Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

RAFAEL

The airplane taxis down the runway and I let out a relieved breath. I hate flying, but it's the quickest way I can get to Cuba. I'm glad we arrived, since Little Raf had a hard time during the flight. He was fussy and cried through most of it, rubbing and tugging at his ears. Now that we've landed, he's settled down, finally getting to sleep.

Omari looks a little frazzled, but he never lost his cool while Little Raf was fussy. I'm always in awe of him when he's with the baby. When Little Raf is feeling off and won't calm down, Omari stays composed and calm, never appearing frustrated or exhausted with taking care of him. He's fucking amazing.

I really wish I could get my shit together and tell him how I feel about him, but I can't get those three little words past my lips. No matter how much I feel like I show it, I see the hope diminish from his eyes every time he tells me and I don't respond in kind. It's not that I don't want to—the words get clogged in my throat and no matter how hard I try to push them out, they stay firm .

When the pilot opens the door for us, we step out into the hot, but breezy weather of Cuba.

Finn is waiting beside a nice black car, different from one of the classic cars he usually drives when I come visit. My brother-in-law and cousin own a garage that caters to keeping the classic American cars up and running with their original parts. Since Finn moved here, they've been able to get more of the older cars on the road and more Cubans happy they can drive their vintage rides around the island.

He pushes off the car and skips over to us, throwing his arms around my neck. I hug him back, smiling as I pat his back. "Buenos días, Finn."

Finn responds in kind, his Spanish sounding miles better than it did when he first moved here. "You must be Omari," Finn says, turning to my man. Finn holds his hand out. "It's nice to meet you." Omari shakes his hand with a small smile. "And this must be Baby Rafael." Finn holds his hands over his chest. "Oh my God, he looks just like you, Prez."

Omari laughs softly. "You call him Prez too?"

Finn blushes. "Well, yeah. That's how I met him. Did … did Prez tell you how we met?"

Omari looks at me, then shakes his head. "No, but I saw the news reports when everything went down."

Threading his arm in Omari's free one, Finn leads him and Little Raf to the car. "That wasn't the best time in my life, but it wasn't the worst. Rax kidnapped me, but I fell in love with him. On the first leg of his escape, he took me to Mellbind where I met Prez and the crew. I didn't know his name was Rafael for months." Omari chuckles as he glances over at me. I wink at him, making him grin and shake his head. Finn gestures towards the car. "I had to get a car seat for the baby. I don't know much about babies, but I hope this one is okay."

Omari nods. "It's perfect. Thank you."

Once all of our bags are arranged in the trunk and we settle inside, Finn slides in the front seat and points us in the direction of his and Rax's home. "Rax is with Diego," Finn says as he looks at me in the rearview mirror. "Something about getting stuff ready for you. He told me to let you know he'll be back right after we get there."

When Rax needed somewhere to disappear to after he escaped prison, I set him up here. Cuba doesn't have extradition to the US, as they have a very contentious relationship. Right around that time, my cousin Diego said he wanted to tap into the drug market in the states. Since Rax would need a way to make money, I made him my point man, someone else I trust on the island to look out for the coke that we transport back to the US.

As I stare out the window, a small smile blooms over my face as I take in my surroundings. The colonial style buildings, painted in bold colors, make me feel more at home than anything in Tennessee ever could. I miss it here, but I have too many bad memories to ever come back for good. I lost my family, my childhood, and almost lost my life on this island. I don't think I could come back long-term knowing those things happened.

We pull up to Finn and Rax's place and Omari gasps. "Your house is beautiful."

"It really is," Finn says, a smile in his voice. "I saw it and fell in love before I even knew I was coming."

Omari gets Little Raf out of his car seat and follows Finn into the house. They go into the kitchen so Omari can get a spoon to feed Little Raf. I settle on the couch and listen to Omari and Finn talking, a few snatches of laughter drifting from the kitchen.

When they don't return after a few minutes, I figure they're getting to know each other. I leave them to it. Omari doesn't need me hovering and I'm sure it's nice for him to talk to an adult that's not a member of the MC .

A few minutes late, Rax walks inside, looking as rugged as he always does, his long brown hair pulled into a ponytail and his beard and goatee longer. "Prez. Good to see you, brother."

I rise from the couch, walk over to him, and embrace him roughly. "Good to see you too, hermano." I hold him at arm's length. "You've been hitting the gym hard."

Rax was always in shape, but it seems to have gained a few pounds of muscle since I saw him last.

He ducks his head, nodding sadly. "Ever since Christian died, I've spent time in the gym. Too much going on up here." He taps the side of his head and I nod in agreement. "It drives Finn crazy, but it gives his mouth and ass a rest."

I bark a laugh. "Yeah, I'm sure he appreciates that. How are you holding up?"

"Better. I'm glad you're here. It's hard not being with everyone, but at least I have someone to talk to about him right now."

We have a seat on the couch and shoot the shit, talking about Christian and the other brothers in Devil's Mayhem. Finn and Omari drift back into the living room, Finn holding Little Raf with a happy, dopey look on his face.

Rax gives him one look and says, "Don't even think about it."

Finn laughs, sitting beside Rax and setting the baby on Rax's knee. "I'm not, I promise. No kids for me. But look at him, Rax. He's like a miniature Prez."

Rax cracks a smile and picks up Little Raf with one hand, holding the baby up in the air. Little Raf giggles high and sweet, reaching for Rax's hair. Rax nods. "He does look like you, Prez. He's a handsome little devil."

I smile, holding my hands out for my nephew. "Thank you. We're going to see my sister in a few. She wants to meet him. "

"Oh, Maria?" Finn asks and I nod. "Yeah, she and Luis were here a few weeks ago. That's how she found out about Elena. I'm sorry to hear about her passing, by the way."

"I appreciate that." I swallow past an unexpected lump in my throat to accept his condolences. "Can you give us a ride over?"

Finn nods, gives Rax a quick kiss, then grabs his keys. "Come on. I know the way."

As we take the familiar route to my sister's house, I brace myself to be around Maria. She's the best, no doubt about it, but like any big sister, she's very overbearing and overprotective. Especially after I was stabbed by our papa.

She didn't want me to move to the states with our abuelo, saying she would never see me again like Elena, but she was already struggling with her small children. There were too many mouths to feed for me to remain living with her. My grandfather was ecstatic that I wanted to live with him and sent for me as soon as I expressed interest. I had to promise to call Maria twice a week and write her letters before she would let me go.

When we pull up to the house, Finn turns to us and smiles. "If Maria doesn't give you a ride home, give me a call and I'll come pick you up."

We're not even out of the car fully when Maria throws open her front door and runs over to us. She hugs me hard, tears leaking down her face. "Oh, little brother. I'm so glad you're here," she says in rapid Spanish. "I missed you so much. You look good." She pulls back, then frowns. "Too skinny though. Come, let me feed you."

"Leave me alone, Maria," I respond with exasperation in Spanish. "I've already eaten. Damn, I'm a forty-one-year-old man. I can feed myself." I switch to English and say, "Omari has been feeding me. He's an excellent cook."

Maria wipes her eyes and looks at Omari when he steps up to me with Little Raf in his arms. My sister gasps, her hand covering her mouth. "Raffy, he looks just like you," Maria says in heavily accented English. "Then again, Elena looked like you too." She steps closer and holds her hands out, then lowers them and looks at Omari. "May I?"

He looks at me and at my nod, he smiles shakily at Maria. "Of course."

Maria's hands tremble as she takes Little Raf from Omari. Tears track her cheeks as she whispers to him in Spanish, pinching his cheeks gently. Little Raf grabs her hand, holding on tight as he smiles at her. "Oh, mini. Aren't you the cutest baby in the world?"

After she coos over the baby for a few minutes, soaking up his smiles and giggles, she looks up at Omari. "I'm sorry. I didn't get your name."

"Omari. I'm Omari. I'm Little Raf's nanny."

I wrap an arm around his waist and haul him closer to me. "He's my boyfriend, Maria."

She smiles. "Rafael. You've never bought anyone home before. And such a handsome man." She steps closer to us and drops her voice conspiratorially. "Blink twice if he twisted your arm to date him."

Omari laughs in a relieved burst. "No, he didn't. He's been sweet."

"Sweet?" she asks, rearing back dramatically. "Yeah, he definitely twisted your arm." She smiles and winks. "Come on in, you two. I have dinner on the stove."

"Does anything contain eggs?" Omari asks, trailing behind her. "Little Raf has an allergy."

She turns back to Omari with a smile. "I know. Rafael told me. I made sure nothing had eggs in the event you wanted to feed some to him."

Omari smiles gratefully. "Thank you."

We step inside and I breathe in the scent of ropa vieja, black beans, and yellow rice. My stomach grumbles as we walk further inside.

"Sit, sit," Maria says, walking around with Little Raf. "Luis is at the garage. Kids are at some kind of community event. They'll drop by later I think. Those hooligans don't like to cook their own food when they know they can just come to mine and I'll feed them. Spoiled rotten, I tell you." She says that with a smile. Even though my nieces and nephews are grown adults with their own lives, Maria still allows them to come over when they want for a hot meal. "Not sure if they'll come by before you have to go back to Rax and Finn's."

"All good," I say. "We'll hang for a few hours."

Maria hands the baby to me while she bustles about making our plates. She sets them out in front of us and we dig in. It's been a while since I've had her cooking. She's still the best cook in Cuba.

After we've filled our bellies and Little Raf has had his first taste of authentic Cuban food, we migrate to the living room. Maria holds Little Raf close, wrapping her arms around him while he dozes off.

She looks down at him and smiles, fresh tears brimming in her eyes as he pushes his lock of hair from his forehead. "I'm glad you brought him. I needed this. I've missed Elena so much." She chokes back a sob. I feel her pain, but my eyes remain dry. My heart aches, but I haven't cried in decades. I'm not sure why I can't bring myself to, even though I'm hurting. "But we have Rafelito." She grins. "I'm glad I got to meet the piece of her she left behind." Maria looks down at him once more. "It's uncanny how he even has her hair." I smile because I think the same thing often.

"He's a great kid," Omari says, grinning at a sleeping Little Raf. "Barely cries, sleeps through the night, laughs and smiles all the time. He's amazing. "

"I can tell," Maria says, patting his back. "So, how did you two meet?"

Omari giggles. "I really am his nanny. He was mean to me for a few weeks, then I wore him down." He winks at me and I return a deadpan expression.

I speak up. "He didn't wear me down. It was the other way around. He hated me because he thought I was going to beat him up." He snorts and I grab his hand, kissing the back.

Maria doesn't know how to take what I just said, so she just shakes her head and says, "I'm glad you're happy, I guess. I thought you'd end up old and alone."

I roll my eyes, but grin over at her. "Yeah, whatever."

"Do you think she was happy?" Maria asks softly. "She had to be, right? Since she had a husband and Little Raf. Elena was happy?"

Another lump forms in my throat, though my eyes still remain dry. "I think so. When I think about Elena, I think about her living the life she always wanted to live. The life she deserved after what happened to us." Omari slides closer to me, wrapping an arm around my waist. He delicately traces the scar on my side and I shudder, remembering he said I'm not a failure when I tried to protect Mama.

"Me too, hermanito. Me too." She swipes the tears from her face. "So, how is your motorcycle club? You still being an ornery ass to them?"

"Everything is good. I'm not ornery, I'm their president. I can't be soft on them when I need them to do what needs to be done." I don't go into detail, but Maria's husband works with me and she knows what he's involved in. But I want to respect her house and not talk about the ins and outs of our business.

We hang around for a few more hours, talking to Maria and telling her all about Tennessee. She wants to visit, so I told her I'll pay for her a passport so she can come hang out with us for a few days.

After crying some more and giving us long hugs, we take our leave, having called Finn to pick us up.

We go straight to bed when we get back to Rax and Finn's, stuffed full of good food and tired from talking well into the night.

The next morning, Rax and I visited the warehouse where they stash the drugs. We walk from table to table, checking that everything is wrapped and packaged properly.

"Looks good," I mutter to Rax, who is following close behind me.

"Diego and I figured it's better to pack ‘em up like this, so they're easier to hide on transport. Who's coming down next month for pick up?"

"Brian, Jace, and the prospect."

Rax chuckles. "You got a new prospect? He cool?" Rax killed one of the last prospects and Finn the other. Fucking murder couple.

I shrug. "He is so far. Jace put him forward. He's dependable. Omari's friend was in trouble and he wasted no time getting him out of there when I called. I think he might stick around for good."

Rax stops beside me, zipping up the bag I just looked through. "Speakin' of stickin' around, Omari seems like a nice guy. Gentle, like my Finn, and a spine just like him. You did good, Prez."

I smirk at him. "What? Not gonna give me shit for dating a guy?"

"Did you give me shit?"

My smirk turns into a full smile. "No, I didn't. I keep … I keep wondering if he'll wise up and see that I'm no good for him. He's soft, he's gentle. He's not like us. He's innocent."

"Remember what you said to me in your office when I said I wasn't good enough for Finn?" I nod, but don't speak. "You're good enough for Omari. He's with you because he thinks you're good enough for him. Don't think for him, let him make the decision for himself, yeah?"

"Sí. You're right. I can't lose him, Rax. He's my everything. He and Little Raf, they're everything. I don't want him to wise up and leave me."

Rax throws an arm around my shoulders. "From the way that man looks at you, ain't no way he's goin' anywhere. Besides, Finn was innocent too. You see where he ended up."

I glance over at him with a grin. "Yeah, I see. I told you that boy liked being sullied."

Rax barks a laugh. "True indeed."

We finish checking the supply and I talk to Diego for a little bit, then we head back to Rax's house so we can go out for a while.

Me, Omari, Little Raf, Rax, and Finn head to the beach a few blocks away, allowing Little Raf to play in the sand and he and Omari build sand castles. Well, Omari builds. Little Raf tries to put sand in his mouth and mostly succeeds.

Omari was uneasy about coming with his shirt off. I told him if it makes him feel comfortable, he can wear a shirt and not get in the water. Anything to make him feel at ease. He chose to wear a shirt, which does nothing to hide my desire for him. He sees me looking and ducks his head, cheeks pink as he uses the bucket to make more towers for his sand castle.

After an hour or so, Omari takes Little Raf to the water's edge, putting his tiny feet in the waves. Little Raf doesn't like the cold of the water, whimpering when it touches his feet. "Okay," Omari says, pulling him away and drying them off quickly. "No more cold water for you."

I chuckle, and Little Raf looks at me like he's not impressed. For a nine-month-old, he sure is expressive .

Finn and Rax sit under an umbrella and we join them, rubbing sunscreen on us and the baby. Omari's phone beeps a text tone and I raise an eyebrow. He sighs, pulling the phone from the baby's diaper bag. I notice his hands trembling when he checks the message.

"What is it?" I ask in a voice harder than I mean for it to be.

Omari jumps, holding the phone to his chest. Not like he's trying to hide the messages from me, like he's trying to stop his racing heart. "I … I don't know. Someone … someone … I've been getting these messages from an unknown number."

I hold my hand out, beckoning for him to give me his phone. Sighing, Omari slaps it in my palm.

"You got trouble, Omari?" Rax asks, leaning forward in his beach chair.

He shakes his head. "I don't think so. I have a feeling I know who it is and he's all talk." He swallows hard, holding Little Raf close. "Well, not all talk. But he knows I'm with Devil's Mayhem. He won't do anything."

Fucking Brock.

I check out the texts and my blood fucking boils.

Unknown: I'm going to end you when I find you. You took what's mine.

Unknown: You can't hide forever.

Unknown: You better hope I don't catch you on the streets.

There are many more like it, some messages repeating .

Narrowing my eyes, I ask Omari, "How long has this been going on?"

Omari sighs. "A few days. I didn't tell you because I didn't want to worry you before the trip. But I promise I was going to. I just … I wanted you to see your sister and I know if you knew, you would have stayed to find him." He looks at me with pleading eyes.

He knows me well because I would have. I sent my enforcer and VP after this piece of shit and he didn't get the message. I would have wanted to deliver this message myself. And it would have ended with Brock in a fucking body bag.

I hold out my arms and Omari moves over to me, nestling against me. "It's okay, precioso. You just have to tell me when shit like this happens. I have to protect you, yeah?"

"I'm sorry, Raf. I will if it ever happens again. But if it's Brock, he doesn't know where we live. And he knows I'm with you. Even he's not that stupid."

Kissing the top of his head, I find Shane's number in his phone and hit send. "I'll make sure of it." When Shane answers, I ask to speak to Zeke, who's thankfully with him. When my enforcer gets on the phone, I tell him, "Find that bitch Brock again. He's sending threatening messages to Omari. I'll be back in three days. If you find him, hold him for me, yeah?"

I can hear the sinister smile in Zeke's voice. "You got it, Prez."

After I hang up, I give the phone back to Omari. "It'll be taken care of, baby."

Finn chuckles. "You bikers are so cruel and efficient."

Rax grins at him. "What's wrong with that?"