Chapter 6

Ellax

I took the strange expression to mean acquiescence. "You."

"Okay, first question…" She smiled a tiny smile. "What's your name?" Before I could answer she added, "Oh yeah, drink." And tipped her glass back for a healthy swallow of lyven.

"My name is Ellax Pendorgrin, son of Ellax Pendorgrin before me, and his father before him."

She blinked a few times. "So, what, you're pretty high up in the Asterion nobility or something?'

"I am descended from a long lineage of Elders," I said proudly.

She seemed less impressed than she ought to have been. "Hmmm. Interesting. Okay, your turn."

I could have made my first question sexual, but decided to wait until she—and I—had both imbibed more lyven.

"What is your name?" I asked her in return, tipping my own goblet back. "Lorelai," she said. She glanced down at her glass, rubbing the stem between her fingers. "Lorelai Bristol. I went back to my maiden name after my divorce. I didn't want anything from Charlie, except our sons."

"Maiden name?"

She peered up at me from beneath her lashes. "Is this a question in the game or just a question? Either way, if I answer I think you should have to take a drink."

She was teasing me. I shrugged and took a drink. I knew my limits with lyven. I did not fear to pass those limits, either.

"Fine," she chuckled, "a maiden name is a saying on Earth. It refers to the last name a woman has before she gets married. In other words, ostensibly while she was a maiden."

Ah yes. I was aware of that custom. I'd simply not heard the term before.

"My turn," the human female, Lorelai, now said.

"No, it is mine," I protested.

"Uh uh. You skipped my turn when you asked about maiden names. Remember?"

I chose not to reprimand her for arguing with me, although it was very strange to have any form of argument from a human female, especially.

"Very well," I said. "Question—and don't forget your drink."

She shrugged one shoulder, took a drink, then asked, "Do you have any kids? You mentioned one living son, right?"

"By kids you mean…offspring?"

"That's what I mean."

"I have one. His name is Caide," I answered. "He has chosen a life on Earth rather than Asterion."

"Really." Her eyebrows rose. "That's unusual. Especially with you being an Elder and all. Don't you Asterions retain that rank by genealogy? Don't you need an heir?"

I found myself glowering at the wall in order to avoid glowering at her. The question stung.

"I am through with this game," I said, tossing back the remainder of my drink and setting the glass firmly on the bar.

She was silent for a long moment, then said very quietly, "Wow."

I heard movements as she, too took a swallow and then set her cup down.

"I guess we've both been screwed by those nearest and dearest to us, huh? You with your son, me with my ex-husband? Sometimes life really sucks."

Without giving me space to answer, she sauntered over to my bed where she plopped down. Yawning, she kicked off her shoes.

"I don't know about you, but all of this booze is making me tired."

To my utter astonishment, she lay back against the pillows, an arm over her face to shield her eyes from the light. "Will you wake me up in a few minutes? I'll go back to my ship, and we'll pretend this conversation never happened."

The audacity! No female I had ever bedded, besides my wife, had ever made free to simply lie down in my bed and go to sleep. Even Druea had preferred to slumber in her own bed once the coupling was past.

For some strange reason, my mind flitted to my son, Caide. To him and his human wife. I knew the layout of the apartment where he dwelled, there on Earth. I knew there was only one bedroom. Either he would share a room with his wife, or one of them would sleep in the living room. There would be no separate bedchambers, as my former wife and I had maintained.

Strange, I mused, studying the human female on my bed. I could not imagine surrendering my life as an Elder for her. Nor for anyone else. I had not surrendered anything for Druea. Not even my fidelity. Now she was gone, my son by her was gone, and my other son hated me.

These are indeed grim thoughts, I told myself.

Grim, yes, and detestable. I was not one to wallow in self-pity. I was one to lose myself in pleasure instead.

However, when I considered the pleasures awaiting me outside the walls of this ship?

They rang hollow. I would not lose myself in them tonight. I had hoped to find temporary solace with this human female. Instead, she had drunk herself into sleep and I had nothing to distract my foul thoughts or humor.

The Doreethan still waited outside. I could go to her chamber. If she had one. Likely, she shared a bunk room with other servers. Never mind that. We could find an empty area.

Even as I toyed with the notion, a soft snore distracted me. I glanced back over at my human guest. She was asleep. Fully, deeply, completely. And snoring. I observed the situation with slight disgust.

A female? Snoring in my bed?

However, the longer I observed her, the more humorous the situation became.

Perhaps it is time to give up pleasure for rest, I decided, bemused.

Or, as the human saying went, If you can't beat ‘em—join ‘em.

I was not much on human sayings. In this instance, though, it made sense.

Of a sudden, I realized I was weary. Weary of it all. Weary of the desperate need for entertainment to shield the hollowness inside. Weary of the burden of having to produce an heir on short notice, when I'd thought my duty of producing an heir had been accomplished many years ago. Weary of—

Well, simply weary.

Perhaps it was the lyven, but I was tired as I had not permitted myself to be tired in a very long time.

Divesting myself of my outer garments, I walked around the foot of my bed and to the opposite side. I glanced at the human female once more before sitting down on the edge of the mattress. It was a small bed, meant for one. If I were to lie down beside her, I would inevitably be touching her.

You were very much planning on touching her , my mind goaded dryly. Yet now you hesitate?

Touching her yes. Bedding her. But sleeping next to her?

It seemed so personal. How many females of various races had I bedded throughout the years?

My face screwed up in thought as I considered. Finally, I shook my head, admitting I would never be able to recall. How many had I slept next to?

"None."

I said the word out loud.

"I suppose there is a first time for everything," I muttered. Choosing to give up my contemplations, I lay down, drawing the sheets and blanket up over my chest. I turned onto my side, facing Lorelai, the human female. My chest brushed against her arm. She did not react. Except to breathe out another heavy breath. Mumbling a word in her sleep, she rolled away from me, onto her side.

A strange desire to be close to her, to be close to another sentient being, overwhelmed me. I wanted to snuggle up against her, press myself into her warmth, allow myself to wrap my body around hers. The yearning was not even fueled by lust, which was even stranger. Typically, I did not have desires such as this.

What under the stars was wrong with me?

My son Caide's attachment to his human wife, his willingness to surrender everything for her, had filled me with doubts and questions I knew not how to reckon with. They were toying with my mind. Maddening. Frustrating. Making me wish I knew how that felt—to love a female that deeply. To love anyone that deeply.

No. I would not learn that tonight, nor would I learn it with this female. Instead, I willed myself to roll away from her, scooting myself to the edge of the mattress, as far from my bedmate as possible. Mere inches separated us, yet we did not touch. The weariness, and the lyven, took hold. Dismissing all of my problems, I slept.