Chapter 61

Reece

The carrots and beets are ready to be harvested. Today is a good day, I've been telling myself since I got up this morning. Today is a good day.

"The carrots are sweeter after they've been exposed to the frost," Sawyer says, holding up a bunch he's just pulled out of the ground. "These are the ones you planted."

My face cracks with a smile. "I can't believe they actually grew."

"You did a great job. We'll use these ones for tonight's dinner."

I walk over to him and circle his neck with my arms. His hair is still damp from his shower and his hands are stained with soil. I love how he smells like the earth and body wash. Asher is upstairs in the shower, using the same body wash. "Thank you."

He grins sexily.

"What?"

"You didn't ask me if I was sure."

I frown and then, understanding, I say, "I think I did a good job too. Thank you for teaching me."

"Are you happy, Reece?" he asks, serious now. "Here with us?"

I pull him closer, rub the tip of my nose along his. "I've never been happier."

"Why haven't you said anything about today?" It's the sadness in his eyes that brings tears to mine.

"We're already going through all this shit with Asher. I didn't want—"

He pulls me into his arms, holding me so tightly against him I feel like my lungs are being crushed. "Abby's birthday is, and will always be, one of the most important things we remember from now on, do you hear me, Reece?"

I nod against his chest, unable to contain my tears now and unable to speak for the lump in my throat. I tried so hard all morning and afternoon to keep it at the back of my mind.

"We won't forget her, baby. Don't ever feel like you're too much. You're not."

I nod again. "She would've been a year old."

"She would've been the best baby in the world. Like her daddy is the best person in the world."

And that's when everything comes out. Bursting through the walls, smashing them, and I can hardly stand up straight. Sawyer tightens his embrace, whispering words I can't make out, but it doesn't matter because he's just loving me. The words don't matter because I feel his love for me, surrounding me like a thick cloud.

"Do you really think so, Sawyer?" I choke out. "That she would've been a bit like her daddy?"

"Yeah, I really think so, baby."

"Thank you," I sniff into his chest. "For letting me visit. For letting me stay. Thank you for everything."

"You belong here now. Don't ever forget that."

The purr of a vehicle breaks the moment and I pull away quickly. What if it's someone from school? Asher may appeal his termination. We don't want to give anyone more to talk about and jeopardize his chances.

I step out Sawyer's embrace and turn toward the sound of the approaching car.

It's the sleekness of the vehicle that gets my guard up first. Sawyer is already walking across the stone walkway, on his way to greet the visitor. My eyes move, following the car as it rolls to a stop in front of our gate, and then, I'm moving. I grab hold of Sawyer's arm, yanking him back.

He looks at me, stunned.

"Go inside, Sawyer," I rasp.

He frowns and looks back at the car.

"Please," I beg, my eyes darting back to the car. Shit . What the fuck is this?

Sawyer yanks his hand away. "Babe, what the fuck—?"

My father exits the car and the last eight months of my life retreat as if none of it happened and I'm back in Arizona, useless, not good enough. Always one step behind everyone else.

"My father," I whisper.

Sawyer's eyes widen. "Fuck."

"I don't know why he's here. Or how he found me." My eyes move to Sawyer, desperate. "Just . . . just keep Asher inside," I say, moving toward the man now dusting his coat as if he's a henchman coming to collect on behalf of his boss.

"Please, Sawyer. I don't want to cause any more trouble."

He turns to my father, who looks at him with the most awful disdain, then he turns back to me, bends his head and kisses me, and walks back to the house.

I rush down the walkway. "How did you find me?" I demand, feeling all kinds of awful that I'm not offering him a decent greeting. But I have to remember that I'm furious with this man who has tried so hard to ruin Asher's life. Not once, but twice.

He throws his hands up in the air. "It wasn't that hard, Reece. The internet and a few talkative townsfolk is all I needed."

I come to a stop in front of him. "What do you want?"

He shakes his head, turning left and then right, inspecting the place. "Is this how you're living? You sold your house to come live in the fucking forest?"

"This is home now," I spit out.

His face is mocking and horrible, like always. "Home? Reece, this is fucking ridiculous."

"What are you doing here?" I ask.

"I came to talk some sense into you. You're my only child. I can't sit around and watch you make a fool of yourself, firstly. And then act like some kind of lunatic. Exactly how does this whole fucking thing work, Reece? These two men are cheating on each other with you? It's fucking wrong. That's why I called the school district. It's wrong and embarrassing."

"Embarrassing? How is this embarrassing?" I raise my voice to my father. Something I rarely do.

"I have only one fucking kid and this is what he's become?"

It's like the old days all over again. When I was a kid. Too small. Too stupid. Too clingy. Cries too much. I can't stand it. "I'm happy, Dad. Doesn't that count for something?"

"They're using you. They're using you for their sick fucking fantasies. Don't you see that?"

"It's not like that. They care about me." His face contorts at my words, and I fight against the thump in my chest. Somehow, I gather the strength to stand my ground.

"You know what, Dad? I actually don't care about what you think. Nothing I've ever done in my life has ever been good enough for you. You've always accused me of being like my mother, and you know what? Maybe that's fine. Maybe I don't mind being like her. She found the courage to leave you."

My cheeks are wet. Fuck . Stop fucking crying. "I'm happy here. I'm fucking happy. I don't feel like a loser here. Like I was born wrong. No one here tells me I'm stupid. No one tells me I'm weak."

"This is ridiculous." My father runs his hands through his hair. "All I fucking wanted was a fucking son who grew up to be a fucking man."

"Well, Dad. I'm not that guy, I guess. And whatever I am, if you can't accept it, then you need to get out of here and leave me alone."

"You'll regret this."

"I won't. And you flew all the way over here just to tell me all these things. Do you even know what day it is today?"

He glares at me like I'm the sole cause of every bad thing in his life.

"It's Abby's birthday, Dad. My daughter would've been a year old today."

"Yeah, well, you're a man. You're supposed to deal with these things."

I wish I could have. I wish I could've dealt with it like a man. Instead, I drop to my haunches, sobs overtaking me. For Abby. For this – my father who just cannot accept me as I am.