Chapter 15

"You'll take care of her, and Noah, won't you? If things don't work out between us."

Lifting a hand to shield my eyes, I stare at the solid wall of muscle that is Matt. He's the only person who knows where I live, and he's made the trip here to check on Mandy. Smart enough not to linger at the house where my unmarked mate rests, we've moved to the cover of the trees not too far from the property.

Even though I could still hear her if she called, my skin crawls with the need to be closer to her. Leaving to meet her former alpha is going to be almost impossible.

"Of course, but why do you think it won"t? I mean, other than the fact that you're you." Matt stares at me, hard and knowing. "You can't even take your eyes off the house. It's okay to admit you have it bad. You're mates. It's normal."

Admitting it is not the problem. Convincing her that this was the only way is going to be the problem.

"Just promise. Lucian and Seth, too," I snap. Matt doesn't take my irritable tone personally, just nods. I roll my shoulders, feeling a little bit better knowing they'll be looked after. We were hardly best friends, but seeing as I really don't have any friends at all, he's it.

When Katya turned Matt in a moment of madness, I brought him here to learn control over his impulses. He picked it up a lot quicker than I did, but I put that down to having two mates providing him with a willing, plentiful supply of blood.

That, and not having a volatile wolf inside him.

I couldn't leave him to have the same horrendous experience after turning that I did, especially since he would never have come across Katya's radar if it weren't for me stalking the Steel pack. Whereas I was left to my own devices, doing things my shifter persona couldn't even imagine in my worst nightmares, Matt had some guidance to help him through.

"Mandy came here of her own accord. And she hasn't run screaming, yet. That's got to count for something?" he offers, being the positive, supportive guy he is.

Will I burst his bubble by explaining that I've basically trapped her here by scaring her with tales of dangerous vampires lurking in the forest?

She's hardly here completely willingly.

I don't, and, instead, I skirt around the details and play the tension in our home down.

"Just… we're different. She has Noah to think about it. It's not just her that she's making decisions for. And I might not be what she's looking for. I have to respect that."

I can't tell Matt about what's really going on. He's that guy: the one who will try to help no matter what you tell him. Whereas, the only thing I really need him to do is look out for Mandy and Noah if I can't.

"I'm a vampire who, until very recently, was human. Raiden is a witch. Max is a wolf-bear. Mates are mates are mates. There is no being too different."

Matt is a straight shooter. Maybe that's what I need right now.

"The blood thing… Did it freak Raider out? Or Max?" I hate myself for asking, but I need confirmation.

"You know it didn't."

His eyes burn at the mention of his mates and their first experience drinking blood. When Matt was freshly turned, he fed from Max, and it's safe to say they all enjoyed the experience. I remember dazed expressions and lust thick in the air.

"Just go with it. Life is short." Matt hesitates and looks at me properly for the first time. "I was going to say probably not for you, except you look like shit."

Gritting my teeth, I ball my hands into fists at my side. I'm quite aware that I look and feel awful. I wish people would stop telling me. "Imagine drinking blood from anyone other than your mates."

Matt grimaces, fake gagging at the thought, then understanding passes across his strong features. He can't bear the thought of tasting anyone else's blood. I might not be fully mated yet, but I feel the same. "Oh. OH. Fuck, man, how are you still standing?"

Assessing me from head to toe, I can see his mind racing, trying to work out how long it's been since I've had blood. When his jaw falls open, I know he appreciates the gravity of the situation.

"With great difficulty." Handing him a letter, I sigh. "Can you make sure Blake gets this? And if you're speaking to Max, tell him to stay on his toes."

Contained within the envelope is a piece of information that Mandy hasn't given me permission to share, but I need Blake to know so that he can act accordingly when the time comes. Matt nods, dragging a hand through his thick dark hair.

"You have to tell her how bad it is."

With a stiff shake of my head, I move toward the edge of the porch, making it clear this conversation is over.

"Is that why you won't even let me inside? Because you know I will?"

With a lethal stare, and a wave of my power pointed in his direction, I remind him just who is the alpha here. I might be weaker than normal, but I'm still far stronger than most.

"Do you want me to ask Raiden? She could, maybe, help…" I cut him up with a sharp shake of my head. I don't want some spell to make blood palatable.

I want my mate.

"I don't think it would be safe." I can't promise how my wolf might react to someone trying to put such a spell on us. It's better not to find out.

Matt's jaw clenches. He wants to help, but he knows I'm right. Raiden's pregnant and needs to be protected, no matter how powerful she is. I'm not even sure she can do the same kinds of magic safely when she's with child, like a female wolf shifter isn't supposed to shift until after she gives birth. It's not a chance I'm willing to take.

"Safe travels, Matt."

Matt pauses, thinking long and hard about what to do, but, ultimately, with a resigned shake of his head, he jogs down the steps, skirting around the edges of the lawn to the sheltered cover of the trees. "I hope it works out for you, Tyson. I really do." With one last look back at the house, he quirks one side of his mouth into a wry smile. "You're not as bad as you think you are. Tell the boys I said ‘Hi'."

He only adds that bit to make a point.

When Matt first realised I had two people living here, under my charge, he assumed I was turning them into my own personal warriors. Nothing could be further from the truth. I'd love for them to know nothing of the petty struggles between packs, the cruelty of some alphas, and the thinly veiled hatred between our species.

It's Matt who calls the beings that drift through this place my waifs and strays, but they're more than that: they're my friends, my pack. Because, like me, for their own reasons, they're living on the fringes, isolated and alone. And, as much as we pretend, for most of us, that's not a pleasant existence.

Blinking hard against the fatigue making it difficult to keep my eyes open, I watch until he's gone from view and shut the door. I rarely sleep before midnight. This evening, though, with Mandy still locked away in her room and stewing in her anger at me, and Seth and Lucian giving me a wide berth, it feels like now might be a good time to start. The next few days are going to be awful, and, without blood, I need to rest as much as I can.

If I'm going to die, I'd like to at least do it on a full night"s sleep this time.