Chapter Forty-three: Take My Name

Gia

TAKE MY NAME

Performed by Parmalee

Two months passed in what feltlike the flash of code along my computer screen. I spent my days alongside Ryder, helping him with the construction of the cabins. At first, he wouldn’t let me do much with my cast and bruised neck, but as I grew stronger and my body healed, I was able to wield a nail gun, one-armed, in a way that made his eyes grow heavy with lust whenever he stopped to watch me. It often ended with us taking breaks that Brandon, Shawn, and Ramon chuckled over and made my cheeks flush.

But I never said no. I liked the breaks. I liked being needed so much he couldn’t wait.

What I tried not to do was think about the Lovatos, the NSA, or anything to do with my job.

I worked my body to exhaustion and spent my nights being worshipped by a man who loved me more than I’d ever imagined a person could be loved.

While we finished the cabins, Addy studied with Rianne, learning and growing stronger in a different way. She now talked to all the family in complete sentences without ever wavering. But if Shawn or Ramon or any of the farm workers talked to her, she clammed right up. We weren’t sure if she’d ever adjust to a regular school, but there was no hurry or pressure to make her do so, even though Mila begged her almost every day to come with her so they could play together at recess.

I had a feeling Mila would get her way eventually. She usually did.

But as the cabins wound down to paint and decorations, which I wasn’t much help with, I had less and less to do. Eva seemed to read my restlessness and ordered me into the kitchen with her one day. Gearing up for six months of guests took more time and prep work than I’d expected. With Sadie’s hands full at the bar, Eva needed help baking and canning and freezing food, so I became her sous chef. After my cast came off and I had full use of my arms again, she taught me to roll dough and bake bread. She taught me to cook and bake in ways that would stun my mom when I finally made it home for a visit. I needed to make that happen soon, as everyone in my family called daily to make sure I was okay.

While I worked my body to exhaustion, I could forget about what I was going to do next. I loved the bubble I was in, even though I knew it couldn’t last. It would pop, and life would expect me to move in one direction or the other. For now, I concentrated on the satisfied feeling I had at the end of the day when I went home with Addy chatting in the back seat and Ryder sending me looks that promised another night with him in control and me being worshipped.

I always got in some adoration of my own.

Whatever else happened during the day, I always felt complete when Ryder and I were lying skin on skin in the moonlight.

Everything about my life felt right in those heartbeats.

In early March, Maddox came to the house one evening to pick up Mila after she and Addy had spent the afternoon playing together. He asked if he could have a word with me.

“Don’t give her a hard time,” Ryder grunted out.

And my stomach clenched. Was it something about the Lovatos? After the dust had settled and the initial questions had been answered about what had gone down with Laredo, I hadn’t responded to any of Leland’s messages. I’d done more than just take a vacation. I’d basically gone dark.

I’d answered Rory’s texts, but only when they were about personal things and not about the job. She and I often checked in on each other to make sure the relationships we’d chosen over the futures we’d seen for ourselves weren’t falling apart. When I’d left her in Cherry Bay with a boyfriend and his two siblings to raise in December, I hadn’t envied her the ready-made family. Now that I had Ryder and Addy, I couldn’t imagine giving them up, and I understood everything she’d done to keep her new family.

Maddox waved his cowboy hat in Ryder’s direction. “If she says no, she says no. I won’t push.”

Ryder headed downstairs to the game room where the girls were playing. I went to the refrigerator and pulled out two beers, waving one at Maddox in offering, who said, “No, but thanks. I’m not staying long.”

I put one back, cracked the top of the other, and took a swig.

“Four of us sheriffs with small offices around these parts have been discussing ways to combat the online crimes that are growing faster than we can say possum. None of us has the resources to hire a full-time cyber-crime investigator, but it’s clear we need one. We thought we might be able to pool some dollars together and create a multi-county unit. We’d be able to hire one person for sure, maybe two. My first thought was to offer the position to you.”

My throat clogged with a whole slew of emotions, and before I could respond, Maddox continued, “Now, it might look like nepotism, or like I’m offering you this in some attempt to get you to stay because I’ve never seen Ryder this happy in his entire life. Not with Rayvn. Not with anyone.”

“Maddox—”

“No, let me finish, please. I love my brother, and I want him to stay happy, but I also know that no matter if I offer you this job or not, you aren’t leaving him. You’ll figure something out. I also know you’re a damn good analyst. You brought down an entire fucking cartel with a few swipes of code.”

“Really, Rory did more of the coding.”

He huffed out a laugh that sounded very much like his brother. “What I’m saying is, we’d be lucky if you took the job. It likely won’t pay anywhere near what you’re getting with the NSA. The benefits are shit, and the hours would probably be even worse because we’d be dividing you over four counties.”

“You’re making this real tempting,” I teased, and he grinned.

“The advantage would be that you’d pretty much be your own boss. You’d be creating the unit, so you could do it the way you want without a ton of oversight.”

I took another sip of my beer. I’d put years of blood, sweat, and tears into my job at the NSA, crafting myself into a respected analyst. Living the spy dream. I’d loved the brain power it took to figure out the puzzle from the pieces left behind by the criminals. I’d enjoyed feeling like I’d done something worthy. I wanted that feeling again, but I also didn’t want to leave the bubble I’d created with Ryder and Addy.

“Would I be in the field?” I asked.

“Do you want to be in the field?” he responded.

The night at Laredo’s had changed everything for me. I didn’t want to leave my loved ones anymore. I didn’t want to risk Ryder and Addy losing someone else.

“I don’t think so,” I told him honestly with a shrug.

“Well, like I said, we aren’t sure exactly what the unit looks like, so you could shape it how you want. Toss the fieldwork to our deputies.”

It was hard to imagine something coming up that would be more handcrafted for me, for my skills, and for what I needed to keep me close to this family I’d embedded myself into. So, what was holding me back from jumping at it?

“Give it a thought. No rush,” he said just as the girls came up the stairs with Ryder on their heels.

Mila pouted and begged to stay, and Maddox held firm that it was a school night. They said their goodbyes and left us to our nighttime routine—Addy getting ready for bed and the three of us cuddling together as Ryder read stories from the growing pile of books in her room.

Once we were alone in our room, I slipped on a T-shirt and shorts, although, most nights they ended up on the floor.

Ryder drew me to him. “You’ve been quiet since Maddox left.”

“You knew what he was going to ask?” I didn’t know if I should be irritated by that or not.

He nodded, easily reading me, and said, “He told me. Not because he thought he needed my approval, but more as a heads-up so I wasn’t caught off guard.”

Brothers taking care of each other. I understood that, even though Holden and I were hardly able to do that for each other anymore with the way our lives were pulled across the globe in different directions. I didn’t say anything as I moved away, dragged the covers back, and climbed into bed. Ryder joined me, tugging me into his arms and holding me close. I could feel the pulse of his heart against my cheek. I’d never realized just how much of a comfort that could be, feeling the rhythm of his body seeping into mine as we ended our day.

I’d felt lonely that first night I’d arrived in town with Addy. Seeing Ryder with his family jumping to help at a traumatic moment had been overwhelming. But since the moment I’d kissed him, that loneliness had all but disappeared, and I never wanted it back.

“You don’t want the job?” he finally asked.

“It feels too good to be true, honestly.”

“But?”

“The NSA is all I’ve known. Leland has been more than a mentor. He’s been a friend. I brought Rory in, and now, if I walk away, I feel like I’d be letting them both down.”

Ryder didn’t say anything for a long time, but when he did, I knew he was right. “If they’re real friends, they’ll want you to be happy.”

“I need to talk to them.”

He nodded. “Not tonight. Tonight, I have plans for you.”

“You always have plans for me.”

“And I will every night for the rest of our lives. Take off those clothes, darlin’.”

And I did because I loved what he would do—what we would do to each other—once I did.

? ? ?

After another night spent in the arms of the man I loved, I talked with Rory and Leland. Leland was both happy and disappointed, saying, “I thought I’d get at least another ten years out of you, G. That cowboy is quite a bit older than you, isn’t he?”

I’d never considered the difference in Ryder’s and my ages before. Six years wasn’t all that much, was it? It didn’t matter, even if it was.

“I’ve already given him my heart. Promises I won’t break. I can’t. It would break me too,” I told him honestly.

“That county job won’t pay much. Let me put you in our consultant database. Rory can run things by you. It can supplement what you’re getting there.”

“As long as I don’t have to travel, I’ll consider it.”

When I talked with Rory, she was nothing but happy for me.

I hung up and went in search of my growly rancher, who was hardly ever grumpy these days, with my heart full and at peace. I’d have to close up my apartment in Maryland and go get my things, but there wasn’t anything there I couldn’t live without. The only things I really needed I already had.

? ? ?

Two weeks later, spring had finally sprung fully, sending the scent of magnolias into the air as flowers and trees bloomed across the ranch. With the cabins completed, the first guests due to arrive in a week, and my new job with the four counties’ cyber-crime unit starting the following week, Ryder and I had been reveling in a few unencumbered days. We’d woken late each morning, slowly getting ready, and arrived later and later at the ranch. Instead of working, Ryder took Addy and me riding, teaching us both how to handle the horses, and leading us to all his favorite corners of the property.

We often stopped by the cemetery where Natalia was now buried with a headstone that read RAVYN EOWYN HATLEY, the name she’d chosen for herself. Addy always brought wildflowers she’d collected, and we typically left her alone so she had a few quiet moments with her mama.

Every moment with Ryder and Addy felt real and poignant and sweet.

Daily movie scenes I wanted to keep forever. That I felt lucky to have made mine.

The Thursday before I was set to start my new job, Ryder stole my jeans from my hand as I was getting ready and tossed them on the bed.

He hooked me around the waist, placed a kiss on my neck, and said, “Mama and Sadie are taking you to the spa at The Beehive Lodge today. Full works. Massage. Facial. Whatever the hell else a spa day means.”

“What?” I’d barely registered his words because, like always, his kisses were sending all thoughts from my head.

“You’re going to be spoiled on your birthday,” he grunted out.

I spun in his arms so I could face him. “How did you find out?”

“You’re not the only one with sleuthing skills.”

I chuckled. “Holden told you?”

My brother and Ryder had been sending sporadic texts ever since the night at Laredo’s. It was as if my family needed someone to verify I was actually healing—as if I wouldn’t tell them the truth. At first, it had stung a bit, but after years of lying to them about what I did, it wasn’t necessarily surprising. And truth be told, I was secretly pleased my brother and the man I loved had found some common ground. I wanted my family to love the Hatleys as much as I did.

Ryder shrugged. “Maybe. Or maybe I just read the date on your driver’s license.”

I huffed out another laugh. “Thank you for trying to do something nice for me, but I’m not really good at letting people touch me.”

Ryder’s eyes grew dark, and his fingers skimmed along my bra. My nipples instantly went hard, and my core ignited. That was all it ever took. A simple touch and I was gone. I kissed him, tongue tangling with his, and our bodies notched together automatically. Coming home.

He pulled away, waving a finger at me. “Don’t distract me, darlin’. As I’m not sure I’m in love with the idea of someone touching you either, I don’t care if you skip the massage. But you will go with Mama and Sadie. They want to do this for you, and I have other stuff to take care of.”

My lips quirked upward. “Bossy much? And what other stuff? What exactly are you planning, cowboy?”

He pushed a lock of hair behind my ear, saying with a sudden gentleness that captured my heart all over again, “Let me keep it a surprise for a few more hours.”

He never lied to me. Never. And now this was his way of asking me not to force him to while he did something nice for me. How could I ever say no to that?

“Fine. I’ll go with Eva and Sadie.”

The smile he gave me was enough to make me want to give him anything he ever asked just to see him light up like this. When he was happy, he looked more like Addy than ever. Or she looked like him? All I knew was that when they both let their guards down and let the joy overtake them, they were absolutely radiant. Stars that I felt lucky to call mine.

? ? ?

After Eva and Sadie picked me up, I’d bypassed the massage but agreed to the facial, manicure, pedicure, and hair trim that made me feel a bit like a movie star. Pampered. Rested.

We feasted on chicken and dumplings for lunch at Tilly’s Café, with Tilly hovering around us, yapping about all the latest gossip in town, including how Willy the mechanic had found himself a new girlfriend. Everyone was hoping this one would last so he didn’t spend another two years crying into his beer at McFlannigan’s.

After our meal, I was whisked away to the mall where they pushed me into a chair in the makeup aisle and hmm’d and ha’d while a makeup artist lined my eyes and my lips. Then, they insisted I pick out a dress and new shoes, as if I’d put up a fight. Little did they know…I didn’t mind shopping. I just rarely had the time anymore, and my simple wardrobe had been what I needed while working for the NSA. But there’d been a point in my teen years when I’d thought shopping was the only good solace for a broken heart. Now, my heart was full, and I still didn’t mind shopping.

I chose an off-the-shoulder floral dress that it was a little too chilly for yet but would be nice and cool once the Tennessee humidity kicked in. I skipped the shoes, insisting I liked the way my blue cowboy boots, scuffed and scraped as they were, looked with the bright magenta and blue flowers. So, they took me to a shoeshine station and had my boots buffed and polished.

By the time we were done, it was nearing dinnertime, and they said we were due back in Willow Creek at McFlannigan’s. That was when I felt the first flutter of nerves hit my stomach. Ryder had said he’d had a surprise, but I thought it was nothing more than dinner and cake at our house with his family showing up.

“Anything I need to be prepared for?” I asked.

Eva and Sadie exchanged soft smiles, and my heart tripped again.

We parked in front instead of out back in the parking lot like the family usually did. What exactly was I walking into? I drew my shoulders back, lifted my chin, and swallowed hard, wishing for the first time in two months that I’d had time to do my sleuthing and uncover enough of Ryder’s secret not to be nervous.

Sadie and Eva walked inside in front of me, but as they stepped to the side, a bar full of people screamed, “Surprise!” and then burst into the happy birthday song. In the dim light, my gaze settled on Ryder with Addy next to him. Shock flew through me as I saw her in a dress for the first time since I’d met her. It was purple, and she wore it with a pair of tan cowboy boots. Her long black hair was twisted into two braids, and she smiled shyly, tucking into her dad when she saw me.

When I turned my eyes to Ryder, my heart slowed to a complete stop as it often did when I saw him after a few hours apart. He had on dark-washed jeans that hung low on his hips and a striped blue button-down that made his eyes pop even at a distance. His cowboy hat was missing and his dark hair gleamed, making me want to run my hands through it and mess it up. But it was the smile on his face as it widened and grew that made my feet come to a complete halt. I wanted to shout, “I love you!” across the bar. I wanted to run to him like one of those romance movies I’d never wanted to watch, where the heroine and hero find their way across a field of flowers.

As my feet seemed frozen, Ryder came to me. He picked me up, shoved his face in the crook of my neck, and spun me around. When we came to a halt, I was facing the door again. He put me down, kissed me softly, and whispered, “Happy birthday, darlin’.” And my entire body burst into flames.

He grinned, eyes slowly strolling down over my body in the lightweight dress in a way that made me afraid I’d be showing nipples to the entire bar. “Damn, you look beautiful. How the hell am I going to get through the next few hours with you looking like this?” he asked quietly, leaning in to kiss my forehead.

“You should have thought about that before you threw me a surprise party in a very public space.”

“There’s always Phil—Sadie’s office.” He winked but then took my hand and twirled me around so I was facing the entirety of the room. “But first, there are some people who’ve come a long way to see you.”

When I saw them, tears filled my eyes, and then I was pulling away from Ryder to run through the tables and chairs until my dad caught me in his arms and held on tight.

Standing at an impressive six foot three that my brother matched, Dad appeared exactly the military man he was, even in jeans and a dress shirt he rarely wore. The white at his temples was hardly noticeable with his dark-blond hair shaved down to stubble.

“You’re here!” I practically shouted, turning from him to my mom.

Her face was one large smile that was echoed in her eyes, the faint lines around them barely visible. Her dark hair was still thick and full without a hint of gray, which I was vain enough to hope I inherited.

Mom hugged me tight, saying, “Happy birthday.”

Ryder joined me, my smile widened, and I grabbed his hand, squeezing tight, trying to communicate how much what he’d done by bringing my family to me meant. “You’ve all met, I see.”

“Ryder picked us up at the airport,” Dad said, voice booming through the bar. “Set us up in some very nice cabins at the ranch.”

“How long will you be here?” I asked.

“A couple of days. Holden and Leya wished they’d been able to come, but they said to give you a squeeze from them,” Mom replied, giving me another hug.

Eva and Brandon joined us, and pretty soon, everyone was chatting and talking. My heart skittered around at seeing them all together. It was almost like that flash I’d gotten when Ryder and I had been all dressed up for the gala—with our families together, getting along. It sent a chill up my back in the very best kind of way, and my eyes filled with tears I refused to shed.

Instead, I concentrated on the people and enjoyed the food, cake, and alcohol that had been served, drinking enough to be just a bit tipsy.

I was watching Sadie teaching Mila and Addy a line dance when Mom found me again, tucking her arm through mine and pulling me close. “You’re happy.”

“More than I ever thought possible,” I told her the truth.

“I’m pretty excited myself,” she said, and I turned to look at her, brows furrowing. She smiled. “I finally have a grandbaby.” She looked back at Addy, and I thought my chest might just explode with joy and love. Then, she looked at me with a sly smile. “Think I might get another one?”

I laughed. “Ask Holden. He’s the one getting married in, what, three months?”

“I’ll take all the grandbabies I can get.”

“Then you should have had more kids.”

She laughed and patted my cheek as a muscled arm wrapped around my middle, tugging me into a solid chest. The song changed, a slow and broody rhythm bursting through the bar.

“Can I have this dance?” Ryder asked, gritty voice low and sexy in my ear.

Next to me, Mom said, “I think I’ll get what I want sooner than you think,” before she walked away with a grin on her face.

Ryder pulled me onto the dance floor, tugging me close, an arm around my lower back and a hand twining in my hair at the base of my neck. “What did she say she wanted?” he asked.

“Grandkids,” I said with a raised brow.

If I’d expected it to freak him out, it didn’t. He just smiled that slow, knowing smile that had once made me want to knock it off his face. “Yeah. How many?”

“She’d like a whole schoolroom full of them, but she’s not getting her way.”

His smile grew, and the beauty of it made me wish we were alone in our room with the moonlight pouring in. “No? How many is she getting?” he asked.

I leaned up, kissing him softly. “We’ll have to negotiate. I remember someone saying he wanted a dozen. I think I can compromise somewhere around two.”

“That’s not a compromise, darlin’. That’s cutting it to the bare bones.”

“For someone who never saw kids in her future, two sounds like a hundred.”

His smile slipped slightly. “You’re right. You’ve already given up enough. I’ll settle with whatever number you decide works.”

That twisted my chest tight. “You once told me you didn’t want me to have to give up everything I wanted to be with you. Same goes for you. We’ll figure out the right number.”

He kissed me, tongue sneaking in and taking the kiss in a flash from a sweet one, acceptable on a dance floor with our families watching, to one that would need a dark room and no witnesses.

“Perhaps, before you need to get a room, you should remember Gia’s present!” Sadie laughed as she walked by us.

We broke apart, grinning.

“There’s more?” I asked.

Ryder spun me out of his embrace, holding my hand and then spinning me back. As I got closer to his body, he bent down on one knee, and all the breath left my body.

He held out something small and glittery, but I couldn’t look at it because I was mesmerized by the look of love and joy in those bright-blue eyes.

“Gia Kent, you whipped into my life with a gun, a badge, and snark that I thought I’d hate but was really the missing part of my soul. You brought me a daughter I’d thought I’d lost, filling cracks in me I’d been trying to heal for years. And then, you did me the honor of giving me your love on top of it, giving me the gift of a partner along with a child. While I don’t need this ring or the words I do or a piece of paper to tell me how permanent the bond we’ve forged is, I’m hoping you’ll agree to marry me anyway so the rest of the world can see what our hearts already feel. I love you, darlin’, with all my damn broody heart has to give. So, what do you think? Will you marry me?”

I rubbed my hand over the bristles of his beard he’d long since grown back and that I absolutely adored, then covered his hand holding the ring with my other one and tugged him to his feet. “I thought giving control of my life to someone else would be impossibly difficult. But instead, giving you my heart, my life, and my future has been the easiest thing I’ve ever done. The easiest decision I’ve ever made. I’m yours, and if that means walking down an aisle and saying I do, it’ll be my joy to do so.”

“Make it easy for the man, G. Just say yes,” my dad shouted.

I laughed, leaned in, and kissed Ryder quickly before saying, “Yes. It would be my honor to marry you.”

The bar erupted into shouts of joy. Addy collided with our legs, hugging us tight. Ryder lifted her so she was between us. Our faces were full of light and love and happiness.

And all I could think was, this was the life I’d been intended to have all along.

No spy movie. No sleuthing.

Just forever, giving and receiving.