Chapter 38

Katja~

I wasn't sure what time it was, but when I finally woke up from either a nap or a twenty-four-hour recovery session, I felt worse than I'd had when Klive had shot me. My entire body was sore, and I still felt beyond exhausted.

As I sat up from the bed, I noticed that Maksim's cat hadn't moved an inch, and it still floored me that Maksim Barychev had a cat as a pet. When I thought about men like Maksim, I pictured Rottweilers and Doberman Pinschers as suitable pets for members of the bratva, not a conceited feline.

At any rate, I managed to make my way to the adjoining restroom, and though it took quite an amount of effort, I was able to undress myself, then get into the shower. Granted, there hadn't been much to undress after Maksim had removed my ruined clothing, then had slipped an over-sized t-shirt on me. Of course, that didn't leave me with much to wear after this shower, but I honestly didn't care. My main priority was to get home to my grandfather as quickly as possible. Whether Maksim had spoken to him or not, I knew that he was going to have lots of questions that only I could answer.

After taking my shower, I put my underwear back on, then went in search of a clean shirt and some shorts or sweats. I also didn't care that I might be invading Maksim's privacy by looking through his drawers. At this point, there wasn't a whole lot of consideration that he deserved from me.

Once I was dressed in another t-shirt and a pair of joggers that I'd had to roll up and adjust the waistband, I left the room in search of Maksim. When we had arrived earlier, yesterday, or whenever it'd been, I hadn't had a chance to look around, but now that I was walking around freely, Maksim Barychev had a very nice home. Whatever he did for the bratva, it was very profitable.

When I finally heard some voices breaking through the silence, I headed their way, and that's how I found myself in Maksim's kitchen, and in it were Maksim, Avgust Kotov, and a blonde too beautiful to be real. She looked like she belonged in a Barbie box, her blonde hair falling elegantly around her shoulders, and her blue eyes as bright as crystals. If she was Samara Kotov, then Avgust Kotov was a very lucky man.

As soon as Maksim saw me, he rushed over, his hand reaching for my waist. "What are you doing out of bed, lyublyu?"

"I needed a shower, and I'm hungry," I answered tiredly.

"Then you should have called for me," he replied, clearly annoyed with me.

"I was able to manage," I drawled out as he led me to one of the kitchen chairs. "Lochlan did a good job of wrapping my leg and fingers."

"That's beside the point," he bit out.

"I'm hungry, Maksim," I sighed. "If you want to fight, then you're going to have to wait until I've eaten something."

"Why don't you two go get us some Romero's?" the blonde suggested. "I find that I could probably eat a little something myself."

"You are a horrible liar, Razh," Avgust said. "However, if you wish us to leave, we can do that."

The blonde grinned. "I wish you to leave, though I am serious about Romero's. While it's past dinner time, you can grab me an order of pizzelle cookies for dessert."

In absolute amazement, I watched Avgust Kotov walk over to the blonde, kiss her on her forehead, then ask, "What would you like from Romero's, Ms. Volkov?"

"I…uhm, I don't know their menu," I admitted, Romero's way too expensive for my pocketbook.

"Then I will bring back a little of everything," Maksim said. "Whatever you do not like, we can offer to the guards."

"Thank you," I muttered for lack of something better to say. It was obvious that the blonde was in charge, and I didn't know what to make of that.

As soon as Maksim and Avgust left the kitchen- but not before Maksim kissed me on my temple -the blonde took a seat across the table from me as she introduced herself. "Hello, I'm Samara Kotov."

"Didn't…didn't Mr. Kotov call you Razh?" I asked like an idiot.

She grinned. "It's his nickname for me. It means rage, and he's been calling me that since high school."

My brows shot upward in surprise. "You've been with Avgust Kotov since high school?"

"It's a long story, but I did meet Avgust and Maksim in high school," she answered. "In fact, I've known them all since high school."

Knowing that she sent the men off for a reason, I finally asked, "So, are you going to tell me why you sent the guys to go get dinner when I could have just had a sandwich, Mrs. Kotov?"

She grinned again. "Firstly, please call me Samara. Mrs. Kotov is my mother-in-law, and though I adore her, I'm just not that formal. We get along wonderfully, and as long as she's alive, then she's the one that should be addressed as Mrs. Kotov."

"What do the guards and other people call you when they have to address you?" I asked, slightly curious as to how Avgust Kotov would feel about her casual familiarity.

"They've no choice but to call me Mrs. Kotov, but I really wouldn't care if they called me by my first name," she answered. "In fact, I'd prefer it if they did, but there are some battles that I have to let Avgust win."

"It must be…different to be married to the head of the Russian Bratva," I remarked, feeling wholly unsophisticated.

Her face softened. "You asked why I sent the guys away, and it was so that we'd have a chance to talk. I understand that you're having...well, that you're having some major doubts about Maksim."

I let out a hollow laugh. "I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you know, considering."

"Katja, I know because I'm Avgust's wife," she quickly corrected. "I know because I needed to know everything that was happening with Nikel Ovchinnikov…or Klive Simpson as you knew him to be."

"Why?"

"As the wife of the Pakhan, it's good business for me to know everything," she explained. "If something were to ever happen to Avgust, I'm safest by knowing everything that he knows."

"Okay, that makes sense," I agreed. "However, what's the point of this? Why care what happens between me and Maksim?"

"Because I've been where you are, Katja," she replied candidly. "I know what it's like to be in love with a man that has betrayed everything that you've ever felt for him."

"Oh, Mr. Kotov also had sex with you in front of rooms full of strangers," I deadpanned.

"No," she replied easily, ignoring my sarcasm. "He chained me to a room in one of their torture facilities, then left me there where one of his men tried to rape me."

I could feel shame creep up my spine. Like most people, nothing ever happened until it happened to you, and I'd just fallen into that category. I was acting like worse things didn't happen to other people all the time. I was acting like Maksim had owed me something, and he'd hadn't. I'd been the one that had invaded his life, not the other way around. So, while what he'd done was unforgiveable, I wasn't exactly without blame myself. After all, I had signed up to betray a member of the Russian Bratva, and the repercussions could have been a lot worse.

"If I didn't have feelings for him, this would be so much easier to deal with," I admitted.

"Feelings are the messiest things around," she agreed. "However, I've known Maksim Barychev since I was a teenager, Katja. So, I can tell you that he will never let you go. A man like Maksim doesn't love easily, and I'm pretty sure that Akim and his two nephews are the only other people that he's ever loved."

That had my brow furrowing. "What about his friendship with-"

Samara put her hand up to stop me. "Maksim's relationships with the bratva are about loyalty, Katja. In fact, most everyone's relationships within the organization are about loyalty. That's the foundation upon which the bratva was built upon. Now, while I'm sure that Maksim has some love for Avgust as they've been best friends since before I'd met either of them, loyalty is what keeps him by Avgust's side, not love."

"So, what are you saying?"

Her face softened again. "I'm saying that you need to find a way to work through your feelings of resentment towards Maksim, or else you're just going to end up miserable. Maksim is not going to let you go, and even if he was willing to do so, you'd never be safe."

"I could always move," I told her, repeating the same thing that I'd said to Maksim.

"You could," she quietly agreed. "Or you could stay here, work things out with Maksim, and get the best care possible for your grandfather." She must have noticed the look on my face, because she quickly added, "I'm not trying to manipulate you, Katja. I'm actually trying to help you. If you didn't care about Maksim, then I'd tell you to run and never look back. However, since you do, I'm advising you to save yourself the hell that he's going to bring to your doorstep until you can't take it anymore."

I started laughing until the laughter turned into tears.