Chapter Seventeen

Jack

I wanted to be with them, searching the perimeter and making sure that everyone was safe. I understood the 5,012 reasons why I had to stay here. The number one reason being Bryant. But still, it made me uneasy knowing they were out there, looking to see if we were safe while we stayed back.

Hammer and Pop-Tart could handle anything that came their way—it was just a feeling of helplessness. Like I needed to do more. I wasn't gifted in computers, either, which seemed to be the bulk of the tasks here.

My beast was pacing, wanting…no needing to be doing something productive. The kids were all so sweet, grateful for the tiniest things we did for them. They didn't deserve the life they'd been dealt. And Ryan. Dear sweet Ryan, he'd been forced to grow up so young. Not once did he give the smallest hint that he saw the cubs as a burden. He was so strong and giving.

King was on the computer doing some searches and watching different cameras on our security footage, making sure he hadn't missed anything. Aziz was assisting him. And I was there, just taking up space, not wanting Bryant to feel the stress of all this. I told the guys I'd be right back and walked to the main meeting area where Nora was doing puzzles and coloring with a group of kids. I never wanted him out of sight. But I could watch him from where I was, and he could play with his friends and not sense the dread I was feeling. This was better for him.

"I thought maybe Bryant might want to color." I led him over to table where some kids were crafting.

"Paint, Papa?" He did love to paint, which always required a bath and some stain guard on his clothing.

"Crayons today," Nora had my back. "And I've got the big fat ones you like." They were pretty cool, shaped like triangles, and he did well holding them. He was one of the youngest ones there, and, he was probably too young to be participating, but I needed to be with the guys in case anything came up.

I knew all too well what it was like to be Ryan, to know that maybe my being there was causing others harm, putting them in danger. When they came to save me, I hadn't considered that my mere presence might be a danger for them. The only thing on my mind was keeping Bryant safe. But as I was sitting there postpartum, I realized that I had put a huge target on their backs by going with them. It took me a long time to forgive myself. I didn't want that for Ryan.

Ryan was in the kitchen, getting coffee for everyone, something he offered to do. Normally, I'd just give him space, working under the assumption that either he really wanted coffee, or he wanted the time away. But I felt a pull to talk to him, just for a little bit. If I sensed any hesitation on his part to chat, then I'd make an excuse for being in the kitchen and leave. Easy as that.

"Hey, thought you might need some help."

He chuckled, "Or you thought I needed checking up on, maybe?"

"I've been in your shoes."

That gave him pause.

"I've been the one rescued, the one who had to protect a child. Did they tell you how I came to be with this group of awesome shifters?"

He shook his head.

"Once upon a time, I was being held captive as a breeder."

He gasped.

"It's okay, honestly. Now I probably wouldn't change anything because I have Bryant and he is my world, but yeah, it was awful." I refused to ever let what happened control my future. "But the day that we were rescued, I was in labor. I gave birth to Bryant in a van on my way out of hell. I don't know, I guess I'm telling you this so you know that someone here understands what it's like to get away and be responsible for another person or, in your case, people. If you want to talk about anything, ever, I'm there for you. If you'd rather talk to an alpha, Pop-Tart is the one everyone goes to. He's pretty awesome."

"He is and thanks." He grabbed the back of his neck. "I might take you up on that."

I really hoped he would. He was far too young to have this much on his shoulders.

"Let's see if they found anything out." He handed me one of the trays he was working on, one filled with snacks and the other with coffee.

We walked back in.

"They're on their way back," King said, barely looking up from his screen. "They're running pretty fast."

"That doesn't sound good."

"Yeah, no, it doesn't."

When they came back in, they let us know the perimeter had been breached. Someone had been on our land, someone clever enough to hide their scent and not get caught on any cameras. There was no way to brush this aside as a shifter who accidentally wandered onto our territory. This was not only deliberate, it was well planned.

"Fuck." How I wanted it to be a coincidence and the message a wrong number.

Clearly, it wasn't.

If they wanted these kids, they were going to have to come through me. And then my head did what it always did. It complicated things and had me ready to run to the bathroom as it replayed my earlier conversation with Ryan. What if… What if this isn't about them?

What if it's me? What if I brought this mess here? If I were the one to take away our safety. If Ryan had heard of this place, who's to say the men who stole me hadn't also? Sure, a lot of them were dead. But a lot isn't all, and it only takes one.