41. Forty-One

Duty.

That was what held me back. I had every opportunity to kill the soldiers who captured us. They were not as trained or skilled as I was, but I held back.

They followed orders, upheld their duty to our Queen, and were innocent. I spared them because of that.

I was a coward.

Seeing Damian again, hearing him speak, and then Atreyis taunting him, he figured it out quickly, as I assumed he would. But why couldn’t I fight harder? Why didn’t I cross that line?

Because I am weak.So weak that I couldn’t protect the man I love.

And now, Atreyis was a prisoner.

We were placed in a holding cell under Damian’s home. It wasn’t surprising that he didn’t immediately bring me to Queen Verali. His lie about interrogation would fool his men, but I knew the truth. He wanted to remind me.

Sucking in a breath, I absently fingered the hole in my shirt and closed my eyes. Atreyis was chained and mounted to the wall opposite me. Another form of torture, I suppose, keeping me just outside reach from him. I wanted to wake him up. I wanted to prepare him, but I couldn’t.

It was better if he was unconscious. I didn’t want him to see this.

He was so brave on that cliff. He didn’t hesitate to come for me for a moment, knowing that the odds were against us. At least the tether was removed. The one Damian always carried was modified. It didn’t seek out the first Vampyr like the others. It sought out who he chose. The purse it was kept in was enchanted, keeping it bound inside until he needed it.

I wasn’t sure how long he’d keep us there, but it couldn’t be much longer.

“Fuck,” Atreyis groaned, startling me to fling open my eyes. He jerked against his shackles; the chain banged against the stone wall.

I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came forth. What would I say to him?

I’m sorry, I’m a coward. Sorry that I am weak. I couldn’t stomach killing innocent soldiers, but when I lost my mind, it didn”t matter.

“How do you still look so good after all that?” he said through a weak smile.

Balling my fists tight, I glanced at them and the shackles around my wrists. My arms weren’t bound to the wall like his, but I was chained nonetheless. “You should have run.” Pathetic. That is all you can say?

“It”s been a long time since someone ripped off a limb.” He deflected and examined our cell.

“Why didn’t you run!” I snapped.

He cocked his brow high. “Why would I? I told you. I would do anything to save you.” He said it so simply. So matter of fact.

“I could have killed them. I should have killed them. But…”

“Don’t you worry that pretty face. I’ll kill them so you don’t have to.” He grinned.

How was he able to hold onto that nonchalance? “You’re chained to a bloody wall in the domain of a Vampyr who will use every tool in his arsenal against you.”

He weathered his lip. “True, but they gotta let me go sometime, right?”

I sagged against the wall. Defeat claimed me. I was a fool to think I could outrun my fate. Fate always finds you. “When the opportunity comes, I want you to leave this place, Atreyis.”

“No.” He hardened his stare, his chest rising and falling through heavy breaths.

I took in his face. Not a blemish or scrape was present. His jacket was torn, missing a sleeve, and his pants were caked with mud. His hair curled more wildly, and flaking dirt coated his beard. But it was his eyes that burned. Atreyis was determined. He had an iron will. Nothing I said would stop him from doing what he wanted. I wished there was something he would listen to, though.

“What kind of man would I be if I left the man who loves me? Just left. Nothing, and no one is waiting for me out there. You are here. You are important. And I only leave this place if you’re with me. Period. End of discussion.” He nodded curtly.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered.

“You know what would really help us, though?” he mused. His eyes lit up with expectation.

“I can’t.”

“Why not? Will this fucking place out of existence unlock that delicious beast, and we can get the hell out of here!”

“Atreyis, it isn’t that simple. It won”t be a switch if I continue to use my power. It will be permanent.”

He frowned. “What a shit catch. Who gives someone god powers only to make it virtually impossible to use them?”

I shrugged, then I was drawn away from him to the footsteps coming down the shallow stairs. Tensing, all I wanted was to slink further away from the cell door, to cower in the shadows, but I remained firm. The closer they got, the more I felt my strength waver. Would I be able to overpower the fear in my chest? I didn”t know what was worse, losing myself to the frenzy or Damian.

Like clockwork, the images started flashing before my eyes, and the words burned my ears as if being spoken all over again.

I tried to fight back the memory, but it came anyway.

He waited until after the Queen publicly claimed me.

He waited until the tether weakened me and could barely stand before ushering me out of the great hall.

I knew he was upset when I voiced our love to the court. When I begged him to stop this—to stand up for us, but he didn’t seem angry now. His arm held me to his side, guiding me away from my coven.

We walked silently through the halls, but he stroked my side tenderly. We both knew that this day would come ever since Phillipe told my father about the incident with the raider camp. But Damian had been my constant, my strength.

That strength was crushed now. Now that I had no choice but to bed the Queen.

Swiping the remaining tears from my cheeks, embarrassment, and guilt washed over me. In my desperation, I exposed Damian. He’d been clear from the start—do not speak a word of our affair. It wasn’t forbidden for two men to love each other, but in our society, with all the infertility, it was frowned upon deeply.

A waste,my father would say.

We weren’t supposed to feed into lust when wombs could be filled. This wasn’t lust, it was love, and he never understood the difference. Neither did Damian’s coven. But Damian”s coven had no idea, unlike my father, who always suspected my preferences, not until today.

“Forgive me,” I told him as we bounded another corner into an even farther away hall. He remained quiet. “I can’t do it, Damian. It will destroy me.”

He took a harsh breath and pressed us forward. For a moment, I thought he was taking me to the courtyard, where we’d mount our horses, and he’d take me home. But we didn’t go to the courtyard. He led me to the servant’s quarters, through the bowels of the kitchen, into the room where laundry was washed. Steam rose from the dozen hazy pools as few servants meandered about.

Maybe he wanted to speak somewhere privately.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

Still, nothing.

It wasn’t until we went through yet another doorway and realized we were heading down into the cellar that I got worried—not about what he would say to me, but about what he might do. Damian was a violent Vampyr. I’d seen his wrath numerous times, and as commander of the military, he took personal pleasure in interrogating prisoners. But I wasn’t his prisoner. I wasn’t the enemy.

“Damian!” I barked, jerking from his hold when he nudged the door shut.

I backed into the wall of dusty ale barrels. He casually dug around in his pocket as if he had all the time in the world. “Can we discuss this? Please? I know I made a mistake!”

His eyes flashed to mine. “Turn around.” His voice was cold, void of all the love I yearned for.

“No, we need to—”

“TURN AROUND!” He shoved me back, cracking the ale; the contents spilled over the stone at our feet.

Pulling out what he held in his pocket, my gaze dropped on the enchanted leather pouch. I had been tethered for the better part of three hours! I couldn’t do it again, and I couldn’t bear it.

Feeling all of my willpower vanish, I turned around.

He pressed up against me hard. “What was the one rule? Hmm?” he whispered, his cold breath against my ear.

“We are to remain in the shadows.”

“Yet you broke it. Spilled my secret to the entire court!” His knee flung up between my legs. Bellowing, I folded over. “Stand up!” He yanked my hair, forcing me upright, shoving the side of my face into a barrel.

“Damian,” I tried to move away from the stench of ale, but he slammed my head. My nose cracked against the wood, splinters biting into my cheeks. I gagged as the ale splashed into my mouth.

“If you move, I will tether you,” he warned.

Steeling myself, I closed my lips and eyes. He dropped his hand from my hair to the waist of my pants, leaning against my back even firmer now. What was he going to do? Threaten me into submission? The truth was out! Everyone knew now there was no taking it back! He jerked my pants open, his fingers curled around my limp cock.

“I fight this every day. Every fucking day I fight this urge. I’ve done my duty. I’ve upheld my honor. But you?” He squeezed, sending white-hot pain through my groin up into my stomach. “You couldn’t buckle down and fuck one woman.”

“Stop this, Damian,” I begged, my eyes slammed so tight they burned.

“Since when have you given me orders? Commands? You will obey me.” He released me and pulled my pants down, baring my rear.

Whatever he was planning, I wouldn’t go along with it. Pushing away from the destroyed barrels, I swung my head back, smacking his. He snarled, digging his nails into my hip and biting my throat. I rammed an elbow into him. Damian had always been slightly quicker than me, so he got the upper hand momentarily, spinning me and shredding the flesh with his bite. I brought my knee up, slamming it into his cock, and flashed for the door.

It wasn’t until I pulled it open that I realized I was still exposed. Stopping for that split moment to hoist up my pants was a mistake.

Electric pain shot up my leg. The air fled from my lungs, and I fell to my knees. He was on me a moment later, dragging me back into the cellar and slamming the door closed with his foot. Lifting me to a different, barren wall, he wedged his forearm to the back of my neck and tore my pants off in one tug. The fabric shredded and landed with a soft plop somewhere.

He grunted, the button of his pants unfastening, but I couldn’t utter a syllable in protest. The tether drained me so fast. “You will do what is required.” He nudged my legs apart with his knee.

Tears fell from my eyes as I swung my lifeless arms, anything to get him off me. “You will fuck the Queen and still come to my chambers.” He thrust into me.

I screamed. The entry was the equivalent of a blade. White clouded my vision, and for a moment, I thought I’d lose consciousness. It was too much. My insides were being pulverized, torn, and used in a way that I couldn’t fathom would hurt as bad as it did then.

He grunted, heavy and loud in my ear. “You will obey me, Vastian. What I tell you is what you do.” He increased his pace. The sound of flesh hitting flesh curdled the bile in my stomach, and at any moment, I was sure to vomit everywhere.

“Say you will obey me,” he gripped my waist while the other was still firm around my neck.

When I didn’t answer, he moved harder and faster—determined to break me and show me just what he was capable of. “SAY IT!” he screamed.

My shoulders jerked, and my throat clenched, but I refused. He pulled out of me. And for those few seconds, I thought he’d conceded. But then he did it again. “You will fucking obey me. Say it, or I swear by all the gods I will disembowel you.”

I hated that I whimpered like a beat dog. I hated that I cried like I did—that I was weak, helpless, and unable to stop his brutality. Just say it, obey him, and it’ll stop. My mind had a point, but I”d never be free if I did cave in. I’d be not only a slave to the Queen but to Damian, too. He said he loved me and that he cared for me.

“Say it!”

“I will obey you,” I whined. Unable to convey all the proper syllables.

“Louder!”

“I will obey you!”

With the final thrust, I couldn’t tell if it was blood or his cum, but he pulled out, and a puddle formed under me. Just as I was about to fall to the floor, he ran his hand up and down my spine.

“Clean yourself up. I expect to see you tonight.”