Chapter 119

Somehow, Anna had made her way to her bed the night before, because she woke up in it. She hadn’t even changed into her pajamas, and her dress was a wrinkled mess. The horrible memories about Kurt and how he’d acted flooded back into her memory as she opened her eyes, and she lay on her bed staring at up at the ceiling.

She dragged herself into the bathroom and let the hot water flow down through her hair and over her body, somehow hoping the steaming water would wash away the pain. But no matter how hot she made the water, the scalding liquid against her skin couldn’t distract from the pain in her heart. Eventually the heat made her dizzy, and she sighed and turned off the water.

She slowly dressed in her practice clothes and pulled her hair into a bun so she could go to class. Opening up the velvet box, she stared at her latest engagement ring, a hollow feeling in her heart.

With a sigh, she slid it onto her finger. It was a very beautiful diamond, a few karats at least, and it sparkled in the sunlight that streamed through her windows. Two smaller round diamonds flanked the main round diamond, and even more round diamonds were channel-set around the band. It was heavy. If Kurt had given it to her in love, she would have adored it. But he’d given it to her out of duty and obligation. And she was obliged to accept it. The truth turned the beautiful jewels into a gaudy, taunting reminder of her lost freedoms.

She closed her eyes, sucking in a long deep breath, reminding herself she needed to pretend to be happy and in love. Easier said than done. Quiet contentment would have to do.

She walked out to the kitchen to eat breakfast. Aaron appeared as she was finishing. “Holy shit!” He stared at her hand. “Kurt?”

Anna nodded and put her bowl in the dishwasher.

Aaron took her hand. “That is mighty impressive.”

“Yeah.” She pulled her hand away and went to sit on the couch, closing her eyes and dreading similar reactions at the studio when she arrived. It was tempting to hide the ring away, but surely, somehow, Kurt or Wilhelm would find out and she would probably get into trouble. She belonged to them, after all. Not herself.

“What’s wrong?” He frowned. “And what are you doing here? I thought you’d be with Kurt.”

“I think he had other plans.”

“Other plans...” Aaron shook his head and then his eyes suddenly widened as realization dawned. “He went and fucked someone else?”

Anna shrugged. “I think so. I mean, he implied it. He said I could watch if I wanted to.”

He scrunched his face. “What the hell is wrong with him?”

She shrugged again. “It doesn’t matter.” She hugged her legs to her chest and rested her cheek on her knees. “I’ll play the part and he’ll leave soon. Hopefully.”

Aaron frowned but didn’t say anything else.

As she’d suspected, her ring did not go unnoticed at the studio, and many admirers surrounded her, both for the ring and for Kurt. She forced a smile and answered questions, but was more than thankful when class finally began. Hugo had smiled kindly at her when he walked in, but went to stand on the other side of the studio.

Anna concentrated as best as she could during warm-ups, but couldn’t help but study the faces of her fellow dancers, wondering which one Kurt had taken back to his hotel room last night. Then she realized she didn’t really want to know and did her best to push aside the horrid thoughts.

Rehearsals went long and she was late getting home, but managed to be ready when Kurt knocked on the door. She gave a polite smile and said hello before walking away to retrieve her purse.

Kurt took her to a nice restaurant in Times Square. She was polite and attentive. He told her how Sofie and Derek were doing, and what spring was like in Frankfurt. When he asked how dancing was going and how she liked New York, she gave as short an answer as possible. Politely, of course.

As dessert was served, a thought occurred to her. She waited for the server to leave and then looked at Kurt. “Are you not sleeping with me because of the whole Elder-Son’s-wife-has-to-be-a-virgin thing?”

He grimaced and stared at the chocolate mousse in front of him for a long moment. Then he looked up and gave a sharp nod. “We are not supposed to sleep together until we are married.”

Anna frowned. “You really expect me to wait over a year to have sex?”

Kurt shrugged and took a sip of his wine. “I do not care what you do as long as you keep it private.”

Anna stared at him for a long moment. He looked back at her, an impassive expression on his face. Her jaw trembled and she dropped her gaze to her hands clasped in her lap. For a moment, she had hope that maybe he’d been keeping her at a distance because he didn’t want to be tempted. But it was obvious he just didn’t want her at all. She winced as the knife in her heart twisted and they ate their desserts in silence.

“When are you leaving?” she asked as they rode back to her apartment.

Kurt stared out the window. “Tonight. I was going to stay and watch you dance again, but...” He shrugged. “I do not think it is necessary.”

“Okay.”

The remaining few minutes in the car were even more uncomfortable than dinner.

As she stepped out of the town car, heat rose in her chest and she turned back to glare at him. “Can you please inform me in advance when you’re coming into town so I can be prepared?”

Kurt nodded. His brows twitched and his jaw clenched. “I do not know when it will be, but yes, I will call you.”

Anna nodded and turned to walk into the building, Kurt following behind. She wheeled around and frowned at him. “You don’t need to walk me to my apartment. I know the way.” He froze and she turned away again. She paused for a moment, her heart aching for the loss of the relationship they’d had previously. But Kurt wasn’t the man she thought, and?—

Kurt grabbed her hand and pulled her into his arms. He looked at her for a minute and then pressed his lips to hers in a passionate kiss. She pushed against his chest, trying to escape, but he was too strong. He held her against his chest, and she could feel his heart pounding against her hands. One arm held her around her waist and the other tangled in her hair, trying to deepen the kiss, but she kept struggling, tears in her eyes now. What was going on?

He loosened his hold and held her head to make her look him in the eye. “I am so sorry, Engel ,” he whispered. He kissed her one last time and then released her.

With a trembling hand, she touched her swollen lips and stared at him. “I don’t understand...”

He opened his mouth, but closed it and pressed his lips together. He shook his head and turned away, but not before she saw the pained look in his eyes as he slid into the back seat. The driver shut the door, then hurried around the car and drove away.

She couldn’t move. What had just happened? The way he’d looked at her... it was the old Kurt. The one she’d fallen in love with. But why had he been so cold? And why was he leaving her again? Why did he apologize?

She turned and ran into the building, desperate to escape the screaming questions in her head.

When Aaron came home later, she was in bed, still crying. He lay next to her and pulled her close. “What happened?” He gently slid her damp hair away from her face.

Anna told him how Kurt had acted and what he’d said at dinner, and how he’d kissed her before he left.

Aaron frowned. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

“I don’t know what’s going on. I’m so confused. It was the old him who kissed me, but then he... left.”

“I’m sorry, hon. I wish I could help, but I’m as confused as you are.”

There was a knock on the apartment door. “Expecting someone?”

He nodded. “Cameron.”

“Oh.”

“Let me go and let him in.” He stood. “Be right back.”

She heard muffled voices and a few minutes later, Aaron returned. “You want to come watch a movie with us?”

Anna shook her head. “No. I’m okay. I didn’t sleep well last night. I think I’ll just go to bed.”

He leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Come get me if you need anything.”

“You did what?” Alex glared at his brother. “How could you do that to her?”

Kurt balled his fists. “I told you I didn’t want to do it. You put me in the middle. Between you two again.” He growled. “It’s not fair.”

“Kurt—?” Vati reached out his hand, but Kurt jumped back.

“No, Vati. I can’t do this. I can’t pretend—?” He turned away and walked to the fireplace of the sitting room, leaned against the mantle, and hung his head. “I can’t go to her—spend time with her, knowing I have to give her up again.”

“So you threw the engagement ring in her face and fucked someone else?” Alex shoved Kurt away from the mantle. “You’re a fucking bastard.”

“Alex! Kurt! Stop!”

With a fierce glare, Kurt pulled his arm backward before striking Alex’s cheek with a forceful punch. Alex’s jaw dropped as he stared at his brother, but it only took a moment before he retaliated with his own swing. Kurt leaned back, evading Alex’s punch by mere inches. With a menacing growl, Alex pounced on Kurt, knocking him to the floor.

“Alex! Kurt!”

Alex straddled Kurt’s chest and punched him in the nose. Kurt’s curses filled the air as the two men grappled on the floor, exchanging blows. But their fight came to an abrupt halt when Vati’s voice reverberated through the entire house. “Boys!”

Alex was on top, his chest heaving, his nose bleeding, and his cheek throbbing. Kurt’s eye was rapidly turning black and blood ran down his cheek.

Vati shoved Alex off his brother and glared down at both of them, hands on his hips, face red, eyes full of fury. “Are you quite finished?”

Alex clenched his jaw and glanced at his brother. Kurt had gotten strong in his absence. Or Alex had gotten weaker. He narrowed his eyes at Kurt, but looked back at Vati and nodded.

“Yes, Vati,” the brothers muttered in unison.

“What h—oh, boys!” Mutti appeared next to Vati and Alex’s shoulders slumped. It was bad enough for Vati to have to pull him off Kurt, but the disappointment in his mother’s eyes stung his heart. She was right. They were acting like boys. Men in their thirties acting like children.

Alex sighed and looked at Kurt. “I’m sorry.”

Kurt glared at him, winced as he stood, and stormed away.

Alex ran his hands through his hair and stared at the floor for a moment before climbing to his feet. He shifted on his feet as Vati frowned at him.

“You two need to work things out.” He turned on his heel and stalked away.

Mutti sighed and shook her head. “Really, Alex. I expected more compassion from you.” She followed Vati away into the shadows and into their bedroom.

Alex winced as the bedroom doors clicked closed. Her soft words stung more than Vati’s anger. He sat down hard on the couch and stared into the flickering fire, ashamed. Yes, he and Kurt had fought many times when they were younger, but it really was pathetic for grown men to be fighting. He’d talk to Kurt in the morning and make things right. Once everyone had calmed down.