7. Adrianna

ADRIANNA

His fingers wrap around my upper arm, denying me the embarrassing fall that was likely coming. It would have been mortifying, but at least it would have put some space between us. Deep-blue inquisitive eyes search mine as we stare at one another before I come to my senses and try to take a step back.

His eyes narrow, but his hold relents, and I take a larger-than-necessary step back.

"Hey, I was hoping to find you," he breathes, tipping the corner of his mouth up, and I shake my head.

"I can't say the same," I mutter, not waiting around as I start down the path away from the fae building. I sense him hot on my tail, and as he goes to grab my arm again, I turn my deathly glare his way.

"Hey," he protests, lifting his hand away quickly, raising it in surrender. It takes a few moments for calmness to settle back over me and for the anger burning in my eyes to dissolve.

I'm acutely aware that he's not technically the target of my pent-up emotions, but he has a connection to it all and that seems to be enough to put him in the line of fire. "Go away, Brody."

He pouts like a toddler preparing for an almighty tantrum. "But I come in peace."

In peace? He doesn't know the meaning of the word. Why is he even out here?

Wait…

"Was the rose from you?" I blurt, folding my arms over my chest as I narrow my eyes at him.

His head rears back, his brows knitting together as he subtly shakes his head. "Rose?"

It definitely wasn't him. He'd be boasting about it if it was.

"Nevermind," I grumble, turning away from him before setting off on my run.

Despite his close proximity and my desire to put distance between us, I keep to a jogging pace, not wanting to injure myself when I don't know what awaits me behind any turn. Between the up-and-coming challenges from the academy and whatever else Kenner may throw my way, I need to be alert. Losing my shit over some guy being near me while I'm out for a run is a waste of stress and energy. Especially if he's not actually causing me any harm.

Which he isn't…yet.

Deep down, I know I'm not really surprised when he falls into step with me. His footsteps are in sync with mine as we keep pace, our arms moving at our sides, but to my shock, his mouth remains shut.

Peering at him from the corner of my eye, I consider his threat levels and come up blank. As we round the fountain focal point and head off toward the outer perimeter, I can't help but break the silence.

"I don't need company, Brody." He doesn't respond, which makes me frown, forcing me to turn and look at him. He offers me a full-blown smile and a wink, getting under my skin in a way only he seems to be able to. "What?" He presses his finger to his lips, making my eyes narrow further. "You're giving me a headache."

"I haven't said a word," he blurts, gaping at me.

"Exactly," I grumble, shaking my head to try and rid the growing tension.

He's persistent and slightly annoying, but if I pretend he's not there, it will all be fine. With my mind made up, I take a deep breath and focus on my rhythm. He remains silently at my side as we cover the grounds of the academy, and I manage to run without him being a distraction.

As we round the bend and the forest comes into view, I feel somewhat lighter and a little less stressed as the world brightens up around me. Out here, with nature, I can sometimes find more perspective, and now that my mind is clearing, I can focus on everything that's happened in the past twenty-four hours. My only issue is figuring out where to even begin with it all.

Our pace naturally slows as we move between the trees, the familiar fallen log reminding me of the memories I already have out here, even though we haven't been on campus very long. As we near the spot where my jogging companion fucked me, he comes to a stop altogether. Much to my irritation, I slow beside him.

I'm a sucker.

A true fucking sucker.

He turns to me, his hands firmly on his hips, as his head tilts ever so slightly to the side. "Last night was a lot, even for me as a spectator. I can't imagine how it was for you in comparison, and I guess I just don't like the idea of you being alone right now."

I frown at him as he waves a hand between us, attempting to explain why he's running with me. "I can handle myself just fine." It's all I can muster. I'm the one who takes care of others, not the other way around, and I can't say I feel comfortable with it.

"I'm not doubting it."

Now that we've come to a complete stop, the familiar ache runs over my limbs, so I stretch my arms and legs as I work on my breathing, hoping we can fall back into comfortable silence since he's made it clear he's not leaving.

Any hopes I had are shattered as he takes a step toward me. "What was the hardest part?"

My heart flutters, just once, as my chest clenches. That's some deep shit right there. I don't know if I want to even venture into that territory by myself, let alone in a conversation with someone else.

"Of what?"

My attempt at playing dumb falls flat when he cocks a brow at me. "Of last night."

I shake my head despite two initial thoughts coming to mind. One thing I know for certain is Cassian had no idea.

Not. A. Single. One.

The hold he had on my waist was laced with panic, uncertainty, and distress. He was as much in the dark as I was.

Learning who I am is no surprise to me, and I knew it would happen one day, so as much as my secret is out there in some capacity, it doesn't scare me as much as other things do.

The two things it comes down to are threaded with so much horror and uncertainty, I don't know where to begin.

My mother and Kenner.

Simple words, yet they carry so much weight. My nightmare is just the tip of the iceberg.

"I can sense your mind going a mile a minute, but you're not sharing," Brody murmurs, breaking my train of thought.

I clear my throat, looking off into the distance for a second before turning back to him. "Just because you're asking questions doesn't mean I have to answer them."

Disappointment flickers in his blue eyes with a hint of sadness. My mind comes alive, my magic fluttering between us despite my better judgment, revealing the genuine feelings behind his questions and actions.

Fuck.

Quickly pulling my magic in, I sigh. "I think you learned some things about me last night that should explain why I'm not into this whole talking shit," I state, and he offers me a weak smile.

Without a word, he saunters over to the fallen tree, getting comfortable in the center of it with his elbows braced on his thighs. "For sure. I mean, you're… you." He waves a hand at me, and I know without a shadow of a doubt he was about to say something with the word princess in it. Yet he didn't. "I can't imagine what it's like having to hold everything so close to your chest." He shakes his head, his eyes drifting off as if he's truly contemplating it.

What the fuck is going on right now?

Before I can think better of it, I inch closer, dropping down on the log beside him as I stare off into the distance. His words fill the air around us a beat later.

"My father is on The Council. Trusting people is difficult for me. That's why I stick to the guys and don't really tolerate anyone else, because their intentions are always unclear." I try to imagine what that's like. If the kingdom didn't fall and everyone knew who I was, what would my friends be like? Would I have any? Or would it still be just Nora and me?

I huff at the thought. If it were up to my sister, she would force me to be so sociable my eyeballs would bleed. But deep down, I know in my core I would have the same regard for outsiders. The issue is that I've spent the past sixteen years being the outsider, happily enjoying my place, and now, everything is shifting.

It comes with being at the academy. I guess I knew that, but acknowledging the fact now that I'm at the center of it all feels different. I truly have lived a different life than what my birthright declared, and reclaiming it isn't going to be so easy when it changes every fiber of my being.

My mind races with thoughts and feelings, just as it did in the shower, but thankfully, there's no threat of tears springing to my eyes this time. Now, it's with the burning desire to get them off my chest. I can't talk to Nora about it, not when I'm trying to shield her from everything.

Maybe Flora?

"It's okay, Adrianna. I get it. I'm highly aware that I promised to fuck you and be gone, yet here I am, like a puppy desperate for more of your attention. I can't even begin to explain it myself." He wipes a hand down his face, but I'm left gaping at him.

"What did you call me?"

His eyebrows furrow. "Adrianna?"

"Why?"

He gulps nervously before sweeping his tongue over his bottom lip. "Because Raiden said you're of… because you are who you are, and you should be addressed as such."

I frown at him for a split second before I laugh, truly laugh. I cover my mouth to no avail as I try to calm myself down. I don't know what it is, but when I turn to look at him, seeing the uncertainty in his eyes, I manage to soften just a little.

"I'm sorry, I just… please just call me Addi because that's so unnecessary it makes me cringe."

"But—"

"Your dick was inside me before you knew anything, Brody, and you literally just said yourself about how people treat you differently because of your birthright. Are you going to do that to me?" It's my turn to offer a pointed look, and he shakes his head.

"No, that's what I'm trying to say?—"

"But your actions aren't quite meeting with your words."

Silence descends over us as guilt creeps over his features. He's right, it is strange. The guy sitting beside me isn't the same person who took me to the diner on Kenner land two weeks ago. Technically, if I wanted to point fingers, I could blame him, but that just feels like an excuse.

He doesn't deserve a single thing from me, yet I feel a desire to say something, anything, about last night.

Staring off into the distance, I run my hands over my thighs and sigh. "The worst part about last night is the fact that my history is creeping up to haunt me in the most public way possible, and I don't know how to feel about it."

He clears his throat beside me. "Your mom or your attacker?"

"Both," I admit with another heavy sigh.

She looked well, at least. Pulled along like a pet by that guy named Dalton, sure, but I'm certain she could have looked worse. I believe so, anyway. I haven't seen her for so long because she abandoned us—just like the stories said—so I can't be certain.

But did she abandon us? Knowing what I know now, could that be a lie too?

"Am I supposed to just go and save her now?" I blurt before I can think better of it, a new weight on my shoulders that I'm unsure I can shake off.

"Is that what you want to do?"

I turn, blinking at him as I feel the question deep in my bones. My adrenaline kicks in and uncertainty wars inside me as I let the situation consume me.

"I don't know. It's taken everything in me to put myself on the path I'm on now. I've spent forever hating her, and as much of a surprise as it may be, that doesn't change overnight." The truth rolls from my lips, not burning my tongue like I expect it to.

"Then do what's right for you," he replies with a shrug, like it's really that simple.

But what about my father… Nora? My chest tightens at the thought of her with regard to our mother.

"It's not just about me. It's about my father, my family, my people, the entire kingdom," I rattle off, avoiding Nora's name, but it's like he's drawn to the fact as his eyes settle on mine.

"What did Kenner do to your sister?"

"It doesn't matter," I grunt, sharper than necessary, as I shake my head.

"Is she okay?"

"She's better than the rest of us," I answer honestly.

"You're a royal. Princess Adrianna Reagan of the Floodborn Kingdom. You can do what you want. You can make him pay, you can save your mother, you can do as you see fit and no one is going to challenge that."

My chest clenches as the title falls from his lips, but the belief that he thinks I can just do whatever I please is almost laughable.

"I am, but Addi sounds just as good, too. My title doesn't make me who I am, and it's never going to simply get me what I want."

He offers me a half smile. "I can agree to that, but there's so much more to you than what meets the eye, Dagger."

I bite back the desire to grin at his nickname for me. I'm sitting here letting him worm his way under my skin again when I vowed to put distance between us.

My brain is a wreck, my mind isn't focusing like I want it to, and the desire to run and hide from it all is embarrassingly overwhelming when I pledged to myself that I would destroy anything in my way.

"What's going through your head?"

There he goes, trying to get deeper again.

I shake my head, not wanting to share anymore. "So much that I just want to pretend it doesn't exist right now," I admit instead.

"You can only pretend for so long."

I turn to look at him. He's right. Pretending only lasts so long and gets you so far, but I could combine the need to do so with the other desire that runs through my veins. It's probably a bad idea, but not one I can see biting me in the ass, so I go with it.

Sitting tall, I turn to face him properly. "I know, but given the chance, I would give everything I am just to forget for five minutes. You could help me with that."

He shakes his head, denying my offer, and despite the sucker punch to the gut, my head tells me it's the right thing.

"I won't fuck you as a distraction, Dagger."

Sighing, I stand. I need some kind of distraction, despite how weak it makes me feel. Then, I need to refocus. "Thanks for that chat, Brody. I'll see you around."

I make it two steps.

Two. Fucking. Steps.

"But I'll fuck you because it's what we both want, Dagger. You just have to say the word."