50. Chapter 50

Chapter fifty

H aven didn't remember walking out into the gardens to meet Roman. The entire walk her head rang with Elanors words. According to her, war would be inevitable. The crown regent may not have a lot of support but Haven knew he had enough to cause a problem.

"Hey H!" Roman called out to her

Haven waved. Walking faster towards the table he was sitting at, she hardly noticed the blooming rose bushes along the way. She had barely sat down before Roman was asking,

"Are you alright?"

"I honestly don't know" She told him, a single tear trailing down her cheek. Pictures of war, death and battle flashed through her mind. Normally being able to conjure a picture in her mind was one of Havens most treasured abilities, even when she believed she was human. Now all she wanted was for the images flashing through her head to disappear.

Havens breathing quickened, her hands started to tremble. She knew she was on the verge of an anxiety attack. It had been awhile since she'd had one so Haven figured she was overdue. It may not be quick but normally she was able to calm herself by using deep breathing techniques her last therapist had taught her and wrapping herself up in her favorite blanket.

It often took awhile, sometime hours, before Haven was able to fully calm herself but she always returned to normal. Reminding herself that while it may not feel like it in that moment, everything would return to normal, everything would be okay in the end, also aided her in calming down. She'd once even considered tattooing the words, all will be well , across the inside of her arm as a visual reminder of hope for the future.

The problem with her usual solutions was that no matter how many times she told herself everything would be okay, this was the one time she wasn't sure it would.

Romans voice echoed through her mind, as if it was coming from somewhere far away.

"Haven," He spoke calmly, "Breathe, take a breath"

His large hand covered hers in her lap. Through the fog in her mind she could see him crouched in front of her chair. The calming feel of his warm hand helped pull her back to the present. Haven could feel Romans water magic pulsing around her. A cool stream flowed around her ankles, across her forehead and the back of her neck that was exposed thanks to her braid.

The familiarity and comfort her friend offered aided in calming her racing heart. His hand over hers helped stop the shaking. It took a few moments but Havens body returned to normal. At least, as normal as it could.

"Are you alright?" He asked again

"Yeah I think I'll be okay" Haven squeezed his hand and offered a weak smile she didn't really mean.

"What brought that on?"

"Do you think Drailia is going to fall into war after I'm crowned?"

Roman released a breath. Breaking eye contact, he moved to sit cross legged on the ground.

"I honestly don't know. It all depends on the size of the crown regents forces. On just how many fae will be on his side."

Haven was thankful he knew what she was talking about, keeping her from having to explain. The idea that Roman could have been part of the ‘we' Elanor mentioned crossed Havens mind. She quickly dismissed the thought, he had come here at the same time she did and had no contact with Elanor since she wasn't his teacher. Plus, he was her friend and Haven doubted he'd keep something that important from her.

"Has that been happening a lot since you got here?" Roman asked, concern evident in his expression.

Haven shook her head, she appreciated his concern but she really did not want to go over details.

"If something like that happens again, will you tell me?"

"You'll probably be in Norwood" Haven tried to keep her tone light but the nervousness about her friend being so far away showed through.

"I'll never be too far away. Whether it's through letters, or by way of a ship to come and visit, I will always be here for you."

Haven smiled, a much fuller and real one this time.

"There's that smile!" He exclaimed, pausing for a second before adding in a lower tone,

"We have the beginnings of a very strong alliance between us. When I get to Norwood I will secure something stronger. Norwoods rulers backed Shaston all those years ago when Niks father took over so we know they won't stand behind him."

Unexpected relief flowed through Haven. Even if it did come to war she'd have allies, people who supported her. That was something she needed to remind herself of more often.

"I feel much better now, thank you"

"Good" Roman said, giving her hands one last squeeze before standing and reclaiming his chair.

"Enough words of war. How is your training going? I feel like we haven't talked in ages!" Haven spoke, trying to move past such hard hitting topics.

"It's been good," He told her, "My magic is coming along very well. I can channel a mean flood, enough to knock my trainer right off his feet!"

Haven laughed deeply. Roman conjured a bubble of water, floating it into the space between them before forcing it to take different shapes. Haven joined the fun, casting tendrils of both fire and shadow to chase around his water bubbles.

They stayed like that for hours, sundown had long since passed but the darkness did nothing to sway them from their spots across from each other, simply practicing their burgeoning magic and spending time in friendly company. Eventually, the laughter winded down, quiet joined in and the cold night air started to seep through their clothes. It didn't take long in the cold for Haven and Roman to end the night with a hug and promises to make more time for their friendship.

Haven exhaled on her walk back to her room, the stress from earlier gone from her body thanks to Romans company. She truly hoped nothing else would pop up tonight to get in the way of her relaxed state. Unlocking and opening her door, it was all too obvious that that was not the way the rest of tonight would play out.