Chapter 22

Vivian

"This is ridiculous." My voice echoes around the empty hallway in Q's home. The joy of being fitted for my wedding dress seems like so long ago, but it's been only two days. To say today was a disaster is putting it lightly.

One of the delivery drivers made an inappropriate reference to the broken relationship between me and Felix—while Felix was in the room. He then invited me out to the alley behind the shop where he said, and I quote: "I'll show you how your wedding night should have been."

Felix snapped and swung at him. The other guy ducked and sank his fist into Felix's face. Felix fought back with a ferocity I didn't think he had, until a final hit took him down.

I screamed, grabbed the closest weapon—a pizza pan—and threw it at the guy. For some reason, my aim was spot on. It hit him in the chest, and he crashed into a table, which collapsed under his weight. All the dough and the different toppings were thrown to the ground.

That's when the Head of Operations for the chain walked in. One look at the three of us and he fired Felix and me, while promising to report the issue to the delivery company.

Felix had, by then, staggered to his feet. Without another look at me, he took off.

I left with a sinking feeling in my stomach. I lost my job, my livelihood. I began to stress about how I was going to pay my bills. Only on my way home, when I checked the balance in my bank account, did I remember, I"m no longer broke.

After using some of the money Quentin transferred to pay for Lizzie's tuition and to cover the costs of my father's care, I have enough left over to not have to work for a long time.

Money worries have crowded my mind for so long, and now that they've faded, I can think clearly.

I don't have to go to a job I hate.

When I reach Q's place, the townhouse is empty.

Now, I shut the door, and the snick echoes around the empty hallway. I shake my head at myself in the hallway mirror.

"Ridiculous," I repeat.

It"s taken this incident and losing my job to open my eyes; to realize I don't have to go to work anymore. I didn't have to suffer through the indignity of what happened today. In fact, I don"t have to do anything I don't want to do. The sense of freedom makes me almost giddy.

I blow out a breath and roll my shoulders, trying to work out some of the knots.

The housekeeper, who comes in daily to clean up, must have left the lights on in the conservatory. I walk toward it, and when I glance outside, I see the hot tub on the deck. I admit, I've been tempted to use it before, but I opted not to. Mainly, because I've been on tenterhooks, wondering when I'll run into either Quentin or Felix, and that"s kept me confined to my room. Three nights of not seeing either of them—not even in the kitchen, has given me the courage.

Given the emotional upheaval of today, I've earned it, haven't I?

I head straight for the deck behind the conservatory and switch on the hot tub. The jets begin to gurgle and flow, with steam almost instantly rising up from the water. I return to my room, get changed into a swimsuit, slip on a robe, and grab a towel. En-route to the tub, I grab a bottle of red wine, open it, and with a glass, walk back onto the deck. Then, I slip off my robe and get into the tub.

Pouring myself a glass of wine, I take a sip, then lean back and sigh. Looking up, I see the full moon in the sky. It's too cloudy to make out stars, but the radiance of the moonlight makes up for it.

Slowly, my muscles unwind. I take another sip, then place the glass aside. I place the rolled-up towel under my neck at the lip of the tub, then stretch out. I am in that floating, half-drowsy state when I hear footsteps approach.

I crack open my eyelids to find Felix standing on the other side of the tub. He's wearing swimming trunks and his torso is bare. He also sports a black eye. "Felix, you're hurt," I sit up.

He shakes his head.

"I'm good, really."

"You don't look… good."

"Thanks." He half smiles. "Mind if I join you?" He jerks his chin in the direction of the jets.

I pop a shoulder.

"If you'd rather I leave—" He turns to go, and I almost let him.

But then I remember how he came to my defense when that delivery driver came onto me. And despite the fact the other guy was much bigger, Felix didn't hesitate to launch himself at him.

It makes me feel a little kinder toward him... Or maybe the hot tub and the wine have worked their magic and I"m feeling magnanimous enough not to castrate him right away. "Felix, it's fine. You can… join me," I call after him.

He pauses but doesn't turn around. He hangs his head. There's a defeated look to his posture. He looks so pathetick I begin to feel bad for him. Yes, he acted like an ass, but also, it can't be easy knowing I'm going to marry his father. And while a part of me feels he deserves the discomfort this causes him, he was my friend once. And he was there for me when I was struggling for money and to take care of my family.

"I could… do with the company," I throw out.

He nods, then turns and walks into the tub. He keeps to his end, which is so wide, that when he stretches out, there's plenty of space between our toes. For a few seconds, the only sound is the gurgling of the jets. Then he tips his head at the bottle of wine. "May I?"

I grab the bottle, top myself up, then lean over and hand it to him.

"Salut." He raises the bottle in my direction and takes a sip. "Fuck, this is good."

"It is."

"The old man has good taste; I'll give him that."

I look away, then back at him. "Why did you do it, Felix? Why did you not… decide the day before or the morning of the wedding? And to break it off with a text, not addressed to me… That was?—"

"—a horrible thing I did to you." He sits up straight. "I am so sorry, Viv. I truly am. I just… lost my nerve. I saw you before the ceremony, all dressed up in your bridal gown and I… I?—"

"Had second thoughts? Decided it wasn't right? Went into a moment of panic?"

Felix shifts around, his gaze ping-ponging everywhere, but at my face.

"It's okay, you can tell me. It's not going to make a difference now, anyway."

He nods and lowers his chin to his chest. "I realized I wasn't worthy of you… yet. That I couldn't give you everything you needed… yet. I… I knew I needed to get my life into shape first, before I could become worthy of you."

I blink slowly. That is not what I'd expected to hear.

"You could have, at least, had the courtesy to message me directly instead of through your best man."

Felix swallows. "I'm so sorry, I… That was cowardly of me. I should have told you face to face, but I… I couldn't stand the thought of disappointing you. But I'll make it up to you. I'm going to fight for you now."

"Excuse me?" I widen my gaze. "What do you mean fight for me?"

He begins to inch closer in the tub. "We… You and I had something, right?"

Wrong.What we had was friendship… if that. I felt the need to take care of him, the way I wanted to care for Lizzie or my father. I met Felix and saw the poor, lonely, lost boy that he was. I empathized with him and mistook it as the foundation on which to build something more.

When I stay silent, his features fall. He looks uncertain before he squares his shoulders. "We had something. I know we did. And I'm going to win you back. Just you watch."

"Felix, please, I—" I don't think there's a future for us. I'm attracted to your father. And much as I don't like things about him, the sexual tension between us is something I never had with you. It made me realize this is what I was missing out on. And whether I marry him or not… I know you and I are all wrong.

"No, don't say anything." He looks at me with that pleading look in his eyes, which is why I first noticed him. "Just tell me you'll give me a chance."

"But—"

"At least, promise me you'll think about it? I know I'm not my father… But I'm better than him."

"You are?"

"I'd never walk away from a child. I'd never put my career first. I'd never… be emotionally unavailable for my kids."

I flinch. It"s an unwelcome reminder of things I"ve been trying to avoid thinking about. Namely, my desire for children and what kind of father Q would be. But Q wants to make amends. He knows what he did to Felix was wrong. It's why he's trying to repair his relationship with his son. And something tells me Q won't screw up the second time around. If anything, he'll go out of his way to ensure he does things right.

Doesn't take away from the fact that Quentin hurt Felix. And now, he wants to hurt him further by marrying his son's ex. I shift around to find a more comfortable position. Q's, clearly, so overcome by emotion that he's not thinking straight.

He knows the effect it's going to have on Felix and he's going to do it anyway because… That's the connection he feels with you. That's how much he wants you. He also saw me as a convenient way to fulfill the conditions imposed by his father for him to consolidate his position as CEO. But he could marry anyone to fulfill his obligations, and it would be a lot easier than this whole situation. There are women who would kill for this opportunity, and he chose you.

Felix must see the doubts on my features, for he pushes his advantage. "One chance; that's all I ask."

"So you can stand me up at the altar again?"

He blushes. The red stands out against his pale skin and makes his black eye pop. The skin is more swollen than when I first saw him. I wince. That must hurt. He should put ice on it. I open my mouth to say so, then shut up. Why do I care about him when he's the one who left me stranded there at the altar? He did you a favor. If he hadn't had the balls to bail when he did, you'd be married to him and already regretting it.

I blow out a heavy sigh. It's only human to help someone in need. Also, it's clear nothing I say is going to shake him from his conviction that he has to try to win me back. The more I tell him it'd be a fruitless exercise, the more he's going to dig in his heels and become adamant about his intentions. So instead, I rise to my feet. "You need to ice that eye." I step out of the tub.

"Where are you going?"

"To get you a pack of frozen peas." I use my towel to dry myself off quickly, then shrug into my robe. I walk back through the conservatory and into the kitchen, pull the door to the freezer open, then grab what I need. I straighten, shut the door, then yelp. Standing there, scowling at me, is my soon-to-be husband.