Changing Plans

Chapter One

Lydia doubted that anyone had ever made not getting a job quite so complimentary.

"Your qualifications are, of course, excellent, and your recommendations are second to none," said the man in the gray suit.

"You're obviously a very capable young doctor," added the woman in the burgundy suit.

"We were all very impressed with your interpersonal skills," said the man in the blue suit.

Lydia crossed her legs and tried to smile because no matter how good all of this sounded, the fact remained that she just wasn't getting the job. Which was a shame because the neat little practice was exactly what she had in mind.

The town was pretty, the clientele were wealthy enough to be interesting, and she'd be a half hour drive to her sister's. All in all, just what the doctor ordered. Well, just what she ordered, but since she was actually, really, truly a doctor now, the aphorism still held.

"However, the unfortunate fact is," went on gray-suit.

"That you're just not right for us," said burgundy-suit.

"Unfortunately," agreed blue-suit.

Lydia nodded as though she completely understood.

Gray-suit smiled sympathetically. "This is a family-oriented practice, we're looking for someone more… family-oriented."

She had a sister, and both a niece and a nephew, but apparently those things didn't count. No. The tall, thin man that had eventually got the job had a wife. And she was pregnant. Lydia sighed internally.

"I completely understand," she said, even though she really didn't. "And I do hope you'll keep me in mind if there are any further openings."

Which there wouldn't be, because this was the kind of practice where you got in on the ground floor and stayed in, working your way up to investing and being a partner and then working three days a week so you could play golf on the other days. Not that Lydia played golf. Yet.

"We will," smiled burgundy-suit, glad to have got the uncomfortable task of informing the candidate that they just weren't married enough or attached enough to actually get the job. "We really will."

All of which left Lydia five minutes later walking down the sunny path toward her car wondering just where her carefully laid plans had all gone wrong.

"IT'S ILLEGAL," LEAH said, putting down a plate of biscuits on the coffee table and slapping two-year-old Finn's hand away from them. "Or at least it should be."

"I don't think it is," Lydia said, holding her warm coffee. "I mean, they're not allowed to ask me about my marital status, but I did sort of… well, it all came out during the mixer and probably I should have kept my mouth shut."

"Who cares whether you're married or not? Or whether you have a girlfriend? It's not like it makes you any worse of a doctor. What, does having someone to share a bed with mean that you're more likely to diagnose correctly or something? I mean, really…"

Lydia shrugged. "I mean, it's their prerogative. It's their practice. They can hire who they like, and I suppose I can understand them wanting to go for someone they know will fit in."

"Maybe it was because you're gay," Leah said thoughtfully, shifting her sleeping daughter slightly so that she could sit down. "Do you think Riley's got a temperature?"

Lydia reached over and touched her niece's cheek. "No, all kids get warmer when they sleep. And nice try, but the lead practice doctor was gay, so I don't think my sexuality had anything to do with it. More like the fact that I'm not getting any opportunities to practice said sexuality."

"Sex?" Finn asked, his cheeky face covered with biscuit crumbs.

Lydia pulled a face at Leah. "Sorry."

Her sister sighed. "He'll forget it in an hour. He's at that stage."

"Sex," Finn said more defiantly.

"The trick is to just ignore it."

"Right," Lydia said uncertainly. She turned back to the matter at hand. "It was the perfect place though."

"Maybe that's part of the problem," said Leah, grappling with her son and wiping his mouth with a tissue before pulling him up into her lap.

"What? That I want to work in a nice place?" asked Lydia.

"No, well, yes," Leah said. She sighed again. "You just… you've always had a plan, you know?"

Which was true. Lydia had wanted to be a doctor for as long as she could remember, since she'd been putting plasters on teddies and bandaging doll heads. She'd got her GCSEs, then the A Levels she needed, she'd gone to medical school, done her training, and everything had gone like clockwork, there'd never been a doubt in her mind.

Alright, it hadn't always been easy, but nothing worth having was easy, was it? She'd worked hard, but she'd got what she wanted. Or she had up until now.

No, the reason not getting the job had irked her so much was that the plan, her plan, said that by now she should have the job. By now she should already be developing patient relationships, already setting down roots in a community, already be preparing for the next stage.

Which was obviously family. She shot her sleeping niece and struggling nephew a look. Maybe not kids yet though.

"What's wrong with having a plan?" she asked.

"Nothing," said Leah. "Nothing at all, just…" She looked down at her children. "You know, none of this was planned."

"I'm well aware," Lydia said. She could well remember the day her little sister had come to her panicking because she thought she was pregnant. Seeing Leah so distraught had torn her up a little inside. It was her job to look after her, and she couldn't help feeling for a while that she'd failed. Except everything had turned out alright. More than alright.

"But that sort of makes it better," Leah was saying now. "I mean, the problem with a plan is that once you have it, there's only two options. You achieve it or you fail at it. So there's a fifty percent chance of being disappointed. As opposed to just going with the flow, where everything's a pleasant surprise when it works out."

"Mmm," said Lydia. There was some faulty logic there. "But then there's still a fifty-fifty chance, isn't there? I mean, it might be a pleasant surprise, or it might be a terrible one?"

"You know what I mean." Leah finally settled Finn down into her arms. "You just… You have this idea of how everything is supposed to go, which so far has worked out great for you. But what happens when everything doesn't go the way it's supposed to go?"

"Jesus, you're making it sound like I'm on my last legs or something," Lydia grumbled. "It's not like there's a shortage of jobs around. The world will always need doctors."

"Maybe that's the answer," said Leah, finally picking up her cup of coffee.

"What is?"

"The world. Maybe you should go get a job at one of those charities, like on telly. Go to Uganda or Zaire or something."

"Zaire doesn't exist anymore," Lydia said. "And I don't want to go to Uganda. I like being here. I don't want to go anywhere."

"I do hope you don't mean that literally."

Lydia laughed. "I don't. I won't be cluttering up your spare room for much longer, I swear. I'll get myself sorted out. This was just… a small setback, that's all. I'll get the next job."

"What about in the meantime?"

"In the meantime, I'm still on the locum register and will go wherever I'm sent," Lydia said. "And there's another position that I've already applied for."

"Of course you have. Because you've always got a plan."

"Listen, I'm going to be a fully-fledged GP by the time I'm thirty, that's what the plan says, and that's what I'm going to do." Lydia stretched out her legs and crossed them at the ankles.

"I'm sure you will," Leah said, sniffing.

"What's the sniff for? I said I'm going to do it, so I am."

"I'm not sniffing at you, fool," said Leah. She sniffed again, then pulled a face. "Finn needs a change." She lifted her son up onto her shoulder and stood. "Don't scoff all the biscuits before I'm back."

"As if," Lydia said, leaning forward to grab a chocolate digestive as her sister walked out of the room.

She had always had a plan, and there was nothing wrong with that. And things had always gone to plan. This latest rejection was nothing more than a tiny hiccup in proceedings.

But perhaps, just perhaps, she had overlooked certain things. Like a social life, for example. It wasn't hard to notice that most other people around her age were married or at least in relationships. Whilst she had… well, she'd been busy. She'd had a plan to stick to, after all.

Now she was actually qualified though, well, now she had a bit more time on her hands, maybe it was time to start thinking of things other than her career. She sucked air through her teeth, thinking. Or perhaps it would be better to get that first real job first, then she'd be more settled and able to look for someone.

Unless, of course, the lack of someone meant that she lost out on yet another job. Was that a risk she was willing to take?

She bit into her biscuit, chewing it carefully. Her mobile rang just as she swallowed, dancing across the coffee table as it vibrated. She made a grab for it.

"Yes, yes, hello?" she said, glancing over at Riley to make sure she was still sleeping. "Hello?"

"Yes, this is Barbara from Medical Staffing Ltd., am I speaking with Doctor Carlisle?"

The title still gave Lydia a shiver down her spine. "You are."

"Excellent, I have a locum position available, can I send through the details?"

Lydia sighed. She might as well. The money would be good and it would keep her skills honed while she went through the application process for yet another practice. "Yes, of course," she said. "You have my email."

By the time Leah came back with a sweeter-smelling Finn, Lydia was already reading the practice details. A small, one-doctor clinic in a place called… she skimmed back to the beginning of the email… a place called Whitebridge.