18. Shya

Chapter eighteen

Shya

T oday, Tristan had promised a treat, a surprise, just for me. I couldn't imagine what it might be, but the anticipation had me on edge, my heart racing at the slightest sound. He'd come earlier this morning with a bucket of warm water, lemon soap, and a sponge. I'd waited patiently as he opened the cage and put them just inside the door, with a blanket and a clean yellow floral dress. After he left, I'd washed myself for the first time in weeks.

The warm water was a shock to my skin at first, a sensation almost forgotten. As I dipped the sponge into the bucket and began to scrub, the scent of lemon filled my nostrils. The suds slid over my skin, washing away layers of grime and sweat.

I blinked, marveling at the sight of my own skin, pale and clean, emerging from beneath the dirt. This simple act of washing felt luxurious, decadent even. I savored the feeling of the warm water cascading over my body, the soft caress of the sponge wiping away all that had happened.

I felt lighter, as if the physical act of cleaning had also purged some of the emotional weight I carried. The clean dress, a pretty, delicate thing, felt like a gift against my freshly washed skin.

For the first time in a long time, I felt like me again. Not just a caged animal, but a person. It was a small thing, this act of washing, but it meant the world to me. And Tristan had done this just for me.

I pulled the dress on over my head. It fit perfectly, but I didn't expect anything else; Tristan knew me so well. I ran my hands over the smooth fabric of the dress, enjoying the sensation. I wondered what he would think when he saw me. Would he be pleased? The thought sent a little thrill through me.

I sat down on my blanket, clean and refreshed, and waited patiently for Tristan to return. Whatever surprise he had in store, I was ready. Ready to be good, to be pleasing, to earn my place in his world.

The sound of footsteps outside the tent sent my heart racing once again. I sat up straighter. The tent flap opened, and Tristan ducked inside, carrying a small folding table and two chairs.

"Shya, don't you look beautiful. Like a proper Alpha's mate now."

He smiled at me, and I smiled shyly back at him, happy that he approved, as he set the table and chairs up in the center of the tent, then disappeared outside again.

He returned a moment later with two plates piled high with roasted meat, fresh bread, and ripe berries. It was more food than I'd seen in such a long time, and the aroma made my mouth water. Tristan placed the plates on the table, winked at me, then vanished once more.

When he came back, he held a bouquet of wildflowers in his hand. The sweet scent filled the small space. He laid them gently on the table, then turned to me with a smile.

"For you," he said. "You've been so good, Shya. You've earned yourself a treat today. Come, eat with me."

He unlocked the cage door and held out his hand to me. I took it and stepped out tentatively, my legs unsteady after so long just pacing within the confines of this space. The tent felt vast and overwhelming compared to my cage. I sank into one of the chairs, wondering at the simple comfort of sitting at a table.

Tristan took the seat across from me, the plates of food between us. He gestured for me to eat.

I reached for the food, my hands trembling slightly. It was a feast compared to my usual meals. I wanted to do this right, though. To show Tristan I could behave correctly at a table and make him proud of me. I delicately tore a piece of the bread, savoring the fresh, yeasty smell, then popped it into my mouth and chewed slowly.

As I ate, I couldn't help but steal glances at Tristan. He watched me, a smile playing on his lips. In that moment, everything felt perfect. The food, the flowers, Tristan being here with me.

I knew I would do anything to keep this feeling, to keep Tristan's approval. He was my everything now.

"I've been thinking," I said between mouthfuls, "about what you said. About werewolves and humans. About our future."

Tristan's smile widened. "And?"

I hesitated. "I have some questions. I'm not sure open war is the answer. The risk is so high that our kind will suffer huge losses. Maybe there's another way …"

"Another way?" Tristan scoffed. "Like what?"

"Well, I don't know yet. I was just wondering if there was something else we could do. Some way to change the dynamics between us and humans. A conference with the humans where we renegotiate the terms of the peace? Or a meeting with other Packs to discuss the best way forward? Maybe it will take more time, but this way, there'll be fewer deaths."

Tristan's eyes narrowed. He leaned back in his chair, his posture stiffening. "A conference? Negotiations?" His voice was cold, cutting. "You think they'll listen to us? That they'll treat us as equals? After all this time, bowing at their feet, giving in to their demands? No, we need a show of strength, Shya. That is the only thing they will understand. We need to make sure there is no doubt in their tiny little minds about who is the predator and who is the prey."

I flinched at his tone. "I didn't mean … I just thought …"

"You thought what? That you know better than me?" Tristan stood abruptly, his chair scraping against the ground. "I've been fighting for our kind for years. I've seen what the humans are capable of, what they've taken from us while you've sat in the Alpha House and been pampered. But please, enlighten me with your wisdom."

Tears stung my eyes. I could feel the situation slipping away from me, Tristan's anger a force beating against my mind in time with the chanting that was always there.

"I'm sorry. I didn't … I'm sorry." I bowed my head, my hair falling forward to hide my face.

Stupid, stupid. Why had I questioned him? Why had I ruined this perfect moment?

"I spoke out of turn," I whispered. "It won't happen again. I promise."

Tristan was silent for a long moment. I could hear his breathing, heavy and controlled. Then, slowly, he sat back down.

"Shya, look at me."

I raised my head hesitantly. Tristan's face had softened, but there was still a firmness in the way he looked at me.

"I know you meant well, but you must understand, I know this world better than you. The humans will never see us as equals. They fear us, hate us. They'll never willingly give us what is owed to us. We have to take it."

He reached across the table, taking my hand in his.

"I'm trying to build a better world for us. A world where we don't have to hide, where we can be proud of what we are. But to get there, we have to fight. We have to be strong."

I nodded, swallowing back my tears. "I understand. I'm sorry for doubting you."

Tristan squeezed my hand before releasing it. "I forgive you. Just remember, I know what's best for us. For all of us."

Stay alive, Shya. I'm coming for you.

The words popped into my head, making me frown. The voice was so familiar. Who had said that?

Stay alive, Shya. I'm coming for you.

The words repeated, louder this time. Then the chanting in my head rose to a crescendo.

"Shya?" Tristan looked at me, concern on his face.

I shook my head, clearing my thoughts. "I trust you, Tris. Completely."

And I did. He was my guide, my leader. If he said we had to fight, then that was what we would do.

I would follow him anywhere, do anything he asked. Because he was my going to be my mate.

And his word was law. His expectations were my laws. His desires, my north star.

Without him, I was lost. With him, I was found.