18. Beautiful people

18

BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE

O nce Damek leaves, I try hard not to think about what his mom said about me, but I can't help it.

I know that what she said was a lie. I know that she was being petty and was probably just jealous because she thinks I'm ‘stealing' her son or something. But the words are so familiar. They're the same words I've heard almost my entire life. Over and over again I've been told how ‘ugly' I am. How ‘less' I am. I had nearly forgotten about it when I came here. I've been accepted and loved. But not being accepted by Queen Rune doesn't change who I am.

I'm a hybrid. I'm a mix of two species, not belonging to either.

I sob into my pillow. It's way too early to be in bed. I told everybody that I was ‘tired' from hanging out with our company, but the truth is, I just didn't want to be around anybody. I want to break by myself.

Damke's mom hates me. Which sucks because he's the only guy I would consider for the alliance. He's the only guy that I like—the only one I'm truly attracted to.

A knock on my door disrupts me. I take a deep breath before calling out.

"Who is it?" My voice breaks slightly at the end. I take another breath and swallow my sobs.

"It's Kaine. Can we talk?"

My shoulders slump forward.

Of course it's Kaine. He's probably here to rub my nose in my misery.

"Now isn't a good time," I manage to say before another sob escapes my throat. I hate that vampire hearing is so good. I know he can hear me. It's embarrassing to break down in front of somebody who hates me like this, but I try to keep my spirits high. It's not my fault that I'm a hybrid. And it's not my fault that Damek's mother hates me. I can't change who I am. The only thing I can do is try to prove everybody wrong.

The doorknob jingles as Kaine opens it. He walks through, shutting the door behind him.

I wipe my face. "Kaine, I don't want you here right now. Please leave."

He doesn't even attempt to leave though. Instead, he steps closer to my bed. "What's wrong?"

I sniff. "Nothing."

He raises an eyebrow. "You wouldn't be crying in your room if it were truly nothing."

"I don't need you making fun of me," I tell him. "I don't want you telling me that you were right. I just…" my voice breaks, "I just want to be alone."

He sighs, stepping forward again. He doesn't stop until he's right beside my bed. I wonder what he's doing when he takes a seat on the edge of my bed. "I heard what happened tonight."

I wipe my face. "So you wanted to come tell me that you agree with Queen Rune and her assessment of me?"

He levels me with his gaze. "I would never take her side over yours."

I sit up so that I can face him. "Because I'm currently heir to the Scott Clan throne?"

Kaine shakes his head. "No. Because I know you. I've spent the past six weeks training you and in that time I've gotten to know you. You have a good heart."

"My heart wasn't in question." I bite my lip and look down at my lap. I knit my fingers together, wanting something to do with them. I've never felt so exposed before.

"Madeline," Kaine says.

At the sound of my name, I look up.

He called me Madeline . Not Princess Madeline. Not Princess Scott. But Madeline. Which means that he's not here as my advisor or as a favor to my father. He's here as my friend. And I'm not quite sure what to make of it.

"She was lying," he says simply. "You know that, right?"

I shrug one shoulder. "I know that in theory. But the other part of me is reliving every single time my cousins told me I was ugly. You can't even imagine how horrible it is to grow up in a family surrounded by beautiful people. I was the ugly duckling. The scar on the otherwise perfect family line."

Kaine sighs, running his fingers through his hair. "I wish you could understand just how absurd what you're saying is. You're not ugly, Madeline. You're beautiful. Sometimes, it hurts to even look at you, you're that gorgeous."

My breath gets caught in my throat.

He looks away. "It's part of the reason I hated you so much when you first came. I knew that you didn't have anything to do with Lucien's disappearance. I've always known. But when I saw you for the first time, I knew that there was a possibility I could develop a crush on you or even fall for you. And no matter how beautiful and nice you are, I knew you could never be mine. You're not mine to keep. So I was rude to you and I pushed you away. I didn't do it for you. I did it for me. Because you have the ability to annihilate me."

My heart thumps a little faster at his proclamation.

Kaine thinks I'm beautiful.

And more than thinking I'm beautiful, he likes me.

My brain is in overdrive as I process what he's telling me.

Does Kaine really think so highly of me?

I lick my lips and dare to meet his glacier blue eyes. "Thank you."

He raises an eyebrow. "For what?"

"Take your pick." I scoot closer to him. "Thank you for coming in here tonight and telling me that. I know it can't have been easy to say. Thank you for being rude to me because if you hadn't been rude I probably would've fallen for you the first day I met you. Don't let it go to your head, but you're beautiful too."

He shakes his head. "You don't have to compliment me. I didn't say all that to get you to say nice things to me."

"I'm not just trying to be nice." I put my hand on his forearm. "To be honest, it wouldn't take much for me to fall in love with somebody. I've wanted love my whole life. I had it from my mom, but I've missed it from my dad. And, even though I'm twenty three, I've never had a boyfriend. I'm always trying to convince myself that I like being single and I am thankful for the time I've had to figure out who I am, but I want a boyfriend. I want a husband and a family. I want to be loved. So, that's why it's good you weren't nice to me. Because I probably would have had a major crush on you and I would've been very disappointed when I learned I had to choose a royal as a husband."

He chuckles darkly, shaking his head. "You're ridiculous, you know that?"

"I'm telling you the truth right now." I scoot slightly closer until my thigh touches his. "So… what am I supposed to do about Queen Rune?"

He rubs a hand on the back of his head, taking a deep breath. "I'll figure out something. We can discuss it at work tomorrow."

I groan, covering my face with the crook of my elbow.

I have a feeling no matter how much we discuss the issue and Kaine schools me, Queen Rune will never like me. I'll never be good enough for her stepson.

"Did you know she was once human?" I ask Kaine, removing my elbow so I can look at him. "I didn't realize humans could be so cruel."

"You don't know many humans then." He gives me the side eye. "I may have been young when I was turned, but I knew just how cruel humans could be. They can be just as cruel as any supernatural."

His words surprise me.

I knew that humans could be cruel, I had just never witnessed it firsthand. Being a supernatural, humans are naturally drawn to me. They go out of their way to be kind.

Kaine pats me on the arm and then stands up from the bed. "I better go so you can get some rest. We'll start early tomorrow and figure out a plan. And we need to narrow down your marriage candidates."

"Maybe you could stay a little longer." Tears well up in my eyes again, almost without my permission. "I don't want to be alone just yet."

He reluctantly steps closer to the bed. "I don't know, Princess Madeline."

Princess .

There's that stupid title again.

I scoot up my bed, resting my back against the headboard. I pat the spot beside me. "Come on. Distract me from my misery."

He sits down slowly like he's trying to be cautious.

I lift an eyebrow at him. "What? Are you scared I'm going to try and ravish you now that you know I think you're hot?"

He coughs for a few prolonged seconds. " Madeline ," he scolds.

My lips tip upward. "That's much better. You don't have to call me ‘Princess' anymore. I don't like the title."

"I am your advisor—I have to call you princess in public. If I didn't, even your father would object. It would imply that we have more of a relationship than we actually have." He narrows his eyes. "I also shouldn't be in your bedroom right now."

"Who will know?" I offer him a smile. "I won't tell if you won't."

"And will you please never use the word ravish when referring to you and me? Because if anybody overheard you, they would get the very wrong idea about us," Kaine says, continuing like I didn't speak. "Honestly, I have no idea how I'm going to survive being your advisor."

"Cheer up." I link my arm through his.

He makes a choking sound of disproval, but I ignore it.

I scoot a little closer to him. "You're my distraction. So what do you want to do?"

He narrows his eyes. "You're the one who is practically forcing me to be here. What do you want me to do?"

I tap my chin, deciding it might be fun to mess with him a little more. "We could always make out."

His expression goes completely blank as he looks at me. " Princess Madeline." His tone is darker than I've ever heard, but the displeasure is clear.

I chuckle, shaking my head. "Am I not allowed to joke with you?"

"No," he insists. "Because you weren't joking—you were flirting. And I've already told you, I am not an option. Your father needs allies. The clan needs allies. And it's your duty as a princess to marry a royal."

I sigh. "You're no fun, Kaine."

"I'm not supposed to be fun," he says. "For the thousandth time, I'm your advisor."

The next evening, when I see Julien at breakfast, he's got a smug expression on his face—one that I can read all too well. He's got something he wants to tease me about. But what could I have possibly done to deserve the ribbing from him?

I find out, once he gets me alone.

"You and Kaine looked cozy last night."

I cross my arms over my chest. "What are you talking about?"

One side of his lips turns up in the corner. "I saw the two of you cuddling in your bed last night."

I roll my eyes. "Oh, please. We were just talking. After everything that happened with Queen Rune last night, he was just consoling me."

Julien frowns. "She was a real jerk. You know what she said wasn't true, right?"

I nod, chewing on my bottom lip. "I know in theory."

Julien puts his hands on my shoulders. "I know that I joke about how you're beautiful because I'm beautiful and we look alike. But, Maddie, I'm not joking. You are beautiful. I know it. Prince Damek knows it. Heck, even Queen Rune knows it. She's probably just jealous because the queen that eventually takes her place will be far more beautiful than she's ever dreamt of being."

My heart swells. "Julien."

He gives me a look. "I'm serious. Don't try to argue. Just accept the compliment. I love you, Maddie."

"I love you, too." I lean into him and he wraps his arms around me.

I never knew what I was missing out on by being an only child. Having Julien by my side is the best. I just hope we can find Lucien so I can get to know him too.

"You know, you could always just ditch Prince Damek and marry Kaine," Julien teases.

I pull back to look at him. "First of all, no I can't. I have to marry a royal. Second, Kaine would never agree to that. He's way too dedicated to his role to consider something like that. His duty comes first."

Julien's grin widens. "It sounds like you've given this some thought."

I scoff. "We're not having the discussion right now. It's Kaine we're talking about."

He furrows his brows. "You know that I'm a vampire, right?"

"So?"

"So…" he gives me an amused look. "I happened to be in the hallway when Kaine was giving you his speech about you being beautiful."

My cheeks grow warm. "Oh."

"Never mind the fact that you called him hot." Julien's smirk grows into a full grin. "If you decide to run away and marry your advisor, I want you to know that I'm a supportive brother. Also, invite me to the wedding."

I gently shove his shoulder. "I'm not marrying Kaine. He'd probably completely freak out if he heard you talking like that. It's not like that with us. He was just trying to help me feel better after what Queen Rune said. Besides, in case you've forgotten, the guy is helping me choose a husband."

"Oh, I remember." He wiggles his eyebrows. "Maybe name your firstborn after me."

I roll my eyes again. "You're annoying."

"Yet, you still love me."