Chapter 12

Caleb

As streaks of orange, pink, and red marbled the evening sky, creating a beautiful ending to a beautiful day, Caleb wondered why Mia hadn't called him in for dinner. He had been so busy with the farm, shoveling stalls and trying his best to get caught up, that he had lost track of time. But the sky never let him forget. Even if he lost track of time, God always told him when it was quitting time.

Exhausted, he summoned his strength and split some wood for the night and made a mental note to split enough for the week the next day. With winters in Wyoming, you couldn't let the wood box grow empty. If you did, you could freeze to death in a short period of time.

After he gathered the wood, he carried it into the house, wondering why it was dark. He looked around, and then saw Mia asleep in the rocking chair with his two children. Still holding the wood, he watched them sleep as something stirred inside of him. Being careful not to wake them, he quietly put the wood in the wood box, put some wood on the fire, and then went into the bedroom to wash up.

When he was finished, he slid into a clean white shirt and jeans, but didn't put his boots back on, feeling more comfortable with his feet bare.

Refreshed, he lit candles throughout the house, in the living room, kitchen, and two long tapered candles in long stemmed candle holders sitting on the kitchen table. Then, he walked into the kitchen to see what he could make for dinner, knowing that Mia had fallen asleep. But he was pleasantly surprised when he found the fried chicken sitting on the counter under the dishtowel, and mashed potatoes were on the stove, kept warm by the fire of the pilot light, along with fresh bread. Caleb went down into the root cellar for a jar of canned tomatoes, and made some stewed tomatoes, with bits of Mia's fresh bread stirred in. Then, he set the table with four place settings. Last, he put bath water on to boil.

Careful not to wake Mia, he took Shane and Hailey from her one at a time.

"Pa?" Shane asked when he woke.

"Shh…." Caleb led him and Hailey into the kitchen. "Let's not wake Mia. She had a busy day."

Shane nodded, smiling as he sat down at the kitchen table, along with his sister. Caleb fed them dinner, and then sat and enjoyed watching his children.

"Aren't you going to eat, Pa?" Shane asked as he took a bite of his chicken thigh. "Umm! This is really good."

Caleb chuckled. "It looks good, but no. I'm going to eat with Mia."

Shane nodded as he continued eating. Caleb tore Hailey's chicken into small bites for her when he saw that she was having a difficult time, but she ate her mashed potatoes by herself without issue.

When the water was heated, he poured it in to the tub in his room, repeating the process until there was enough water for the children. After they finished eating, he bathed them one at a time and dressed them for bed. They said their prayers, and he put them in bed and told them a bedtime story. Then, he kissed them both goodnight and pulled the door almost closed, leaving it cracked open.

When Caleb walked into the living room, he took Mia in, noticing the delicate curve of her neck as it fell to her shoulders, her feminine hands, and her beautiful face. Something stirred inside him, but he quickly pushed the thought aside. Never had he ever thought he would be afraid to touch his wife. Then, guilt reared its ugly head again.

Watching her sleep, Caleb didn't have the heart to wake her just yet, and he didn't want to eat without her, so he sat in the rocking chair across from Mia. He couldn't help but think of how caring and accepting she was of his children.

Mia really was beautiful. Her blonde hair turned golden in the candlelight, and the way her jaw curved to her slender neck was lovely. Her body was perfect with curves in all the right places.

"Mia," he whispered, hating himself for waking her. He waited for a minute, but she continued snoring lightly. "Mia, wake up. It's time for dinner."

Caleb reached out and gently touched her cheek with the back of his hand. "Mia…."

She didn't stir, and it was getting a bit chilly, so he put some wood on the fire. Warmth immediately filled the room.

Caleb walked back over to Mia and decided to try one more time. "Mia, time for dinner."

She stirred and opened her eyes.

"Wake up, sleepyhead," he teased, kneeling at her feet as he looked up at her.

Mia gazed at him and smiled, and then jumped with a start. "Oh my goodness! Where are the children?"

Caleb chuckled. "Don't worry. They've been fed, bathed, and put to bed."

"Oh," she said, looking around. "How long have I been out? The last thing I remember was rocking the children—"

"Are you hungry?" he asked, rising to his feet and extending his hand. "The fried chicken looks great."

She looked at him, confused. "You didn't eat yet?"

He shook his head as a smile lit his lips. "I was waiting for you." When she hesitated, he added, "I heated everything up, but it's going to get cold."

She took his hand and let him guide her to the table, the glow from the beige tapered candles bathing her in a golden hue.

Mia's eyes opened in surprise. "Everything looks great." She slid the cloth napkin across her lap. "I'm so sorry—"

"Shh…." Caleb gently pressed his finger to her lips. "It's okay. You've been working really hard… too hard," he said, taking her hand. "Mia, I can't tell you how much I appreciate it."

She nodded, forcing a smile. "I see."

Caleb wondered what he said that had changed her mood. He reached for her hand, claiming her attention. "No wonder you fell asleep."

She smiled and looked down at his hand in hers.

Caleb pulled away, and then slid the napkin across his lap. "So, shall we?"

Mia chuckled, and his heart soared at the sound, much to his surprise.

He said a blessing over the meal, and then added, "Let's eat."

She smiled as she spooned some mashed potatoes onto her plate along with a chicken breast, and he did the same.

Then, he sliced the bread. "Where did you ever learn how to make bread like this? It looks delicious."

Blush colored her cheeks. "I used to help my mother make homemade bread when I was younger."

Caleb nodded, noticing that she didn't say "before she died". He pushed the thought aside, wanting to keep the mood light as he took a bite of his chicken leg. "This is delicious. Mia, you really outdid yourself."

She smiled as she buttered a slice of bread. "Actually, Mrs. Jenkins showed me how."

His eyes opened wide. "You mean to tell me that this was the first time you've ever made fried chicken?"

She nodded, obviously pleased with his reaction. "In fact, I've learned a lot… since I came here."

"Really?" He took a bite of the creamy mashed potatoes. "You lived alone, so you obviously took care of a house before."

She nodded as she took a bite of her bread. "I knew how to take care of and run a house, but I've never been around children. I was an only child."

Caleb nodded. "Well, you're great with mine."

She nodded as her smile faded. "Actually, I hope you don't mind, but I feel as if they're mine, too. They're wonderful children. You have a lot to be proud of."

Caleb smiled appreciatively. "Well, Jessica had a lot to do with that…." His voice trailed off.

Mia reached over and touched his hand, forcing him to look in to her eyes. "You know, you can talk to me about her. You were married for a long time, and she left an impact on your life. I can't expect for you to eliminate her from your life entirely." She held his hand, and he didn't pull away. "And I wouldn't want you to."

His heart stirred, touched by her words. "Mia, you really are quite special." What woman would talk to him about his late wife… as a friend? He pulled his hand away. "I appreciate that, but not tonight."

Mia nodded, turning her attention back to her food.

"So, what did you do for the holidays?" he asked, not sure why.

She shrugged. "This year, I spent it alone. I worked on Christmas Eve, and then I was off on Christmas morning."

He nodded as he took another bite of his chicken leg, and a moan involuntarily escaped his lips.

Mia let out a deep breath as she leaned back in her chair. "Caleb, may I ask you a question?"

His eyebrows pulled together in concern. "Yes, you can ask me anything." He reached over and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

She bit her lower lip and released it. "Caleb, does it bother you that I was a dancehall girl?"

He smiled, shaking his head. "No, not at all. When they see what a good dancer you are, I'll be the envy of all the men here in town."

Mia pulled back her hand and lowered her eyes.

"Hey…." Caleb reached over and placed a finger gingerly under her chin, forcing her to look into his eyes. "I was only joking. I'm sorry. I never meant to offend you."

She nodded.

"Mia," he said as he held her hand. "You don't have to explain anything to me. In fact, I admire you for doing what you had to do in order to survive."

"Well, I just wanted you to know that I only danced with men. Nothing more."

He nodded, understanding. "What you did before we met is of no consequence. I understand that you had a life before we met."

Mia gave him a small smile and started eating again.

Caleb's eyebrows pulled together in concern. "Mia, have you ever been married before?"

She shook her head. "No."

"Why not?" he asked, unable to believe his ears. "I mean, you're smart, funny, intelligent, beautiful…."

She shrugged, a delicate blush coloring her cheeks. "I guess I never met anyone who filled my heart."

Caleb nodded, giving her a small smile. Then, he started eating again, lost in thought. Mia wasn't the type of woman who would just marry someone out of convenience, and it wasn't fair for him to expect her to. "Mia, I hope that you'll be patient with me."

Mia smiled. "Falling in love has to be natural. Not forced." She reached over and gave his hand a gentle squeeze. "I'm not expecting you to love me, Caleb. Not now. But maybe in the future, we can have something special." She let out a deep breath. "Caleb, I'll never be Jessica, but you can love people in different ways. Maybe someday, we'll come to love each other for who we are, and not for what we represent to each other."

One corner of his lips curled into a beautiful smile, appreciating her words. "So, you think we can make this work?"

Mia smiled, nodding her head. "Yes, I do. We just need to give it time."

He leaned forward, having an overwhelming urge to kiss her. But, instead, he rose from his seat and pulled her to her feet. "May I have this dance?"

She giggled, taken by surprise. "Why, yes, sir," she said, giving him a slight curtsy. "I would be delighted."

There was no music, so he began to sing "Aura Lee".

"When the blackbird in the Spring,

On the willow tree,

Sat and rocked, I heard him sing,

Singing Aura Lea.

Aura Lea, Aura Lea,

Maid with golden hair;

Sunshine came along with thee,

And swallows in the air."

Mia looked at him, her eyes wide. "I didn't know you could sing."

Caleb shrugged. "There are a lot of things you don't know about me."

A smile lit her lips. "Well then, we'll have to do something about that."

She drew closer, sending electricity through him. Caleb spun her around, and then started singing again as he guided her around the living room. He couldn't believe she was so light on her feet. She really was a great dancer. A few moments later, he ended the song with a dip.

He held her as she leaned back and was tempted to kiss her slender neck and then her cheek and her lips. Instead, he lifted her and spun her around and bowed as she curtsied. Then, he moved her hair away and placed his hands on the sides of her face and kissed her forehead as her hands rested on his arms.

"Goodnight, Mia," he whispered, looking deeply into her eyes. Then, he touched her cheek with the back of his hand and smiled. "Thank you for the dance."

She forced a smile as something filled her eyes. He wasn't sure what it was, but it hadn't been there before. "Goodnight, Caleb."

He walked into the bedroom and leaned his forehead against the door after he pushed it closed. Seeing her like that, so beautiful and vulnerable, it was all he could do to walk away. A twinge of guilt filled his heart, but this time, it was a different kind of guilt. It was the guilt of not yet seeing her as his wife. The guilt of taking a wife and then not being a good husband to her.

He knelt by his bed and folded his hands. "Jessica, I think I'm falling in love with Mia. I'm confused, and I need time. You would love her. She's great with the children, and I know she loves them. I hope you understand, but she is what the children and I need. I love you and I always will, but I can love her, too." He let out a deep breath. "Mia said that you can love more than one person, but in different ways. After spending time with her, I know it's true. I know that you would approve of her. She's smart, funny, and full of surprises. Just please forgive me. It doesn't mean that I love you any less, but I'm ready to start opening my heart again. I feel alive with her. She's very special. I hope you understand. I love you, darling."

Then, he sat on the edge of the bed, unable to sleep, not wanting to sleep, energized instead of exhausted from the day of hard work he had put in. Although he enjoyed visiting his parishioners, he enjoyed his time on the farm, as well.

Birthing the calf was rewarding. The cow was having a hard time delivering, and if he hadn't been there, they would have probably lost them both. It just so happened that he was there today. The Lord truly did work in strange ways.

Caleb heard some noises out in the living room. He could have sworn he heard the rocking chair going back and forth against the hardwood floor, and wondered what Mia was up to. Unable to resist, he walked out to check on her, and she was sitting in the rocking chair, sewing.

Caleb smiled. "Mia, you really should get to bed." He leaned against the door facing, watching her sew. "It's getting late."

Mia looked up from her sewing. "You go ahead," she said as she held up a doll's head. "Dolly had a little ‘accident' and I want to fix it before Hailey wakes up."

He nodded as a smile spread across his face and he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "Well, don't stay up too late." He walked back to the bedroom, touched by the gesture. He turned around and watched her, so intent on her sewing. "Goodnight, Mia."

She glanced up and smiled. "Goodnight, Caleb." Then, she went back to her sewing.

This time, when he walked back into the bedroom… he didn't feel guilty at all.