Chapter 36

Under any othercircumstances I would've done this differently. Chosen the ring myself and planned a proposal that would be fitting for Ameline. Probably a destination place. A beach with torches and flowers everywhere or Paris. This feels so inadequate, but I don't want to just sign a paper. She should at least have a ring with a promise.

The promise that I'll always love her. That no matter what we'll be together forever.

It feels strange that I haven't shared any of this with at least my parents, but I have the nagging feeling that they wouldn't approve. They never do when Jude does impulsive things and honestly, I don't want them on my case when I have to deal with so much.

While we're having lunch, I call the family jeweler so he can bring the solitaire rings he has available in Ameline's size. He sets them up in the dining room, and I call Ameline who first narrows her gaze at the velvet cloth on top of the table and then glances at me with a questioning look on her face.

"What's going on?" she asks, glancing between the sparkling rings and me.

"I wanted you to choose your ring," I state casually. I think that sounds better than we don't have time for me to get this right.

"Oh," she says, staring at the overwhelming number of rings set in front of her.

It makes me feel like an idiot that I don't have just the single perfect ring ready for her. Maybe after she's in remission I can design one with the help of Aunt Thea, who's amazing at designing jewelry.

Of course that goes at the bottom of the list of things I have to do. There are a lot of priorities. We have to be at the fertility clinic tomorrow. There are a lot of tests they have to run before they retrieve the eggs and fertilize the embryos. Though they're aware that in a way we're running out of time. The neurologist appointment is the day after tomorrow. I still don't know what we're going to do during the holidays. It's not like I can skip them but I can't just bring Ameline home.

I want to get married to her soon and even when there won't be a ceremony or a reception, I want to take her on a honeymoon. The two of us relaxing before the surgery and her treatments.

"Choose the one you like the most," I say, trying to encourage her to pick anything.

"Wow, this is . . ." She presses her lips into a thin line. "Romantic?"

I don't know if she's being sarcastic or not though. I just brush her cheek with the back of my hand and say, "Only for you." I lean in to kiss her softly.

When we break apart, the jeweler steps forward. "Congratulations to you both. If you want, I'll be happy to help you choose what's best for you."

Ameline glances around the displays, seeming overwhelmed. I give her hand a reassuring squeeze. "Take your time, baby. Get whichever one calls to you."

She wanders around the table stopping to take one, try it on, and then look at another. Nothing seems to catch her eye. Finally she stops, eyes fixed on a simple solitaire in a delicate platinum setting. "This one," she says softly.

"But that's small," I say.

"It's nice." She holds it up, admiring it. "Classy. Yeah, it's perfect," she whispers. A lone diamond glittering in her hand, simple yet elegant. Just like her.

I come up behind her and wrap my arms around her waist. "It looks beautiful." I kiss her temple, and she leans back against me.

"Let me get the box," the jeweler states. "I'll send the invoice?—"

"Make sure you send it to me and don't mention this visit to my family," I clarify before he calls anyone to congratulate them on my engagement.

He nods. "Of course. Discretion has always been part of the service."

Ameline turns around, her eyes searching mine. "Gabe, are you sure about this? We don't need to do it."

I cup her face in my hands. "I've never been more sure of anything. I want to be with you, Ameline, in every way, for the rest of our lives. I know the timing isn't perfect, but if not now, when? Does it feel right to you?"

She takes a shaky breath, tears pooling in her eyes. "Yes. Being with you feels right. I just don't want you to regret this if . . ."

I press my forehead to hers. "The only thing I'll regret is not telling you how I felt sooner. All I know is that I love you, and I want to marry you."

"I love you too," she whispers. A single tear tracks down her cheek as she smiles up at me.

I wipe away the tear and kiss her deeply, pouring all my love into it. She melts against me with a soft sigh.

When we finally pull back for air, I keep my arms wrapped tightly around her. "Stop doubting me okay?"

"I'm sorry. This is just too . . ."

"Soon?"

"No, too good to be true," she states.

"But it's not," I say. "You marrying me will make me the happiest man in the world."

I whoop and lift her up, spinning her in a circle as she giggles. When I set her down, I take her hand and slide the solitaire onto her finger. A perfect fit. Just like us.