16. Mae

16

MAE

" F uck them," Denise remarked rather emphatically. "You need to go out on the town, let your hair down, and find some random, nameless schmuck to fuck you. That'll get it all out of your system."

"You were the one who told me to fuck Jian," I pointed out, smiling as I held up the only sexy dress I'd brought with me. It was light green with a cinched waist and a sexy slit up one leg that would let anyone glimpse too much of me from the right angle.

"How was I supposed to know he was connected to the man you want to avoid?" Denise scoffed and vanished from the Facetime call for a few seconds. She then returned with a glass of wine in hand. "Look, all I'm saying is that you spent this long telling me all the reasons you need to stay away from Rocco, including a few that you're not telling me, and that's fine. If you need a distraction, then find someone boring and normal whose name you won't remember in the morning."

"I don't know if I'd find anyone like that out here."

"That's why you should wear that sexy little black dress. "

"I didn't bring it." Lowering my arms, I turned away from the mirror and shot her a sad smile. "I didn't think I'd be coming here looking to get laid."

"Rookie mistake," Denise replied. Her deep red lipstick left a half-crescent moon on her glass and she pursed her lips together. "I mean, you look fantastic in the green. It just looks a little more summer date night than late-night fuck."

"I'm nervous. Is that weird?" I'd booked myself a night alone at a restaurant, set on wining and dining myself—alone—for the first time since Zack had been born. The night was being encouraged by my mother who, in her words, was tired of me moping around the house and wanted me to go out and have some fun.

The way she'd spoken, you'd think there were a bunch of nightclubs littered around town that I could go to.

"I don't think it's weird," Denise replied. "When was the last time you spent some time with yourself?"

I sighed and set the dress on the bed, then dragged both hands through my long hair and scooped it on top of my head. "Uhm… too long to think about," I said, turning back to the mirror. "I don't know if I'm more nervous to get attention from someone or more nervous to not get attention. Does that make any sense?"

"Perfect sense." Denise leaned closer to the camera. "Speaking from experience, the perfect man for you will find his way into your life when you least expect it. And what better way to tempt fate than to go to dinner, treat yourself to a good night as a gorgeous, single woman, and see what fate drops into your lap?"

"You're only saying that because you're engaged."

"And?" Denise chuckled. "It's the truth. Who knew my sexy man would fall into my lap because of a gas leak? He saw me at four a.m. with my hair a mess, shoes on the wrong feet, and my underwear on backward. Somehow, he decided I was the girl for him. "

"Ahh, so you're saying I need to nearly have my apartment go up in flames and see what sexy firefighter rolls by?" Turning my head back and forth, I settle on pinning my updo in place with some bobby pins. Then I pulled a few curls free to frame my face and tucked one behind my ear.

"It's not a requirement." Denise laughed. "But it helps."

"Alright." I sighed and straightened up. "You've seen the dress. This is the hair. What shoes do I wear?"

"What do you have?"

"Black pumps and gold sandals."

"You know, if you go for a darker lip and line your eyes, those black pumps would look sexy as hell."

I glanced at her and sighed. "I'm terrible at lining my eyes."

"Just do it like I showed you," Denise coaxed around another mouthful of wine. "Follow your eye shape, flick at the end near your brow, then smudge with a damp finger. Easy."

"For you." Picking up my phone, I moved it to my dresser and sat down.

"All it takes is practice, and don't be so hard on yourself. You've been raising a kid. Hardly been time to keep on top of makeup trends."

"Too true," I murmured, rummaging through my sparse makeup bag for anything that matched Denise's idea.

"What are Zack's plans for the night, anyway?"

"My mom is taking him to the movies, and then they're coming back here to make s'mores and stay up late," I replied, finally locating a dark red lipstick at the bottom of the bag. "Acting like it's some kind of sleepover. "

"Cute." Denise chuckled. "Meanwhile, you're going to find the biggest dick in town and ride it until sunrise."

"Denise!"

She collapsed backward, cackling as warmth flooded my cheeks. I watched the crimson shade sweep across my pale cheeks and down my narrow throat. As crude as she put it, she was right.

I needed to stay away from Rocco and all temptation involved in him and his life. To do that, I definitely needed to get laid.

"Alright." I chuckled, holding up my sparse dollar store makeup pallet. "What shade is good for my eyes?"

Denise's advice had me feeling like a million dollars when I stepped into the restaurant a few hours later, clutching my purse to my abdomen and praying the outline of my Spanx couldn't be seen through my dress.

"Table for one, please." I smiled brightly at the hostess, who slowly looked me up and down. My heart jumped into my throat, expecting to see a catty thought pass through her eyes, but instead, she looked impressed.

"Do you have a reservation?" she asked, turning her attention to the ledger in front of her.

"Yes, it should be under Murphy?"

"There you are. Right this way, please." She picked up a menu and swept her arm to the side, indicating that I should follow.

I made it maybe ten steps toward my table before I spotted him. Rocco Adami sat two tables away from the one the hostess had brought me to. His attention was fixed on me like a lock, and the moment our eyes met, a pulse of heat prickled all over my body from head to toe.

What the fuck ?

The whole reason I was here was to avoid him, and instead he's right there, two tables away.

Rocco sat angled to the left at his table, one long leg crossed over the other and a glass of something honey-colored in his hands. His black shirt was missing the top two buttons, displaying deep golden skin just underneath. Beside him stood Dino, who was leaning over Rocco's shoulder, apparently oblivious to my presence while reading something aloud from the tablet in his hand.

And then there was Jian. He stood a few feet away by the wall with his hand clasped over his wrist. He was dressed in all black with a crisp, white shirt looking every bit the bodyguard he claimed to be. Jian had definitely noticed me. His eyes kept snapping in my direction, and the very tips of his ears that poked out of his blond hair were pink.

"Miss?" The hostess had been holding my chair out for what felt like hours, but the longer I stared at Rocco, the angrier I became. How dare he have Dino follow me around like some kind of puppy dog, or send Jian to me like some planned encounter? Was he trying to keep tabs on me?

Why couldn't he just leave me alone?

I dismissed the hostess with a wave and approached Rocco's table.

"Have you no shame?" I snapped the moment I was within earshot. Dino's head snapped upward at the sound of my voice, then his mouth parted into a small O while his gaze wandered slowly down my body. I lifted my chin and preened slightly, satisfied that he could see just how good I looked while knowing he would never touch me.

"Excuse me?" Rocco lifted his glass and took a sip, then he very slowly dragged his tongue over his full lower lip .

"You think I don't know everything by now? Sending Jian to run into me so, what, you could keep more tabs on me by pretending he was just some normal guy?" I snapped. Out of the corner of my eye, Jian's stance shifted slightly, but he didn't speak.

"You think pretty highly of yourself," Rocco replied, and his eyes narrowed a fraction. "As much as I'd love to play into that kind of self-obsessed fantasy, your meeting with Jian was pure chance."

"Oh, really?" Heat prickled down my spine as a swift curl of uncertainty rushed through my gut.

"Yes. Really. He didn't know who you were until we told him later. That really was all an accident." Rocco's head tilted to a forty-five-degree angle. "Would you have liked it if I'd put that much effort into it?"

"It would have been the most effort you ever put into anything," I snapped, trying to ignore the warmth sweeping across my cheeks. I clutched my purse a little tighter. "Then again, it makes sense. I can't ever imagine your committing that much to something."

"Are you sure about that?" His hazel eyes flashed at me over the edge of his glass while he drank.

"Yes." I straightened my shoulders. "Anyway, I'm here to remind you to leave me alone. All of you. I'm here to eat dinner, and I don't need you thinking it's an invitation."

"That depends," Rocco said. He lowered his glass and his fingertips danced across the edge. "Who are you eating dinner with?"

"What does it matter to you?" I snapped, not wanting to admit I was here alone.

"That's private."

"Who I eat dinner with is a private matter for you ?" I scoffed sharply. "Don't be so stupid. "

"You know, I'll find out the moment he gets here."

"Maybe it's a woman."

"Hot."

"You're gross," I snapped. The longer he watched me with that unblinking gaze, the more trapped and exposed I felt. Like he could see right through my dress—right through my Spanx holding everything in place. I didn't like how out of control that made me feel.

"If you entertain women in your bed now, I'm happy to give you some advice," Rocco continued, and his stupid, handsome face melted into a sexy smirk. "You remember how good I am."

"Actually, no," I remarked sharply. "I don't. You were barely a whisper in my exploits."

"Of which there have been many, I'm sure."

"So many. I mean, even since coming back here, I've snogged Dino and Jian and not given a thought to you. Jealous?"

Dino's knuckles bled white around the tablet he was holding. He didn't look away, either, acting like another line of rope keeping me in place.

"That you kissed my friends?" Rocco glanced up at Dino, then back at Jian. When he turned back to me, his smile was easy. "I don't care. I trust them with my life, and no better men exist than them."

Honestly, not the reaction I was expecting. I wanted him to be annoyed, to take some power back and wipe that smug look off his face. I hated that he acted like he knew me.

"Anyone else, however," Rocco continued, "then, maybe I'd have a problem."

"Even Zack's father?" I shot out before I could stop myself. As if Rocco and Zack's father weren't one and the same.

Rocco's entire demeanor shifted.