Chapter 22

Chapter Twenty-Two

Jess immediately felt the need to bolt. She flinched. Kevin's arm tightened around her waist, his lips now pressed to her neck like a brand.

She snapped her eyes shut and took a deep breath. Then another. Then another.

"Good job, sweetheart," he murmured into her neck.

They remained silent for a couple of minutes, giving Jess time to sift through all of her complicated feelings. He drew circles on her stomach with his thumb, her T-shirt lifting with each stroke.

"M-move upstairs?" she finally asked, her voice cracking.

"I don't have enough room for two beds up there," he confessed. "We could save up and once we have enough, we move somewhere together."

"You want to wait?"

"No, I want to have you now ," he confessed, kissing the soft spot under her ear. "But I also want you to be comfortable and have what you want. And if that means we wait to find you the perfect home, then I will wait."

Jess turned to face him, curling her legs up by his side. "If that's what you want, then why did you say you were going to ask me to move in with you. Did you change your mind?"

"After everything that happened last week with your family, watching all of the ways the four of you were hurting, I knew I couldn't do that to you again. I couldn't ask you to be ready for something that you so clearly told me you didn't want. And you'd just said all of that stuff about commitment and feeling stuck—"

"Do you think that? Do you think we'll feel stuck?"

Kevin tucked a strand of her blonde hair behind her ear. "I think it's normal in every relationship for those initial sparks to fade. We'll have to work hard to create new sparks, find new ways to bring excitement into one another's lives, to keep the flame ignited." He gave her a coy smile. " But , I also am absolutely certain of one thing, with all of my heart."

She blinked. "And that is?"

"That I will never, ever stop loving you. And I will never ever neglect you. You will always feel loved and cherished by me. Because I believe in us, and I will live out all of my days giving you a life that you deserve."

"But doesn't that scare you?" She whispered the question so softly, it felt like a secret. "Aren't you scared of having to sacrifice that much for another person?"

"Nope."

He was so sure of himself, his blunt refusal sucking the air from her lungs.

"I'm not afraid. I know my girl is going to take care of me, too."

She grunted and crossed her arms. "And what makes you so sure that I will?"

"Jessica, why do you bring me a kanelbullar every day?"

She gave him a You have to be joking me face. "Because you like it?"

"Even when you're pissed at me and we're not talking to each other, though? You still want to bring me a pastry?"

"Well, yeah." She shrugged, then hesitated as it hit her. The point he was trying to make.

Kevin chuckled, wiggling his hands into her elbows and prying her arms open, pressing himself as close as possible. He brushed his nose against hers with a smile, his hazel eyes dancing with mischief.

"We sacrifice because we want to, sweetheart. Not because we feel like we need to. We sacrifice because we love one another."

She stiffened at the use of the big L word.

"Did you mean it when you said it the other day?" he asked softly.

"It slipped right out."

"But did you mean it?"

She inched her face back, looking down at her golden boy. His tire grease-stained bandana tied at his neck, his deep tan and pearly white teeth, his wavy hair with streaks of blonde from the summer sun.

"Yes," she breathed. "I love you, Kev."

He wept. Jess smiled at his big, soft emotions after her confession and kissed away his tears as he held her tightly, then planted a lingering kiss on his lips. His hands moved fast, running through her hair and cupping her face, kissing her back with intensity and purpose. Like she was the answer to a prayer. Because that's what he was for her. It wasn't an apartment, a house, or even a bakery that gave Jess the freedom and the comfort she craved so deeply. No, it had always been him. With Kevin, Jess felt like she finally found the person who truly connected to her soul.

Jess nestled closer to Kevin and kissed his chin. He purred, dragging his fingers through her hair slowly, the bedsheet sliding down her shoulders. She shivered from the chill in his bedroom. He lifted the sheet and tucked her in close, their bodies pressed together, his skin warm, his breath smelling like cinnamon sugar from the kanelbullar she'd watched him devour.

She peered around his room. "There isn't even room for a dresser in here."

"Yeah, my clothes are in the hall closet."

"Hmm," she rumbled. She traced a finger down his ivy tattoo. "We'd probably have to put a dresser in the living room then."

Kevin shifted and moved on top of her, bracketing his arms by her sides. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"

She scrunched her nose. "I don't know. I'm thinking through the options."

He beamed. "Tell me the options."

"You have a pathetic excuse for a kitchen."

He barked out a laugh. "That's fair. We could use the kitchen downstairs?"

"Not if we change the space and move all the baking to Grampy's."

He shrugged. "We'll probably have some time before all of those changes."

She puffed out a frustrated exhale, which had him laughing again.

"Tiny bathroom," she continued. "Not enough room for the girly things."

He wiggled his eyebrows. "What kind of girly things?"

She swatted his arm. "Why must you always make it weird?"

"Because you set it up so easily!"

Jess attempted to shimmy out of his grasp but he pressed his body against hers, refusing to let her move. She sighed, running her index finger down his jaw.

"What else?" Kevin asked. "Does sleeping in the same bed really bug you?"

She sighed. "What if we compromise?"

"See, Jessica? You're sacrificing already. I'm proud of you."

Her face flushed. "Instead of two beds, let's just get one big one. California King. Enough room to spread out if I need it."

"But still the same sheets in case you need me ."

She rolled her eyes.

"Anything else? TV too old? You hate my selection of shampoo?"

She shook her head. She felt a warm hand run up her thigh, fingers inching up the curve of her waist, his smile taunting.

"What are you doing?" she asked, her voice throaty and breathless.

"Giving you another reason to move in with me."

"Oh, I'm already well aware of this reason ."

"And it's not convincing enough?"

She wiggled her toes. "It's pretty close."

His chest rumbled with a chuckle. He leaned down and kissed her, his kiss transitioning from soft and sweet to hot and urgent in a matter of seconds, the press of his body on hers deepening the desire in her belly again.

In an instant he stopped and came up for air. "How about now? Convincing enough?"

She whined. "That was fresh."

"Oh you haven't seen how fresh I can be, sweetheart."

She growled at him. His bright laughter filled the room. Jess couldn't help the smile that bloomed on her face at the sound of it, at the way he rolled over and tugged her with him, her body now on top of his, his hands roaming down the small of her back and to his favorite…asset.

"So what's it going to be, my dear Jessica?"

She traced her finger down his forehead, around the curve of his nose, down to his lips. "I think I can handle a few months in this tiny apartment with you."

He grinned. "I take back what I said."

"Which time? You say a lot of things."

"About New York being the best day of my life." He cupped her face. "Because this beats it by far."

For the longest time, Jess thought being in a relationship with someone was similar to being locked up in jail. The kind of jail that didn't allow her to explore who she truly was and what she wanted in life, having to sacrifice so much in an effort to simply be together.

But with Kevin, those bars never came back, never sealed her back in. With him, she was free . He encouraged her to explore and to have fun. Instead of making her small, he challenged her to be bold and brave, to be a better version of herself. And he loved her with such a ferocious intensity. His laugh, his need to constantly touch her when she was close by, his words of adoration in her ear, his hands exploring her late at night.

As the last days of the summer season in Haverport breezed by, as they boxed up her few belongings at the Balls' cottage and moved them to the small apartment above the shop, she reminded herself of his words. Yes, the sparks might fade. Yes, she might not feel that same intense longing, that those feelings might evolve over time. But that didn't mean they weren't meant for one another.

I will never stop loving you , he'd told her. I will never neglect you.

Charlie neglected her, and if Jess was being totally honest with herself, she also neglected him. They fell out of love. They tried to stretch out their relationship for as long as they could, like taking a handful of dough and stretching it to the limit. But they hadn't tried to form it into something new, form it into something beautiful. That it snapped apart was inevitable.

Jess folded her jeans and tucked them gently into their new dresser, smiling at the framed photo of the three of them next to a pitcher of fresh flowers. It was a selfie from a couple of days earlier, Honey tucked into her arms, Jess tucked into Kevin's. They were laughing at some absurd joke of his before snapping the photo, and he'd framed it immediately.

"The start of everything ," he'd said as he handed her the frame, a bouquet of sunflowers clutched in his other. The flowers had somehow ended up on the floor…and so did their clothes.

She slid the dresser drawer closed, then in an instant, felt those warm hands snatch her waist and spin her around. Kevin pressed against her, dipping his chin and sealing his lips to hers. His hands slipped inside her tank top and slowly made their trail up her stomach.

Jess chuckled and broke apart. "If you keep doing this, we're never going to get things done."

He grinned. "Are we in a hurry?"

"Today? Yes."

He smiled at that, cupping her face and kissing her nose. "Are you still up for it?"

She closed her eyes and nodded. "Yes. I need to do this."

"Do we need to do our breathing exercise?"

Jess smiled, really smiled. At the boy who knew her so deeply. It didn't take nine years to get here. Time didn't seem to matter when it came to true love.

"No," she answered honestly. "I'm going to be okay, as long as you're with me."

He hummed as he curled his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into a hug. "With you is the only place I want to be."

Jess bumped the car door closed with her hip, balancing a tray of tomato mozzarella focaccia in her hand. Kevin reached for her as she made her way from the passenger side, and she interlaced her fingers through his. The tags on Honey's collar clinked against the metal clasp on her leash as she jumped up and down, exploring her very new surroundings as the three of them ambled up the steps of the porch.

Kevin squeezed her hand, released it to knock on the door, then threaded his fingers back through hers. She squeezed back, her heart pattering in her chest as she heard soft footsteps pad toward the door.

Dakota swung it open, rubbing her belly. "Sissy! You guys are here!"

Jess smiled. "We did say we were coming."

"Yes, but I almost didn't believe you when you said we ." Dakota flicked her gaze down to their interlaced hands then back up to her sister. She winked.

Jess rolled her eyes as Dakota made room for them to step into the house.

"You look radiant, Dakota," Kevin said as she closed the door.

"I look like a whale."

"No you don't, stop that," Jess said. "Piglet would be offended."

Kevin made a Did I just hear that correctly? face. Dakota's bright laughter filled the hallway.

Jess grinned at her sister. "He's right, sissy. You are glowing with happiness."

"There's a lot of things to be happy about right now."

Dakota gave her a watery smile, and to Jess's surprise, she pulled her into a hug.

"Do I smell oregano?!" boomed a voice from the kitchen.

Kevin snatched the tray in Jess's hands and made his way to the kitchen. "What you smell is actually the best thing you're about to eat in your entire life."

"Kevin! My boy!"

Jess sucked in a breath, listening to her father and Kevin greet one another with cheers, hugs, slaps on shoulders, and all things focaccia.

Dakota gathered up Jess's hair and twisted it out of her face, letting the strands fall softly to her back. "Are you going to be okay?"

"I think so." She nodded. "Taking one day at a time."

Dakota grinned. "I'm so proud of you."

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get here," she admitted. "I'm sorry we never spoke and I missed so much."

"I'm sorry, too," her sister whispered. She linked her arm with Jess's. "I'm ready to make up for lost time, are you?"

"Desperately."

"Then let's do this."

"For Piglet."

Dakota snorted.

"We should have made the baby shower pig themed, a missed opportunity really," Jess teased as they made their way to the kitchen. "Should I buy pig sheets for the crib?"

"I missed you too, Jess."

They stepped into the kitchen to the sight of Kevin and her father picking up slices of the focaccia, ready to devour. They both froze before taking a bite.

Jess frowned. "That's supposed to go with dinner."

"But can't it be an appetizer?" Kevin whined. "Logan is about to have his whole life changed!"

Jess eyed her father, watching the smile she'd missed for five years curl into his left cheek, new wrinkles crinkled at the corners of his eyes that she never experienced before. So much lost time.

And Jess was finally, finally ready to make up for it.

"Yeah okay, appetizer is fine."

They both took greedy bites. Her father groaned at the taste, shoveling another bite into his mouth.

"See! I told you!" Kevin cheered, his mouth also half full.

Dad swallowed and nodded fervently as he placed his slice down on a napkin, then patted Kevin's back. "I think a lot of my life is going to change today, my boy."

Jess shifted from foot to foot, unable to think of any kind of response to that. Her mother slid open the glass back door, the smell of buttery clams and potatoes and corn wafting into the kitchen as Jasper poked at the foil packs on the grill. "Dinner's rea— Logan! What are you eating?"

Dad frowned as everyone else laughed. "Jessie brought her focaccia! I've been dying to try it."

"Would you like a slice, Mrs. Valerie?" Kevin asked politely, lifting the serrated knife to cut her a piece.

"Thank you but no, I will be waiting for dinner. A concept my husband doesn't seem to understand."

Kevin and her father scoffed, then looked at each other and laughed.

"Oh god," Jess whispered to her sister. "Did I start dating… Dad?? "

Dakota squealed. "You guys are officially dating ?"

"Yeah," she admitted, twisting her mouth to contain her own grin. "Do you think it's too soon? You know…after everything?"

Her sister shook her head, then looked at her intensely, her brows knitted together. "Do you love him?"

She nodded. "Yes. Very much."

"Good," Dakota replied. "Because the way that boy looks at you…sometimes I think that gaze will melt everything in the room."

Jess peeked up at Kevin, and sure enough, he was looking at her with those bright hazel eyes, lingering on her lips. She blushed, then stuck out her tongue, which had him laughing as they were shepherded out to the porch.

"Am I allowed to know how the shop is doing now?" her father asked.

Kevin slipped a hand around her neck and rubbed a thumb down her nape. She turned to face his reassuring smile. He was already aware of the conversation she had with her father weeks prior. When Dakota texted her days before and invited her to dinner, Kevin encouraged her to say yes. Then declared he was going with her.

He nodded, his expression and his thumb stroking her neck soothing her soul. How she ever thought she could do this without him baffled her.

Jess turned back to her father and answered his question. "Someone offered to buy the shop."

Dad furrowed his brow. "Who?"

"Grampy."

The shocked expressions around the table were identical to the ones she'd received from the Scoopers on the beach. With a smile, Jess told her story again, then explained the beginning plans of their transition and renovations to the shop.

"This gives us the opportunity to have more tables for people who want to hang out with a coffee or a bite, and lingering bodies also mean lingering eyes—"

"And then everyone buys my bikes," Kevin butted in.

Jess chuckled and squeezed his thigh.

"But you'll be working at Grampy's?" her mother asked.

"I'll be running Grampy's."

"That's so cool," Jasper commented.

"Do you really know how to bake that blueberry coffee cake?" Dakota blurted.

Jess grinned. "Yes."

"How wild ."

"So some of the inventory at Grampy's, or whatever you decide to call your bakery, will go to the new café at Port Wheels? Nothing will be baked there?" Dad inquired.

She nodded. "Precisely."

"Who's going to run the café then?"

Jess and Kevin looked at one another. He nodded, encouraging her to keep going, to follow through with the plan they'd discussed in meticulous detail.

She squared her shoulders and looked at the man she'd believed was lost to her, and did the one thing she never thought she would do.

She asked him for help.

"We were hoping you would step in as the manager for the café," she said. "If you still want to work with us, of course."

Dad arched a brow and leaned back into his chair. "Me?"

She and Kevin nodded. Everyone remained silent, eyes on her father, watching as he tapped his fingers on his knee, thinking it through.

Kevin coughed. "We don't need an answer now. We wanted to invite you to the shop first and hear our plans. We'll have dinner at our place and discuss."

" Our place ?" Dakota chirped.

Jess felt her face get hot as four pairs of wide eyes settled on her.

"Y-yes," she replied softly. "I moved in with Kev."

To her shock, everyone around the table seemed relieved. Her mother beamed, curling a hand around her father's knee. Dakota held a hand to her mouth and tried to contain her excitement, Jasper kissing his fiancée on the forehead with a smile. Silver lined her father's eyes, his face full of joy. Like the storm was finally over.

Her chest tightened as she beheld her family, realizing how much hurt she'd caused them. How much hurt they'd caused her . How much history and feelings they had to sift through together. She knew this dinner and inviting her father to work with them wasn't nearly enough. But it was certainly a start. A new beginning.

And lately, as she sat next to her golden boy, she realized she really, really liked new beginnings.