank you, Killian, we might need to take you up on that," Alpha Phillips replies. I look between the three of them, feeling frustration building in me as it becomes obvious I'm missing something.

"Will someone please tell me what's going on?" I demand, starting to lose my temper, my wolf walking just under the surface of my skin as my eyes glow with power.

Everyone looks uncomfortable, and eventually, the alpha nods and rubs the back of his neck.

"Max has lost control of his bear. Losing Tori has broken something inside him, and we can't reach him to bring him back to us," Philips explains, and I feel like I've been punched in the stomach. I've known Max wasn't fit for his duties as pack gamma, but I thought he'd taken off for a bit to get some space. I didn't know he's stuck in his bear form .

Killian's comment makes more sense now. He once told me how he lost control after losing his mate. When someone loses their fated mate, they not only lose the love of their life, but a part of themselves. The loss is so damaging to a shifter that they often die as well, or live a half-life, always craving something they can't have.

"No." The word bursts out of me. I won't let Max or the twins die because of this, even if it means I spend the rest of my life trying to make theirs more meaningful. They're my family, but I also owe it to Tori. "Let me see him."

"Ari, I'm not so sure that's a good idea—" Garett starts, obviously worried for my safety. But I can see he's torn, that part of him hopes, deep down, that I can help. I squeeze his hand and open my mouth to object, to say that I have to try, but Killian beats me to it.

"Let her try."

I spin around to look at him, shocked he's agreeing with this. Garett must be just as surprised as I am, judging by his expression. "Besides, we'll be there if we need to step in," Killian adds. His usual harsh expression is softer as he looks over at Garett, seeing the strain this is putting on him. I wonder at what point they went from adversaries to this kind of brotherhood. To be honest, seeing this more endearing side to Killian is making me realise that I still haven't scratched the surface with him. There is so much more to my grouchy mate than he lets people believe, his interaction with Garett only reminds me of this.

Garett and the alpha share a look before the latter nods and gestures for me to follow him. I hadn't expected to see him now, but there is no time like the present, I guess. My two men follow behind me as I walk alongside the alpha.

"Is this sort of thing common?" I keep my voice low as we work our way through the gym, not sure how much the other members of his pack know. Wincing, the alpha shakes his head.

"Yes and no. We haven't had a set of fated mates in years, none of the bear packs have, so I was ecstatic that the boys had found one. It was a bit of a shock that their mate was a witch, but I was happy for them," he elucidates before taking us down a corridor with a set of secure metal doors at the end. "For many bear shifters, our animals are very powerful and we can struggle to control them. Something as horrific as losing your fated mate is enough to let them take control."

Just before we reach the doors, Alpha Philips turns into a little alcove I hadn't noticed before. A floor-to-ceiling, one-way mirror fills the wall and, as I look in, I can't stop the little gasp that leaves my lips.

The inside of the room looks like it's been hit by a hurricane. The padded walls have been shredded, pillows and blankets are scattered around, their stuffing spread about the room like snow. In the middle of it all stands the biggest bear I've ever seen. I thought Garett was large in his animal form, but this is a whole new level. The bear has fur so dark, it's almost black, and standing on all fours, he's the size of a horse, with long, gleaming claws poking from his large paws.

"Let me in there." I can't seem to pull my eyes away from the bear in the room, but I can feel Garett stiffen next to me, wanting to protest.

"Are you sure, Ari?" Alpha Phillips asks. "You have nothing to prove, you don't have to do this." I can tell he's conflicted, butI meet his gaze and nod once.

"I do," I respond. I need to at least try.

Without another word, the alpha walks me to the door and presses a code into a pad. When the door opens, I hurry inside, and it closes quickly behind me, the lock reverberating loudly as I'm trapped inside the room with a feral bear.

The bear freezes, stopping his destruction as he lets out a heavy breath before turning to face me. He pulls his lips back in a snarl as he follows my movements with his gleaming, black eyes.

"Max. It's Ari, I'm here to help you," I murmur in a soothing tone, staying as still as I can. The last thing I want to do is antagonise a massive bear three times my size. He lets out a keening sound that's laced with pain, a sound I've never heard a bear make before. He suddenly shakes his head as if to clear a thought before his eyes narrow on me, and, with a bellow, he charges towards me.

Oh shit .