Chapter 16

Chapter

Sixteen

Icouldn't ignore the loud grumble of my stomach any longer.

I tossed and turned in bed for another minute, trying to keep my eyes closed and savor whatwas leftof the silence and darkness that had taken over the room. It had gotten even darker since I must've drifted off. But I couldn't help it.

I was starving.

Cal lay behind me on the other edge of the bed. He was a careful and likely calculated distance away from me. He clutched the thinnest sheet under his chin, breathing in and out. As I sat up, the softest, most comfortable bed I've ever experienced didn't jostle himat all.

I missed dinner. I must've still been sleeping when Cal checked on meandhe didn't think to wake me up.

Now, it was nearly midnight.

Over the years, I'd gotten used to hunger. Half of the time on my pills, I wasn't hungry much anyway. It wasn't just the hormones that I was suppressing. I was pushing down every primal need and had been doing it without hesitation for years. Now, it felt like I had an animal gnawing on my insides, begging to break free.

Slipping my legs free of the twisted sheets, I carefully slid down the side of the mattress that was a little too high from the floor for my liking.

I made my way to the door and into the hallway. Everyone must've been asleep.

The lights were off in the hall. Only small lamps built into the wall remained on as if for this moment to make my way down the steps. I tiptoed.

It certainly wouldn't beagoodthingif one misstep down the stairs led to an entire household of alphas springing up to see what was the matter.

They probably wouldn'tevenhesitate to scream at me for disrupting their sleeporas I was thinking of leaving theroomthey put me in again.

Being here might've been the better of the evils out there. It didn't seem after all that these alphas wanted to hurt me.

According to what happened back at my apartment with the broodiest alphaof all, it didn't seem that causing my life to becompletely painfulwas on their mind. Liam's hands were soft and didn't grab and push me to do anything or take whatever he wanted like the alphas I always knew would without pause.

He just let me be.

He let me take it. From him.

And though I had given myself quite a few orgasms or near enough to one over the years, while I rubbed against him and he praised me–

My cheeks heated, though the rest of my body had taken onacoolcalm disposition since I slept.

That had to be a good signatleast.

I wasn't actively dying anymore.

Or maybe just dying a little less.

Trying to turn my mind onto more pressing matters than wondering how it would feel to be in Liam's lap again, with or without him wearing pants– and dear god, that was an image– I made my way through the sunken living room towards the kitchen nestled into the alcove beyond.

Though this pack looked more than justintip-top physical shape, I had to believethatthey still had good snacks somewhere.

I saw movement outside the window on my left.

I froze. Was it over that fast? Did someone else find me now that I was an omega? Did they know I was hiding in this house?

My heart hammered in my chest,eyeswentblurry with the sudden spike of fear. Whatever was outside, however, didn't come towards the partially opened French doors, and I took a step towards them.

I turned my head until I could see that the figure outside under the lamp glow was not a masked robber but the largest and most silent of the alphas in the house.

He was the one who first spoke to me when I woke up the other day. He was the one who found me and kept me safe out on the sidewalk outside the club that first night.

Safe.

Marko bent over the flower beds alongside the townhouse.

The sound of cars and the chirps of crickets or late-night bugs seemed far away as I stepped outside on my bare feet. Marko shifted aside soil and rocks and yanked leaves from aroundlines of wilted flowers. Small grunts escaped from the back of his throat from minor exertion as he reached, lifting himself with strong quad muscles as he shifted on his knees.

He must've been outside for some time since the rest of the house retreated to their beds for the night. It looked like he had beenbothfrom the dirt caking his hands and the thin trail of sweat beading along his head. It dripped down his jawline to the pronounced tendon of his neck.

I wanted to lick the sweat of his temple.

I blinked.

That had to be the omega talking.

I took a step back, stepping on a leaf. It crumbled loudly under my toes.

Thelargealpha's head snapped up. His face turned sharpandhis eyes flared. It was such a stark difference to the tired peace that his expression had held only a second ago.

"I'm sorry," I said quickly, though my voice was still slightly hoarse from sleep. "I didn't mean to interrupt you. I was just..."

Marko raised his dark eyebrows. In the low light, they almost hadan auburntint to them.

I looked down at what he was doing, his hands coated inathicklayer ofdirt."What are you doing?"

Looking back down at his work, Marko shrugged. "Clearing out the weeds. No one takes care of it. I do it myself."

"Oh."

He studied me for another moment under his striking hazel eyes beforehe nodded and got backto work.

I shifted where I stood, unsure whether or not I should leave him to it and go back into the house.

Only, I didn't want to.

I watched as he worked for a moment before I lowered myselfdownto the ground.

Grass prickled around my knees, but it felt nice, and my legs were oddly tired. All of me was oddly tired compared tonormal.

Picking at the grass, I looked around. Marko was still intent on his work around the flowers that greatly contrasted with the large and imposing man. They were soft and delicate, even as they wilted as autumn began soon.

He peekedupat me as if he could feel my eyes on him.

I cleared my throat. Maybehewanted me to say something or was uncomfortablewith mejust standing here. "Have you ever thought about planting vegetables or anything?"

"I've done zucchini and lettuce before. We haven't had a chance to make something this past year, Traveling," he clarified before I could ask. I remembered Cal saying that his alphas had been spendinga lot oftime out of town for work or something to that effect. "Do you like to garden?"

I shrugged. "Never have before."

"What would you plant?"

I thought for a minute. "Probably strawberries– maybe. Though, I think I heard once they never grow the first you plant themwhichsounds disappointing."

Marko softly nodded as he continued his efforts. We fell back into silence, but it wasn't awkward exactly. It was easy. Nice, even.It was like I was finally at easewhichmadeabsolutelyno sense as I sat here alone with thislargealpha.

Marko wasexactlythe kind of person I stayed out of sight and out of mind for almost the past decade, and yet now...he did make me feel safe.

I couldn't decide if that was a bad thing.

I shut my eyesfor a momentas I tipped my chin up to the sky.

More time must've passed before I realized. When I opened my eyes again, Marko was in front of me. His eyes narrowedandhe cocked his head at my hazed expression. It didn't help that he was so closeright now to me. His citrus scent was heavy and thick with a tinge of musky sweat from his work outside.

He rubbed his hands off on a towel, all of his gardening tools put away. I blinked a few times, making sure that I was paying attention.

"Why did you come down here?" he asked.

Before I could answer, my stomach growled loudly. I quickly put my hands to my center with wide eyes at the sound. "Sorry. I sneaked down here to look for a snack."

"Why?" he asked, confused.

I shrugged.

Maybe he was right. I should've asked before I went wandering around the house.

Just because they were keeping me safe here so that no one else could find me while my stupid omega hormones ranwild,didn't mean I was free to roam around like a hotel guest. I was sure their control over their alphas could only extend so far with an omega clouding up their house in unintentional perfume.

My cheeks reddened at the thought. I had been an omega ever since I presented, sure. But I had no idea how to behave or control myself like an omega should've.

I was now not only messing up my life but also theirs...

"You don't need to be sorry. You don't have to scavengeeither.You should'vesaid something,"hesaid with a grumble. "I'll make you something."

I hastily shook my head. "You don't have to."

"I will." Marko stood without pause, walking back into the kitchen.

Holding the door open, he waited for me to follow. Unsure what else to do. I did, stepping through the door and into the air conditioning. I noticed how it brought a chill to my arm compared to the humid evening air.

Inside, still no one was upanda gentle breeze came in through the back patio doors. It blustered the sheer curtains.

Marko gestured for a chair on the island. "Sit."

"I can help."

"You already helped me outside, omega."

"How did I help you?" I asked. I was pretty sure ifanythingI was a nuisance out there bothering him. He would've been able to finish if I hadn't bothered him.

"Company."

My company?

"Sit," he repeated as he turned on the sink before scrubbing his hands clean of the remaining loose grass and soil staining his palms. Eyes flickering up to me, he swatted his hands dry before rounding me towards the living room. Before I could say anything else, he pulled a throw blanket off the back of the couch and gently laid it across my shoulders. "Better?"

"Thank you."

He made another gruff noise in the back of his throat. "Do you not like anything?"

I shook my head, biting the inside of my cheek. "Not really."

For a long time, I couldn't really have any opinion. What was cheap and tasted decent were my favorite things to eat.

Marko headed towards the large fridge.

Rufflingthrough thecabinetshe pulled out eggs and some other ingredients from the drawers.Just likeoutside in the garden, I didn't say a word as he worked, mixing eggs into a bowl and dipping bread into the cinnamon-heavy mixture. The moment it hit the pan on the stove, my mouth started to water.

Marko flipped the bread in the pan. It must've been French toast, though I never had it before.

Whenever I managed to eat breakfast, the closest I've ever gotten was pancakes. Yet somehow, Marko whipped it together like it was nothing, going as far as laying out whipped cream and berries on the counter for me before sliding the three slices onto a plate.

When eyes widened.

When I didn't move to grab it, Marko took his time to add toppings before pushing the plate toward me. He handed me a fork. "Eat."

"You like to cook," I whispered. By the looks of it, it wasn't a question. "Like gardening."

"It keeps me focused."

"What are you trying to not focus on?"

Marko paused as he started to clean up. He took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry, " I saidagain,quickly. "You don't have to talk to me."

He shook his head, pointing back down at my plate. "Eat."

Before he could give me another order, I took a piece of French toast smothered in whipped cream and raspberries. I nearly moaned at the flavor. It was amazing.

I quickly took another bite and then a third. I couldn't stop.

I never was this hungry. Ever.

Marko's lips pursed, curving to the side.I wasprettysure that might've been the closest I'd ever seen him smilebefore.

I covered my mouth to hide the sounds I was making. "This is so good."

Marko took another deep breath as our eyes met. "I have some things that I've takena lot ofsteps to move forward from."

"What kind of things?" I asked.Though I didn't want to be rudeandIneeded this place to stay.I was still a little on edge.

Who were these kind alphas willing to take me in where I was staying with now?

Who was I soblindlyable to trust?

"I was..." Marko blinked as he tried to find the right words to explain. Acrease formed between his eyebrows. "In the military, I went on some pretty dangerous missions. I was a POW before I finally retired."

A piece of french toast caught in my throat. "You were captured? Is that what that means?"

Marko nodded.

"For a long time?"

"About five to seven months."

Nowitwas my turn to look confused. "You don't know?"

The crease between his brows deepened.

"There was a bit of blank time in there before anyone found us or declared us missing," he explained. "It wasn't out of the ordinary for us to go radio-silent for a while, but we never had a chance to send out an alert when things started to go wrong. There was a group of us that went on the mission. In the end, only three of us made it back home."

"Do you still talk to your team?"

He looked away. "Last time I saw them was at the third soldier's funeral about a year back."

"Was he injured?" I asked.

"Not in any way anyone could see."

Ah.

I didn't want to say sorry. I doubted that was what Marko wanted me to say, yet I wasn't sure what else there was. "Are you... doing okay now?"

"Yes. The pack made sure of that even when I wasn't,"hesaid,gruffly.

"I'm glad."

"I think I amtoo," said Marko, eyes pouring into mine. "It's good to be backherein the house with all of us together. We've all beena bitout of place for a long time until now with Demetri's job and family obligations."

"Cal said that," I remembered. "But they've been back for a few weeksright?"

He nodded.

"Where were you?"

"Full of questions." Was that almost a smile? I was the only reason I held back an apology. Then, he answered anyway. "I was with them. Then I was visiting with my mothers."

A curve started on my lips. "You were raised in a pack?"

"Small one. Yes," said Marko. "There was my mother and father who were alphas. They also had an omega."

"Your mother wasn't the omega? Biologically, I mean."

"No. Oddly enough. She was infertile after contracting an omega sickness before they diagnosed them more regularly," said Marko. "That was never a problem though for them."

"They loved each other," I put together.

Marko dipped his head.

"I never really understood pack life until I got here andIsaw packs," I said. "From a distanceanyway."

And then, I still didn't understand.

"You weren't raised by alphas then?"

I shook my head. "My parents passed away a long time ago. They were betas. At least, that was whatI was told."

It was rare, after all,for two betas to end up with a prized omega in their midst.

"And you didn't have any other family?"

"I had my brother. He was a beta. He raised me, mainly. He was only about six or seven years older than I wasthough, I"m pretty sure."

Back then, it felt like he was always a strong adult figure in mylifeeven though nowattwenty-six, around the age he had to have been when I last saw him, I realized how untrue that was.

"Where is he now?"

I pressed my lips together and shook my head again. "He..."

He was murdered.

"He died, I think."

"You think?"

"I–" I picked at my final piece of food. While we'd been talking, I practically inhaled the delicious breakfast food. "Honestly, I hope thathe'sdead. After what he did to get me out of ourverytraditional hometown, to say the least...I don't thinkthat anyother option would've been as kind."

Marko studied me.

I took a deep breath, letting the words spill outifonly to fill the painful silence. "Hegot me out of where we grew up after I presented. I perfumedandhe knew. That was all that mattered. He told me gettingmeout of there was all that mattered when he found out what happened to people like me."

To keep me safe.

"People like omegas?"

I nodded.

"You're going to tell me where you ran from, little omega," said Marko.

I shook my head. I forced a small smile for his benefit, but I couldn't. I couldn't go back there. I couldn't even think about it, as if afraid that I would conjure it all back into immediate existence.

Marko leaned against the counter. "I don't understand."

"What?"

"How were you alone all this time?" Markoasked,before cringing. "The suppressants were one thing..."

"I'm rather crafty when I need to be."

"I can tell that you're intelligent. I meant in the beginning. How did you make it here without anyone knowing you were any omega? How did you falsifypaperwork,since that is the only way you didn't leave a trail, correct?"

I rolled my eyes. It wasn't that hard.

"How did you get through your first heat?" Marko asked softly before shaking his head. "You don't need to answer that."

But it was too late. The memory came flooding back into my head, a lot like how it felt back at my apartment when I started to panic about the fever that scorched through myveins,unbidden.

I screamed, hitting my hands at the door when he first locked me in. I sobbed and sobbedmybody on fire and the need...

"I managed," I choked out.

"You were alone."

"I managed." I snapped, hating that was so clear. I pushed away the remnants left on the plate, though I felt like I could still eata whole othermeal. "I'm fine being alone."

"Omegasaren't meantto be alone," Marko mumbled from the other chair.

It was similar to what Liam had said earlier. I wanted to fight.

I wanted to say it again.

Well, this one was.

Instead, I wrapped my arms around myself. I pulled the blanketheput over my shoulders tighter. Because after spending even the past few days in their scent sleeping, I was already unsure if I ever wanted to leave. So maybe, justmaybehe was right.

Though that must've just been my raunchy omega talking again.

Lying.

She really had to get her act together.

"Well, I've gotten rather good at it," I insisted.

"It still doesn't make the rest any less true," said Marko. "The things you've done to keep yourself safe are impressive, but it doesn't mean it's the best wayfor youto live or enjoy your life. Because itis meanttobe enjoyed, most of the time."

"Maybe you should become a therapist."

He snorted, pushing backupto stand and taking my plate to the sink. "Nah, I'm pretty sure I just spouted some shit my therapist said to me. She'd be thrilled."

Marko went to therapy? It shocked me, but an odd pride filled my chest. I never imagined an alpha who would take that kind of thing seriously, but I guess he had to.

We both had to do difficult things to make sure we stayed alive.

"So, what will it take?" he asked.

"What?"

"What will it take to make you feel safe now?" Marko rephrased. "Now that you are off your suppressants and staying here. What will it take?"

"I don't know," I said. "It's always just been me. I want to be sure I can defend myself and save myself still. I don't...need you."

I thought it was a bit of a blow, but Marko only nodded. "I can show you some basic self-defense– once youare feelingbetter. You can at least stand a chance against your monsters then."

"Really?"

"Once you are feeling betterand getthe all-clear," he repeated.

I nodded. "Okay. Deal."

He nodded once more before trailing around the counter without a wordheadingdown the hall without question.