Chapter 45

T he rest of the evening is overwhelming as everything comes crashing back to me, and how I felt during these last few days that I wasn’t myself. I know it’s not my fault, but there’s still major guilt for how I treated everyone.

I talk to Ember and Iris, hugging them both close and apologizing profusely for how cold I was.

“Hey, stop it. You weren’t yourself. We don’t blame you, we’re just so happy you’re back,” Ember says, squeezing me tight.

“Seriously, Vi. You did nothing wrong. How are you holding up?” Iris asks.

I search my feelings and they’re all so complicated I don’t know where to start. There should be no conflicting thoughts about my grand-mère, yet, I still have an ache in my chest. Even though she hurt me, even though everything was a lie. It’s a harsh reality when someone you loved and trusted can hurt you so profoundly.

She deserves to be where she is. Her punishment may even be too light. It’s hard to combine the woman who taught me everything about magic, who showed me love and gave me my coven—with the woman who left me in an orphanage, left her daughter magicless, and only cared about witches.

Iris rubs my arm. “Hey, we don’t have to talk about it right now.”

“Thanks.” I look around and a slow smile spreads across my face as the wolves mill about, ready to take their full moon run.

Witches and wolves came together to bring me back, to give me my family and my mate back.

“Oh, just forget about me, huh?” Azure says with sass in the back of my mind, and I smile even wider.

I look around and just think about what I want to say to her instead of saying it out loud. “I could never forget about you. I missed you.”

“As you should. Let a girl run free, would ya?”

“Just give me a minute”, I tell her as I approach my mother. She seems tense, and nervous. I don’t speak, instead I wrap my arms around her, trying not to cry. But as she holds me back and I’m reminded of all the time I’ve missed with her and my father, some of the guilt goes away. Grand-mère’s love was conditional, but the people around me, they would have loved me either way. That broken shell of a woman I was before the ritual, and the true me.

My mother pets down my hair and kisses the side of my face.

“I’m so sorry, Violet,” she says.

“It’s not your fault.”

“I just wish I could have protected you when it mattered all those years ago.”

I pull back and gaze into the bright blue eyes that mirror mine. “You did everything you could. You brought me back now, you were there when it mattered.”

My mother smiles, looking over my shoulder.

“Let’s have brunch tomorrow. But go ahead,” she says.

I furrow my brow. “Go ahead and what?”

She cups my face. “Go be with your pack. I know your father is ready to run with the wolves again. Let her free,” she says.

The warm feeling of acceptance fills me. Something I wasn’t sure was possible. I look around the coven, and they all give me nods of approval. I was so scared that they wouldn’t love me or accept me once they found out what I was. But here they all are, supporting me in the way only a true family does.

“Thank you,” I say, and she kisses my cheek one last time as I search around for Silas.

It doesn’t take long. He gave me some space so I could thank and greet everyone who came here tonight, but I can feel his gaze on the side of my face. I walk over to the outcrop of trees.

The wolves are nearby, my father included, I assume.

Silas stands up straight from the tree he was leaning against as I approach. He’s cautious with me, and I don’t blame him. I can’t imagine what it was like on his end watching me slip away, or the transition during the ritual.

“Are you tired, do you want to go home?” he asks.

I smirk, tossing his flannel jacket, grabbing my shirt at the hem and tossing it on the ground. He looks at me with wide eyes.

“Well, are we going to go on our first run as a pack together or what?” I ask.

Azure is nearly prancing around in my head, ready to be let out, ready to see her mate.

The smile that takes over Silas’ face is devastating, and I fist his shirt and bring him closer to me.

“What do you say, dear husband?” I ask.

His grin is still wildly in place as he kisses me and brings me behind a tree. I guess modesty is still a thing kept between mates as he helps me undress and he does the same to himself. The cool air of the night tickles my skin as I appreciate the naked man in front of me.

He takes a step in front of me and cups my face with both hands and looks at me like I’m his world. I could have lost the love of my life. She made me forget him. More of the guilt washes away as he kisses my forehead and holds me close.

“Stick with me, okay?” he says.

I can feel Azure roll her eyes. “Yeah, I’m just going to wander off from my mate. Idiot,” Azure says.

I smile and kiss the center of Silas’ chest. It’s then I see his neck, my thumb dragging along the scar that matches my own and my lips part in shock.

“We’re not mated anymore?”

Silas just smiles. “It seems the universe didn’t think we were rare enough. Looks like I have the pleasure of marking you all over again.”

“He’s smooth. I’ll give the man that,” Azure says.

“Azure is getting antsy,” I tell him.

“Thorin has been screaming at me since the moment you recognized me,” he says. “Should we give them what they want?”

“I think they deserve it,” I say as Silas backs up, his big beautiful wolf taking his space.

He takes a few steps toward me, nuzzling my collarbone as I pet his fur.

“I missed you too, Thorin, are you ready to see your girl?”

He makes a chuffing noise and backs up as I willingly shift for the first time. The pain isn’t as rough as before, and Azure lets me stay in the background as she and Thorin are reunited.

Both of their heads nuzzle on another as they see each other for only the third time. Thorin is delicate with her, even though he’s so much larger.

It’s then I hear Thorin’s deep, demanding voice for the first time.

“My mate, how I’ve missed you,” he tells Azure, who preens at the attention.

They play, yipping at each other’s legs as we meet up with the rest of the pack. What I can see is limited, but I know the large black wolf with deep brown eyes is my father. He bows his head slightly at Thorin.

The other wolves, all different colors and sizes, glance our way, and there’s no conflicting feelings. They recognize Thorin as their Alpha and me as his mate. It’s freeing in a way, being a visitor to this experience. It doesn’t last long as Azure kicks me out to frolic with her mate, but I feel whole.

Pieces of me may have gotten dinged off over the years. But slowly, with Silas back in my life, finding my parents, and making the coven what it should have always been, I have more than hope in my heart. I have everything.