Chapter 16

16

JACKSON

I t should be illegal for a doctor’s office to be so fucking cold. Harper sits on the exam table in sweatpants and my faded hoodie, Honey by his feet staring intently at the door. I know Harper is anxious, but I’m really not worried. His last seizure was almost three months ago now. From everything Harper has told me, that means the new medicine is finally working. I desperately hope the doctor agrees so Harper finally has a semblance of peace.

Dr. Whitman storms into the frigid room with a wide grin. His grin somehow doubles when he notices me. “Who’s this?”

“My bodyguard,” Harper says casually.

Dr. Whitman stares blankly at Harper in confusion. “What for?”

“I stole the Declaration of Independence and now black market thieves are after me.”

Dr. Whitman scoffs with a deep roll of his eyes. “Really, Harper.”

I stand with a smile and offer the doctor my hand. “I’m his boyfriend, Jackson Harris.”

“Oh, lovely to meet you, son. Are you serious?”

“Quite,” I answer with a wide grin.

“Harper Harris has a nice ring,” the doctor points out as he sits on his rolling chair to study Harper’s scans.

Harper’s flush is beautiful and delightful. I move to stand beside him, sweetly taking his hand between both of mine. He aims a tremulous smile toward me, then returns his worried gaze to the doctor’s computer screen.

“Well, it’s good news, Harper.” Dr. Whitman points at the scans with a kind smile towards us. “I don’t see any negative changes in your scans. You’ve had no breakthrough seizures lately?”

Harper shakes his head. “None.”

“Good. I think we might be inching back towards maintenance mode. As always, it’s best to avoid your triggers to avoid a breakthrough seizure. But as long as we’re down to less than two a year, it’s looking up, kiddo. Do you need refills?”

Harper nods quietly, obviously at a loss for words. I smile at the kind doctor, shaking his hand again before he disappears out the door. I help Harper off the exam table and tightly hold his hand as we walk out into the bright winter sunshine. Taking a loud breath, Harper lets it out slowly through his mouth. The tension from this morning is gone, leaving him luminous. I have the inexplicable urge to hold him, kiss him, whisper love sonnets into his ear that would only piss him off.

“I hoped, but I didn’t expect it.”

“Happy?” I ask, tenderly kissing the knuckles of his hand.

“Ecstatic,” Harper replies seriously. His grin is so big and beautiful, that I have to kiss him despite the few people milling around. His fingers tangle in my shirt, tugging me closer. “We should do something disgustingly wintery today. Look at Christmas lights tonight? We can take Honey with us.”

I swipe my finger along his bottom lip, my heart fluttering like hummingbird wings in my chest. If my heart could take flight, soar into the sky, I almost think it would.

“Whatever you want, punk.”

Harper lifts up onto his toes to kiss my nose. “Yay!”

I watch him skip towards the car with Honey hot on his heels. When he notices me lagging behind, he raises one eyebrow in question.

“You coming or what, big guy?”

I basically fly to join him in the car, feeling like forever isn’t that far away now.

Colby’s beach house belongs in architecture magazines. The place is stunning. Not as stunning as the man hopping out of my car, annoyance written all over his face, but it’s close. Harper slams the door behind him, probably hoping to rile me up. But it’s fruitless because Harper’s brand of riling me up usually ends up turning me on. I watch as he pushes into the house without a backward glance, Honey following along like the perfect girl she is.

I grab our shared suitcase from the back of the car with a sigh and trudge inside. The low murmur of voices leads me to the kitchen, where I find Trevor and Harper whispering intensely. Clearing my throat to announce my presence, Harper scowls my way, but a smirk tilts up Trevor’s lips.

“Which bedroom is ours?” I ask, uncaring about Harper’s annoyance.

Eli appears from outside, hair wind tousled. “I’ll show you!”

I leave Trevor and Harper to whisper amongst themselves in the kitchen and dutifully follow Eli up the stairs.

“Bad drive?” Eli asks curiously, fingers skimming along the shiplapped walls.

“Harper wanted to pull over for a quickie and I said no.”

Eli’s snort can probably be heard from space. “You’re diabolically evil.”

“Yes,” I agree, dropping our suitcase on the floor by the bed. “Harper would agree.”

The bedroom faces the ocean where turquoise waves roll against the shore. The light blue, cloud-free sky stretches beyond the horizon. One would almost think it’s still hot with the way the sun beats down on the fine white sand. But it’s been a cool December in Florida, meaning it’s perfect shorts weather without the oppressive humidity or sweltering heat. My mind drifts back to the last time I had Harper at the beach, those magical nights in the tent. Sweet and sassy, I’ll get Harper back in my good graces soon enough.

“Well, he’ll get over it.” Eli stands in front of the windows, hands on his hips. “Colby asked me to marry him.”

“Oh?” Clearly, Eli is oblivious if he thought that wasn’t coming.

“Yes.”

“Well?”

Eli turns towards me with a wide grin. “I said yes.”

“Of course.”

Eli wiggles his fingers towards the door. “When are you planning on nailing that down?”

“Harper is too wily to ask now and he’d probably say no anyway. Who am I kidding… he might say no in twenty years. I’m biding my time. When the time is right, I’ll know.”

“Jackson,” Eli says my name seriously, eyes squinted as he takes me in. “That man would never say no. It’s all in the approach.”

I grunt in agreement. Just as Eli leaves the bedroom, Harper wanders in, hands on his hips. Harper peruses the room for bombs, bugs, or something out of place that he can be annoyed with. Finding nothing, he heads over to the windows to stare out at the waves.

“Is the room to your liking, my liege?”

Harper aims a death glare at me over his shoulder. “Shut up.”

I chuckle darkly and move to join him at the window. My prickly prince. Harper sighs happily as I wrap him in my arms, pulling him as close to my body as possible. He turns his head to press a kiss to my jaw, his form of apology for the brattiness of the past hour. But he doesn’t need to apologize and he should know that by now. I love his brattiness, makes it feel so earned when he’s sweet in my arms.

“Sorry,” Harper whispers, almost low enough that I can’t hear the word.

“You’re fine.”

I gently wrap my fingers around his jaw, lifting him up so that I can plunder his mouth. Our tongues fight for dominance for one brief second before Harper gives in and allows me to lead, per usual. Harper melts back in my arms as I eat at his mouth, doing my best to calm his nerves about the weekend stay with his family. Riled up and annoyed, I know it’s because he’s nervous about the beach stay, nervous that something will go wrong.

“Okay?” I ask against his slack mouth.

Harper just hums and leans heavier against me, the clearest sign that I’ve succeeded in relaxing him. “The water’s too cold to swim in.”

“Yes, probably.”

“Can you bring me to the beach at least once when I can swim?”

Swimming is on Harper’s only if you’re with me list. If he’s asking, then I know it’s a pretty big wish for him. I’ll have to take him somewhere warm and tropical this upcoming summer. Some place where I have to put a lot of sunscreen on him to keep him from burning.

“Sure,” I agree, already thinking up plans.

“Take a walk with me?”

The house is mostly empty as we leave, minus Joey and Lee standing in the kitchen, having what looks like a very intense conversation. Small dunes line the side of the pathway towards the water, impeding my ability to see down the beach until we reach the other side. Colby stands in the water up to his ankles with Eli clinging to his back like a barnacle. A little down the beach stands Trevor and Beau, looking intently down at the sand with twin curious faces. Seems like a better bet.

I tug Harper after me towards Trevor and Beau. As we approach, Beau crouches down with a very serious look on his face.

“Is it a shark?” Harper asks seriously.

“A microscopic shark?” Trevor replies, face devoid of humor.

“Yes, possibly.” Harper lifts his chin. “I heard about them on TikTok.”

“Oh brother,” I mutter under my breath. Harper elbows my ribs with a scowl.

“No, look.” Beau points at the sand, brushing some of it away to reveal the dried skeleton of a seahorse.

Harper howls with laughter, earning him a slightly startled look from Beau and Trevor. His fingers come up to cover his mouth as he holds in more laughter. The answering grin on my lips is borderline painful. Beau carefully brushes the remaining sand away from the seahorse as if it’s the most precious thing on earth. Standing to his full height, he presents it to Trevor with a shy smile.

“For you, sweetheart.”

Trevor takes the gift with a tender, tremulous smile. “Thank you, Beau.”

“Nauseating,” Harper mutters.

With a smile at Trevor and Beau, I tug Harper towards the empty beach in front of us. Harper sighs with pleasure when I wrap my arm around his shoulder, tugging him close against me as we walk. We leave footprints in the sand behind us, proof that we exist. Harper pulls away from me to dip his toes in the water. It lasts approximately one second before he comes running back.

“Water is freezing,” Harper says, tucking his arm around my waist, under my shirt.

“No shit.”

Harper pinches my side hard. “I had to see for myself.”

The world is hushed around us as we walk the length of the beach. Every now and then we dip down to pick up a shell, and Harper’s smile is so genuine that my heart aches at the sight of it. By the time we return back to the house, I’ve got twenty sandy shells stuffed in the pockets of my jeans.

Colby stands on the raised back porch, wearing an easy grin while grilling lunch for everyone. Through the windows Trevor and Beau are visible puttering around in the kitchen, probably preparing sides for our lunch. Weird, awkward tensions crackles through the air when we take a seat at the outdoor dining table.

Eli kicks my leg under the table, trying and succeeding to get my attention. “Benji called. That’s why Trevor went inside with Beau.”

Oh shit. I press a kiss to Harper’s cheek and power walk into the house. Trevor stands in the kitchen, face pinched, with his phone to his ear. At the sight of me, he relaxes just enough for me to know my presence is needed. Beau’s eyes glance at me as he chops lettuce, slowly dumping it into a large serving bowl.

“They’ve been talking for about fifteen minutes,” Beau tells me, lips downturned. “Only hearin’ one side of the conversation has me pretty concerned though.”

Trevor paces the length of the kitchen now, lip caught between his teeth as he tears dry skin from his lip. Oh, this isn’t good at all. Trevor is cool and calm, never riled up. When I reach my arm out, hand palm up, Trevor violently shakes his head.

“I hear you, Benji. But I also don’t think you’re capable of handling this by yourself. I really think you need to talk to Claire.” Trevor listens patiently, lip still caught between his teeth. His eyes go wide and he attempts to sidestep me, but I grab his forearm to stop him. “Jackson’s here. He wants to talk to you.”

The minute the phone is in my hand, I lift it to my ear. “Are you safe? Did he hurt you?”

“No, no, Jackson,” Benji whispers, voice barely audible. “I’m fine.”

“You’ve got Trevor pretty worried.”

Trevor makes a frantic cutting motion with his hand.

“Tell me what’s going on,” I demand, leaving no room for argument.

Benji blows out a shaky breath that rattles across the phone. “I’m fine. I promise. Tell Trevor to chill. I just needed… I needed someone to know.”

“Know what?”

“That I’m in way over my head.”

Benji hangs up just as the sound of a guitar filters through the phone.

“What did he tell you,” I ask Trevor, handing him back his phone.

Trevor’s worried gaze flits from me to Beau, then back to me. “He just knew I had the most experience with Nolan. Wanted to fill me in on a situation.”

“And that situation is…” I trail off, rolling my hand to indicate he needs to spill the beans.

“Nolan has certain proclivities.”

I blink slowly. “I’m very aware.”

Trevor blinks back with an attitude. “Benji is just a little out of his depth. I think he should come home… to Clay Springs. He needs us. Nolan will just have to understand.”

The way Trevor speaks makes it clear that he’s done with the conversation. I don’t blame him. Trevor wanders over towards Beau to lean heavily against his side, needing the comfort of his boyfriend after the last few minutes. Beau smiles softly and presses a kiss to the top of Trevor’s head.

Something about Benji’s tone sets me on edge. After so many years around each other, it’s easy for us to read each other just by our tones. Trevor’s tone goes flat, devoid of all emotion when he’s worried or anxious. Eli gets this little divot between his brows that shows off his panic. Whereas Benji goes into I’m going to fix everything mode. I can’t worry about what I can’t control though. If Benji needs us, he knows where we are, and he’ll come to us. When he’s ready.

I return back outside to take my seat beside Harper. When he aims a questioning gaze towards me, I just slip my hand into his under the table, squeezing tight to reassure him all is fine. Because he’s perfect, because he’s mine, he takes it for what it is, not feeling the need to press me.

It ends up being the quietest New Year’s Eve of my life. No big party, nothing over the top. Just friends beside the ocean. Everyone is cuddled up in the living room as midnight approaches, but I have better plans.

“Hey, Harper?” I whisper against the shell of Harper’s ear.

Harper turns to me with a dramatic roll of his eyes. “Yes, Jackson?”

I wiggle my eyebrows at him. “Wanna start the new year in style?”

A few beats pass as Harper stares at me. “Are we going to play naked Twister?”

I dip my fingers into the neck of his sweater, trailing my fingers along the warm skin along the top of his spine. Because Harper’s perpetually a little shit, he shivers at my touch but does his best to stay cool, calm, and collected. But he’s a duck. Calm on the surface, paddling those little feet quickly beneath the still waters.

“I was thinking maybe we’d ring the New Year in with my face between your thighs.”

Splotches of crimson dot Harper’s checks, and he scowls. “My family is sitting right over there,” he hisses.

“They can’t hear me,” I reassure him because I checked that their attention was elsewhere. Embarrassing Harper is never in the cards with me.

“Well, you owe me now.”

I arch an eyebrow. “Oh, do I?”

He sniffs haughtily. “Yes.”

My eyes flit around the room, clocking the other occupants. Trevor and Beau sit at the kitchen table with a puzzle, close enough to be touching, but far enough apart to make their activity beyond innocent. Eli’s at the piano, Colby behind him teaching him to play the keys softly, twin grins on their faces. And outside in the dark night watching the waves are Joey and Lee, curiously Joey has a hand splayed over the small of Lee’s back. That’s interesting and new. I don’t have time to give a shit though.

I hurriedly stand from the sofa, grab Harper by the hips, and toss him over my shoulder in a fireman’s carry.

“Jackson!” Harper screeches, laughter clear in his voice.

Everyone turns to look at us. Oops. “Bedtime for Harper. Happy New Year!”

Eli’s laughter follows us as I stomp up the stairs, Harper hanging limply over my shoulder. Glancing at my watch, I gently pat Harper’s ass as we enter the bedroom. Thirty minutes of edging before we ring in the New Year. Perfect.

A mouthful of fur on New Year’s Day is not the way I imagined starting off the new year. Blinking my eyes open, I squint as I inspect the bed for Harper. One hand curled under the pillow, the other reaching out for my hand, his lips still parted with sleep. I’d edged him forever last night until he threatened to murder me if I didn’t make him come at that exact moment.

Unafraid of his fury, I’d held off for a couple more minutes, earning me that coveted cry of Daddy when he finally came. As quietly as I can, I carry a still-half-asleep Honey out to the backyard of the beach house. She stares up at me in abject confusion for a moment, before yawning and doing her business. In the kitchen, I quietly make two cups of hot chocolate for me and Harper, then fill Honey’s dog bowl with food. The entire house is quiet, everyone is sound asleep from a raucous night celebrating New Year’s.

Satisfied we’ll get a few dog-free moments now, I return to the bedroom with the steaming mugs of hot chocolate. Harper is leaning up on his elbows, sleepy eyes blinking at me. He makes grabby hands for the steaming mug. I chuckle and hand him the mug, setting mine down on the nightstand to join him in the bed. He lets out a blissful sigh when he drinks a few sips, then also rests his mug on the nightstand.

I lie down on the bed, hands tucked under my face. Harper mimics me with a teasing grin.

“Happy New Year,” Harper says, voice still gravelly.

“I think we celebrated early this morning.”

Harper bites his lip. “That we did.”

I hook my finger in the band of his sweatpants, tugging him closer until we’re nose to nose. “I’ve got a question for you.”

Up close Harper’s eyes are sea-glass green, with little flecks of yellow around the edges. The most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen. His fingers sneak under my shirt, cold against my overheated skin, but they warm the longer he rests them there.

“I might have an answer.”

Typical. I press a soft kiss to his jaw, hiding my grin in his hair. “What would you think about me moving in with you?”

Harper’s fingers pause in their restless exploration of the small of my back. His fingers tap against my back a few times, before picking back up where they left off. He lets out a little puff of air against my head.

“Did you just invite yourself to live with me?”

I kiss his ear and splay my hand against the curve of his ass. “Maybe.”

“I have some conditions.”

I pull back to look at him. “Let me hear it.”

He squints at me, seeing what he can get away with. “You’ll cook dinner every night.”

“Done.”

“And you’ll do the dishes.”

Easy. “Done.”

“We’ll play basketball whenever we want to argue.”

I swallow roughly. “Okay.”

Harper turns his head to kiss my bicep, fluttering his eyes at me. “You’ll take a bubble bath with me once a week.”

“Jeez, Harper. Do you have any tough requests?”

His chin trembles just a little, eyes going uncharacteristically misty. “You’ll love me forever?”

I roll us over so I hover over him, caging him between my arms. He relaxes under my kiss, still-sleep-warm mouth tasting like mine. When I pull away to kiss his brow, there’s a dreamy grin on his upturned lips. That’s also mine. Everything about Harper is mine.

“I’ll love you forever and a day, punk.”

Harper thoughtfully taps his chin with one elegant finger. “You can move in, then.”

I kiss him again until he’s laughing beneath me. When he tries to pull away, I refuse to let him. Instead, I hold him close because he’s mine to keep, mine to kiss, and just flat-out mine . He came out of nowhere and lit my life up. Forever never sounded so sweet.