5 Zinnar

I stand in the magnetic shoulder armor of the soldiers of planet Ferrim, and the leather kilt of my kingdom of Jaiban, but Rorlin is dissatisfied.

“You need to wear your royal cloak,” Rorlin says as he hands me the deep red velvet fabric.

“I don’t want to sway them.” I want her to want me for me, not for the promise of money and glory.

“Your father and your people expect you to honor them and represent them with pride. It will be your kingdom one day. Whoever you pick should be able to know that upfront, so she doesn’t feel lied to and can quickly decide if that’s what she wants, too, Prince Zinnar .”

I shake my head, hating that I am forced to represent more than myself. There are so many ways to fail, to get unwanted media attention, to be the victim of gossip started by misunderstandings or emotions of others I can’t control.

“Why do you resist wearing your sigils and your kingdom’s armor? It is your honor. Any other Magnus would do anything to be in your boots.”

I am glad I was not raised in the castle with my father. “Because they do not know the misery of being in this prison .”

“Misery? You live a life of luxury.” He pauses because he knows I elect to avoid all comforts possible to give back to my people. “You could.”

“We cannot provide services to them without funding. Where does that come from?” I challenge.

“A small portion—”

“Small? Are you kidding me?” I stammer.

Rorlin crosses his arms and looks skyward. “You know what I mean. They pay us so we can provide them protection, health services, to bring the quality of life up for all.”

“And yet we are rendered to swords and old fashioned ways when our advanced systems are down or taken, and we’re here at the Abr check-in facility at the people’s expense. I do not agree with this. I would have rather paid out of my soldier’s income.”

“You were taking too long.”

“For my father,” I snort as rage builds. “What about me? What about when I’m ready?”

Rorlin fumes. “You are more selfish than you realize. A king sacrifices everything for his people.”

“Yeah, like his own family,” I retort, pacing the floor of our docked transport. “Look at what that did to us. My mother is long dead, and I despise him. I respect his position, but he is not my father. He created me. I am just an essential tool to continue his reign.”

“You are so bitter.” Rorlin rakes a hand through his hair. “I tried so hard to teach you what I know, train you in combat and politics, and help you value what you have.”

I finally say what I’ve thought for years. “You would be a better king than I ever could be.”

He leans back at my remark. “Never speak those words again. I am not of royal blood.”

“Don’t give a damn. Neither was my mother. She was a half-breed human. Species does not matter. It is what’s in the heart that has led our people and helped us survive. I do not have that,” I say, pounding a fist to my chest. “I do not want to lead.”

A smile cracks on Rorlin’s face. “And that is why you must.”

I groan and cover my face with my hands.

Rorlin throws my red cloak at me. It drapes over my shoulder and connects itself to my armor via strong magnets.

“Our ground to space defenses were not fortified enough to hold off that number of enemy vessels. They want our metals and our electronics. Why do you think that is?”

“Ship repairs, likely. And don't distract me. I don’t want to end up buried in business like my father. When I rule—” Even saying such words turns my stomach. “Things will be different.”

Rorlin nods. “You’re right. He never said that to me as a boy. He’s totally ruined our homeworld.”

I scowl at him.

“There’s this anger in you,” he adds. “Losing your mother made you resentful and vindictive as a child. You have not outgrown it. Just remember to let go of the things you can’t change. Accept it and move on, even if you don’t like it.

“Your mate is going to need someone who can adapt to them as much as she adapts to you. This pissy little child still living in you has to grow up or you’re going to scare off anyone who might have you. Now get on with it.”

Rorlin’s words stick with me as I reluctantly exit the transport, descend the ramp of our ship, and enter the Abr office’s check-in facility. Once I’m signed in and my final paperwork complete, I’m guided to the flag ship, Coalescence, getting ready to launch for Earth.

Rorlin calls me over my badge. “Coms check.”

I tap my earbud. “Check.”

“You have the one for your mate?”

I pat my pocket, my heart thumping hard at the idea of having a female to call my own. “A-firm.”

“Smile,” he replies. “You should be happy today. No more being alone like the rest of us soldiers.”

“I don’t want to leave that life behind. My hands are being forced.”

“For the betterment of the kingdom and its people, I will sacrifice.”

I have never liked the motto of our military.

“Your father has sent two more royal guards to be with us. We will meet you at the complex.”

“Understood.” I tap my earbud off and hike up the ramp to the Abr check-in post.

This isn’t how I wanted to meet the one I’ll spend forever with. I don’t like that I’m being pushed into this before I’m ready. I just haven’t figured a way out. Yet.