Chapter Twenty-One

"We must speak with Lady Hannah." Joseph cleared his throat. "Now."

He glanced to where Lady Louisa was grasping his arm, glad that she stood with him at least, though she had said nothing to him in the carriage ride. She had not even paused to call for a maid and that, Joseph considered, had been a good thing for it meant that she was urgent in her desire to hear what Lady Hannah had to say. His chest grew tight as they waited for the butler's return, hoping that they would be given the chance for an audience with Lady Hannah that afternoon. He did not think that he could wait until another time, not when Lady Louisa had been so willing to come with him. This was his one moment with her, his one chance, he felt, for her to learn the truth. A truth he had to cling onto in the hope that she might finally believe him and accept all that he wanted to tell her.

"Lady Hannah and her mother, Lady Wigton, will see you in the drawing room."

Joseph nodded, glanced again to Lady Louisa but then followed after the butler without a word, his heart picking up speed as he walked. Pressing his lips tight together, he bowed low before the two ladies, though, he noted, Lady Hannah's face was rather pale, her gaze darting from himself to Lady Louisa and back again.

"Good afternoon, Your Grace, Lady Louisa." Lady Wigton gestured for them both to sit down though Joseph could see the confusion in her expression. "How unexpected it is to have you both call."

"There is a purpose in our visit, Lady Wigton," Joseph began, though Lady Louisa's hand tightened on his arm and he looked to her, a little uncertain as to why she had squeezed his arm so. Was it that she wished to silence him? And if so, for what purpose?

"I shall ring for tea, Mama." Lady Hannah rose quickly and did as she had said, but Joseph kept his gaze upon her as she returned to her seat. The lady, however, did not look back at him as he might have expected. Instead, her head bent forward, her gaze fell low and she licked her lips, clearly a little ill at ease. Joseph waited until Lady Louisa had taken a seat before he also sat down, choosing the chair that was as close to his betrothed as he could. He wanted to be very near to her indeed, as though this might be the very last moment he was in her company.

"Well, now." Lady Wigton smiled but it did not linger. "Might I ask if –"

"I received your letter, Lady Hannah."

Joseph's skin prickled as Lady Louisa spoke up, throwing an apologetic look towards Lady Wigton for the interruption. He remained where he was, just as a scratch came to the door with the maid coming in with the tea tray. It was set out in silence, for the conversation immediately came to a close so that the servant would not overhear anything and then gossip about it as the servants were so often inclined to do. Taking the opportunity to study Lady Hannah's expression, Joseph's eyebrows lifted in surprise. Lady Hannah had gone very pale indeed, her eyes rounded and fixed to Lady Louisa's, her hands gripping the arms of the chair.

She knows what is being spoken of, Joseph thought to himself, hope beginning to rise in his chest. Lady Louisa too, she must know now that Lady Hannah sent the note!

It had not been something that either of them had mentioned on their carriage ride over to Lady Hannah's abode but it seemed now that Lady Louisa had done a good deal of thinking in their time apart. Perhaps she had already come to the same realization as he – though she had not yet said anything.

"Letter?" Lady Wigton frowned, then waved one hand in her daughter's direction. "Hannah, might you pour the tea? Goodness, this is the future Duchess of Yarmouth! She will think you dreadfully rude, I am sure!"

"No, I do not, not in the least." Lady Louisa smiled and Joseph let out a slow, surreptitious breath, his heart beginning to free itself of all the tension that he had wound around it. "Although I would certainly enjoy a cup of tea." She smiled and Joseph swallowed tightly, seeing the beauty of both her face and her character shining through. She was gentle in her approach, considerate and kind and Joseph marveled at her. This was not what he wanted to do. Truth be told, he wanted to rail at Lady Hannah, to demand with both fury and upset in his voice, that she told them everything, heedless to the fright he might cause her. But Lady Louisa was the utter opposite of him. She was the opposite of him in every way, Joseph considered, and that was the beauty of her. How little he deserved having such a sweetness beside him! And how grateful he was for all that she brought, offered and gave to him.

"Thank you." He took the tea cup from Lady Hannah, noticing the slight tremble in her fingers. Joseph glanced up at the lady but she had already stepped back, leaving him to catch Lady Louisa's eye. She was not smiling but gave him a small nod, as though to say that she knew what had to be said, what had to be done and would be willing to do it.

"Lady Wigton," she began, her voice soft. "Might I be so bold as to ask for a few minutes alone with Lady Hannah? There is a private matter that I wish to discuss with her and, you can understand, I can only really speak freely if we have no other company. I can assure you, it will only be for a few minutes and we would both be very much in your debt." A sidelong glance towards Joseph from Lady Louisa told him that she needed him to lay emphasis on this and, quickly, Joseph did so.

"We would be very much in your debt," he said, seeing the surprise leap into Lady Wigton's expression. "It is a strange request, I am sure, but we would not ask unless it was important."

"And it is very important." Lady Louisa smiled but lifted her eyebrows expectantly and, much to Joseph's relief, Lady Wigton gave her consent, albeit in a somewhat flustered manner.

"This is most extraordinary, I must say," she began, shaking her head but then rising to her feet. "Hannah? Do you know what this matter is about?"

Lady Hannah swallowed. "Yes, Mama, I believe I do. I am happy to speak with Lady Louisa."

Lady Wigton cleared her throat, clasping her hands in front of her. "Very well, I shall take my leave, though I would like to know something about what is to be discussed, if you please? I do hope that my daughter will not suffer any consequences from this."

Joseph shook his head. "No, of course not."

"Indeed not," Lady Louisa added. "It is only about a lady of the ton whom both Lady Hannah and myself are acquainted with. I have heard something about her and wish to clarify as to whether or not Lady Hannah has heard the same. I must be very careful about my reputation, given that I am soon to be a Duchess, but at the same time, I do not want to speak falsehoods as though they were truths! That is why I ask for some privacy. I am sure that you understand, Lady Wigton, for you are always full of wisdom."

This seemed to satisfy Lady Wigton, for a hint of a smile drew itself across her mouth and, with a nod, she stepped out of the room.

Silence fell.

Joseph turned his attention back towards Lady Hannah, noting how the lady began to smooth out her dress, her head lowered, her gaze pinned to her hands rather than looking at either of them.

"You sent Louisa a letter, Lady Hannah," Joseph began, doing his best to keep his voice calm and quiet. "You seek to end the betrothal between us, I think."

Lady Hannah's frame grew tight. "I did not want you to marry her."

"Because you knew that I had no choice in the matter," Lady Louisa said, gently. "You believed that my father consented, being either unaware of the Duke's reputation or being heedless to it."

Lady Hannah finally lifted her head. "I know what he did to my dear friend, Lady Sara," she said, as though Joseph was not in the room. "I could not bear to think of you suffering in a marriage to him! We are not very well known to each other, yes, but we are acquainted enough for me to know that you are kind, selfless and good-hearted – the very opposite of the Duke of Yarmouth! I found out that the engagement came about through the Duchess of Yarmouth approaching your father and, given what I know of your father, I thought I would do what I could to encourage him to be the one to end the betrothal. I did not think that you would be able to do so without his consent."

Lady Louisa closed her eyes briefly, though she did smile. "You are most considerate, Lady Hannah."

"Nor did I want him to have the happiness that he denied so many others," Lady Hannah continued, her voice breaking now. "It did not seem right."

"That is because it is not right nor fair," Joseph interrupted, forcing both ladies to turn to him. He closed his eyes for a moment, the weight of his past sins coming to sit heavily upon his chest. "You are quite right in all that you have said, Lady Hannah. None of what I have done in the past was good or right. To have been given the gift of Lady Louisa's hand in mine is something that I certainly do not deserve and I will fully admit to that." Pausing for a moment, he spread out his hands either side. "I do not know what else to say to you but to apologise for the pain, the sorrow and the anguish that I caused to so many, including to your friend, Lady Sara. I have told Lady Louisa that I want to change, that I wish to alter my character so that I might become the very best gentleman in all of England – in all of the world, if that were possible – and that is because of what I have seen in her. I do not think I shall ever deserve her, do not believe that I shall ever be good enough to have her by my side and that is something I shall bear all of my days. A consequence, mayhap, of all that I have done but it is a weight I shall bear willingly."

Lady Hannah's eyes widened just a fraction, though she then quickly frowned. "I – I do not know whether I can believe you."

"You can."

Joseph's heart trembled as he looked to Lady Louisa. She was looking up at him, her eyes shining, her lips in a soft smile. He could not speak, such was the tightness in his throat, but his joy exploded through him all the same.

"You told Lady Clement to speak those lies to the Duke and to the ton ?" Lady Louisa continued, still in a gentle tone. "You spread rumours about the Duke too?"

Lady Hannah closed her eyes and a single tear fell to her cheek. "I will admit that I did. I hoped that one of the rumours would be enough to have Lord Jedburgh tell you to end the engagement but when it did not, I chose to speak to Lady Clement. I knew of her liaisons – it does not matter how – but I also was aware that some of them held great shame for her. I am sorry if I injured you in the process, Lady Louisa." Her voice shaking now, Lady Hannah sniffed once, twice, and then opened her eyes, reaching to take Lady Louisa's hand. "I wanted to protect you, knowing all that you had done and all that you had given up for your sisters."

"How very kind of you to think so of me." Lady Louisa leaned a little closer to Lady Hannah, clearly wanting to reassure her. "I will admit, I did not want to marry the Duke of Yarmouth. However, now with the time that we have spent together and the changes I have seen in him, I confess that my heart now fully desires to be with him. Do not think that I have come to berate you or to demand your confession in front of the ton , for that is not something that I either would do or would desire. All I want now is to thank you for your consideration of me, to tell you that I do value your concern – but also to ask you now to desist."

Lady Hannah nodded, her gaze falling to the floor.

"I think I shall be quite contented with the Duke of Yarmouth," Lady Louisa continued, though her gaze swung to Joseph, a sweetness there that he had never expected to see. "We shall be very happily married, I am sure."