Chapter 3

Chapter

Three

Ileft the library to make my way across campus a few minutes before I was supposed to meet Rita for lunch. I paced back and forth in the spacious entryway of the science building before walking upstairs towards where I knew the lab where she spent most of her time was, though she could've been teaching a class today.

I forgot to look this morning at the calendar she kept in the kitchen for me.

My head was all over the place lately.

Only when I made it to the second floor, my phone beeped… with a text message from over an hour ago.

Blame it on the library basement blocking my messages or the fact my phone could barely hold a call most days, but this was not its first problem. I huffed.

Rita: Can't make it to lunch today. Dinner at home?

No problem. See you then.

Turning around, I made my way back towards the wide staircase as I glanced down at my phone.

I still had the link to the place where I did buy my pills the last time I was lower than I'd prefer.

Maybe that was why Rita was busy today. Could she not get a hold of the person who had been supplying the suppressants for the past two years?

If she couldn't get them for me, I needed to make sure that I could get them from somewhere else. It didn't matter whether or not they may have been the safest option. Or least expensive. Getting them shipped discretely would nearly cost me double what I had been paying Rita's friend before, not only for the supply but for the risk.

My heart clenched again at the thought of it.

I was putting myself at risk, sure. That was something I was used to. I lived that way. But every time this fear happened; I couldn't help but feel the thick guilt that coated my lungs.

I was putting Rita at risk too.

I brushed my knuckles under my chin, scratching a line of skin down my jawline. I felt itchy and this building felt like it must've been built on top of an ice cooler.

Before I could take the first step, the itchiness stretched further down my spine. A sharp ringing screeched through my ears. My heel didn't immediately find the ground.

I fell forward— Only, I didn't hit the ground though for a second I thought I must've blacked out.

My body collided with a hard surface. A wall? No. It was a chest.

I gripped onto whoever the hard body belonged to, trying not to collapse. With it, I couldn"t help myself but inhale a deep breath, gathering the words to apologize.

Instead, my eyes fogged with the immediate sweetness that filled my nose.

Caramel and something spiced I couldn't put my finger on rocked me. I tried to find my footing.

I want to lick it.

No.

Don't lick the alpha.

Alpha. I was touching an alpha.

My entire body screamed with its spectrum of instinctive horror, and worse—instinctive delight.

"Watch where you're going." A voice snapped.

The stark tone was enough to bring me back to reality.

I wasn't sure where I went, other than to a single thought as I looked up into the man in the nice suit I was still currently gripped onto.

His icy blue eyes were piercing.

There was no doubt as my brain screamed, trying to latch onto the man's scent like it was my own personal buffet. It was just like back in the library earlier when I met Mr. Wolfern. The knowing. Only it was more.

So much more.

Hastily, I pushed him away and took a step back to the stairs.

The tall man's eyes flared, ringed with thick dark eyelashes that barely blinked as he looked at me. His hair was a lighter brown, streaked with gold, disheveled from eyeglasses shoved up over his forehead. He was the picture of all angles and dark academia. He reached back out to grab me once more before I went backward down the staircase.

I tried to reorient myself.

His hands still touched, bracing my forearms, and didn't let go.

They didn't leave my buzzing skin. Not until I hastily stepped back. This time, I managed a safer location where I wasn't about to crack my head open.

That would be very bad publicity for the university.

I rubbed my elbow, averting my gaze. "Sorry."

"Be careful what you're doing," snapped his sharp tenor. "Now I'm late for a meeting."

"Sorry," I repeated, not turning my back.

I quickly made my way away from the man that smelled toe-curlingly sweet, and down the stairs. I was back outside under the sun, slowly thawing whatever chill came over me back there.

I just felt... off.

Even if?—

Everything was fine.

I took another deep breath, but it was as if I could only smell the alpha in my airways anymore.

Chai and spices and a sweet something that I couldn't quite put my finger on yet.

And I never would.

A heavy feeling, a whine built in my chest and I slapped my hand over the space.

Everything was completely fine. It was.

I told myself this over and over again because it had to be– even as the world started to swirl all around me and my eyes turned up to stare at the too-bright, too-sweet, too blue sky.