Chapter 20

Chapter

Twenty

ELLA

J ust when I figured maybe it would be best just to dig myself a hole in the mud and die there against the Omega Academy residence hallways. I could only stand being inside for approximately three minutes after Jessica dropped me off before everything felt too close. Too claustrophobic. Too much .

I wandered outside to feel cold air press against my cheeks when the rest of me felt overly stifling, I caught someone I was pretty sure none of the guards noticed, hiding in the bushes.

"Lucas?" My eyes widened at the sight of him.

He rushed towards me.

"What are you doing out here?"

"You're crying."

I shook my head like I was going to deny it. But, what was the point? "That didn't answer my question."

Using the backs of my firsts, I swiped at my face. I had given up any pretense of being fully together and strong, but I didn't want him to see him like this. God, I didn't even want to see myself like this. I didn't want to see myself like any of this anymore.

Who even was I? I felt like the woman I had become had all been thrown out the window and now I was back to being a simpering omega who had no idea what she was doing.

I always knew what I should do.

I never felt more lost.

A thickness crawled up my throat as I shook my head over and over again.

"Ella." Lucas's voice turned soft, sad. I shook my head again, but Lucas was already there, wrapping his arms around me. "It's okay. You can cry."

I don't know how I held in the sob that escaped my chest for so long. Lucas only held onto me tighter. Humming… or not humming.

He was purring.

Lifting my face from where I pressed it against his chest I looked at him with wide eyes. "Lucas."

"Sorry."

I shook my head again. What was happening tonight?

At that moment, I looked around, suddenly realizing where we were standing. Anyone could walk by and then it wouldn't just be me in trouble for being out so late.

"We need to go," I said.

"You say where and I'm there."

We ended up back in my dorm room.

Lucas sat on the edge of my bed. He held the pillow I shoved into his lap when he arrived. The moment I offered him one, his face lit up like a boy on Christmas, so pleased that I was offering it to him. I noticed the way he tucked his nose down into it too, breathing in a thick drag of my scent.

The reaction made my heart swell in my chest with something strange like pride that he liked my pillow. My nest.

Me.

The painful rejection I felt from earlier still stung, but oddly less so now that I stood in front of Lucas who felt like a sweet anchor, holding me to reality and I didn't want to leave him.

I still wondered what the Prestford Pack would've thought of him. They'd have to like him of course.

I did.

If his legs weren't so long, I was certain that he would be swinging his legs back and forth in front of me, watching me as I hid behind the wardrobe door to change out of the beautiful dress Lidya let me borrow and back into more comfortable sweats.

I knew that he shouldn't be in here, but for some reason, I felt like I would burst back into tears if he left.

Just like everyone else left me.

"You're making me anxious here, babe."

"Babe?"

The corner of his lips curved, "Too soon? Or should I come up with a pet name? I'd have to think of one and I've never been creative off the top of my head." He snapped. "Oh, sweet berry pie? Nah. Too long."

Beautiful.

My heart ached to remember Cal.

"I'm sorry," Lucas stammered as he took in my withering expression again. "I didn't mean to make you upset. I'll cut it out with the nicknames."

I shook my head. "No. It's not."

"What happened tonight? Did something go wrong? I didn't think that you would be back so soon from the event," he said, trying to guess all the things and watching me to see if any of them stuck.

They all sort of did. "Is that why you were in the bushes?"

"Well, I was trying to make my way to the courting event to check in on you. I had this awful feeling in my chest like something was wrong and so I just… I had to see you. Sorry if that makes me sound a little stalker-ish."

"No," I said. "It's ok. I just…"

"Was it that guy? The one who said thinks that you're his?"

"Technically I am."

"You're not anyone's." Lucas snarled the words with such venom my heart stopped. There was anger on his face, lip curling with distaste until he noted my widened eyes. "It just kills me that anyone thinks that you're theirs. You're not. You are yours and… You deserve to make your decision just like anyone else. I don't like it."

"I'm not a huge fan of it either," I agreed. "There is also…"

I felt like I was going to die as I even thought about telling him. What would he think of me , my omega pounded with sadness in my chest. Knowing that was I rejected?

"What?"

"There's more." Just a single word. "More than I didn't tell you before."

"Okay." He took a deep breath. "Tell me now."

"I had a pack."

He blinked. "A pack?"

"Before I came here with everything, I met a beta and he had a pack."

"What pack?" Lucas asked again.

"Do you know of the Prestfords?"

Slowly, he nodded. "Of course I do. I mean, not personally or anything. I know they own like half the city and the university in the middle of it."

That was them.

"We're going to figure this out."

"You still…"

"I want you Ella. No matter how you have me, I want you as a friend or…" I knew what he was saying. Maybe he was finally starting to see how outlandish even the thought of him getting his happily ever after with an omega like me was.

He swiped a finger over my cheek until he was cupping my face in his hands and pulling me so I stood pressed up against him and my pillow. His thighs were braced on either side of my hips. "I'm going to help you however I can. Because I can't stand to see you cry. One day I want to put a smile on that face."

"You mean that?" I asked, still feeling vulnerable and broken from everything that happened this evening.

He grinned, offering me a taste of the joy he had in store for me one day if he had it his way. "Promise."

"What is going on here?" Lidya asked, shock all over her face. She didn't even bother to hide her awe-struck expression as the door swung open and quickly closed again, sealing us all inside.

The bubble between me and Lucas broke. I took a step away from him, though his one hand remained on my wrist, gently stroking the skin back and forth. Was he imagining his bite, right there?

I could imagine it.

Could we just…

My body started to heat again as I took a few deep breaths. No, of course not. We couldn't. If we did, I couldn't imagine the kind of consequences that would have. With Demetri and the backing of the Prestford pack it was one thing, but I wouldn't do that to Lucas.

No matter how much I… or he by the fire flaring in his eyes, catching the abrupt change in my scent, wanted to.

I tried to re-focus on Lidya who was staring at me in horror.

"What?" I asked. Had she said something else that I missed?

She gave me a pointed look, then she pointed at Lucas.

He offered her a short wave, not letting go of me, or losing the balance of my pillow still perfectly placed in his lap.

I felt a smile creep up at the corner of my lips once more at the sight.

Lidya's eyes widened, looking between the two of us. Quickly, she closed the door, her voice lowering into a shocked whisper. "What's he doing here?"

"I just… I couldn't leave him outside."

She balked. "Who even is this?"

"Lucas."

"Lucas?" She repeated. "The class partner alpha friend you talk about?"

"Nice to meet you," said Lucas.

Lidya completely ignored him. "He was outside? Here? At the residence halls? How did he even… Here?"

"Yes," I answered like it was no big deal, making my way back across the room towards him and away from Lidya's confused frustration.

Her voice hurt my ears a little.

"How did you even get him in this building, Ella?" she asked, tone high-pitched and stringy. I didn't understand why she was panicking about all of this. Then again, I did have another alpha in her room so I guess I did understand a little.

It was kind of rude of me. I just hadn't thought about it all until now.

"We walked in," I offered, slightly more meekly.

"There are guards everywhere on this campus and you just walked in?" she asked, enunciating each word.

I shrugged. So did Lucas. Both of us remained the pictures of calm it appeared to Lidya, which only served to make her mouth drop wide open into an "O" as she stared at both of us.

"What are you doing?"

"They must be busy still watching the courting dinner?" I offered.

"No," Lidya clarified. "He needs to leave. Now."

I paused. He probably did. I understood where she was coming from but I didn't want… I couldn't…

Tears started to press in on the corner of my eyes again.

Lucas was immediately standing. He took two steps to me, dropping my pillow to wrap me back into his arms and pur. I took a deep breath from him and felt like I was being wrapped in a warm maple hug. I wanted to fall into his scent and never get out.

My heart rate started to slow.

He murmured gently in my ear, stroking my hair like I was something precious.

It had been a little while since I felt that way. I grasped onto him, holding tight.

"It's okay. We'll figure all of this out. You just need to take a few deep breaths. I'm not going to let what is going on happen to you."

I still didn't understand how that happened so suddenly.

"Oh shit," Lidya said from where she stood with her back still against the door. For the first time, I think she started to notice just how close we were standing and how much I didn't mind. "You said he was a friend."

I blinked, still holding him as I turned to face her a little better. "He is," I said, my voice slower and a little drowsy as if I had taken a sleeping pill.

She made a strangled sound waving her hands between us. "Are you two scent-matched?"

"Maybe," said Lucas.

Scent matched?

"I kind of thought so since the first day I met her and it just felt… right."

"Scent matched?" This time I managed to ask the question out loud.

"It makes sense," he said. "Doesn't it?"

I thought of all the times when I felt most safe when I was with Lucas in the classroom and how that was the only time of day I looked forward to. I thought about how when the class was over, sometimes it felt like I was being physically ripped out of my body. I had figured it was just my heat all the time acting up, but no… It was him.

My heart stuttered in my chest. My omega cheered a sad cheer after everything tonight I was coming to my senses.

Finally, I was listening to her.

Lucas was a scent match. Just like Liam was in the Prestford pack.

I swallowed roughly.

"I don't know much about scent matches exactly, and I don't care either way," Lucas told me and Lidya at the same time. "I… like Ella. More than like her. She's mine."

I blushed and wanted to scream in sorrowful upset all at once. Happiness and also sorrow flooded through me. It was that easy. And also, it was that easy for Demetri to throw me away. To reject me.

Everything was so confusing. I dropped my face into Lucas' chest.

"Shit," my friend repeated.

He wrapped his arms tighter around my waist, keeping me firmly in his lap as my heart rate started to decline back to normal. It was weird just how much I wanted to nestle up against his chest and then arched myself towards his throat right where he smelled so perfectly like… there.

"If you bite him right now, I swear I'm going to riot," said Lidya. "Girl, you have so many issues already. I need you to hold it together. If he is here we need to figure this out now then."

I pulled my face back.

Lucas was smiling and flushed. "She was going to bite me?"

Lidya cocked her head. "You're clueless. You had to choose another clueless alpha?"

I sighed. "Demetri was there tonight."

Lidya's eyes widened. "No. He couldn't be."

I shrugged. He was.

"But the other day when we checked in on the pack they were…"

Distraught? A mess? Unfit for socialization?

I vaguely remembered the terms used to describe them, but none of them looked how Demetri Prestford looked tonight, so perfectly pressed and out to make friends with Benjamin Davinson and maybe take one more try at finding a polite, perfect omega like they always wanted.

While I was just the omega that maybe for a moment they figured they'd let fall into their laps. Until that didn't work out.

Lucas started to pur again, feeling my sorrow.

He squeezed my hands. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Tomorrow. I nodded, swallowing as I tried to piece myself back together and stand up straight. We'll go over what we'll do then. I'm not leaving you now that I know what we have is real, Ella."

"Okay."

"Okay." Leaning in, Lucas kissed me on the cheek. It felt so sudden and so chaste, that I giggled. "I plan on coming back for more. Get some good sleep ok. We'll figure this out. I promise."

I shut the door and shut my eyes for a second now back inside the room. My head felt so full.

"So that's one crisis averted for now," Lidya said. I opened my eyes to find her looking at me across the room. "I take it that tonight didn't go as well as you mentioned?"

I shook my head. "Worse than well."

I told her everything.

"So I also take it that you really wouldn't accept my alpha to bond to if worse comes to worst?"

I shook my head at her again, letting out a deep breath. "It was never an option. I wouldn't do that to you or your alphas. Ever."

She sighed. "And here I was just getting used to the idea of having an omega partner in crime for the rest of my life."

I gave a watery chuckle. "Is it too late to run and try to start a new life again?"

Lidya pursed her lips. At that, she did look slightly sad.

Maybe she regretted stopping me all those nights ago when I first arrived, thinking that I could've done better. And now, we've committed to worse unless something, anything could change it.

"Afraid so."