22. Spencer

CHAPTER 22

SPENCER

I was in a fucking awful mood on Christmas Eve morning. I'd spoken to Nash when he arrived in Sparta, and then the next morning, but he wasn't very talkative, and I could hear lots of noise in the background. I didn't know what he was doing or how to shake off the jealousy that he'd rather spend the holiday with his biker friends than me, but Vani told me I was acting like a two-year-old, so I tried to give him his space.

We texted a few times, and his words were upbeat. He told me he missed me and loved me, and really, what more could I want from the man? We weren't joined at the hip!

"Dad, Cole and I have some last-minute shopping to do. Do you think the roads are okay? I didn't know Mom wanted us to go see Grandma Velma on the day after Christmas, so I need to get her a gift."

We'd shoveled about an inch of snow that had fallen earlier that morning. It was still snowing, but the accumulation was supposed to be minimal, so it was more for something to do than necessity.

I pulled off my knit cap after hanging up the snow shovel. "Yeah, I think you guys will be fine. You okay to drive on it?" Jay was a good driver, but he was in a rental, since we hadn't replaced his totaled Escape, and he was driving a full-size pickup, which could be light in the back end with an empty truck bed.

"Yeah. Better here than in Blacksburg," he responded. His cast had been gone for a couple of weeks since his injury was more minor than Cole's but having had his first car accident had seemed to make him skittish.

"You guys want me to come with you?" Vani had gone to pick up the ham Nash had ordered at the store in Tyson's Corner, claiming she had a few last-minute things to pick up as well. How I ended up being the only one who was ready for the holiday was a fucking miracle.

"Not unless you need something. I was gonna take Cole to lunch after we finished shopping. We're going to the outlet mall in Leesburg, and then I thought we'd go into town and eat at Lightfoot."

Lightfoot was a great restaurant in downtown Leesburg. It inhabited an old bank building, and the wine cave was in the old vault. The ornate marble pillars and trim had been restored when the restaurant owner bought the building from a now defunct banking organization after it had been empty for about five years. Vani and I loved to go there on Saturdays when we had time for their grilled cheese special and smoked tomato soup.

"That sounds nice, Jay. You guys go and have a great day out. I think Mom wants you guys to go with her to the bell concert at Emmanuel Lutheran in Vienna at five, so text her to confirm if she still wants to go."

It was a family tradition for us, but in light of all the shit that went down, I was afraid the roof would fall in on my head if I entered the building. I'd told Vanessa to take Jay and Cole with her. I'd be fine at home.

The boys went inside to clean up, and I went to the kitchen to make myself a drink, hoping the day would go by faster if I was blurry eyed. I reached for some of the large ice cubes I preferred, pouring a healthy two fingers into my rocks glass.

I was about to head to the family room when my phone rang. It was Nash, which immediately lifted my mood. "Nash? How are you?"

"I'm fine, babe. Look, I hate to do this over the phone, but the snow is coming down too heavy for me to drive back tonight. Can you get to your computer and get on Skype?" Hell, if Skype was all I could get from him on Christmas Eve, I'd take it.

"Sure. Uh, give me about ten minutes. I've tracked snow inside, and Vani will skin me alive. I'll be there in ten minutes."

"Okay, love you," Nash offered before the line went dead.

I went to the garage and grabbed the mop to clean up the mess I'd made by not taking off my shoes when I came inside. While I was cleaning up, Vani returned home, so I helped her carry things in from the car, and then she told me we needed to talk about something, so while I helped her put away groceries, she proceeded to explain to me that she'd decided to go to the new grocery store at Reston Town Center—where she ran into Blaire and Mitch.

"And, Spence, they were wearing matching wedding rings. Do you think they got married?"

"Fuck, probably. Sean said Blaire was screwing Mitch while we were each dating him, so who knows. I mean, Blaire was clearly out for himself, and if what Sean said was true about Mitch's financial situation, then I could definitely see where Blaire would marry him for money." My mood had gone from bad to worse.

"Who did Mitch work for before he came to work for you?" Vani put some plastic containers into the fridge. Clearly, we'd abandoned any thoughts of making sides ourselves without Nash there to oversee that we didn't poison anyone.

"He worked for Representative Schneider from Ohio, but he was recommended to me by Judge Blackwell, my father's old college buddy who sits on the U.S. Court of Appeals. I ran into Blackwell at a bar association luncheon where we were both speaking, and we sat together to eat. I mentioned Tina was leaving, and he told me about Mitch."

We puttered around the kitchen for a while, me opening the mail, while Vani stacked her last-minute gifts under the tree. She came back into the kitchen with a sad smile on her face. "I wish Nash was here. It feels empty without him."

That reminded me that I was supposed to Skype with him. "Shit! He called just as you came home. I was supposed to get on Skype with him."

I glanced at the clock to see an hour had gone by. What a jackass I was to forget about him.

"He's been waiting an hour." I hurried upstairs to try to get him on Skype. I quickly logged into my account, seeing five notifications of a missed call. I tried to call back, but it went unanswered, so I reached for my cell, seeing it was dead, yet again.

I quickly went in search of a charger, finding the plug where mine usually resided was empty. "Vani!" I bellowed.

"What?" she yelled back, which made me laugh. Old habits would die hard.

I ran downstairs, nearly busting my ass on the slick hardwood in my socked feet. I found her in the laundry room folding towels. "Can you call Nash? He was waiting for me to Skype, and I missed him. My phone's dead, and my charger is missing!"

Vani sighed and went to her purse, retrieving her phone and turning it to me. "Mine's dead as well. Let me plug it in and try to call him. How could you forget?"

"You came in with groceries and… Don't start, Vanessa. Just call him, please." Vani called again, and it went to voicemail. She called a few more times, but again, all the calls went to voicemail.

"What should I do?" My heart was clenching at the fact I'd forgotten Nash needed to talk to me. Vani showed up, and I completely blew him off, which was a horrible thing to do to the man I loved.

Vani shook her head. "You're so bad at this, Spence."

"Yeah, well, you wanted to talk to me, and you're my…" My mouth snapped shut.

Vani gave me a gentle smile. "Not anymore, Spencer. You have a new priority, and he's probably wondering what happened to you." She'd plucked the thoughts from my brain.

She unplugged her phone and reached out her hand, where I placed my phone, watching her plug it in with her charger. I remembered mine was in the Navigator, which was with Nash. Damn, I had to get better at being a partner to the man, especially if I wanted him to stick around.

I'd been calling Nash's cell phone for hours, though it seemed like days! Vani, Cole, and Jay had attended the bell concert, and after they returned home, we heated up a couple of frozen pizzas and ate together, while they told me about the concert. After, we went to the family room to relax with a Christmas movie—or so I thought. The rest of them found something else to do.

Vani pulled out the family photo albums to share photos of Christmases past with Cole. The pictures of Jay as a kid had me ready to cry as I looked at the young man that my son had grown to be. I was proud of him, and seeing how well he treated Cole, I knew he'd be a great boyfriend to the young man.

After everyone went to bed, I walked into the master and stared at the king-sized bed I'd grown accustomed to sharing with Nash. I knew his scent was on the sheets, but without him there, playing the part of my own personal bed warmer, it looked like a lonely island.

I went to the den and grabbed a book from the shelves that I hadn't read in years, and I sat down in the leather recliner, not turning on the television so as not to disturb the sleeping folks in the house.

I opened the old Zane Grey novel I'd had since high school. It had been a Christmas gift from my parents when I was fifteen and developed an affinity for the writer, mostly because I was interested in a farm boy from school who spoke the way Zane Grey's characters spoke in the books. It was a leather-bound copy of a collection of short stories that were published in the late seventies, long after the writer had passed. When I saw the handwritten message inside it from my father, my heart seized with pain.

To my son—You are my biggest accomplishment! I'm proud of you every day, and I look forward to your successes, as much as I've enjoyed my own. Love, Dad

I felt the tears fall, and of course, I blamed the liquor I'd steadily consumed all evening. No, it wouldn't make anything better, but a little self-medicating hadn't seemed like a bad idea.

I moved from the chair to the couch, my back starting to bother me from the snow shoveling I'd done with Jay earlier that day. If I wasn't so fucking lazy, I'd get up and take a hot shower.

Hell, if Nash was home, we'd take a bath, but he wasn't home, was he? He was spending the holiday with his biker friends. I didn't like it one bit. There was something about that Denny guy that rubbed me the wrong way.

I prayed that whatever he'd wanted to talk to me about earlier had nothing to do with him wanting to leave me behind for that Denny character.

I was a lot of work, but maybe if I put in more effort? Hell, I owed him everything I had inside me. I knew he'd discussed with Vani how much damage his past could do to my reputation, but hell, I'd already annihilated it, so how much worse could it really get?

I felt a touch to my chest and opened my eyes to see Nash standing over me. He looked exhausted, but he was there. I quickly sat up, noticing there was a blanket over me. The rocks glass and bottle of Glenfiddich I'd left on the coffee table were gone, which smacked of Vani, bless her heart.

"When did you get home?" The sun was starting to turn the purple sky to baby blue.

I pulled Nash on top of me and kissed him, not minding my morning breath at all. I wrapped my arms around him and held on for dear life. I was forty-five years old, and I was in love with a wonderful young guy. I had to get better about showing him.

Our tongues swirled as my hands landed on his gorgeous ass. He wrapped his arms around my neck, holding me tight as well. Having him with me was the best cure for the Christmas blues I'd ever seen.

After frantic kisses, Nash broke the seal of our lips and pulled back, offering me a sexy smile. "It's just six thirty. Wanna go to your room?"

He was still wearing his winter coat, which made me smile. "Yeah. Let's go, and it's our room. Thank you for coming back." I kissed him again.

Feeling him in my arms had turned my mood from shitty to giddy. As corny as it sounded in my head, it was the truth.

Nash pulled me up from the couch, and when I stood, he hugged me tightly, which sort of surprised me. I smirked as I kissed his neck. "You missed me?"

"Yeah, I did. Come on." He dragged me down the hallway to the room we shared, closing the door and locking it after we were both inside.

I helped him out of his coat, throwing it on the chair in the corner. "How bad was the drive?" It had been steadily snowing all day and night, and the last time I'd looked at the weather report, the Weather Service was saying the roads down in southern Virginia were barely passable, which had me feeling guilty again for missing Nash's Skype call.

"I'm so sorry I missed your Skype calls. Vani came home from the store, and I helped her carry in groceries. She saw Blaire and Mitch at the store as well." It was a feeble excuse at best. I owed him more than that, but he didn't seem interested in conversation.

"Don't worry about it. Let's go to bed. I want you to fuck me, Spencer." Nash's voice was demanding, which was unlike his usual easy-going demeanor. I stared at him and saw he was serious.

"Okay, but is something wrong?" His request to speak earlier in the day, and now his determination to have me fuck him had me more than a little worried. We were equal-opportunity lovers, but why it was suddenly important for me to top Nash had me worried. Was it the last bow before he left me behind?

We undressed each other quickly, my heart beating out of my chest with worry. It was on the tip of my tongue to ask him what was going on, but I wasn't about to be the one to ruin our time together.

Nash dropped onto the bed and pulled me with him, settling under me, which was a thrill. It would be the first time I'd topped him, and I prayed it wasn't the last. "How would you like me?" Nash whispered as he studied my face.

I rested on my elbows, looking into his beautiful hazel eyes. "I wanna feast on that gorgeous ass, and then I wanna look into your beautiful eyes when I stake my claim."

Nash chuckled. "Let's take this to the shower first, Senator. Your plan sounds like there's no need for debate."

That comment made me laugh. I pulled him up with me, and we went into the master bathroom. I turned on the shower while Nash retrieved towels from the linen closet. Once the water was at the right temperature, I walked into the shower and motioned for him to join me. The little blush on his cheeks revved my engine perfectly.

I turned Nash toward the spray and stood behind him, whispering, "Why didn't you wait to come home until tomorrow?"

"I was stupid to leave you guys in the first place. Jay's gonna think whatever he wants about us, but I need you, Spence." I hit the button on the dispenser for body wash.

Oh, I wasn't about to deny him anything. I washed his back as he ducked his head under the spray. I slid my soapy fingers down his crack before I reached under and washed his balls and taint, feeling him relax a bit more.

I used the conditioner in the dispenser next to the body wash to loosen him a bit and turned him to rinse his ass. "Nash, love, is something wrong?"

He rinsed the shampoo from his hair. "No, Spence. I just… I want you to make me yours. I liked seeing my friends, but I belong here with you. I love you, and I want to feel you inside me." His words were all I needed to hear.

We quickly finished our shower and dried off. I brushed my teeth, noticing Nash's toothbrush was missing. I rinsed mine quickly and handed it to him, receiving a grin in return. I hung the towels over the rack and walked out of the bathroom to turn down the covers on the bed.

I turned off the ceiling light and turned on one of the bedside lamps so I could see his gorgeous naked body. Watching myself slide into him would be a dream come true.

Nash came out of the bathroom in all his naked glory, falling onto the bed with me. "I love you, Spencer, but if it's too much for you to give up Vani and Jay, then tell me, and I'm gone."

I'd started working my way between his legs, but I stopped. Clearly, we needed to have a discussion before we went any further.

"What the hell happened? Did those bikers do something to you? Are you okay?" I couldn't imagine why he would want to leave me when I'd just found him.

"It's nothing that can't wait until later. Please, make love to me." How could I deny him?

I reached into the nightstand and found the lube and a condom, hating the idea we needed to have anything between us. Nash was insistent because of his previous profession, but I was determined they'd be gone after the first of the year.

I placed my hands under Nash's muscular ass and lifted it to my mouth, diving in for my first taste, hoping and praying it wouldn't be my last.

He was beautiful, and the next time we were together in such a fashion, the coconut conditioner wouldn't be what I smelled as I feasted on him. I wanted his natural scent, and I'd damn well get it next time.

I swirled my tongue over his hole before I attempted to push inside. Nash moaned, and his noises had me doubling down on him. I opened the lube and slicked my fingers before I began working my index finger inside him as I sucked on his balls and ran my tongue over his taint. I nipped it before I pushed further inside him, up to the second knuckle.

"Please, Spence." Nash pressed against my finger. I put him through the paces, fucking him with my tongue and my fingers before he begged me to stop.

"Baby, I'm about to blow. Please, suit up." Oh, I was happy to oblige.

I pushed the head of my cock against his entrance, resting his legs on my thighs. "I'll go slow."

I gently pushed in to test the waters. Nash, however, wasn't in the mood to go slow. He angled his ass just right, pressing back on my cock, which slid in without hesitation.

"Ahh! Yeah, Spence. Fuck me." His gasp fed my ego.

From my side, I was ready to come, so I stilled him. "Baby, give me a fighting chance! It's been a while for me." I took deep breaths to back off the fucking edge.

Nash's ass was made for me, and I needed to claim it properly. I wasn't a thirty-second man, but the luxurious feel of him wrapped around me had me nearly ready to blow.

Nash chuckled. "Okay, Senator. I'll give you some time." He wrapped his hand around his gorgeous prick and began pumping.

"Fuck no. You're not going without me." I rested on my elbows that were next to his ears to gain control.

I nipped at his soft lips, so grateful to have him as mine. I finally slid my tongue into his mouth, tasting my toothpaste and closing my eyes to concentrate solely on Nash and everything about him.

His taste... His sounds... The feel of his hands on my shoulders... Wrapping around my neck and pulling me closer to him. It was a heady feeling to have the gorgeous young man want me. If I was a betting man, I'd have never put a dime on it.

Unfortunately, the longer we kissed, the more my urge to fill him grew, and suddenly, I could stop myself. "Fuck, I can't…" I groaned as I pounded into him.

Nash wasn't shy, pushing back in perfect rhythm. I felt as if I'd died and gone to heaven, as I wrapped my fist around his hard cock to take him with me.

"Oh, fuck!" His loud moan let me know I'd hit that spot inside him, just as he hit inside me every fucking time we made love.

"Let's go." I pounded him and jacked his hard rod in time. When Nash shot off, the white stream covered his chest and ran down my hand like lava. I thrust into him three more times before I couldn't stop myself, filling the fucking condom.

I couldn't form sentences, so I leaned forward and gently kissed his soft lips. "I love you."

"I love you too." That was exactly what I needed to hear. As long as I had Nash Lincoln, I could weather any storm.