Chapter Twelve

L ord Tobias Moran

I closed the outer door of Ashton’s family home and waited to hear the lock click before leaving. I had been the only man in attendance for dinner. His mother, Connie enjoyed wine, and she and I polished off a decanter of excellent French Bordeaux.

Like Ash, his father and brothers were at work. Although I had faith in Ash’s abilities, ever since he’d been promoted to inspector, I worried about him investigating dangerous criminals who weren’t afraid to kill someone. While it was cold outside with a heavy fog, I was quite warm from my hearty meal and enjoyable wine. A man came out of the shadows, and I stopped, my hand going to my pocket where a small pistol rested. A familiar figure emerged, and I relaxed my hand. Ash. “You are home late.”

Ash emerged more clearly into view, his shoulders hunched in his greatcoat. He smiled at me and nodded. “You’re here awfully late as well.”

“Indeed, your mother and I indulged in some wine and several games of whist, and I am ashamed to say that she cleaned out my pockets.”

He shook his head, coming closer. “When will you learn?”

“Apparently never.” The sight of him sparked my blood. I’d tried to wean myself off him, but I was randy, and wanted satisfaction without strings attached. “Speaking of which, would you like to come over for a, um, nightcap?”

He angled his head and looked down his nose at me, eyes widened in surprise. “I thought you were done with nightcaps?”

“Apparently, I was wrong about that as well.” He fell into step beside me as I walked, giving me my answer. “My hand is rather tired of all the fucking it that has been put through lately.”

His laughter rang through the streets, our footsteps echoing on the cobbles. Despite our mild flirtation, I was aware of my surroundings. Having grown up in this neighborhood after being sequestered in the lap of luxury at the ducal estates, I learned the hard way that a man must watch his purse—and his life—because they could disappear in a matter of seconds.

“I can assist with that,” Ash said in a husky whisper that spoke of his desire.

He and I walked in companionable silence, neither one feeling the need to fill the void with small talk. We turned the corner and entered the alley which led to my back stairwell. Earlier that morning, Mrs. Worth came up the same stairwell and caught me half-clothed. Since then, I had been in a heightened state and wanted to take the edge off.

I withdrew the key from my pocket and put it into the lock. My body hummed with anticipation of what was to come. Throughout the years, Ash and I had a relationship that worked for both of us. Granted, what we wanted out of life was a family, thus, no matter what happened tonight, it wasn’t sustainable.

The hallway was quiet as we entered. Mrs. Paul and her children lived in a flat close by. The building was my own, and I was proud that I had purchased it with the hard-earned money I received from the Ambrosia line.

I turned my head in time to see Ash close the door. With heated eyes, he pulled me into his body, and our lips caught in a deep kiss filled with longing. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, my fingers digging into his hair as I tilted my head and dipped my tongue between his lips. Our couplings were often raw and full of passion but rarely gentle.

He pulled back, his breath coming in harsh inhales. “You weren’t kidding, you are indeed ready for more.”

In response, I ran up the stairs, eager to get things started. I spent way too much time by myself and didn’t wish to stay in a dark place. My flat was on the top floor, and I opened the door, the smell of books and parchment pervasive. It was my favorite smell in the world, second only to Ash’s passions and now it would seem, Mrs. Worth’s perfume. Once again, I was thinking about her and didn’t want to. The flat didn’t have the ornate décor of most homes, instead, a utilitarian couch faced two wingback chairs before the coal fireplace. I had a small cook stove in the corner and one room for my bedroom.

I began to shed my clothes, and glancing over my shoulder, spied Ash doing the same thing. “We missed you at dinner. Were you on a case?” I asked, throwing my coat onto a chair.

“I don’t wish to talk about work right now. I have other things to occupy me at the moment.” Ash finished removing his trousers, his cock standing at attention, waiting for me.

With a grin, I started the phonograph, music drifting into the air heavy with anticipation. Although I lived alone, the building was accessible to others. Ash was a vocal lover thus it was added protection against prying ears. I moved into the bedroom, stripping off the rest of my clothing as I stood next to the large, blue-curtained bed. He approached, a familiar gleam in his eye, and our lips collided once more. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders, his hand on my lower back, pressing my body into his. His satiny smooth cock lay against mine between our bellies. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to bugger him or suck his cock. However, buggering was rather intimate, and I was trying to refrain from such intimacies with Ash.

His tongue dipped into my mouth, and I fisted his hair, my tongue dueling with his. Hunger drove me and nothing else.

He withdrew from our kiss and rested his forehead against mine. Both of us were breathing heavily, and I had difficulty catching my breath. “I assume you still keep condoms in the bedside drawer?”

“I don’t think that is wise. We had an agreement, and I don’t want to be intimate in any way except to bring each other mutual satisfaction. I think it’s better that way.” Every word pained me, but it was necessary to maintain our agreement.

Ash tilted his chin and brought his lips to mine, this time with more gentleness. He read me so well that I hated putting him at arm’s length. “I am perfectly happy with cock-sucking.”

“I’m pleased that you are because I can’t wait to suck your cock. Shall we?” I nudged my head toward the bed. Grinning, we both fell sideways, laughing as we bounced on the mattress. My love for him swelled, and had circumstances been different, we would stay like this forever. However, we both wanted a traditional household and would remain friends.

Elizabeth breaking our engagement was a minor setback. Ash’s mother was after me to meet a dressmaker who owned her own shop. I would ask her to set up the meeting tomorrow, and if all went well, I might meet my future wife. Except Mrs. Worth popped into my mind, and I tried to scrub her image away.

“Why are you scowling?” Rolling me onto my back, his mouth sought mine once more. He straddled my hips, his weight pushing me down. Although we were of similar height, he was more heavily built. He never tried to overpower me, nor would I have let him.

“Habit, I suppose.” I might not be as bulky but I was scrappy.

“Then I will wipe the scowl off your face and replace it with a more agreeable expression.” Strong fingers skimmed down my side, his thumb brushing against my nipple as he began to roll it between his fingertips. I wrapped my arm around his neck, drawing his face closer to mine. “How about lust?”

“Lust is good.” Although I said I wouldn’t bugger him, kissing him was equally dangerous. If I lived to be a hundred years old, I would never be able to forgo his kisses.

With an impertinent smile, he dipped his head and began to trail his mouth along the underside of my jaw. I stared up at the ceiling, my body craving his touch. Denying myself physical contact had been the height of foolishness. He moved his lips down my neck, placing kisses every few inches along the way. I licked my lips, waiting in anticipation as his mouth finally landed on my nipple. A groan escaped me at the suction. He paid homage to my other side, and I massaged the back of his neck. He was giving me no quarter, and each kiss pressed against my belly made me ache all over in a delicious manner.

He lifted my cock, his mouth licking a path around the crown. Another moan escaped me, and I was unsure why I tried to suppress them. Nobody was in the building but Ash and me. Still, I couldn’t completely throw caution to the wind; there would be hell to pay if we were caught. My uncle Nigel had already disowned me, but if I shamed the name of Moreland, he would see me deported or worse. Ash positioned my cock on my belly and began to run his tongue up and down my shaft, starting with my ballocks and working his way up. He performed the motion over and over again, each lick adding to my ever-growing need. I held out, wanting everything I could have with him. He took my cock into his mouth once more, his throat a velvety sheath around it.

“I want to suck your cock as well. Let’s change positions,” I said.

“You will get no argument from me.” His eyes were a vibrant blue when he lifted his head. He leaned over me for a heated second and caught my mouth once more, his lips coated with the taste of my body. In the past, I would have sunk deep into his center and lost myself in his heat. Tonight, we would simply satisfy each other.

Ash climbed off me and settled his hips next to my head. I rolled to my side and took his shaft in my hand. There was a glistening bead of excitement on the crown, and I licked it off, using my tongue to drift down his length. He jerked under my touch, and I knew exactly what he wanted.

Wetting my finger, I inserted it into his tight center. His eyelids raised before lowering again, a satisfying groan issuing from him. He did the same thing to me and I almost lost it then and there. I missed him so much, yet holding onto the past wasn’t conducive to the future. I had to keep reminding myself of that.

My desire for him was real. After he confessed his love for Suzette, I panicked and proposed to Elizabeth in what I realized, in hindsight, was desperation. While I hadn’t loved Elizabeth, she could give me a family, something I had been deprived of. Ash wanted the same but we couldn’t give that to each other. Prolonging our affair only made it worse. Yet I wanted him tonight more than I wanted air. Tomorrow, I might feel remorse, but right now I wanted to lose myself in desire’s embrace.