7. Spencer

CHAPTER 7

SPENCER

I found myself feeling completely comfortable with Nash as we sat at the kitchen table after I finished my sandwich. The only person I'd ever felt that way with was Vanessa. Somehow, I trusted Nash Lincoln, a man I barely knew. I trusted him much more than Blaire, which was strange because I'd known—and fucked—that man for nearly a year.

"So, who else will recognize you from escorting someone powerful?" He'd escorted Mitzi Shaw, the widow of the former Speaker of the House, Albert Shaw. Albert died from pancreatic cancer the first year I took office. He was a good man, but he bit like a rattlesnake if provoked.

Senators and staffers called him Copperhead behind his back, but it wasn't because his hair was dyed an unnatural rust color to cover the grey. Every party Vani and I attended at the Shaw's home was pleasant.

The couple was always kind and welcoming, introducing us to the power players in town as if we were family. I'd missed seeing Al's copper-penny hair in the chamber. He was a good man—until one crossed him.

"I usually just blend into the background. I fetch drinks when needed, and just like a fancy purse, I'm a shiny accessory. People don't know my name, and they don't care. You'd be better off not trying to be my friend. It'll cause you nothing but trouble." Nash's concern was written all over his face.

I touched his cheek where there was a short, scruffy beard I was craving to feel rubbed on every square inch of my body. I felt my cock beginning to swell in my jeans, but the sound of footsteps on the stairs reminded me that we weren't alone. We were in the home I shared with Vanessa, and doing anything with Nash would violate our sacred rule—I didn't fuck guys in our home.

I moved back from the gorgeous man and began clearing the table, glancing at the clock to see it was just after two in the afternoon. "I, uh, I guess I better…" My phone started ringing in my shirt pocket, so I retrieved it, seeing it was Jay.

"Hello? Jay? Son, are you okay?" After not hearing from him since the middle of August, even when he was at home, I prayed it was the beginning of the two of us rebuilding our relationship.

"I'm okay, Dad. I have a broken arm, but nothing that won't heal. I'm at Lewis Gale Hospital in town. My car was T-boned in an intersection near Walmart. I was going to get groceries with my roommate, Cole, and some asshole came out of nowhere. Cole has a broken arm and leg on his right side where the truck hit us. Can you get Mom to come down so we can straighten this out with the cops and the insurance? She didn't answer her phone."

While I was glad he was okay, my heart deflated a little at his explanation that he called because he couldn't get Vani on the phone. "Which arm?"

I headed out of the kitchen to find Vanessa, who was curled up on the couch in the den reading a book. I knelt in front of her and put the phone on speaker.

"My left. I held it up to keep the airbag from breaking my nose." Jay sounded exhausted.

" What ?" Vanessa quickly sat up, tossing off the cashmere throw that usually rested along the back of the brown leather couch.

"He was in a car accident. He was on his way to Walmart to grocery shop, but now he's at the hospital in Blacksburg. His roommate, Cole, has a broken arm and a broken leg from a truck T-boning them at an intersection. We need to get down there." I was going along whether my son liked it or not.

"Just send Mom. You don't need to come." Jay was insistent, but I was done hiding, especially from him.

Vanessa nodded that she understood I was going. "We'll be there in a few hours. Stay put. Check on your roommate."

Just then, Nash, who I'd forgotten all about, came into the room and sat in my recliner. "What's wrong?" He silently mouthed the words to me.

I handed Vani the phone and walked over to him to whisper. "Our son was in a car accident in Blacksburg where he attends college. We need to go down there to check on him and straighten things out about his car. Goddamn, when it rains it pours." I stared off into space, wondering what the fuck could go wrong next.

"You, uh, you want me to drive you guys down? You can take advantage of the ride and start figuring out the car. I'd suggest you check to see if the other driver remained on the scene, or do you know?" Nash's question was insightful.

"I didn't even think to ask. If you'd drive us, I'd appreciate it. I'm not in the right frame of mind to drive right now, and Vanessa is a horrible driver, so you'd be doing us a favor. I'll go pack." I didn't wait for either Nash or Vani to answer before I left the room.

I was grateful Nash was there. He had a level head for such a young guy, and I was impressed. I was becoming more fascinated with Nash Lincoln the more I was around him.

"It was a clean break of the ulna, Senator, but the radius is intact. Jay will be fine in about eight weeks, but he'll need to keep the cast on. I don't anticipate any lasting effects, really, but physical therapy will help him regain his strength. Any questions?" The doctor at the small hospital in Blacksburg was named Dr. Farthing. She had a congenial bedside manner.

We were in the hospital room of Jay's college roommate, Cole Glennon. Cole was a shy young man, much like our Jay, but the two of them seemed to get along well, which was a relief. I was watching the two of them as they explained the accident to Vanessa and Cole's father, Caleb.

It reminded me too much of when I met Mario at UVA, and the two of us became best friends. I truly needed to clear the bad air between us. We'd been through too much shit to throw away a friendship over something he said he didn't do.

Caleb Glennon walked over to where Dr. Farthing and I had been discussing Jay's injuries. "Uh, how long before I can take Cole home?"

I'd heard Caleb tell Cole that his mother was at home with his brother and sisters. I had no idea where the family lived because Jay hadn't mentioned much about his roommate since everything went to hell after I lost the election.

"We haven't met, but I'm Spencer Brady, Jay's father. We, uh, we didn't accompany Jay when he moved in." I began what would have been a long rambling explanation that I was putting together as I spoke so as not to look like the shitty father I'd become.

Caleb Glennon chuckled. "Yeah, I read about it. No worries, Senator. We all have our ups and downs in life." He then turned to the doctor, waiting for her response to when he could take his son home.

"Oh, uh, yes. I'd like to keep him overnight because he has a slight concussion, but you can take him home tomorrow. He's quite lucky." The doctor explained Cole's injuries, so I walked away and joined Vani and Jay, seeing my son's neon-pink cast for the first time.

"Wow, people will be able to see you from a mile away." I looked at the spot where there was a small heart and the initials, "CG" before Jay jerked his arm away.

I glanced at Vani who subtly shook her head that I shouldn't mention it, so I turned to Cole. "I'll take care of your hospital bill, son. I'm sorry you were hurt, but I'm grateful it wasn't anything that time and rest won't cure."

"Thank you, sir. Jay tried to get out of the way of the car, but it ran a light and was speeding. We were in the far right lane, so we got hit first. It was coming right at us, and Jay tried to pull me to his side of the car to lessen the impact, but my seatbelt was buckled."

Cole sounded as though he was guilty of something. Jay touched his shoulder, offering comfort to his friend.

The boy—young man—was cute. He had platinum blond hair and big blue eyes. I glanced at my son, who was nearly my height with dark-brown hair and light-brown eyes, and I saw something I didn't expect to see. The two of them were more than friends. They were boyfriends, or close to becoming boyfriends. "Jay, son, can I talk to you outside, please?"

I glanced at Vani, and she winked and nodded, so the two of us excused ourselves and left the room. I directed us toward the elevators to go down to the cafeteria so we could get something to drink. Once the doors closed, I turned to look at the young man who had changed more than I'd bothered to notice.

The remorse over my lack of attention to my son, being caught up in my own life too much to worry about him and Vani, hit home like a speeding truck. What a selfish bastard I'd become!

"You okay?" I placed my hand on his shoulder. Based on the two black eyes that were blooming, and the cut over his nose, he hadn't tried to shelter his face as he'd said. He'd tried to shelter Cole. The kid had strong protective instincts, and I was proud of him.

"Eh? My body aches. The doctor said I could take over-the-counter meds for the aches and pains, and I'll be okay in a few days. I gotta wear the cast for two months, though," repeating what the doctor had just told me.

The doors opened, and we stepped off the elevator, heading toward the cafeteria. There, sitting at a table alone, was Nash. When he saw me, he started to get up, but when he noticed Jay was with me, he sat back down. It wasn't that I didn't want to introduce Jay to Nash, but it just wasn't the right time. Jay was the priority, not me or my bullshit.

We went through the serving line, and of course, my son, the bottomless pit, ordered a double cheeseburger and fries. I got a coffee and grabbed a yogurt for Vani in case she was hungry. I paid for our food, and we went to a table near where Nash was sitting with a bowl of fruit and a bottle of water.

"So, we need to talk." I stared into my son's eyes, feeling like a pissant staring into the face of the young man who had changed from the little boy who used to love tossing a ball or going for a bike ride with Dad. The little boy I'd lost without noticing, right before my very eyes.

My son was a man now, and I was the biggest fuckup he'd ever met. No wonder he wouldn't talk to me. He was disappointed in me because I'd let him down, and I couldn't blame him.

"I'm sorry, Jay—James. You know, I was the one who gave you the nickname, Jay. You were such a happy kid, full of energy, and I said to your mother that you needed a less stuffy name because there was nothing stuffy about you." I remembered how much he'd loved it when I asked him if he wanted a nickname. He was all for it.

"I hate that name. James, I mean. That old lady at the foster house used to yell it at me when I did anything at all. She hated me, saying I was unruly and disrespectful." Jay's past before he came to live with Vani and me was a bitter memory for all of us.

When he first came to live with us, Jay was always testing the waters. He was rambunctious—all boy. I used to laugh at how hard he tried to piss us off, but there was nothing he could do or say that would make us angry with him. We were too damn glad to have him as part of our family.

"Well, then you never have to use it. Hell, we can legally change it if you'd like. You let me know. You can change your last name if you want as well."

It hit me hard that he might not want to be known as my son. God only knew how long the scandal would be in the headlines, and he didn't need the stigma my name brought with it.

I glanced up from stirring my coffee to see Jay studying me. "Why wouldn't I want to be a Brady? Do you not want me to be a Brady anymore?" He looked upset, and that was the last thing I wanted.

"No, of course not, son. I just meant if you're too embarrassed to be affiliated with me, then I get it. Right now, not many people want me around."

Jay swallowed and placed his burger on the plate, wiping his mouth as he chewed. "Have you always been that way?"

"What way?"

Jay leaned forward. "Gay. Or were you just experimenting? You're a little old for that, aren't you?"

I chuckled. "Yeah, I'm old, and yeah, I've always been gay."

Jay nodded. "Did Mom know? She was mad when that picture was in the paper, but she didn't cry. I didn't ask her about it because I didn't know what to say. Your ass was on the front page of the paper, Dad."

I let out a bitter chuckle at the memory. "Yeah, it was, and not a very flattering angle either, was it? Son, your mother has known me since we were in high school, and her family moved to Portsmouth. We were best friends, and she knew all about my orientation before we got married." I wasn't sure how much to share with him at that point. How much would he want to know?

"How old were you guys when you got married?" Jay seemed to genuinely want to know.

"Mom was seventeen, and I was your age."

"Wow! Why so young?" His face showed surprise, and I had to wonder how we'd never had this discussion before today. Was it another way I'd let him down?

I swallowed the bile at remembering the horrific incident that led Vani and me to getting married. "I should let Mom explain it, but it's a painful memory for her. You see, Grandma Velma was dating a guy while Mom was in high school. I'd just left Portsmouth to go to college, but Mom and I kept in touch while I was at school.

"The guy, his name was Rick Langley, and he had been dating Velma for a few months. One night, he, uh, he came over to the house while Grandma was working late, and he attacked your mother. Hell, he raped her. She got pregnant, and Grandma didn't believe her when she said Rick had been the aggressive one. Grandma was angry with your mother, not Rick, for what he'd done, and your mother didn't feel safe at home."

As I said the words, I felt the same gut-wrenching pain as when Vanessa had told me the whole ugly story. "Your mom called me at school, telling me what had happened to her. I got in the shitty old Jeep I had at the time, and I drove to Portsmouth to get her."

"Oh, god! I had no idea that happened. Why didn't she ever tell me?"

I shrugged at his question. "I think she was worried you might think less of her if you knew the truth. After we moved her out of there, we got married. She'd already been through hell, and in a small town, it was better if we got married than for people to find out she was pregnant by her mother's boyfriend. I had no problem saying I was the father of her baby because I wasn't out to many people."

"That's so horrible. Did she move with you?"

"Yeah, Mom finished high school in Blacksburg while we snuck around, and she stayed with me in the dorms. I got us an apartment as soon as I could so we didn't have to live with Mario." I then waited for the inevitable question.

"What about the baby? Did she give it up like my mom gave me up?"

I could see the pain in his face, but his abandonment wasn't a new issue—we'd taken him to a therapist when he was thirteen or so, because he had questions we couldn't answer.

"No, son. Even though that baby would have been a product of rape, we were both excited to have it. We knew it would be tough not to associate the baby with the crime, but we were ready to tackle anything. Unfortunately, Mom had a miscarriage, and she had to have a hysterectomy, which means she couldn't have any babies. We were sad for a long time, but then we met you, and here we are." I touched his arm before I sat back in my chair.

We should have had the conversation with Jay years ago, but for whatever reason, we didn't. Now, I was in the position of having to hash it out, or we would lose our son. I wasn't about to let him get away from us so easily. I loved the kid too much.

"How is she able to go see Grandma and be nice to her?" Jay's question was the same one I'd asked myself many times over the years.

I gave the only answer I had. "Your mother is a special woman with a forgiving heart. That's the only way I can explain it. Look, I'm sorry we didn't have this discussion sooner, but your mother and me? We love you more than anything. I hate that all of this happened, but we can't turn back time. I should have told you about myself sooner. I'm gay, son. I should have explained it to you before it was on the front page of the fucking paper, and for that, I'm sorry."

Jay finished his meal without saying anything more. I knew he was thinking that he had the worst parents in the world, so I braced myself for his condemnation.

After finishing his soda, offering the requisite burp, Jay wiped his mouth and placed his trash on the tray. "I guess this apple didn't fall far from the tree."

I had an idea about what he meant, but I wanted to give him the chance to explain things to me when he was comfortable. I'd been that kid once upon a time.

"So, uh, Cole's nice. You guys seem to get along well." Would my comment be the prompt for him to fill in the blanks?

"We started chatting when we found out we'd be roommates. Both of us got early acceptance, and once we were paired, we reached out so we wouldn't be uncomfortable when we got to school. He's pretty shy, but once you get to know him, he's really sweet and kind, Dad. His parents have known he's gay since he was fifteen, and they support him."

My heart kicked up a bit. His next words hit their target.

"I didn't tell you about me, but Mom knows. I told her when I started high school. She kept telling me it was fine to talk to you about it, but I didn't know how you'd react, especially since you're a senator, so I didn't say anything."

I reached across the table and placed my hand on his broken arm, hoping my gesture of support was welcome. "I love you, Jay, and I'm proud of the man you've become. I'll support you in anything you ever do." I stood and pulled Jay up with me, hugging him.

"God, Dad. Stop." He might have protested, but he didn't let me go. I chuckled because it was the typical teenage response, and I was glad to hear it. We were a normal family, and having the confirmation of it from my son gave me a sense of relief.

I released him and stepped back. "I'm sorry, but I'm not sorry. How does that go?" It was something I'd seen online.

Jay laughed, and I heard Nash chuckle before he coughed, "Dumbass." Yeah, that one hit home.

I looked up to see the smirk on the handsome man's face, and I didn't know what to say. God, he was gorgeous, and I was falling under his spell.

Dumbass as charged .