15. Jensen

CHAPTER 15

JENSEN

W aking up with a girl in my arms has never felt this good.

Billie is still asleep when I wake up, so I close my eyes, holding her against me, listening to us both breathe. It feels like our hearts must be beating in perfect synchrony.

The days we’ve spent together have been great, but it’s been like they’ve been building to this the whole time. Well, maybe not this exactly, but something, anyway. To a lasting friendship, at least. Now, maybe, if I’m lucky, it might even be a romance.

My head spins at the idea. For a second, I let myself get lost in a fantasy, imagining a year or two from now, still waking up with Billie in my arms, bringing her back home and treating her to the life of a princess. Of course, she would soon learn that it’s not that glamorous at all, but I wouldn’t let her worry about a thing.

She would have anything she had ever dreamed of. I would give her the world if she asked.

As it is, we’ve got three days left before Billie’s permit runs out. The finish line is racing into view and no amount of pretending is stopping that.

“Jens?” mumbles Billie, shuffling in my arms as she wakes up.

“Good morning,” I say, kissing her face as best I can from the awkward vantage point I’ve got.

“It wasn’t a dream, then,” she whispers.

“No, it was better,” I whisper back.

She giggles, and the sound of it fills me with a lightness I haven’t felt in a long time. Would it even be possible to live on this island forever? I like the idea of that a lot. Me and Billie, here in blissful paradise, forever.

“How did this happen?” she says, her eyes heavy from not being fully awake yet.

“Well,” I say, pulling her closer to me again so I can nip at her throat, “when I have a beautiful woman in my bed, I usually want to give her a good time.”

With that, I let my hand roam down her body a little, feeling the soft curves of her waist, mapping them with my fingertips. This is something I want to remember.

She sighs into me, her hips bucking towards mine fractionally, and it takes all my strength not to roll us over and take her again, here and now. But I can be patient. I can take it slow.

I’m happy enough tasting the sleep on her skin as I kiss a trail down her neck. She smells divine, even after a night of sweat and sex. She smells real, like musk and wood and smoke. I want to breathe in every inch of her.

If she’d let me, I’d devour her.

I decide to push it a little further, letting my fingers make their way to her still-bare ass, barely concealing my smile at being able to touch her.

“God, Jens,” she moans. “If you keep doing that, I’m going to have no choice but to do very bad things to you.”

My grin widens, and I lean in to kiss her, savoring her warm, soft lips. “What sort of bad things?”

“Well,” she says, pushing herself up onto her elbow and smirking wickedly down at me, letting her fingernails scratch a light trail down my chest, lighting me up like she’s plugging me in. “Last night was good, but I’m sure you can do better than that. And,” she pauses, her hand tickling its way down my body towards my hardening length, “I’m sure I can think of a way to motivate you.”

“God, Billie,” I growl, my heart pounding in raw desire. I prop myself up and lean over her, pinning her down to the bed so I can tease her nipples with my teeth, in a promise to put my mouth exactly where she wants it. “I just want to eat you all day long.”

She moans in response, a sound that’s a perfect harmony to my ears. I shuffle down her body, rolling my tongue down her belly, hungry for the taste of her wetness.

“How did I get so lucky for you to want this?” she gasps as I settle between her legs.

“You’re lucky?” I say, leaning forward to nip at her thigh in that spot that I found last night that makes her shiver. “I think you’ll find I’m the lucky one.”

“Surely you could have any girl you wanted,” she says, that self-conscious doubt forming a blush on her face.

“True, I guess. A lot of people have tried. After all, everyone thinks they want royalty.”

“What?” Billie sits up slightly, her eyebrows lowering in confusion and recognition, and I realize the moment is completely shattered. “What do you mean, royalty ?”

“Not like, royalty… like, ooh, royalty ,” I say, panicking. “More like, um…” I trail off and grin weakly, flustered as I can’t think of a lie good enough to put her off the trail.

She sits up straight, pulling away from me and wrapping the covers around herself. “I mean, I assumed you were rich, but I didn’t realize you had royal blood. What are you — some kind of duke or something? A knight? Are they royal?”

I reach out and take her hand, probably for what’s going to be the last time, and close my eyes, steeling myself for the confession I have no choice but to make. She doesn’t deserve any more lies. “A prince,” I say softly.

Her mouth opens and closes again, like she’s trying to comprehend what I’m telling her. She takes a shaky breath. “A prince?”

All I can do is watch as she put the pieces together, and the moment when it clicks is sickening — a flash of sudden, horrid realization crosses her face, and then she gasps, snatching her hand away in shock. “Prince Jensen?”

I close my eyes and nod. I don’t know what else to do.

“As in, a thousand parties a year Prince Jensen? Slept with a million girls Prince Jensen? Doesn’t care about anything Prince Jensen? Sólveigr’s biggest celebrity export Prince Jensen?” She gets more and more agitated with each sentence, shaking her head like she can’t understand it.

I can only sit and watch as she thinks of every bad thing she’s ever heard about me. I reach out for her hands again, but she’s already flinging herself out of bed and dragging on a shirt, hiding that beautiful body from me. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!” she says, her voice loud. It’s not quite shouting — there isn’t enough anger for that.

It’s more a total horror.

“Why would you lie about this?”

“I didn’t lie… I just omitted some truth.”

“A lie of omission is still a lie!”

I can see tears forming at the corners of her eyes, and more than anything I want to go and hold her, to reassure her that all of that crap she’s read about me online is utter nonsense. Well, some of it’s true, but most of it is exaggerated to hell.

But she’s right. Anything I could say now would be a terrible defense.

“Billie,” I say pleadingly, not sure what else to do.

She holds up a hand and shakes her head, her golden hair falling over her shoulders. “Please, Jensen. Stop. I think you’ve done enough. Thank you for last night. But I need some space.”

With that she rushes out of the room, and I hear the door to the cabin slam behind her, leaving me all alone in the bed, surrounded by sheets that smell like her skin.

I guess the experiment of being normal is over.

It was fun while it lasted, but now I’ve been left with a gaping hole inside my chest. One that I know will never be filled.

And it’s all my fault.