12. Cole

As I satin bumper-to-bumper traffic on the Bay Bridge, I scrolled through my phone in search of the perfect birthday meme before adding it to my message. Since Sara's favorite show was The Office. I chose one of Dwight Schrute with the words: Today is your birthday, in all caps at the top, and then at the bottom, in all caps: False. Today is the anniversary of your birth.

Birthdays were always hard for Sara because Peter had made them so special, and today was a big one. She was turning thirty. I wished I could do more, but with her health, there wasn't much she felt up to doing. This morning, I had to be on-site early, at five, but the good news was I was done by two, so at least I'd get to spend the afternoon with her.

This morning, before I left, I'd filled the kitchen with balloons. I got up an hour early and inflated them all. I'd been sending her memes all day, and before I went home, I was picking up her favorite cake, which was German Chocolate, from her favorite bakery, Sweet Temptations. I was glad it was her favorite, because the owner happened to be married to Alex Vaughn of Vaughn Construction, who was my employer.

Right around the time Peter got sick, Alex's pregnant wife and teenage son were in a tragic accident. They were struck by a drunk driver as they crossed the street. The baby survived, but his son and wife did not.

I didn't know Alex Vaughn personally. I'd met him briefly a handful of times at work functions, but I'd always felt a connection with him. Not only because our families suffered tragedies but also because, like me, he was raised in foster care. But from what I knew of his story, he hadn't had a sister to save him from it.

He and the woman who owned the bakery were newlyweds, and they'd had two children in the past few years. It was strange, I'd actually spoken to his wife, more than him. Since the twins, Carly, and Sara, loved donuts, for a treat, a couple of times a month I'd stop by and pick up a dozen.

As I pulled off the Fremont Street exit, I wondered what Bailey was doing right this moment. I knew her name. I knew her hands were soft. I knew her hair smelled like fresh flowers. I knew she sneezed when she was attracted to someone. But that wasn't enough. I wanted to know everything about her.

I'd tried to look her up on social media, but her Instagram was private. I had taken a peek at Bliss Bridal Boutique's social media, and there were a few photos of her with her sisters, but it was mainly the shots of brides saying yes to the dress, and weddings that they had done, which made sense.

I glanced down at the time. It was half past two in the afternoon. Was she meeting with a bride? Was she on a walk? Was she at a dentist appointment or the DMV? Was she on the couch, binge-watching her favorite TV show? She worked weekends, so it wouldn't be strange if her days off were during the week.

Those questions just led to more questions. Was she a binge-watcher? Did she even like TV? If she did, what was her favorite TV show? Did she like going to the movies? What was her snack preference—savory or sweet? Was she an early riser or a night owl? When did she have her first kiss? How long did it take her to fall in love with someone? Or, more specifically, how long would it take her to fall in love with me? Was she even single?

She couldn't be. Bailey Bliss was the perfect unicorn combination of girl-next-door and sexy. She was kind, hardworking, funny, and sweet. She was the epitome of wifey material.

Not that it mattered. Nothing could happen between us.

After circling the block several times, I finally found a spot across the street from the bakery on the corner. Questions were still flooding my mind as I jaywalked, then headed down the sidewalk toward Sweet Temptations.

Had she noticed me before getting stuck in the bathroom with me? If she had, what sort of impression had I made? Did she notice that I was always on dates with different women? If so, did she think I was a player?

Probably. What other conclusion could she come to? The crazy thing was, I couldn't be less of a player. All I'd ever wanted was to find my person and be with her forever. I'd thought that person was Lindsay, but I'd been wrong.

A bell chimed as I opened the door and walked into the quaint bakery. I was expecting to see Alex's wife, Sadie, behind the counter, but there was a bald man with a head tattoo and nose ring instead.

"Hi, I'm here to pick up a cake for Cole Crawford."

The man smiled and walked into the back. When he returned, he was holding a cake box with a window in it. He tilted it toward me, revealing they'd written Happy 30th Sara on it.

"Looks great! Thanks!"

After paying, I walked out feeling like this wasn't enough. As I crossed the street to go to my truck, I wondered if I should have organized some sort of dinner. I'd thought about reaching out to Sara's school friends, but she wasn't really in contact with them anymore. And because she got pregnant and married so young, then lost Peter and got sick, she hadn't really made a ton of friends in her adult life. Honestly, the nurse at Dr. Miller's office was probably the person she spoke to the most, and that was only because she saw her so much.

"Cole?"

When I heard my name, I lifted my head, and all the air left my lungs. Bailey was standing in front of me. I wondered if she was a figment of my imagination. Maybe the sleepless nights had caught up with me.

"What are you doing here?" she asked as she glanced down at my hands. "Oh, you were getting a cake. Sorry, stupid question."

"It's my sister's birthday." I grinned as I took a breath. She was real. She was real, and she was in front of me. "What are you doing here?"

She pointed above her head. "This is my shop."

I glanced up and saw the Bliss Bridal Boutique sign. I couldn't count the number of times I'd been on this street to get donuts and never noticed it before. Although, in fairness, until two weeks ago, seeing Bliss Bridal wouldn't have meant anything to me because I had no idea Bliss was the sexy green-eyed wedding planner's last name.

"I go to Sweet Temptations all the time, and I had no idea that your shop was here."

"Really?" She smiled. "That's crazy."

There was a moment of silence between us, and, for the life of me, I couldn't think of what to say. Part of what made me so good at being a plus one was that I could talk to anyone. I was never at a loss for words. Except, it seemed, when it mattered most.

The one person I wanted to charm; I was apparently unable to.

"So, does your sister have big plans for her birthday?" she asked.

"Probably just a quiet dinner at home."

"Oh." Her head tilted to the side as her expression softened. "That sounds perfect."

"Not a big party girl, huh?"

"I spend so much time planning big days that having a party just feels like work," she explained. "Plus, I'm more of a behind-the-scenes girl."

"Not a huge fan of being the center of attention?"

"No." She shook her head.

"Not even on your wedding day?" I asked. I wasn't sure why. We weren't talking about weddings. But for some reason, I wanted to know what she imagined her wedding day to be like.

Her eyes widened as she shook her head. "No, I've always…" Her voice drifted off as my phone rang, interrupting her.

Fuck. I hoped it was Timmy, Finn, or Eric, so I could ignore the call. But when I pulled it out, I saw it was not someone I could ignore.

"Hey, birthday girl!" I answered.

"Leo's sick." Sara's voice was strained, and I could tell immediately that she was in pain. "I just got a call from the school; he can't ride the bus because he's throwing up. I was going to pick him up, but I don't think I should dri?—"

"I can be at his school in five minutes."

"Are you sure? How?"

Sara knew I'd been working in Oakland today.

"I'm back in the city."

"Oh, okay, thanks, CJ."

As I hung up, I could see the worry on Bailey's face.

"I have to go. My nephew is sick."

"Oh, I'm so sorry. I hope he feels better."

"Thanks. It was good to see you, Bailey." I hated walking away from her.

"You, too. Tell your sister I said happy birthday," she said as I passed her.

"I will, thanks."

As I headed to my work truck, I wished things were different. Not that I wasn't happy that I was able to be there for my sister, nephews, and niece. I just wished that I could have room in my life for something else, for someone else.