Chapter Four

Blair

For the life of me, I can't figure out what I was so terrified of. I know everyone that is here tonight. They are all older than me and everyone else is here with their Partner, but it doesn't matter. Everyone is friendly and enjoying themselves. Dax and Holden are never far from me, always asking if I'm okay or if I need something.

I watch them interact with their friends and some of the children running around the yard. Everyone is laughing and joking and some of the children are even playing in the pool when it finally hits me. This is what I want. I want to be part of something, not always living on the outside looking in.

I want a home and someone to love me. I may not be able to have children of my own, but I am sure somewhere, there is a child that could do with a good home and someone to love them. I have a lot of love to give, I just don't have anyone to give it to.

My emotions well up inside me and I feel the tears brimming in my eyes. I should just make peace with the fact that I am never going to have this and move on, but my heart cracks open and I rush into the house. Dax gave me a quick tour earlier, but I can't remember a damn thing he said as I make my way down the hallway. I just need to find somewhere to compose myself for a minute.

I remember where the bathroom is but the door is locked so I move past, assuming someone is inside. I hope Dax and Holden can forgive the invasion of privacy as I open the first door on the left and slip inside. Leaning my head against the wooden door I allow my emotions to have their reign for a few moments and the tears slip down my cheeks. I do my best to fight back a sob, not wanting to alert anyone, but I fail miserably as the sound escapes.

"Blair."

No. Not Ford. Please, anyone but him. I can't stand to have him see me like this. Taking a deep breath, I try to regain the composure I only let slip a moment before. I try to dry my tears discreetly before turning to face him.

"Hi, Ford," I say too brightly.

He is sitting in the center of a bed with a guitar across his lap. He isn't wearing a shirt or shoes, only dark jeans that enclose his long, lean legs. His tattoos are on display, but I don't get the chance to appreciate them before he is standing in front of me, his guitar discarded beside the bed.

"Why are you crying?" he asks as he cups my face and stares down at me, gently wiping my cheeks with his calloused fingers. "Did someone hurt you?"

My skin tingles when he touches me as I stare back at him. It's the first time he has spoken more than three words to me in my entire life and I'm struck speechless.

"Blair," he says lowly with a frown creasing his forehead.

My hand has a mind of its own as I use my index finger to smooth out the line his frown has created. "I'm fine."

"You are not fine," he says softly. "You were just crying."

"It's nothing," I say. My hand caresses the side of his face feeling the stubble against my palm.

Ford leans into my touch, closes his green eyes, and releases a sigh. If this is the only chance I'll ever have to be near him, I might as well take it. The entire moment feels like a dream as he steps closer to me, pressing me against the door. I can feel his hard body pressed against mine, the heat of him through my clothes.

"Ford," I whisper as my hand moves to his chest. "What's happening?"

****

Ford

This is exactly why I always stayed away from Blair. Even in high school I always knew I wouldn't be able to resist her. So I just kept my distance. I know she thinks I can't stand her. I've seen the hurt in her eyes when I don't spare a moment to linger on her, but if I look too long I'll want to touch and so much more. Having her touch me now, Blair being here in my roo m— it's too much and I can't keep myself back anymore.

"Blair," I groan, resting my forehead on hers. "You need to leave."

"Why? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, Babe," my voice is raspy. I'm losing control and I won't be able to keep her at arm's length for much longer. "But if you don't leave, I can't be held responsible for my actions."

I pull back from her.

Blair tilts her head back and stares up at me with her beautiful blue eyes. She doesn't know what effect she has on me, Dax, or Holden, which only makes her even more potent. How can someone so beautiful not see the effect she has on the opposite sex, the way everyone stares when she walks into a room?

"What actions?" Her voice is husky and I pray I'm not reading the situation wrong.

My left hand grabs her hip as I tangle my right in her hair and slam my lips down on hers. The taste of vanilla lip gloss explodes across my taste buds along with the wine cooler she must have been drinking. For a moment she doesn't move, and I want to kick my own ass for getting this all wrong. This is why I stayed inside the house instead of acting like I knew how to socialize. I knew I wouldn't be able to stay away from her. The past seven years have been bad enough.

But then something amazing happens and she kisses me back. Her lips and tongue dance with mine as she wraps her arms around my neck.

"Fuck," I groan when I break the kiss.

Looking down at her I can see her arousal clearly. Her blue eyes are dark and stormy, her breathing erratic, her breasts heaving against the confines of her pink top.

"This is why I've always stayed away from you," I murmur.

"What do you mean?" There is pain in her eyes as she softly asks the question.

"I knew if I ever got the chance to touch you, kiss you, I wouldn't be able to let go," I reply before kissing her softly. "But we can't do it this way. We need to talk first. Wait here, I'll be back."