23. The Boyfriend Special

23

THE BOYFRIEND SPECIAL

D ecember 6th, Friday, 10:32 a.m.

LILA: Bristol, why did you add “No Hands” by Waka Flocka Flame to my preshoot playlist?

brISTOL: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

LILA: That is NOT an emotionally empowering chick anthem.

brISTOL: Have you heard the lyrics? Of course it is. I really do love the way your booty go.

LILA: I’m not trying to get “lit” before every photoshoot.

brISTOL: Hey, I just wanted to remind you how sexy you are.

LILA: You make that very clear. You basically send me a message every day telling me how hot I am.

brISTOL: It’s my job as your boyfriend to tell you. I even sent you my Lila photo album with all my favorite pictures of you.

LILA: Oh, I’ve seen it. You made the cover a picture of me in my unicorn onesie while I was inhaling my second plate of taquitos.

brISTOL: You look so cute with your mouth full .

LILA: If you turn this into a blowjob joke, I’m blocking you.

brISTOL: Me? I would never . But I love how your mind goes there.

LILA: Ugh. You’re insufferable.

brISTOL: Just one of my many incredible qualities. *winky face emoji*

LILA: I’m removing the song.

brISTOL: I found an acapella version if you want that instead. Or a Christian remix.

LILA: …

brISTOL: *smiling face emoji*

LILA: Stop that.

brISTOL: Sorry, can’t help it. It’s a permanent state whenever you talk to me.