48. Ember

48

EMBER

I didn’t have to see him to know he was here. I sensed him, like I always do when he finds me. This time, when my eyes meet his, there is something deeper behind them. Like he’s drowning and he’s silently asking me to pull him up.

There was a shift after we returned from his parents’ house. He’s been a little more reserved, like he’s trying not to push anything too much. I think he’s being sensitive to the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on the last few weeks. My brothers did end up reaching out to me. Well, Benson and Cody did, claiming my mother and Robert are doing everything in their power to maintain their status.

According to Cody, Robert Riley will be running for governor, and my recent rebellion of leaving home and running off with a stranger from a drunken Vegas marriage was completely unacceptable for his image. His oldest son being gay is completely unacceptable, and he’s attempting to win over Cody and Benson to try to appear normal to the voters of Missouri.

They failed at that attempt, being that Cody and Benson told me last night they decided to list their homes for sale and move. Cody’s company is willing to transfer him to their Houston operation, and Benson works remotely, so he can work from anywhere.

I completely broke down and told them how much it hurt me. Neither one reached out those first few days after everything happened, and that left some underlying trauma. I felt so alone, and I never want to feel like the people I care most about can so easily disregard me.

Regardless, I know how challenging and persuasive my parents can be. So, I told them I would come visit when they got settled in Houston, and that would give us a reason to visit Hudson’s parents again.

Hudson overheard me say that last night while on FaceTime with them, and he craned his neck back in shock. I realized it probably wouldn’t be for a couple of months, which is after the baseball season is over, so I can understand his surprise. I quickly backtracked, trying to pull back my words, but I just ended up looking like a blubbering idiot.

I was also still reeling through the conversation with Kari from the night before. Kari is Derek Callahan’s wife, and Hudson’s closest teammate. She’s probably the closest friend I have here, which saddens me because Callahan is retiring this year and she won’t be part of the team anymore.

But neither will I.

The thought has been weighing on me, and I’ve found myself pushing away from, well, everyone. Including Hudson, and I feel like it’s better that way.

Especially after Kari told me that the owner and Coach Raymer are going to offer Hudson a contract. She said she didn’t know anything else, other than it was being negotiated and that Hudson was aware it was coming. He loves the team, loves Seattle, and it’s been such a pipe dream for something like this to happen. I’m shocked he didn’t share it with me the moment he heard.

It is something personal to him that doesn’t involve me after the season, but I guess I just saw myself as someone he could confide in.

Now that the club is open and I’ll have some time off, I’m going to start looking for a place and plan a move out date. I think it’s truly for the best, at this point, before things get messier than they already are. We’ve blurred so many lines it’s hard to see any of them now.

I uncomfortably shift my weight in my way too tall heels and excuse myself from the couple that came up to introduce themselves to me. They flew in from California for the opening, being avid in the lifestyle. They were excited to be here, at what they called the club’s maiden voyage.

Shaking their hands, “Thank you for coming. It was so great to meet you guys.” I step in the direction of the bar and glance back over in Hudson’s direction. Like a hawk, his eyes are still on me, watching my every move. I smother a smile and dip my head down with a shyness only he can pull out of me. How one man can make me retreat into myself in the most timid way, but bring out such a powerful woman in the bedroom, I’ll never know.

Goosebumps swarm over my skin as I continue my way across the room.

He looks fucking edible. All black everything, and even though he blends in with the dim room, you can’t miss his presence. It’s colossal and demanding, and I’m drawn to him in every way.

I stop at the bar, placing my empty champagne glass on the bar top, which is instantly replaced by a full one thanks to the amazing bar staff that we’ve hired for the club.

I take a sip, peering over in his direction again. Still he fucking stares, with a smirk only I know. This man.

I shake my head and smile behind the long flute of my champagne glass.

Oh, fuck it. This whole long distance teasing has gone on long enough. I find my inner tigress and turn in his direction, allowing the mask to give me assertive confidence.

I feel like I’m floating in his direction as I take him in from head to toe.

He has one hand on the stem of his glass and one hand in his pocket. Seductively taking a sip while staring at me through the mask that makes him look like a king.

“Ember!” My name floats through the air from behind me, ripping my gaze from his.

I turn to see Elena. Even with her mask, you can’t miss her luscious blonde hair and bright blue eyes, especially with her arms interlaced in the arms of two incredibly handsome men beside her.

“Hi!” I say with genuine happiness. She throws her arm out for a hug and I lean in for it. “You did this. You created this,” she whispers in my ear before she pulls back and looks at me, holding my hands in hers. “I hope you are proud of yourself, Ember. This is truly amazing.”

I can’t help but smile at her praise.

“It really is,” Jake replies. Leaning in, he kisses me on the cheek. Christian does the same on the other side, and I can’t say that it didn’t send some shockwaves everywhere. I wonder, for a brief moment, what it would be like to be shared between two men, but when I glance back at Hudson and see his Grim Reaper death stare, I quickly extinguish that thought. And what the hell am I thinking? I can hardly handle Hudson alone.

“Thank you.” I say sincerely. “Thank you for believing in me.”

“Easiest decision I’ve ever made,” Christian replies with a smile behind his mask that covers a majority of his face, but the kindness behind his eyes say more than enough.

“Do you remember Corbin?” He holds his hand out next to me. I turn enough to open a space for Corbin to step up next to me .

“Yes, good evening, Mr. Maren.” I smile, because you can’t not smile at Corbin Maren. He places his hand at the small of my back and grants me a kiss on each cheek.

“Ember, this is very impressive. I was congratulating Christian, but he confessed he had nothing to do with this and you were the mastermind here.” Corbin’s compliment has me blushing a deep shade of red, and I’m more than thankful for the mask that covers my cheeks.

“This was the perfect marriage of teamwork, sir.” I idle on the description of perfect marriage, and my eyes focus on Hudson, who stands in my periphery behind Corbin. I swallow thickly as he studies us. I continue, “Christian and Elena took a chance on this idea, and if it weren’t for Cruz, none of this would have happened.”

“I love your modesty. It’s a great leadership quality,” he compliments again, then turns to Christian. “Christian could learn a lot from you,” he quips.

“You’re fired,” Christian replies sternly, then chuckles, and that loosens the mood a bit.

Christian and Jake open up a bit and banter back and forth. Elena and Corbin chime in, sharing a few stories, and it’s a few minutes of easy going conversation.

“So, Ember,” Corbin takes advantage of a brief pause in our conversation, “I have a director position available in our Manhattan office, and although I had to do some major groveling, Christian gave me permission to extend an offer to you to come visit the teams and see if that is something you would be interested in.”

I lose my footing, even though I’m literally standing still, and my heel falls from underneath me. Corbin reaches out, catching my forearm and helps balance me.

God, how embarrassing.

“Oh, wow,” is all that I can come up with.

He glances over at Christian as I turn to Elena. Jake stares at her as she stares at me. They know my situation with Hudson, and I can tell it’s as awkward as it should be.

“Corbin informed us one of his directors is retiring, and when he brought up his interest in you, I wanted to pay you the same respect I would want from my boss.” Elena looks over at Christian. “I would always want to be given the opportunity to make the choice.” She smiles at me, knowing what all this means.

She continues, “For the record, we don’t want you to go, and I know you might not want to move. But I didn’t think it was fair to not afford you the option to make that decision for yourself.”

Jake shifts uncomfortably, clenching his jaw, as he looks in another direction, avoiding my gaze all together. He clearly doesn’t agree with Elena on this.

Corbin isn’t privy to my entire relationship dilemma, so I’m not sure what he’s thinking, but I know he is very interested in having me join his team.

“Have you been to New York?” Corbin asks.

“No. I’ve been wanting to plan a vacation there, and it’s been a bucket list dream to work in Manhattan one day,” I confess, which feeds Corbin’s sales pitch.

“Come visit for a week, get to know the teams, the area, and you’ll have a better feeling about everything after you spend some time in the city. If anything, you get the vacation you’ve wanted, and then you can make a truly authentic decision.” This is why Corbin runs the entire east coast. He can sell you on just about anything.

“You know, I can’t pass that opportunity up,” I reply to Corbin as he smiles at my resolve.

“I know it’s a big decision, but ultimately, I would like you to mock what you did here. Creating a club like this one, but in Manhattan—” I glance around, knowing how much energy and effort I put into this, and wonder first if I can do it again. Second, do I want to? This feels like my baby, and Seattle feels like… home. “That would be the first of many projects in your new role as Director.”

I glance between the four of them, their eyes studying me behind their masks, and it feels so surreal. There are multiple goals being checked off here, and I’ve only ever dreamed of coming together like the perfect storm, which is creating a tsunami of emotions.

I can’t pass up this chance. New York City. Director. The beginning of a life I can call my own. Not ruled by the desire to please anyone else, including the parents that never wanted me, that never even cared about me.

I touch my neck, the pulse point at the base of my throat that Hudson loves to kiss, knowing if I say yes to this, I have to give up something I’ve come to rely on. A small panic filters through me. Relying on that makes me more like my mother than I want to be.

I never want to be like her.

I steel my spine and lift my chin, showing the confidence I’ve gained. The confidence in this position and myself, that Elena has pulled from me in ways that only she could inspire. The confidence it takes to make hard choices and do hard things.

Finding my best conference room smile, “When would you like me there?”