Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

Emmett

I sit in the back of The Knotted Barn, watching Sadie ooh and aah over all her gifts. Gillian has had Briar next to her since we walked in together, and Scarlett keeps giving me this knowing smile. Ben is ignoring me, both of our black eyes barely visible anymore, and Jude sits next to Sadie, looking disgruntled as always.

The more I sit here watching them open gifts, the more bitter I become. Everyone in this room should know I'm with Briar. That we've found that something special together. Sure, I'll deal with the shitty comments about how they never thought they'd see the day and I'm not mature enough to be in a serious relationship. They'll all cast their judgments on me, but I don't give a shit because Briar sees the real me. She knows who I really am under my jokester exterior.

Bennett folds himself into the seat next to me, eyeing Briar. "So did you take the step?"

"What?"

He leans in closer. "You know what I'm asking."

I shouldn't tell anyone. Scarlett knows, and Bennett knows that I was entertaining the idea. But if Briar's telling Gillian tonight, does it really matter if Bennett knows?

I nod.

He smiles. "I'm proud of you."

"Because it turns out I was wrong about all the shit I used to say?"

He chuckles. "Yeah. But you took a chance. It's hard to do that. I struggle with it myself." He nods at Wren sitting in front of Sadie, taking each bow or ribbon and putting it in her lap. "She needs a mom, a woman in her life, but I just can't do it. I can't take that step."

The day Bennett buried Kristie, I didn't know what to say. I looked at Darla holding Wren, and I knew exactly what that little girl would miss having in her life. She would only know her mother through stories. I'm nothing like a mother, but I try to be a constant in Wren's life. Her family dynamic might be different than others, but she's loved. Wholeheartedly. I don't ever want her to question that.

Getting closer to Wren helped heal me in a way. It healed the pain I'd always felt because I don't remember my mom when both my brothers have their memories of her. My mom didn't choose to leave. She was taken from us. Just like Kristie was taken from Wren. Aunt Darla and Aunt Bette try to fill that role for Wren. And my dad did a bang-up job of trying to be both for my brothers and me. We were loved. Nothing I could do would ever bring my mom back, so I needed to be grateful because though I didn't have a mom, I had the rest of my family.

"Maybe you're not ready," I say to him.

"It's been six years."

Wren looks over her shoulder, finds her dad, and smiles. He returns her smile, though it's edged with pain.

"Then maybe you just haven't met the one yet."

He chuckles. "So, you believe in soul mates now?"

I shake my head. "Nah, because then Kristie would've been yours."

"She was." There's a depression in his voice I haven't heard in a few years. I think it's why Wren is all about Briar—she's looking for someone to fill that role, and he knows it. But Bennett isn't ready to find someone who could fit into their lives.

"Whoever the lucky woman is who will get to help raise Wren, you just haven't found her yet."

His eyes wander away from Wren and zero in on my dad. "Maybe I'll end up like your dad."

I shake my head. "You're no Bruce." I can't picture Bennett having a different woman in his bed every Saturday night. "Maybe join a group or a club or something. Go out to more places than The Hidden Cave."

He looks at me and leans in a bit. "That reminds me. There was a note on The Canary Wall the other day about you renting out Nick's drive-in for a night to take a woman there. Was it really you, or is it bullshit?"

My gut twists and my eyes focus on the back of Briar's head. I nod.

"And?"

I nod again.

"Well then, I think I should tell you, you're gonna be outed soon. Melvin was in the bathroom, so I wrote a note with a bullshit story about Louise from the county clerk's office and Mr. Torres hiding out in one of the library study rooms."

My eyebrows raise. "You lied?"

He rocks his head back and forth. "Technically it's true, but I don't think anything was going on. But he did have to fix his ponytail after coming out. Wren was waiting for story time to start. Anyway, I put my notecard over the one that was talking about you."

"Thanks, man."

He shrugs. "You'll do the same for me one day."

"Promise."

Briar gets up from her chair and heads to the hallway where the bathrooms are located. This is my opportunity.

"Do me one more favor?" I ask.

"Go."

I slide out of my chair and head toward the bathroom hallway. Briar isn't there, so I assume she's already in the women's bathroom.

I push the door open and peek my head in. "Briar?"

I find her at the sink, blotting her face with a paper towel. She's fucking crying. My chest squeezes.

"What's going on?" I rush over to her, not worrying about if anyone comes in. I wrap my arms around her, pulling her toward me, running my hand over her hair, trying to soothe her as she cries into my shirt. I hope it's just hormones or something. "What's wrong?"

She pulls away a little. "I'm going to be a horrible mother. I don't know what any of that stuff is." I laugh, and her eyes narrow. "It's not funny. Did you see that breast pump? I'm supposed to put those on my nipples and let them suck the milk out? It's horrifying."

"Would you rather I milk you? It's a chore, but I'll do it for you." I shrug.

She pushes me on the shoulder and shakes her head. "Not funny."

"It's kind of funny." I try to make her smile, but she's not having it.

"And all that stuff… how am I going to afford all that stuff?"

"You're going to have a baby shower."

She circles out of my arms. "No one will want to celebrate my baby. Sadie and Jude have loved each other their entire lives. The whole town of Willowbrook is on cloud nine in there. I'm pregnant with a jackass's baby, and he doesn't even know I'm pregnant. People are going to think…" She doesn't finish her sentence.

My head cocks to the side. "Think?"

Her eyes meet mine through the mirror. "You know."

"I don't."

"That I tricked you into this relationship to help me raise my baby because I have nothing. And no one. I love being a yoga instructor, but let's be real, the pay can't support me and a baby. People will say I trapped you."

I lean against the counter so I can look directly in her eyes and not through a mirror. "It's not my baby, so did you trap me?"

She throws up her arms and drills me with a death glare. She knows I have a point. "You know this town. You know I'll be crucified. I saw what happened to my sister when she got pregnant. I just happen to return, move in with you, and suddenly you're in lo—you like me."

A smile tips my lips. "Sorry, what?"

"You know… that you like me."

"Love you," I clarify.

She tears her eyes away. "That was a slip-up."

I wrap my arm around her waist and tug her to me. "So, you think I love you?"

"No," she grumbles.

I dip my head down to meet her eyes. "That's a shame."

She says nothing, and I place my finger under her chin, bringing it up so she has no choice but to look into my eyes.

"Because I do. I love you, Briar."

A shuddering breath leaves her. "No, you don't."

She wiggles out of my hold, but I grab her wrist. "Are you trying to tell me what I feel, sweetheart?"

"I need some air." She pulls away from my grip and walks out of the bathroom.

I follow, and she pushes out the door of the hallway that leads directly outside, the sun casting down on her like a vision. She heads around the corner, not wanting to be seen.

"So, you don't love me?" I ask.

"I…" Her mouth opens and closes a few times before she turns away from me.

"Fair enough. It seems I have more work to do. I'm happy to take on the job." I go to her back, hugging her from behind. "We have this, Briar. I know you feel it too. We're a we. A pair. It's petrifying and some people are gonna talk shit, but we're stronger together." I cradle her stomach. "I know this baby isn't biologically mine, but I will love it as my own. Even if we don't work out and years down the road you discover I'm not the one you want, I'm still going to be a part of this child's life. I will never abandon him or her. I promise you that."

"Emmett," she says softly, leaning her head on my shoulder.

"I'm serious, Briar. Nightly feedings? Sign me up. Putting a crib together? I'm your guy. Diaper explosions? Well… you might have to take those." She laughs, and I squeeze her tighter against me. "I love you and the baby. It's scary that things are moving fast, I know, but I don't think you can deny that what we have is different than anything we've ever had with anyone else."

"I know," she whispers.

I run my nose up and down her neck. "Repeat after me."

"Emmett…"

"Emmett loves Briar."

She shakes her head.

"Say it," I urge her.

She swivels in my arms, bringing her hands up and around my neck. She stares into my eyes. "Briar loves Emmett."

All the air in my lungs rushes out.

She giggles. "I love making you speechless."

"Is that the truth?" I hold my breath, waiting for her answer.

She nods. "I love you, Emmett. As much as that scares me, along with all the unknowns in front of us, I love you, and you're the man I want to share all of this with."

"What's around here?" a woman says.

Briar turns away from me, glancing over her shoulder.

"Hey, you two! Fancy meeting you here." Parker walks toward us in a sundress and heels, her purse hanging off her arm. "Baby, come meet the guy from the video and his beautiful wife."

"Wife?" Ben's voice comes from behind me.

Pop. There goes our bubble.