Chapter Eleven

Honey

"We're here." Zach's elbow rests against the window, and his hand plays with the tips of his brazen blond hair. I don't know how he styled it in a 1950s coif, but it suits him. He hasn't said a word since I picked him up from the bus stop, and I'm starting to feel guilty. "We don't have to stay too long. Just long enough so that people see us together."

"How many rooms does a place like this have?" Zach asks while staring at Eric's home. He drops his gaze down to his leather jacket and adjusts it so the white of his shirt peaks through.

I turn my attention to the large coastal mansion in front of us. Decked out with figurines haunting the lawn and cobwebs stretched across the porch, it's the perfect setting for a Halloween party and where Zach and I intend to make our official debut as a couple.

South Point students trickle out of the house, dressed as every character you can think of. Most of them are in drunken embraces, barely noticing their expansive surroundings.

"I've only been to Eric's a couple of times for some business dinners, but I think it's got nine bedrooms and probably like eleven bathrooms."

Grunting something inaudible, he shakes his head and sinks into the seat. I resist the urge to stop his bobbing knee and inwardly curse because it's obvious Zach is uncomfortable around all this wealth. I shouldn't have suggested this as our first outing.

"You'll stay by my side, right?" I ask, to make it clear that I need him as much as he needs me.

Finally, he turns, his emerald eyes twinkling. "Of course," he says, and that large confident smile I'm familiar with returns.

His gaze snaps to Eric's house, then to me before he sinks his teeth into his bottom lip. "Yeah, but before we go in there, I think we need to loosen up."

"Loosen up?" I lean over the console, waiting for him to explain.

"Yeah, after yesterday's more than stilted performance, I think we need to get comfortable with each other." His eyes flick down to my lips, his face giving nothing away. "We need to kiss."

Silence.

He licks his lips, then I realize he's being serious. Bursting out in laughter, I swing my head back against the headrest. "Right now?" He nods. "But we can kiss in there. We don't need to practice."

"Okay." Shrugging, he leans against the passenger door to get a better look at me. "But everyone in there"—he gestures with his brows toward Eric's front door—"thinks we've been dating for the better part of three weeks now, which is fine. But we've only kissed once in that time."

"Why does that matter?"

"Isn't it obvious? If we were actually dating, then we would have probably gone a lot further than kissing in the football tunnel by now."

Lolling my head to the side, my breath catches in my throat when I see Jamie walking into Eric's party, and my pulse pounds. McKenna is tucked under his shoulder, holding onto his shirt like the dutiful girlfriend she's become. Then he kisses her on the cheek with a satisfied, content smile which makes me feel sad and somewhat pathetic because here I am pretending to date a guy when Jamie's already moved on.

"If you want them to believe we're dating." Zach's face is beside mine now. He must have moved toward me to see what I was looking at. "Then we need to make sure you aren't repulsed by my touch."

His palms graze my thighs, his fingers dancing across my skin. I startle at the tingles driving up to my core, a feeling I'm not used to. "See," he says with a chuckle. "You can barely stomach me, and that doesn't exactly look good if we're trying to convince people we're screwing on my off days." He's so lighthearted with the words, but they stick in my head. That's not why I jumped, but I'm not about to admit that his touch felt good.

"It's not that I can't stomach you," I say, looking down at my lap. "It's that…" I pause, unsure how much I should tell him. He watches me expectantly. "It's that I've only been intimate with Jamie." The words feel like tar coming out of my mouth, but Zach doesn't falter. He remains expressionless, waiting for me to finish. "It feels a little weird when it's not his touch," I spit out, and turn away.

The silence is so loud I can't hear myself think. I shouldn't have said that. I shouldn't have said anything. I should have just gone with Zach's assumption and not embarrassed myself.

"I'm sorry that my lips feel weird." I can hear the amusement laced in his voice, and when I look over at him, he's grinning wildly. "But I'm sure once you kiss me some more, you'll start to feel differently about it."

He licks his lips, and my stomach flips, so I blow out a nervous breath. "I mean, you didn't seem to mind kissing me at the football game a couple weeks ago. What changed?"

I changed. I started to feel like this was a stupid idea and that I should give myself time to get over Jamie instead of fake dating you.

I keep the thoughts to myself because fake breaking up with Zach would be worse than going through with this. Besides, having twenty-five grand that my parents can't track could come in handy.

"It was different then." It's what I settle with.

"Why was it different? Maybe we can recreate it, and I can help make you more comfortable." Zach stares at me, and I know if I want this to work, I need to be honest, but it's getting increasingly difficult. How do I tell my fake boyfriend I still think about my cheating ex? Maybe it's only because the thought of Jamie is comfortable. I'm used to him, and even though he wasn't great, he was familiar. Zach is anything but that.

"I guess I was just overexcited. I had adrenaline pumping through my body then, and I'm just not feeling that right now."

Looking me up and down, he grins. "You know, I know some other ways to get your adrenaline pumping if that's what you need help with?"

He pops an unambiguous brow, making me laugh. "Zach, are you propositioning your fake girlfriend?"

He chuckles with me. "Hey, you're the one who said you needed to be overexcited to kiss me. I'm just the one offering solutions."

Glancing at the mansion, I see more students walk into the party. "How about we go in there and see how things go?"

"You mean like when I tried to hold your hand in the hallway the other day? You were so flustered you nearly jumped out of your skin." I sigh at the reminder. It isn't his fault I'm not used to PDA. "Wouldn't it be better to get the awkwardness out of the way here instead of in there?"

He has a point, but kissing him when no one is watching feels strange and a little foreign. Zach raises his hands. "Come on, just one kiss to loosen you up. I promise I'll keep my hands to myself."

I bite my bottom lip, look into his eyes, and smile. He's trying to help me relax, and maybe that's what I need… To go with the flow instead of being so stuck in my head all the time. Slumping, I unbuckle my seatbelt and turn to face him. "Fine, but if you get too handsy, we have to stop," I warn lightheartedly.

"Don't you worry, Meatball. My hands will be pinned to the pink leather of your seats."

Groaning, I roll my eyes and whack his chest gently. "Are you ever going to stop with the nicknames?"

"Not until I find one that sticks. So far, none of them suit you."

"What if I don't want a nickname?"

He doesn't answer, prompting me to raise a brow. "Sorry, Q-Tip. You're getting one." He offers a small smile and fingers a tendril of my hair, then brushes it behind my ear. To stop myself from flinching, I focus on his green eyes, straight nose, and bow lips. He is beautiful. His body leans in closer, and I keep myself in place, pushing any worries I have aside.

His lips are mere inches away before he grazes them against mine, capturing them in the softest kiss I've ever experienced. It feels almost like butterflies fluttering against my skin, and I sigh into the touch. He presses his lips a little harder, careful not to touch me anywhere else. I press back, letting him know I'm okay with this.

He takes advantage when my lips part for the slightest of seconds and skates his tongue across my bottom lip. His nose rubs against mine, and my brain goes so fuzzy I can't think straight.

The kiss is shorter than I expect and he's watching me when I open my eyes. Deep and mossy-green, his eyes draw me in, and are just as beautiful as the rest of him.

Our breaths mingle, the familiar minty scent from last time making my body tingle. Memories of our first kiss and how different I felt afterward cross my mind. I want that feeling again, and I don't want this kiss to end.

Tipping my chin, I bring my lips back to his, and there's no hesitation. He kisses me back. This time, though, it's firmer and more reminiscent of when he kissed me against the wall in the football tunnel.

With one hand resting on my thigh and the other clasping my back, Zach pulls me closer. My body tingles at his touch, and I lean in as much as the console between us allows because for the first time in a long time, I want more.

I open my mouth on a dare, inviting him in, and a small thrill teases at the back of my spine and heads straight to my burning belly when his tongue grazes mine. Zach's hand moves from my side, sliding to the back of my head, placing me exactly where he wants me.

His other hand tickles up my thigh, and those tingles ignite, giving me the same adrenaline kick as when he first kissed me.

I like this.

I want to keep going.

So, I pull at his jacket, smashing our lips together. His lips, his scent, and his taste devour me, and I've never wanted to get lost in something more. Fingers tease my upper thighs, moving inward, and my hips jut forward, chasing his touch.

Is this how it should feel when someone kisses you? Like you've lost your mind but you don't care?

If there was any hesitation left in me, it melts away when his fingers flex against my scalp, drawing me in. In that moment, I feel it. Zach's pain and frustration at the world. He kisses me more aggressively, and I happily take it because every ounce of his pain feels better than my own.

I feel it. I feel him, and it's the most connected I've felt with anyone.

Bang, bang, bang.

Zach jolts away from me, leaving me gasping. "Get a room," a muffled voice calls as they walk to Eric's house.

Breathless and a little hazy, I look over to Zach. His shirt is now ruffled, his hair no longer pristine, but most importantly, his face is smeared with my lipstick.

Was he as affected as I was by that kiss?

"Good technique," he mumbles, sounding more like his coach than a guy whose fingers were so close to my center I could almost feel it. Swallowing, I nod slowly and tuck my lip inside my mouth. His taste still lingers there, and embarrassment sinks in. He was going along with it, helping me loosen up. That meant nothing.

"Thanks," I reply, almost mechanically. "We should, uh, go inside." I grab the door handle, refusing to look at Zach because I'm beyond confused about what just happened. The feelings I had weren't supposed to be there. His door slams, and before I know it, he's by my side, offering his hand as I step out in my six-inch heels.

I gingerly accept, and when our palms connect, I feel it again. There's this electricity charging me from the inside. A small zing that makes me feel like I'm on top of the world, which is only solidified when Zach smiles at me.

Oh, God. What the hell am I doing? Am I starting to fall for my fake boyfriend? After only two kisses and no commitment. No wonder Jamie found it so easy to manipulate me.

"Honey?" Zach squeezes my hand, and I shake the thoughts out of my head.

I'm not falling for him. If anything, the feelings I have are similar to a rebound. He's the second guy I've kissed, so I'm bound to feel something.

"Mm-hm?"

"You ready to go in there and give them hell?" His fingers waffle with mine as he shuts the door with his hip. I give him a curt nod, still watching the ground and pretending it's because I can't balance in heels, which is the biggest lie in history. My mom taught me to walk in heels before I could say the word shoe, but it feels easier than looking into his eyes and seeing nothing but a small friendly smile. How tragic would that be when inside, my heart is bursting?

I can already hear the whispers from other students as we walk to the porch, and Zach pulls me in under his shoulder, holding me close to him.

Here goes nothing.

"It's not so bad, is it?" I whisper in Zach's ear. With his lips trained flat, he pulls me into his side, nearly knocking me against one of Eric's dining room chairs to sit me on his lap. After walking into silent glares, we found the quietest room to get some respite.

Once I'm seated on his lap, I wrap my arm around his neck and relax. Jamie and I were never much for PDA; I realize now that's probably because he was sleeping with half the school, but with Zach, it feels comfortable.

Nuzzling into my hair, Zach's breath tickles my neck, causing me to let out a breathless giggle. "Did I forget to tell you how hot you looked tonight?" His hand squeezes my bare thigh, tracing the edges of my tight black dress. It's a pathetic attempt to look like Rizzo from Grease to match his Kenickie outfit, but neither of us made much effort. Olivia told us we'd need to wear matching costumes for this stupid party, and I didn't want Zach to have to buy anything.

What I didn't consider was how good Zach would look in said white shirt. I'd only ever seen him in his blazer, but now, seeing him dressed down, I realize why all the girls in our school are interested in him.

Zach is stacked. The white shirt only emphasizes the bulges that his blazer usually hides.

"Thanks. You don't look too bad yourself." I smile, and as he adjusts his leather jacket, I get the tiniest peek underneath. Yep, his pecs are outlined perfectly in the shirt.

Football players walk past us, giving Zach nods of approval and fist bumps as they go. "Do you see that?" he says into my ear. "They're all jealous that I'm the one that brought you here."

"Yeah, because of that stupid bet."

"No. It's because you're the hottest girl in the school."

Slapping him lightly in the chest, I laugh but then pause because this whole thing feels weird.

"What's wrong?" Zach's eyes search mine.

I look up and swallow. "I don't know. This feels different than I thought it would."

"In what way?" I don't know how to answer, so he does it for me. "Do you mean the same way kissing me felt different from Jamie?" His fingers press my side as he gives me a small, reassuring smile. The words spike in my throat because, yeah, that kiss is part of the reason I'm feeling weird. Because even though the point was to prove to everyone that we're dating, all I want to do is go straight back into that car and kiss him some more.

"I guess so. I just thought that doing this would feel a lot more like revenge. It kind of feels like we're fooling around more than anything." It's the closest he'll get to me admitting that I've liked being touched by him.

Zach pulls me in a little closer and turns me to face him. "Well, hey, if you want to make fooling around part of the deal, I'm more than happy to negotiate," he says with the hint of a smile. It's contagious, and all that nervous energy I was feeling eases the longer he looks at me.

Before I can answer, the door bangs open with a loud thud and all I see is Jamie.

My heart turns to stone as he drags McKenna into the room, directing her to a quiet corner. I've never seen him smiling so broadly as when he pulls her into him and kisses her forehead.

"Boo?" Zach whispers into my ear, but I don't respond because the beating of my heart is too loud.

Jamie's hands are all over McKenna, stroking her in ways only I could imagine.

He's doing this on purpose. He doesn't need to be here. The house has fourteen rooms downstairs, so if he didn't want me to see him, I wouldn't. Hell, he could have taken her to one of the thousands of bedrooms in this place to save me from any more embarrassment. But he came in here.

He scouted me out.

He wanted me to see this because, apparently, a viral video wasn't enough. After our chat the other day, he wants to make sure I see it in person.

"Funny. I thought you hated my nicknames, Boo?" Zach singsongs, and his arm holds me tight, but that doesn't stop the huge weight in my stomach.

I can't keep my eyes off Jamie. The way his hands rub the small of McKenna's back, the way she shifts her hair to one side so he can kiss her softly on the neck. It's so tender it hurts.

Laughter echoes around the room, and without looking, I know it's me they're laughing at. They are watching my dreams die in front of me again, only this time, I don't have sunglasses to hide my watering eyes. Swallowing, I try to still my trembling lip as best as possible. Everyone's watching, waiting for my epic freakout so they can record it and make me the laughingstock of South Point Prep again.

Sweat drips down the back of my neck until my red scarf soaks it up. Unfortunately, there's nothing to cover my soured face.

Sitting a little straighter in Zach's arms, I try to hold my resolve. Then Jamie's head dips down and his eyes meet mine for the quickest of seconds. His lips lift into a smile as he stares at me while bringing his lips to hers.

I will not get upset. He's doing this to me on purpose. I don't want him. I just want him to stop treating me like a doll he can break over and over again for his own enjoyment.

"You've let me no choice, Boo." My mouth is slightly parted while I watch Jamie eat McKenna's face. It's not sexy or romantic this time. It's a claim and his way to prove I'll never get over him.

Suddenly, there's a soft, wet touch against my neck, and I close my eyes on a gasp. Zach grips me tighter while his lips work over my sensitive flesh. "I'm guessing you like that?" he asks with a chuckle, but I can't answer because there's a feeling I can't quite describe churning inside me.

He drags his lips up my neck until they reach my ear. "Remember what I said about relaxing? This is first-date stuff. I would have done much more to you if you were mine." I close my eyes, tilting my head to rest on his shoulder, and try to relax into his touch. His hands roam my sides, digging in at the skin under my bra before moving them back to my thighs and the hem of my dress.

Smiling at his teasing gestures, I thread my hand through his hair, directing him.

He nips at my neck, just under the scarf, no doubt leaving his mark there, but with each stinging sensation, I'm further from the hurt Jamie caused and closer to that feeling I had when it was just Zach and me in the car.

And I want more of that.

Zach groans against me after a nibble and tickles the area with his tongue. My mouth drops open as I let the sensation of him touching me take over. His fingers dance under the fabric of my skirt, and instead of pushing him away, I part my thighs.

My eyes open wide when I realize what's happening.

Surely not?

Another swipe of his tongue and a tickle of his fingers.

Tingles grow, and there's no denying it now. Those tingles are shooting straight to my center. I'm getting turned on by Zach's touch, and I wonder if he knows it, because his hands inch farther up.

"Mmm," I moan, pulling at his hair harder. Even though I haven't processed how I feel about him making me so horny, I don't want him to stop.

Just as my hips roll against his thigh, his hands move away, and I groan in frustration.

"You forget about him yet?" he asks, leaving the tiniest of kisses against my shoulder.

The throbbing between my thighs doesn't stop, but his words douse me like a bucket of freezing cold water. He's touching me like this because he wants me to forget, not because he's attracted to me.

"One last thing," Zach whispers before using his finger to guide my chin to look at him. I can't open my eyes because I'm too embarrassed with how hot he's made me.

His lips press against mine firmly, making it clear to anyone watching that I'm his and he's mine. His tongue slides across the seam of my lips, flicking at them. I inwardly curse because the first thing I wonder is how his tongue might feel across my hot center. My mind wanders to how he'd play with me and make me feel things I've only heard other girls talk about.

I open my mouth, letting him in, and his tongue enters and leaves in a motion that feels a lot like sex, only better. His hands are back to touching me, and the tension in my body is building. It doesn't matter that this room is full of people we go to school with or that Jamie is probably watching. All that matters is that there's this lust building in my body. I'm not sure where this is going, but damn, I want to see it through.

I claw at Zach, and my wet panties indicate how close I am to something I've only ever experienced on my own.

A few more touches, and I'll get there. I can feel it.

His tongue darts out, then he pulls away and wraps his arms around me, holding me to his side. "Thought that would help get your mind off things," he says, kissing the spot where he's no doubt left a hickey, and relaxes against the wall.

I'm glad he can be calm, but my body feels let down, the throbbing only mildly dulling with the lack of stimulation.

I was so close, but then he stopped.

When I look around the room, Jamie and McKenna are nowhere to be found, but prying eyes watch us and whisper. One thing is for sure: Zach's doing a damn good job making people believe I want him.

"Well, that went well," Zach says, smiling at me as we sit in my car.

"Yeah, not too bad," I reply, biting my lip. If you call nearly giving me an orgasm from just touching me with my clothes on going well, I'd have to agree.

"Not too bad? That's it?" Zach tilts his head, studying me.

Shit.

Does he know he nearly rocked my world?

"Did you see the guys' faces when we walked out? We killed it." Okay, at least it seems he's oblivious to what happened earlier. "I wish I could have taken a picture of Jamie's face when he saw me kissing your neck."

"I'm sure someone got it," I mutter, thankful he didn't mention the whole near orgasm thing but also feeling a tiny bit salty that he didn't even notice.

"Let's get that money, Teacup. Give Jamie the biggest FU of his life." There he goes again, touching my thigh and giving it a friendly little squeeze. Friendly being the operative word there. That's all it is. Friendly . He doesn't want to thrum his fingers against my center like I've imagined for the last hour. No. That's just my wishful thinking since I haven't had sex in a long time.

I don't look at him, too concerned he'll know what I'm thinking, so instead, I nod and turn the ignition. "Yeah. Can you put your address in the satnav? My mom will kill me if I'm not home by curfew."

He cracks his knuckles. "You just need to drop me off at the bus stop. I'll find my own way home," he retorts.

I wave him off. "Don't be ridiculous. I know that bus. My elocution teacher takes it to see me, and I know that after nine, it only comes once an hour." He whips his head up. "It's already midnight. I'm not going to let you wait an hour out here and not get home until God knows when."

He doesn't speak. "If you don't tell me, I'll just call Mike; I'm sure he has your address, and if he doesn't, I'm sure he can find it."

Zach grumbles, slipping into his seat. "It's about thirty minutes out of your way."

"So? I'd rather know my fake boyfriend got home than come to school on Monday and find out he had to sleep on the bus-stop bench. Come on, just do it, Zach." He's still indignant, and then it hits me. The question about the house size, the comments about my car. Is he embarrassed? "I won't tell anyone where you live if that's what you're worried about." I hesitate, not sure if it's my place to say anything, but I hate the idea of him being on his own.

"I'm not embarrassed about where I'm from," he says through gritted teeth, and I immediately feel like an ass because I don't want him to think that's something I care about. "I just like to keep my home life away from school."

"Don't worry. You are still keeping them separated. I'm just helping you get home. That's all." I play it off as nothing, but his resistance makes me curious. What's he hiding?

When I lock the car door, he realizes he's in a losing battle, then types in his address slowly. When I see the town, I'm not surprised. Northlake. That's where my elocution teacher lives too. It's nowhere near the South Point of town in terms of glitz and glamour, but I've always liked the area whenever I've visited. Something about the quaint cottage-style houses make me feel at home.

"Great. It says it will take me twenty minutes from here. That's nothing."

Our ride there is quiet, but I don't care. The less we talk, the less opportunity there is to discuss my near orgasm and what I will have to do about it when I get home.

"It's just here on the right." It's the only thing he says, and hearing his deep voice after all the silence soothes my stomach. The house he's pointing at is small. Well, small in that it's not one of the mansions I or any of the other students at South Point would live in, but it's not tiny, and something about it looks far homier than any of the giant soulless houses I know of.

There's a warm light glowing downstairs, and I immediately feel something. "Are they waiting up for you?" I ask.

He looks at me for the first time since we left that party and offers me a small smile. "They're probably just up. It's hard to sleep in our house sometimes."

"Why?"

He opens his mouth, ready to answer, but then stops himself before starting again. "My parents work several jobs, so you never know what shift they're on, which means there's always someone up in the house."

I nod, pretending to understand how tough it must be for someone who can hear their family members moving around. That's not exactly been an issue of mine since I was a toddler. Having your own wing in a house does have its benefits, but it also makes me feel lonelier than I'd ever like to admit.

Something in his house catches my eye. The curtain twitches, and a face appears in the window. It's a girl about our age. Even in this light, I can tell she's beautiful with her long dark hair and small features. "Who's that?" I ask, pointing at her. She hasn't noticed us sitting in the car since the streetlight we're sitting under has crashed out.

"My sister," he blurts out. I look over at him and can immediately tell he's shut down a little. There's something about her he wants to keep private, and I can understand that.

"She looks nice," I say.

"Thanks for tonight," he says. "I'll see you at school on Monday. We'll probably have to walk in together." I nod. "So, shall I meet you in the parking lot at eight?" I nod again, feeling oddly formal. "Great, I'll see you then." And like that, he's shut the door and has left me sitting there, watching him jog up to his house.

Turning the car back on, I drive away, trying not to think about Zach and how good his kisses felt tonight.

Yeah, that's a losing battle.