Chapter Two

Talking to Jacob and Sebastian about taxes calmed me down. I was in a bit of a spin, but the brandy helped.

"You can have more, you know," Sebastian said, gesturing to my glass.

"I'm driving," I said.

"You know, Angel," Jacob murmured from his place behind the desk. "It's not always as easy as saying ‘I like girls' or ‘I like boys'. Sometimes you have to leave room for the possibility that your heart—and other organs—don't fit into a tidy little box. Plus, there are so many gender variations out there. Why limit yourself?"

"Yeah. I've been… curious …before. But I never expected to find another man— or men —to be more alluring than any of the women I've ever encountered." I shrugged.

Sebastian smiled and gave Jacob a knowing look.

"Anyway, I'd better get out of here. You'll email me the files and information?"

"Already done," Jacob said, closing his laptop. "How long do you think for you to prepare and submit?"

"Not long. A couple of weeks, maybe? I haven't got a ton of other business clients, and my personal clients have fairly straightforward paperwork."

I rejected their kind offer of a round of cards in the gaming parlor. I needed to get home, if only to wrap my head around everything I'd learned—about myself, and Vihaal and Gideon— and decide what the hell was happening and what I was going to do about it.

It was hard to believe there were so many bets on my sexual orientation. I'd mostly assumed I was straight and that I looked straight. Although if anyone had asked what looking straight meant, I couldn't have defined it.

Then again, the fact that I was comfortable hanging out with so many gay guys and coming into Maverick Molly's on a frequent basis was perhaps courting speculation. Maybe I was drawn to Jacob, Sebastian, Gideon, Vihaal and Maverick Molly's because it addressed something I'd been denying about myself for a long, long time.

Gideon and Vihaal seemed very happy together. Were they looking for something outside of their relationship? A fling? A fun afternoon? Initiate the supposedly straight, but probably bisexual, man into the world of gay sex?

What exactly did they want from me? The question left me with a strange, excited feeling in my gut. Maybe I should start listening to that normally quiet place inside me that seemed to be sending out flares to get my attention.

We shook hands and they followed me into the hall. I glanced toward the door to the Bordello—the kink room that Jacob and Sebastian rented out by the hour.

"You, uh, got anyone in there right now?" I asked, pretending a casual curiosity.

Jacob shook his head. He glanced at Sebastian, who seemed to be trying to keep from smiling.

"First booking is for eight," he said.

"Ah," I said. When we got to the rack of coats by the front entrance I gave them a wave goodbye. "I'll let you know when I've got everything ready for your signatures."

"Great meeting with you, Angel," Sebastian said.

They headed into the gaming parlor, from which the screech of microphone interference could be heard right before an amplified voice said, "Fuck this thing. Testing, testing."

I put on my coat as I headed for the door, but my finger caught in the sleeve and I tripped on a roll in the burgundy rug. I fell forward onto my knees, bracing myself with my hands so I didn't end up on my face.

"Fuck," I cursed, as the front door opened and a blast of cold air came in with two pairs of legs.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Angel Barnett."

I froze for a moment, my body reacting to that voice and tone before my brain did. My gaze tracked up the closest pair of legs, over an expensive-looking leather coat, up, up, and up, to a face the color of copper and a striking pair of blue eyes.

"Vihaal," I murmured, from my position near the floor as he gazed down at me with amusement and…something else.

I glanced to the man beside him.

Gideon, dirty blond hair artfully coifed and hazel doe-eyes dancing, crouched down to meet me at eye level, his blue cashmere coat draping softly over his thighs.

"Oh my God, Angel. Are you okay?" he asked.

"Hi," I said, finding myself transfixed by Gideon's pretty face, as if I'd jumped into another dimension.

I cleared my throat, blushing as I scrambled to right myself.

"Sorry. I was just with…" I gestured at the gaming parlor. "Jacob and Sebastian. Taxes. You know."

Gideon helped me up, while Vihaal gazed at me sedately.

"I've often wondered how you'd look on your knees before me, Angel," he said, with a benign smile.

Gideon threw him a look, then turned back to me.

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked, gazing at me with concern. "Don't listen to him, he's extra horny tonight. We have an appointment in the Bordello, doncha know."

Gideon glanced at Vihaal, and the conflagration of desire between them was almost a visible phenomenon. Vihaal looked at Gideon like he was picturing him splayed out naked on a table. Maybe that's what they were planning. I found myself wondering how that would look.

Another check mark in the bisexuality file.

"I'm fine. Thank you." I dusted my pants and straightened, gazing at Vihaal and pretending he hadn't made a reference to my knees. "Sorry."

He was watching me as if I were a strange species of bird or mammal.

"Why are you apologizing?" he asked, in that deep, dark voice that made me question everything about myself.

"You know what, Angel? In the Bordello," Gideon murmured, leaning forward. "V does nasty things to me and I fucking love every minute of it."

Air seeped out of my lungs in an audible sigh as my cock jerked and my brain went fuzzy.

Another check.

"Gideon. Don't be naughty," Vihaal said.

Gideon shrugged, blinking soft eyes at me.

"I might as well let him know what kind of man you are," Gideon purred.

Vihaal regarded me with those stunning green-blue eyes. "I'm very glad you didn't hurt yourself."

"Takes more than that to make a mark on me," I said, but only Gideon laughed.

I almost choked on my tongue while Vihaal looked me over.

I had to get out of here.

"Well then, have a good time," I said. "I've got to get home."

I made a hasty exit, making sure to be careful as I went outside and down the steps in the snowy darkness. The door shut behind me and I stopped, gulping deep breaths of frigid air.

I looked at the closed doors of Maverick Molly's. Part of me wanted to turn around and go back in, to join Vihaal and Gideon in the gaming parlor before they went to the Bordello. But they were on a date, or so it seemed, and maybe they would head directly to the back to do…whatever they did there.

I started walking again, imagining what nasty things Gideon fucking loved having done to him , and unable to stop the thought that came unbidden to my mind. Namely, that the view of Vihaal from my knees had not been so bad.

My car coughed and spluttered when I turned the key and I realized I'd need to take it in for a check-up soon. It was on its last legs but I was procrastinating shopping for a new one. I didn't want to research the options and go back to having a monthly car payment, although at this point that might be less expensive than maintaining this car.

As I drove I contemplated everything I'd learned from Jacob and Sebastian, while becoming progressively more distracted and horny. Now that I'd admitted that maybe I was physically attracted to two men whom I'd gotten to know over the past few months, my body had taken over like a dog let off leash for the first time.

It might have been the lingering effect of realizing I was attracted to them, and coming face-to-face—or face-to-leg—with them afterward. It also didn't make a whit of a difference that I'd had my dick sucked and more the night before. That all paled in comparison to the way I felt now, and I wondered what that meant.

My modest townhome was about a fifteen-minute drive from the club. It didn't look like much from the outside—or from the inside either, if I was being honest. But it was mine and it kept me and my two cats comfy and warm.

I felt relief at being home and somewhere familiar, and my cats greeted me at the door as if they'd never been fed in their lives. I felt like I was already a different person, because I'd finally realized something important about myself. Even though I didn't know if I was going to act on these unusual but undeniable feelings.

You're going to act on these feelings , a voice inside my head said in a smug tone, and I knew it was true.

A sudden realization hit me.

That when I'd been on my knees in the hallway at Maverick Molly's, staring up at Vihaal and Gideon, I'd been much more turned on than I'd been with the redhead from last night, even when she'd been naked in my bed and I'd known we were about to fuck.

What did that say about me?

I fed the cats, then took the half-drunk bottle of Chardonnay out of the fridge, pouring what was left into a tumbler-sized glass. This was no time for half measures. I put the now empty bottle on the counter and took the glass into the living room, sitting on the couch and absently picking up the remote control. For the next fifteen minutes I flipped through channels and drank the wine, until a sense of ease came over me. Maybe it was time that I faced the truth—that I wasn't only attracted to women, and that I had a thing for Gideon and Vihaal.

It seemed like I was the last to know. I didn't carry any internalized homophobia—my parents had been very openminded. In fact, my mother was bisexual—although now past the point of acting on it—and both of my parents had been open about sexuality and gender non-conforming people. My mom would speak fondly of her university days and the girlfriends she'd had during that time of her life. It occurred to me that refusing to entertain any departure from the straight narrative might have been my own small way of rebelling against my, admittedly unusual, upbringing. But I was thirty-six, and apparently my horizons were begging to be expanded. It was time I gave those feelings room to grow.

A sense of anticipation and excitement began to replace the feeling of being thrown off course, and upside down. Life was full of promise.

* * * *

I sat with this new awareness for two days, wondering what the hell to do or how to go about approaching the men with whom I was obsessing.

On the third day, as I was tidying the kitchen after lunch, my phone vibrated with Vihaal's number. The amount of joy that hit me when his name showed on the screen of my phone informed me that, for whatever reason, I had become very, very fond of him and Gideon. Then again, there was also nervousness, because Vihaal was an imposing and commanding presence. And I wanted to impress him.

"Hey," I said, trying to act casual. "Vihaal."

"Angel."

The sound of our breaths filled the silence. I tried to think of something to say.

"I heard you and Gideon had a bet going."

What the fuck am I doing?

There was silence, then Vihaal started to laugh.

"He knows about our bet," Vihaal said, and it took me a second to realize he wasn't speaking to me.

"Oh fuck," Gideon said. "Is he mad?"

"I've got you on speaker, Angel. That was Gideon. Are you mad?" he asked, with something that seemed like delight.

"Uh…not mad exactly. Surprised by all the…speculation."

"So, tell me then. Who won this bet? I'm very curious to find out."

My breathing got louder.

I swallowed. "Well…what was the exact wager?"

Vihaal gave a slow soft chuckle.

"Tell you what. Why don't you come over for a visit and we'll discuss it. Gideon has a recipe for tiny sandwiches he wants to try."

"Tiny sandwiches?" I asked.

"Also, I'm wondering if you'd look over some financials from Tarnish, the antique store I own. Sebastian suggested it might be a good idea."

"Sure. Yeah, I can do that."

"Angel!" Gideon spoke again. "I have a silver tiered platter and a recipe for triangle sandwiches that I don't get to use very often. We'd love to have you for afternoon tea!"

"Extravagance," Vihaal said in the background. Then he huffed a laugh. "Did you just make a rude gesture to me, Gideon?"

"Will you come? We haven't seen you properly in ages!" Gideon pleaded.

"How can I possibly refuse a silver tiered platter and triangle sandwiches," I said, only after the words had left my mouth realizing just how strange that sounded.

"Exactly. Is tomorrow okay? About three o'clock?" Gideon asked.

"Yes, that's fine," I said.

I was free. I wanted to see them. And this was absolutely happening.

"Wear something nice," Gideon whispered.

"What?" I said, my cock reacting to the timbre of his voice.

"Gideon, I am not amused. Give me the phone."

"Ta, ta," Gideon said.

"I'm so sorry, Angel. He's impossible."

I laughed.

"It's fine. He's…" I tried to think of a word to describe Gideon. "…something."

"Yes. Yes, he is. See you tomorrow."

After we'd ended the call, I thought about what Gideon had said. Did he want me to dress fancy? It was afternoon tea, after all. Or did he want me to dress…sexy?

I didn't have a clue how to dress sexy for two men who had finally made me realize I'd been living a lie.

* * * *

I wasn't used to losing sleep over anyone, but I tossed and turned with anticipation over the prospect of seeing the two of them again. I finally gave in and jerked off, mostly as a form of stress relief and a sleep aid, and if I'd had any doubt as to the sexual nature of my obsession with Gideon and Vihaal, their sexy performance in my fantasies laid that to rest. I'd never felt this way about any of the women I'd dated. I felt so out of my depth and like a total newb.

I'd already known about Tarnish, Vihaal's antique store. But I'd never seen the place and now I wanted to. I grabbed my phone and Googled it.

It looked like a cute spot. It was in Hintonburg—not exactly close to where they lived in Old Ottawa South. The word Tarnish was painted in fancy lettering over the front door.

I put my phone down and closed my eyes, finally drifting off to thoughts of Gideon making his triangle sandwiches.

* * * *

A soft ‘pat, pat, pat' on my cheek woke me out of a sound sleep.

"Fuck off," I mumbled, turning over.

Blessed silence for a few moments, then the sheet ever so subtly shifted and a ‘brrrrr' noise sounded in my face as a rough tongue swiped across my nose.

"Toff. Fuck off!" Seriously, this goddamn cat.

I opened my eyes. A fluffy white face, with a black patch over half of it, and two soft green eyes stared back at me.

"Brrrr?" Toff said. Which I translated to When the fuck are you gonna get up and feed me?

"Hi."

He lay down, but continued to stare at me with expectation. I glanced over to the chair by the window to see Rummy in her usual spot, letting Toff do all her dirty work.

Thoughts of two attractive, kinky gay men came back to mind, and I remembered the epiphany I'd had the day before.

"Oh, fuck," I said, groaning and reaching out a hand to ruffle Toff's fur. "I am so fucking fucked, it's not even funny." I couldn't help smiling. "And that might not be a euphemism."

When I sat up, Toff launched himself in the direction of the door, then stopped and looked back, his gaze saying Hurry the fuck up, you loser . Rummy gazed at me placidly from her perch. She was smart enough to know it would take me a minute to get going.

Their names were from the musical Cats . The really annoying one was Toff, short for Mr. Mistoffelees and the calmer one was Rummy, short for Rum Tum Tugger. I loved them, but man, it would have been nice to sleep in on occasion.

I reached over to unplug my phone and checked the notification screen. There was a message that was an obvious scam, and another from a Discord group I was a member of. But nothing as interesting as the text from Vihaal.

See you later today. We're really looking forward to it. Winky face.

I grinned, but nerves hit me at the thought of what might await me. Did he know I was questioning my sexuality? Did they already know how caught up in them I was?

I texted back.

Did you talk to Sebastian? He wasn't supposed to say anything…

There was a terrible crash from downstairs. I threw my phone onto the bed and ran behind Rummy down the stairs, skidding to a stop at the bottom.

Toff sat on the breakfast bar, licking his paw. What had been a semi-expensive vase was now in pieces on the kitchen floor, the bouquet of sunflowers I'd bought to cheer myself up scattered amongst the broken glass.

Wait a whole hot minute.

I remembered my phone, and the text from Vihaal. Then I recalled what I'd typed in response, and realized that if they hadn't known I'd discussed something relating to them with Sebastian and Jacob, they sure did now.

I ignored the mess on the floor, knowing the cats would be persnickety enough to avoid the area, and ran back upstairs. I launched onto the mattress and grabbed the phone. Was it possible to unsend a text?

But it was too late. Vihaal's reply had already come in.

Say anything about what? What does Sebastian know that I don't???

Oh, fuck my life. Maybe I could pass it off as a joke.

Laughing face emoji. I'm looking forward to afternoon tea.

Distraction was also effective. I kept typing.

I hope Gideon's making lots of little sandwiches. I can't wait to try some.

I hit send and waited with breathless anticipation.

The typing bubble popped up and the three dots danced for a few seconds.

Hmm. Is there something you'd like to tell me, Angel?

Fuck. No, no, no. I wasn't ready for this. I hadn't even had coffee.

He knew. He had to know. Everyone suspected. But I wasn't in the least bit prepared for this conversation.

See you at two. Waving hand.

Oh my God, I was such a coward. And my life had been a lie.

See you later. Face with a monocle.

Then a face with sunglasses. Then a…face with a birthday hat blowing a party favor?

Ha ha. It's not my birthday?

I know.

Wait. He knew. I knew he knew. Without even talking to Sebastian.

But…he didn't know I knew he knew. So, I would simply remain oblivious until he said something. And I'd face that when it happened.