Chapter 31

Chapter Thirty-One

Zach

I knew the second I heard the knock on my motel room door who I'd find on the other side.

Sure enough, Cord stood across the threshold from me as soon as I pulled it open. "Son," he greeted before shoving his way inside the room I'd been holed up in for the past three days. After the confrontation on the sidewalk with Doreen Caswell, I'd taken off with no destination in sight. I drove until I couldn't any longer, pulling off at the first roadside motel I came across.

I turned my phone off and hadn't left these four walls for the past three days as I tried to loosen the vise grip that panic had on my heart. I handled everything poorly, I knew that, but I hadn't known what else to do. Going home hadn't been an option, neither was staying anywhere in Hope Valley, not while the Caswells were there. If I'd stayed, the panic attacks would have crippled me. I needed time. Even if my father hadn't shown up when he did, I would have climbed back in my truck and gone home today. I couldn't cut the world out forever, after all. I had a lot of explaining to do, and even more apologizing. I'd shirked my responsibilities, pawning everything off on Hal and the other hands. I'd probably worried my family sick. And I knew I hurt Rae when I shut her out.

There was so much I needed to fix. I hoped I hadn't screwed up so epically that it wasn't possible.

Cord moved to the small desk that was bolted into the wall and sat in the chair as I moved to the foot of the bed and sat down across from him. "How'd you find me?"

He lifted a single brow. "You forget what I used to do?"

A humorless chuckle rattled up my throat. I hadn't forgotten. Before I came along, my dad had been a Navy Seal. He retired from service before I knew him and had taken a job at a private security and investigation firm called Alpha Omega. That place had its own lore in our town. No one really knew exactly what they did there. All we knew for certain was that the place was run by and employed serious badasses. They were all ex-special forces from different branches of the military. Some of the men who had worked there with my father were retired like him, but they'd been replaced with other badasses, and the man who built it all, Lincoln Sheppard, was still running the show.

"If your plan was to come here and drag me home, you should know, I was already plannin' on leaving today."

He shrugged like he already knew that. "Figured you'd have gotten yourself back to rights by now, but I made a promise to your girl I'd bring you home, and I keep my promises."

My throat tightened at the mention of Rae, my heart rate spiking. God, I missed her. I could only hope she didn't hate me.

I swallowed past the lump in my throat, staring down at my feet as I asked, "You talked to Rae?"

He nodded. "This morning."

I heaved out a sigh and asked the question I had been dreading the answer to. "How mad is she? On a scale from I've lost her to I still have a chance ?"

"She wasn't mad. At least from what I could see. She was concerned. And sad."

"Fuck," I hissed, dropping my head and rubbing a hand over the back of my neck. "I really screwed up."

"Not gonna lie to you, bud. You did. I get what you're goin' through, but a man can't take off every time something gets hard. You have to stand your ground and handle it. And if you're not equipped to handle it in the moment, you need to lean on those around you to lighten the burden. But you can't keep running. Especially when you have your family to think about and a good woman waiting for you."

"I know. I'm sorry. I know I can't keep handling this issue the way I have been. I—" My mouth went dry. "I called Dr. Henson yesterday," I confessed. "I have an appointment with her later this week."

Dr. Henson had been my therapist since I was a teenager. She'd helped guide me through all the upheaval in my life from leaving an abusive home to adjusting to my new normal with Rory and Cord. She really helped me back then, and I trusted her to help me with this. I shouldn't have waited so long.

"I'm proud of you, son. That's a big first step. I'm glad you made it."

I exhaled loudly. "Yeah, well, I'm gonna have to get my shit together. I can't put my whole life on pause every time I run into those people."

"I agree that you need help finding a better way to cope, but I don't think those people are gonna be a problem for you anymore."

My head came up, my brow furrowed. "What? Why? "

"Your girl took care of it."

I shot to my feet as my heart rattled against my ribcage. "What? How? What did she do? Is she okay?"

"Calm down, Zach." He held his hands out in a placating gesture. "Relax and have a seat. She's fine. I was there to make sure of it."

That didn't make me feel any better. "You were where ?"

His expression remained calm as he answered, "At the Caswells."

"Goddamn it!" I began to pace the room, raking my fingers through my hair. "I didn't want her anywhere near those people, Dad. They're toxic. Poison. She's not safe around them."

He stood, stopping me mid-pace with his hands on my shoulders. "She was perfectly safe. But she was also determined. Even if I'd tried to talk her out of what she had planned, it wouldn't have done any good. She saw you get hurt and did what she could to protect you. That's what you do for the people you love, and that girl loves you, son. I knew it when I saw you together at your party and what she did today only solidified that knowledge. You're it for her."

"What—what did she do?"

"She got her lawyers to draw up a contract that she'd pay them fifty K if they agreed to move out of Virginia and never come back. I stood there and watched as she ripped that fucker Caswell a new asshole so beautifully I wanted to applaud her. She might have walked away fifty grand poorer, but she got him to sign, and I hung around long enough to watch them throw all their possessions in the back of a rundown station wagon and take off."

I had to have heard him wrong. I blamed the blood that was rushing in my ears. He couldn't have said what I thought he said.

"She—she really did that?"

He nodded solemnly. "You hurt her when you ran away. There's no doubt about that. She had every right to be mad. Hell, she had the right to be done with you completely, but she did that. Because she couldn't stand to see you in pain and she wanted to make sure it could never touch you again. A man is lucky if a woman like that comes around once in his lifetime, Zach. Some men never get that. You lucked out." He let go of my shoulders and took a step back. "Now get your ass out of this miserable room and go make things right, yeah?"

"Okay, Dad. And... I know I don't say it all the time, but I know how lucky I am that you and Mom found me."

"We found each other, Zach. Because we were meant to be a family. Now get out of here. "

I made it back to the ranch in record time, thanks to breaking almost every law of the road, but I would have gladly paid the cost of any ticket if it meant getting back to her. My truck skidded to a stop outside the barn, spitting up gravel and dust. I barely got the gear shift into park before I launched myself out of the cab and started toward the open doors.

"You're back," Connor said as I blew past him on the way to Rae's office. I wasn't even sure if she'd be in there, but I wouldn't stop until I found her.

"I'm back," I replied, turning to walk backward as I addressed him without breaking stride.

He grinned like he knew exactly who I was on the hunt for. "You get your shit sorted?"

I jerked my chin up in the affirmative. "It's all taken care of."

"Good. Then go get your girl. Last I heard, she was rippin' someone a new asshole over the phone. Think it was a feed supplier. I'll catch up with you later." He turned and disappeared out of the barn, and I whipped back around, jogging the rest of the way to my girl. Sure enough, she was sitting behind her desk, her elbows braced on the top and her head cradled in her hands. Her fingers slowly massaged circles over her temples like she was trying to relieve a headache, and I had no doubt I was the cause of it .

"I've been in love with you from the moment I saw you blow out of that cabin with a frying pan held over your head as a weapon." The words poured out of their own accord. I hadn't planned what I was going to say other than begging for forgiveness, but the moment I saw her, I knew she needed to know the truth.

Her head shot up, her eyes going wide. "You're back," she whispered in shock.

"I'm back." I moved deeper into the office, needing to be closer to her. "And I swear to Christ, I'll never leave you again."

Her eyes welled up, the shimmer of tears ripping into my gut like a rusty hunting knife. "Oh, baby. Don't cry. Please. It'll kill me." I pulled her up from the chair and into me, wrapping my arms around her and holding her close to my heart, right where she was meant to be. I'm so sorry. I fucked up. I should have come in like you asked. I should have talked to you, but you have my word, I'll never make that mistake again."

She sniffled, and I felt her lift her hands and brush the tears from her face. She wriggled out of my hold and took a step back, her back rigid and her shoulders square. That fierceness was in her eyes, that fire I loved so goddamn much, and seeing it filled every single empty space in my heart that had been left after Rory, Cord, Len, and my grandparents filled the spaces meant for them. Thanks to her, I was finally whole.

"I'm mad at you," she said. "You shouldn't have taken off like that. And you shouldn't have gone radio silent. You pissed me off. But... lucky for you, I love you, so I'm willing to forgive you this time." Her finger came up and jabbed at my face. "But so help me, if you do it again?—"

I grabbed her wrist and jerked her forward so she'd crash into me and took her mouth in a hungry kiss. "I won't." It was a vow. One of many I planned to make to this woman over the course of the rest of our lives. "I know what you did."

She lifted her chin haughtily. "I won't apologize. It was just money, and I have plenty of it. I'd do it again if it meant they'd go away. I would give them every single dime I have, and there is nothing you can say to change my mind," she issued with a sniff. "You helped me find myself, helped me discover what I'm capable of, so when I saw a chance to return the favor, I took it, and I don't feel even a little bad about it."

I smiled, reaching up to brush her hair back from her cheek and take her chin in my fingers. "I'd never expect you to apologize for doing what you did. When you love someone, you protect them. Thank you for protecting me, for loving me. But so you know, I plan to spend the rest of my life protecting you right back, because you're it for me, Rae. I want to build a life with you, right here. On our ranch."

She pulled in a shaky breath. "I'd love that," she whispered. "Zach, nowhere ever felt like home to me until I came here. Until I met you. You're all I want, and I want you forever."

"Good, baby." I leaned in, my lips brushing against hers as I said, "Because forever starts right now."