Chapter 16

Samara~

S tanding half-naked in front of Avgust probably wasn't the best idea, but it seemed ridiculous to make a big deal out of it. After all, this was the same man that had taken all of my virginities, so feeling shy or insecure felt rather absurd at this point. Plus, it wasn't like I'd really had a choice. Had I not voluntarily removed my clothing, so that he could inspect my injuries, then he would have just torn them off me, something that I knew well.

Without a word, Avgust walked further into the bathroom, and his hazel gaze missed nothing as it raked over my body. I knew that my injuries were going to look worse in the morning, and I also knew that I was going to wake up sore as hell, but it wasn't like I wasn't going to wake up like that anyway. After all, I couldn't imagine that sleeping on a concrete floor would be comfortable for anyone.

"I told you it wasn't that bad," I muttered, not sure what I was feeling at the moment.

Avgust shot me a look that clearly disagreed. "I'm going to ask you something, Samara," he said, instead of calling me a liar. "I'm going to ask you something, and I need you to be completely honest with me. Understood?"

I nodded. "What?"

"Were you touched anywhere that I cannot see?" he asked, and it didn't take a genius to figure out what he was talking about.

"Not while I was conscious," I answered honestly. "I…I was fighting so hard that he was more worried about subduing me than…than anything else."

Avgust cocked his head a bit, almost as if he was trying to decide to believe me or not. However, finally, he asked, "Do you need help in the shower?"

"No," I rushed out, not daring to invite this man inside with me. I had no idea what awaited me in the shower, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was a mental breakdown.

To my surprise, Avgust gave me a terse nod before saying, "I will get you something to wear, and then I will see to your injuries."

As Avgust turned to leave, I blurted, "And then what?"

He stopped to look back at me, arching a brow. "I'm sorry?"

"What happens after I've showered?" I asked. "What happens after you've tended to my wounds?" His chin went up in a way that was too familiar to me. In fact, everything about Avgust Kotov felt like a trip back in time. "Is the key to the cage still going to be available to whoever wants to use it?"

Avgust's jaw ticked as he slid his hands in his pockets, and I hated that I could still feel something for him after all these years. If it was true that real love never died, then I was destined to probably love him for the rest of my life, and that really fucking sucked.

"You will be sleeping here," he informed me, surprising me a bit. "You will not be going back to the research facility."

At first, my heart swelled with that information, but when it occurred to me that he probably just didn't want to send me back with no clothes, those feelings of gratitude vanished. Whatever Avgust's plans were, me freezing to death in that cage was probably not on the list. He'd made it clear that he wanted me to suffer while I was his captive, and me dying too soon would be no fun; he'd said so himself.

"Is there anything else you need?" he asked evenly.

I shook my head. "No."

Avgust's hazel eyes narrowed a bit, and I stepped back as he walked over to the sink. I didn't say anything as I watched him open up one of the bottom drawers, and after fishing around for a few seconds, he placed a new toothbrush, a new stick of deodorant, and a brush on the counter. While I was grateful for the consideration, one thing hit me hard.

"That's men's deodorant," I said. "I'm going to smell like you."

That chin of his went up again. "Well, since everything in the shower is mine, you're going to end up smelling like me with or without the deodorant, Samara."

Yeah, I felt stupid.

"However, if it's any consolation, I've ordered your stuff to be packed, then delivered here in the morning," he went on. "You'll have your things soon enough."

"Why?" I asked. "I mean, I understand a change of clothes, but what do I need with the rest of it? No one at the research facility is going to care, Avgust."

Instead of answering me, he said, "Go take your shower, Samara. Now."

With that, Avgust turned, then walked out of the bathroom, though he didn't close the door behind him. Granted, I didn't think that it made much of a difference, and I was too exhausted to try to figure out what he was thinking right now. I had no idea what time it was, but I'd been up since eight in the morning yesterday, and I was beginning to feel it.

Walking over towards the shower, I turned it on, setting the temperature just right, then I finally removed my bra and panties. I also removed my ponytail before stepping underneath the hot spray of water, and as I let it cascade down my body, I could feel the back of my eyes finally stinging with emotion. Now that I wasn't in a panic over Masha, the reality of my life was finally sinking in, and I didn't know if I was pissed or saddened.

This morning, when I'd woken up to start my day, I'd been content, happy even. Life had been predictable, normal, and not embroiled with the goddamn Russian Bratva. My biggest worry had been our car and making sure that we could afford the repairs. After that, my biggest concern had been making sure that Masha waited for me, so that we could walk home together.

Now, hours after my shift had ended, our lives had been threatened, I'd been taken as some half-ass collateral by the only man that I had ever loved, and I'd almost been raped by one of his men because I no longer had value in their eyes. The second that Avgust had placed me inside that cage, I had become inconsequential.

It also didn't matter what Avgust had promised me as far as my safety was concerned. Now that I knew where I was going to live and what I was going to be subjected to, who cared about my physical wellbeing? My sanity wasn't going to last long if I had to spend my days listening to people being tortured. Or worse, I'd become immune to their screams and pleas. It was very possible that I could lose my humanity along with my mind, and I couldn't even imagine how I'd ever be able to face my sister again if that happened.

As the hot water hit each scrape, pain vibrated through my body, keeping me awake. My ankle was the worst of it, but it wasn't so bad that I couldn't walk. The cuff had just scraped the skin raw, and it was going to need an antibiotic salve and bandage. The rest of me would scab up in time, leaving little reminders of how I'd been brutalized tonight. They were also going to be a reminder of just how helpless I was against what Avgust had to offer. If his men wanted to rape me, I wasn't delusional enough to believe that I could stop them after what I'd just experienced.

The tears finally started pouring, but I still didn't know what they were from. I was feeling so damn much that I couldn't identify any of it. I wasn't even sure if this feeling would ever go away, either. I was going to worry about my sister and miss her every day, and I couldn't see that ever stopping. I also had no idea how long Avgust was going to keep me here, so what were the chances that I could still have a family after this?

Knowing that there was only one person that could answer those questions for me, I pushed aside the tears, then started washing myself, taking care with my injuries. I even washed my hair, knowing that this was probably going to be the last time that I'd have the luxury. When Avgust had begun pulling out toiletries for me, I'd been tempted to ask for a razor, but Avgust Kotov wasn't a stupid man, and only a stupid man would willingly hand me a weapon like that. Plus, once I was sent back into that cage, hair on my legs was going to be the least of my worries.

When I was finally done with my shower, I slid open the glass door, and Avgust was leaning up against the counter, a white shirt folded neatly next to him. As his hazel gaze raked my wet body from head to toe, it took everything that I had not to cover myself up like a virginal maiden, and I hated that he could make me squirm like that.

Nonetheless, with my head held high, I stepped out of the shower, then reached for one of the towels hanging on the bar, then wrapped it tightly around me, not bothering with my hair. After all, this wasn't my home, so I should not be walking around comfortably in it.

"Let's get your ankle wrapped up," Avgust finally said.

"Okay," I replied, resigned to just getting this night over with.

I didn't move as Avgust grabbed the white shirt, then made his way over to me. I also didn't say anything as he removed my towel, then begun drying me with it. He even dried my hair, and with each ministration, I felt rage eating at my insides. How dare he take care of me when he was the reason why all this had happened to me in the first place.

When he was finally done drying me, dressing me, and then bandaging my ankle, I'd never felt so enraged in all my life, and that was saying something.