Chapter 20

Chapter Twenty

"You're making me nervous, Kev."

She attempted to reach for his hands, but he pulled back.

"Please," he said. "Let me get this out first."

She huffed and crossed her arms. "Spill it already."

He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes trained on the fabric of her dress at her knees. "Earlier this year, during the offseason, a man came into the shop and asked me to fix his bike. So I did, and we got talking."

She felt her stomach sour. Why does he have to tell me a story right now?

"He asked me how business was going, and I was honest. I said that things weren't great and I needed to figure out something new or I'd have to give up the shop. As I fixed his bike, I explained to him about this idea I had for a bakery and a bike shop in one, and he liked it. He said he wanted to help."

"The mystery investor."

Kevin nodded, still not looking her in the eye. "The man said he would invest his money into the shop for a very small percentage of the revenue, but said he would only do this if I did him two favors."

She froze, her heart feeling like a shriveled rock thudding to the floorboard below.

"He told me he would give me the money if his daughter was the one to run the bakery…and if I could get her to leave her boyfriend."

She swore, placing a hand over her mouth.

"Jess…" Kevin begged, finally looking at her, finally reaching for her.

But she tore away from his grasp. She unbuckled her seat belt and flung open her door, then stormed down the street away from the house with the balloons.

The other car door slammed and the slapping of sandals followed behind her. "Sweetheart, please, wait—"

"How could you ," she fumed.

"I was desperate , Jess. And his offer was so good…and a part of me wanted to do it because I really, really wanted you to leave Charlie."

"So you partnered with my father," she spat. "He paid for the renovations, the new espresso machine, my tablet…"

"I told him the tablet might have been a bit much, but he wouldn't listen after I told him you were still using your high school laptop."

She stopped her march and spun around to face him, then glared. "You told him that ?! How much more does he know? Were you feeding him information this whole time?"

"No, after the tablet, I told him that I'd held up my end of the bargain, and if he wanted to know more about you, he would have to reach out himself. I promise, Jess."

"Your promises mean nothing." She forcefully kicked away a rock on the sidewalk.

"Sissy!!"

Her back went ramrod straight at the sound of Dakota's voice. She looked up at the house and saw her standing there in a flowing green maxi dress, her feet bare, soft waves of blonde hair tumbling down her back. Her face was bright with hope as she beheld Jess, waving her over to the porch.

"I can't believe you thought that this was the best moment to tell me the truth."

"He asked me to not tell you, not until you were ready to talk to him yourself. And then you asked me to come to the shower and I—"

"You thought you were off the hook," she finished for him. "How many more secrets, Kevin? Why are you always holding things back from me?"

"Because I'm afraid you'll push me away."

"You can't always be afraid of that."

"Oh yeah? Then explain to me what you're doing right now. "

She glared. "I'm taking a walk."

"And not running away from what's going on in front of you? Not trying to create as much distance as you can from me ?"

"You just told me you've been secretly in cahoots with MY FATHER ," she yelled at him. "What do you expect me to do, huh? Kiss you and say it's okay? That I still love you?"

His eyes widened. "You…love me?"

Jess felt her face go hot, her breathing jagged after those words slipped right out of her mouth.

He reached for her, his hands on her elbows.

"I—I can't do this," she croaked, wrenching away. She ran down the grassy slope next to the house and to the dock attached to the backyard. The wood creaked under her feet as she jogged, then she stopped at the edge and let out an ear-piercing scream. Tears finally fell down her cheeks. Tears for how much had changed and how much time she'd lost. Tears for having said those three words to Kevin when she wasn't even sure if she was ready to say them. Tears for a life that felt equal parts beautiful and terrifying and frustrating.

She sat on the dock and looked out at the river that led into Haverport's bay and out to the Atlantic. She wasn't sure how long she sat there, but at some point, she heard the boards creak as someone approached from behind. She sucked in a breath and whipped her head around, ready to unleash again.

But it wasn't the golden boy approaching her.

Jess's father held up his hands in mock surrender. He wore his usual "dressed up" getup for Dakota's shower—cargo shorts, his T-shirt swapped out with a polo, and a pair of boat shoes on his feet.

She exhaled as she continued to stare. There was so much she needed to say, and yet, she was unable to form a concrete sentence.

He slid his hands into the pockets of his shorts, then cocked his head toward the boat floating in the water next to them. "Shall we go for a ride?"

Her eyes flicked up to the house. Dakota was standing there with her mother, Jasper rubbing her shoulder. Nosy guests were also watching them, probably wondering who the crazed blonde girl was screaming bloody murder down by the dock.

Jess got to her feet. "Sure."

Everything about being on her father's boat felt exactly the same. He untied the ropes as she stepped in and opened up the dock box, pulling out her life vest that was still waiting for her. Like she never left. She clicked it on and took a seat as he revved the engine, then steered the boat down the river and out to the bay.

Jess kept her eyes on the water as they rode in silence for five minutes, ten minutes, fifteen. The sound of the waves and the rumble of the boat below her feet calmed her anxious heart. She unfurled her tightly wound hands in her lap and inhaled, the salty sea stinging her nose and watering her eyes.

When they finally reached a patch of relatively calm water, her father killed the ignition. He swung his chair toward her and gave her that crooked smile, the same one he used to give her those early mornings clamming on the beach or walking down Main Street before Haverfest or working the docks with him at Cap's. It somehow all felt familiar yet so foreign to her, and for the briefest moment, she wondered if it was all a dream she would wake up from.

He cleared his throat. "You look good, Jessie."

She crossed her arms. "I look exactly the same."

He shook his head. "Nah, you look settled. Happy."

"And apparently I have you to thank for that."

"I—" He grimaced. "He told you, I'm guessing."

"That wasn't fair of you to make him keep it a secret."

"You're right, it wasn't fair. But if he'd told you the truth, would you have said yes?"

She squeezed her hands into fists and looked away.

"There's so many things I've wanted to say over the years," he confessed. "So many ways I wish I could have fixed it."

"Why didn't you?" she muttered. "I—I thought—"

I thought you would come after me. She spent years hoping and dreaming they'd finally "come around," when everything would go back to the way things were. But he never did. They never tried. She never tried.

"You know that stubborn pride you have, the same one that makes you so determined and so good at running your bakery?"

She looked his way and arched a brow.

"You get it honest, my love. Every time I thought about coming after you, I felt hurt all over again. I let it consume me and take me away from what I should have been doing."

"And what should have you been doing?"

"Rescuing my little girl."

Jess shook her head. "I don't need rescuing."

He chuckled. "You're right, you don't need anyone to do anything for you. You've had that independent streak since you were little. But I knew deep in my gut that Charlie was not the man for you, and I should have done something about it."

"You did. You kicked me out."

She watched as her father blew out a breath and looked down at his boat shoes, pink coloring his cheeks.

"You also told me—"

"Don't. I know what I said. Those words haunt me every minute of every day."

She tucked her legs underneath her and made herself small, shielding herself from the pain she knew was inevitable, hoping it would hurt a little less this time.

"I didn't mean it, Jessie."

"Then why did you say it?"

"Because you were my pal and your words broke my heart. I wanted you to hurt like I was. I was foolish. I am your father and it is my job to protect you, and I failed miserably. I let you down. With Cap's, with how you felt about Charlie, with everything."

"You didn't let me down with Cap's," she exhaled. "I eventually put the pieces together and figured out that none of it was your fault. I know he ousted you."

He nodded, lifting the worn ball cap on his head to brush his hair back before fastening it back on. "My life's work, taken away, like that." He snapped his fingers.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"I know you are, love."

They waded in silence for a little while, the waves swaying the boat as the sun peeked out from the clouds in the sky.

"Dakota really misses you," he murmured. "Your mom really misses you."

"And I miss them."

"…I really miss you."

She refused to give him that sliver of hope. At least not yet. "Have you gone clamming?"

"Not since you left."

"That's incredibly stupid."

He chuckled. "I tried once, but I ended up crying the entire drive there, so I turned the car around and didn't try again."

"So many clams just sitting there."

"Then maybe we could go sometime."

She pursed her lips. "I'll think about it."

His lips curled into a smile. "Good."

Jess nodded.

"How's business going?"

"Figured you would already know that."

"Kevin refuses to tell me anything, says I need to fix my problems before I can see the books."

She huffed. "At least he got one thing right."

"I think that boy got a lot of things right."

Jess scowled.

Her father chuckled again. "Don't be mad at him. He was saving his business. And I think he also really wanted to save you. I barely had to ask before he screamed an enthusiastic yes."

"He probably did a dance when he said it."

"He did, actually."

She began to smile, then caught herself, schooling her face back into a frown.

"Business is steady, but we need more," she explained. "We're not making enough to support ourselves through the offseason. I might have to consider letting Zach go, which I really don't want to do. We might have to sell and hope the owner doesn't want to demolish the place."

"I could invest more."

"Excuse me? With what money?"

He shrugged. "Getting bought out of your own business does have its perks. I have a lump sum in the bank, enough to allow me to go into early retirement. Plus some."

She felt flustered at how willing he was to simply solve her problem. "No. That's way too much to ask of you."

"You didn't ask. I offered."

"And I'm refusing."

He smirked. "Still as stubborn as ever."

"Did you think I wouldn't be?"

"No. But I did hope that maybe you'd want to work with your old man."

She glowered at him. "You really think we can make the jump from not speaking to one another to being in business together after one conversation?"

"We're already in business together, Jessie."

"Against my will," she grumbled to herself.

"I know it's a lot to consider, and you're right, it's one conversation." He revved the engine. "But I would like to keep having more conversations."

She eyed him, his face full of hope. Hope for what they could be, for what they could return to. Jess nodded once in his direction. He returned one with a smile, then drove the boat back toward the dock in comfortable silence.

Jess tentatively followed her sister into the house she thought she would never step into again. Despite the throngs of people and the pastel shower decor, everything about her childhood home felt the same, and she was thankful for it. Thankful she could count on this place to be a constant when everything else in her life was changing by the minute.

Dakota snatched her hand and pulled her down on the leather couch next to a mountain of presents. She handed her a notepad with a smile and asked her to take notes as she opened gifts. Jess was thankful again that her sister still knew her so well, knew that she would want something to do with her hands and keep busy instead of shifting uncomfortably.

Thankful. It was a feeling she did not expect to experience today.

Jess took notes with a smile, watching her sister glow and laugh as she opened each onesie and pacifier and bib. She was joy and sunshine and goodness, a beacon of happiness in the living room. The same exact spot Jess'd had her last conversation with them on a dark, dreary, horrible night.

Dakota held up a breast pump with a grin. Jess shook her head at her sister's amusement over a breast pump , then scribbled it down.

Her sister placed it carefully back in the bag and handed it to their mom, who was looking at Jess like she was a ghost that would disappear if she glanced away.

Jess cleared her throat and leaned close to Dakota. "Any chance you know where Kevin went?"

Dakota's face fell a smidgen. "Calvin picked him up. I tried to get him to stay, but he told me he didn't want to be the cause of any more of your pain. Something about how this is your true home?"

She frowned deeply, his words from the other night in the storm ringing in her head. I want you to be my home, Jess.

She'd said those words right back, without hesitation, after he told her how he truly felt. Yet, when she told him how she felt, she let those three words tumble from her lips without being completely honest. Then she did what she does best. She pushed him away.

But this time he let her. He didn't fight it. He simply got in the car and left.

A soft hand squeezed her own. "I can hear you overthinking."

Jess gave her sister a tight smile. "Not much has changed there, huh?"

"No, maybe not." Dakota smiled. "But a lot has changed, and I think for the better."

Jess leaned her head against the couch as guests mingled, piling food on plates and pouring cups of sweet tea. "Like what?" she asked.

"Like you being here." Another squeeze. "Like you spending all summer being challenged by a man who only wants what's best for you."

"I hardly think going skinny dipping or shopping for clothes would be considered a challenge ."

"Things you probably wouldn't have done last summer," Dakota countered. "Everything on that list challenged you in some way, and I really like him for that."

"Why?" she whispered.

Dakota placed a hand on Jess's cheek. "Because it was good practice for facing this final challenge and coming home."

Why is bravery so messy?

It was the thought that ran through Jess's head throughout the rest of the shower, and the hours after as she helped clean up. Her father didn't say much to her after their talk on the boat, her mother also equally as quiet as they worked side by side wiping down surfaces, doing dishes, wrapping up leftover food, and tying up trash bags. When the house was finally cleaned she mumbled her goodbyes, leaning down to hug Dakota sitting on a porch chair, Jasper massaging her feet propped up on his knees. She didn't make a move to hug her parents, and neither did they. Timid smiles, cordial waves, and Jess was off, driving away from her home once again. But this time with the promise of coming back.

She pulled the car onto the main drag and slowed as she made her way down the road, past a crowded Wilson's Pub and Pop's Seafood and Penny's Pizzeria, a classic Saturday night in Haverport unfolding before her eyes. It was only a matter of weeks before the summer people packed up and left town, and it all felt like it was going by too quickly. They were running out of time, and she had no idea how to fix it or what to do.

Jess drove slowly past Grampy's, glancing into the dark window and noticing a faint glow coming from the back kitchen. Without thinking about it too much, she pulled over and parked, then walked to the back door and knocked three times.

The door creaked open and a hand shot out, holding a brown paper bag. "Five bucks. Cash only."

"Need a hand?"

He opened the door further, his gray beard twitching into a grin when he noticed it was Jess. "Got your apron?"

She reached into her purse and pulled out her denim old faithful. "Always."

He stepped back to make room for her. Jess fastened her apron and looked around the cramped kitchen. Cartons of blueberries and flour and brown sugar sat open next to square silver takeaway trays that lined the entire counter. She peered into the oven and saw it was already full with trays on trays of blueberry coffee cake.

Before she could say anything, Grampy thrust a piece of paper at her. She took it from him and scanned the top.

Grampy's Blueberry Coffee Cake

Her eyes widened as she continued to read the recipe in her hands.

"What…did you just…are you serious—" she sputtered.

"Chop, chop. I don't have all night," Grampy interrupted. He handed her a whisk.

She walked up to the counter and placed the prized recipe down, then, still completely shook, began to follow the most coveted recipe in Haverport. Beat the butter and sugar, add an egg and vanilla. Sift the flour, salt, baking powder and soda, then add it to the wet ingredients. As she got to the part where she was folding in sour cream ( sour cream , she thought, of course ), Grampy handed her a small bowl of freshly washed blueberries. Adding it in, she spread the cake batter into prepared pans and handed them off to Grampy to top with his signature sugary crumb and slide into the oven.

They kept at it for another hour, preparing one cake after another after another. Her hands were cramping from folding cake batter, but she was beaming as she took a seat on a nearby stool, watching Grampy pull the last few batches of cakes from the oven.

"So you do your baking the night before," Jess commented.

"The early mornings were becoming too much, especially for the demand," Grampy explained. "I can't have this many cakes ready by seven."

"Have you ever thought about opening later?"

"And disappoint the town? No, never."

Jess smiled, swinging her feet. "You let me see the recipe."

Grampy shrugged. "Yes, well, I figured it was time to let someone see it."

Her jaw dropped. "Are you telling me I'm the first ?"

He grinned. "Sure are, kid."

" Why?! "

Grampy crossed his arms. "For the same reason you knocked on my door and offered me a hand. You're dedicated. I see how hard you've been working to make your bakery into something in town, despite all the odds."

"It doesn't seem to be enough, though," she grumbled.

"Tell me more."

She did. She explained about the different changes she'd made, like adding focaccia to bring in afternoon customers and matcha to bring in a younger crowd and their date-day bike rental deal they finally implemented. She briefly told him about the numbers Calvin meticulously laid out for her and Kevin recently, and how much they would need to stay afloat the rest of the year.

"We failed," she concluded.

To her shock, Grampy rolled his eyes. "You did not fail. I don't want to hear that."

"Then what would you call it?"

"A learning curve."

"A learning curve that ended up curving right into failure."

He shook his head. "Not if your next move is a smart one."

She cocked a brow. "Got any ideas?"

His mouth twitched. "Potentially."

She frowned. "You're scaring me, Gramps."

"Ha! Gramps ." He shook his head then pulled out another stool and took a slow seat. "As you can see, I'm getting old."

"No, you're not. You're going to live forever."

Another laugh from him. Jess grinned.

"Here's a thought…What if I buy Port Wheels?"

Her eyes widened. "What? Why would you do that?"

"Because it would work well with my retirement plan."

"And that is?"

"To hand down this place to you."