3 HOW WILL I SUFFER HIM?

"ARE YE SURE ye are happy to embark on this mission, Astrid?" Mairi asked, lowering the arrowhead she held. She was about to insert it into the split end of a yew shaft.

Astrid glanced up from where she'd been winding a thin coil of rope around her own arrow, securing the iron point in place, before grimacing. "I'm happy enough about the mission itself," she replied. "Just not the company."

"Ye aren't nervous about meeting with the Macleods then?"

"A little," Astrid admitted. "Who knows how difficult Tormod Macleod will be?" She paused then, her mouth quirking. "However, negotiating is what I do best. I enjoy pitting my wits against others … and I'm pleased Loch is putting his trust in me."

Finishing securing the arrowhead, she made a quick knot and then placed the shaft in the long basket at her feet, where a pile of completed arrows was steadily growing. It was her and Mairi's habit, in the late afternoon before supper, to do a little ‘women's work'— yet, today, there was a huge batch of arrows that had to be made.

"I'm in awe of ye," Mairi replied then, a smile flowering across her face. "Ye know that?"

Astrid inclined her head. "Really?"

"Aye."

"Why?"

"I like that ye are a woman who constantly forgets her place."

Astrid laughed at that, the sound traveling through the women's solar, where the two ladies sat. "I'm not sure my brother enjoys that aspect of my character," she admitted, shaking her head.

Mairi's dark-gold eyes twinkled. "Aye, he does … Loch needs strong women in his life, or his arrogance would get out of hand."

Astrid snorted another laugh, even as her chest constricted.

She wanted to think of herself as being ‘strong'—like Mairi was. However, recent events had made her doubt herself. Aye, she could be feisty and opinionated at times, but that wasn't what truly mattered. It was how a person dealt with a crisis that showed their true mettle.

And Mairi had shown hers. She'd weathered much in her life, including a broken heart when Loch had departed for war. Then, after her father died, she'd taken over the running of his inn. She was kind and big-hearted. However, as Loch had discovered, Mairi wasn't to be underestimated. Under her gentle fa?ade was strength, resilience, and a will of iron. As such, she'd stepped into her new life was ease.

The two women fell into a companionable silence then, each focusing on their task. Meanwhile, the clang of metal from the weaponsmith in the outer courtyard drifting in through the small window was a constant reminder of what was coming.

Astrid's mood sobered as she worked. The castle had been in turmoil all day, following the news of the Mackinnon fleet bearing down on Dounarwyse. Loch had already sent scouts north to report on what was happening at the broch, while he readied his men to join the Macleans of Dounarwyse the following morning.

Everything was changing. It felt as if she were standing on shifting sand. Queasiness rose then, making her belly churn as she thought of the violence to come. For years, her father had indulged in skirmishes with his northern neighbors, yet things were different now.

This was no skirmish but a reckoning between their clans—one that would decide everything.

Eventually, when Astrid had completed another five arrows, she set aside her work and rose to her feet. Stretching her limbs, which were stiff from sitting for hours, she went to the window. "It's difficult to concentrate," she muttered. "What with blood about to be spilled. "

"Aye," Mairi agreed softly. A rustle of fabric followed as her sister-by-marriage rose to her feet and joined her at the window. Together they watched as men-at-arms hurried across the outer courtyard. Horses whinnied, and urgent male voices called to each other.

Finn strode into view then, his lean form tense with purpose while he shouted something to one of the stable lads who was idling nearby.

Astrid's gaze narrowed as she observed her nemesis. Objectively, she knew the man was attractive. Tall, his lean form clad in close-fitting leathers, he moved with restless energy. His sharp features were set in a determined expression this morning, his hazel gaze narrowed slightly. A breeze ruffled Finn's light-brown hair, which brushed the collar of his fur-edged cloak. He was a man filled with impatience. Astrid didn't think she'd ever seen him relax, not truly.

Her mouth thinned in anticipation of the journey ahead.

"God's blood, how will I suffer him?" she breathed, voicing her thoughts aloud.

"Don't worry, Astrid," Mairi replied after a brief pause. "It won't be as bad as ye think."

Astrid cut her sister-by-marriage an affronted look to see that Mairi was watching her closely. "No," she muttered. "It'll be worse."

"Do ye really hate him that much?"

Astrid inhaled sharply. Although Mairi had been living at Duart for months now, this was the first time she'd directly brought Finn up. Usually, they skirted around him in conversation, and when Astrid made the odd scathing comment, Mairi chose to ignore it.

Not so today though—perhaps Loch's response to their feuding earlier had emboldened her, for she continued to hold Astrid's eye steadily, unbothered by her glare.

"Aye," Astrid admitted after a few moments. "He's a thorn in my side … one that has festered for years now. Every time I set eyes on him, I remember what he did to Maggie."

Mairi's gaze shadowed at this admission. "Ye loved her very much, didn't ye?"

Astrid nodded, her throat thickening. Even now, over a decade later, grief still welled inside her whenever she thought of her dear friend. "She was the sister I never had," she whispered.

"What was Maggie like?" Mairi asked, placing a gentle hand on Astrid's arm.

Astrid's mouth curved. "She was small and birdlike, with a mop of wild curly brown hair and eyes of the brightest blue ye have ever seen … and she had a love for adventure." She paused then, her smile fading. "She was a fisherman's daughter though … and my parents didn't approve of our friendship. I used to sneak away to see her when we were bairns … I taught her how to ride a pony, and together, we explored the coast."

"So, yer parents grew to accept the two of ye being friends?"

Astrid sighed. "Not really … but they had their hands full with Loch. He was wild and difficult, and after Jack and Finn's arrival, he got himself into all kinds of trouble. They eventually chose to ignore my friendship with Maggie." Astrid's gaze shifted then, back to the courtyard below, where Finn was now deep in discussion with the new marshal. Her brow furrowed. "But he destroyed everything."

Mairi didn't reply to that, and Astrid's mind traveled back, remembering the day she and Maggie had been walking home after visiting the market at Craignure. They'd met Loch, Jack, and Finn on the track. Loch had been dismissive, as usual, and Jack teasing, while Finn had said little. Even then, he'd been someone who gave little away about himself.

However, his gaze had never left Maggie's face as she excitedly told him about the juggler they'd watched at market. Astrid had marked how her friend's cheeks flushed, how she flirted and giggled. Jealousy had spiked through Astrid as she watched them—a complicated sensation, for she didn't like being left out. She'd also known, instinctively, that someone else was about to intrude on the bond she and Maggie shared.

She'd been right. That had been the beginning of things.

And a few months later, Maggie Garvie was dead.

"We'd better get back to work," Astrid said with a sigh. Talking about the past was wearying. It brought everything back to the surface. "Those arrows won't make themselves."

"Aye … come on." Mairi turned from the window, her hand straying to her midriff.

"Can ye feel the bairn?" Astrid asked, stilling .

Mairi nodded, her eyes wide.

"It's early, isn't it?"

"The midwife said I would be able to feel something around four moons in … and that's where I am," Mairi replied. Her fingers spanned over her midsection, which had yet to show any signs of pregnancy. A smile tugged at her mouth. "I must tell, Loch."

Astrid nodded, flashing her sister-by-marriage an excited smile. "Aye, go to him then."

Mairi moved toward the doorway. "I'll be back soon to help with the rest of the arrows."

"Don't worry, I can finish here," Astrid called after her.

Watching as her sister-by-marriage departed, Astrid thought about Mairi and Loch, and the new life they'd made together. And, despite her worries about what lay ahead, a smile lingered on her lips.

It warmed her soul to see them both so happy.