Chapter 4

4

"Iwasnae thinking," Lana sobbed, squeezing her pillow to her chest as Ciara stroked her blonde curls. "I've ruined everything. I'm so daft."

"Daenae say that," Olivia said, squeezing Lana's hand comfortingly. "Ye're one of the smartest people I ken."

The three women were in Lana's chambers, where she had thrown herself on her bed to cry. She was finally releasing all the heartbreak she had felt since watching Laird MacCrawford walk away from her, intent on marriage.

"I can speak with Alexander," Ciara, her older sister, offered. "Perhaps he will find a reason to deny his request."

"Ye dinnae see his face!" Lana cried. "This wedding is everything Alexander has hoped for. And I cannae deny this man without bringing shame to Clan Gunn."

The last hour of the wedding, after Daniel left without a second glance, had been torture for Lana, filled with forced smiles and stilted pleasantries. As she stood next to Alexander in the entryway to see the final guests out, he kept smiling over at her, full of pride.

Her brother was nearly bursting at the seams in excitement over her potential betrothal. Meanwhile, Lana had forced herself not to cry. Anytime she imagined Laird MacCrawford's face, with that imposing eyepatch covering the left side, she had to swallow past the lump that formed in her throat. She was glad most of the guests were drunk as they stumbled out the doors because they wouldn't be suspicious of the tears that pooled in her eyes.

"Tell us again what happened," Ciara cooed as Lana's sobs turned into hiccupping gasps. "Maybe it's nae as bad as ye think."

Lana sat up in bed and pulled herself up to lean against the headboard. She took in the comforting expression of her older sister and the eager hopefulness of Olivia, her sister-in-law and close friend.

"I daenae ken where to start," she croaked. Her nose was runny, and she sniffed before accepting a handkerchief from Ciara.

"Wherever ye like," Ciara offered gently.

"I was having such a good time," Lana began, before another sob escaped her lips. She took a deep breath and started again. "I was dancing. Well, we were all dancing."

She could still see the smiling faces of Ciara and Olivia on the dance floor with her. She could still feel the lightness in her feet and the laughter that made her stomach hurt as they enjoyed themselves.

"But then ye went to check on the children," Lana continued, "and all at once, there was a man at me elbow who told me Alexander had sent him to speak with me."

"I should have stayed with ye," Olivia sighed. She wrapped an arm around Lana's shoulders and pulled her in for a hug. "I'm sorry."

"It wasnae yer fault." Lana sniffed.

Olivia and Ciara were both married with three children between them. They were doting mothers, and it was always their custom to check on the children at least once during parties or celebrations of this kind.

"Was he awful?" Ciara asked. "We all ken Alexander is smart, but we have to admit his taste in men is often questionable."

"He was drunk," Lana said. She hated that she could so easily picture Laird Cullen's face. "He kept pulling me toward the dance floor, urging me to dance with him. I told him I was tired and begged his forgiveness. I dinnae wish to make him angry, but I dinnae like the way he was pulling at me. I tried to find someone nearby, perhaps a third person who could join the conversation, but all of a sudden, it felt like I was in a room full of strangers."

Ciara brought her hand back to Lana's hair and ran her fingers through it, a gesture she had made since Lana was a child. It always brought Lana comfort, but tonight it wasn't enough to ease the panic that ripped through her every time she tried to think about what had happened tonight.

"I just wanted to get away. I was starting to panic. I daenae ken why, I just felt that I needed to get out of there. I excused meself, but he was suddenly speaking about marriage and how I would love being the lady of his castle. And I just panicked. I told him I already had a betrothed, and when he asked me who it was, I found the scariest-looking man in the room. And then I pointed at him."

"Can ye tell me exactly why ye needed to rush out of there?" Cameron asked, riding alongside Daniel on horseback. "Ye ken ye pulled me away from a very lovely woman, right?"

Daniel simply snorted, knowing very well what he had pulled Cameron away from when he insisted it was time to leave. But he wasn't in the mood for any explanations. He simply wanted to get home and come to terms with exactly what he had set in motion tonight.

"Perhaps if ye had stayed in the main hall, ye would ken why I needed to leave," Daniel scoffed.

It was too dark for him to feel comfortable traveling— his eye kept darting around the treeline and ahead of them. The lanterns they held cast shallow beams of light, and Daniel was on edge, worrying about an ambush. He had intended to leave earlier, but a curvy lass had derailed his plans.

"So, something did happen?" Cameron asked. "I heard whisperings about some crazy man who threatened to cut someone's hand off."

He laughed, and it was clear to Daniel that his brother thought this was some wild story. Perhaps a simple incident had been blown up until it was an outrageous event that he thought would never happen.

It was only Daniel's silence that seemed to tell Cameron that it wasn't so outlandish, after all.

"Wait, ye tried to cut someone's hand off?" Cameron asked, swinging his lantern so the light illuminated Daniel's face.

Daniel squinted at the change of lighting. "I dinnae try," he clarified. "If I wanted to do it, I would have succeeded. But it's nae kind to shed blood at someone else's wedding."

"And ye thought I was up to mischief!" Cameron laughed. "What did ye do?"

"It's none of yer concern," Daniel said, forcing his gaze ahead.

He wanted nothing more than to walk back home in silence, and yet he knew his brother wouldn't let up until he had more information. Sure enough, Cameron pushed him.

"The first party ye go to in years, and ye find yerself the center of attention. Let me guess, ye got yerself banned from Gunn Castle."

"Nay," Daniel uttered. "Not banned."

"Then what?" Cameron asked, his tone more insistent with each question. "Tell me what happened."

Daniel knew he wouldn't have peace on this ride until he told his brother the truth. He sighed and squared his shoulders, as if steeling himself for the response.

"I got meself a wife."

"I told Laird Cullen me betrothed was sitting over there. I rushed over and told him I would give him whatever he wanted if only he would play along. See? I am daft. I shouldnae have made such a promise."

"But how could ye ken he would force ye to marry him?" Ciara asked gently.

"Why him?" Olivia added, ever curious. "Of all the men in the room, why did ye choose Laird MacCrawford?"

"I daenae ken," Lana said. It was something she had been asking herself all night. "I just thought if I picked the scariest man in the room, then the old man would be too afraid to question me."

"He's certainly scary," Ciara agreed, and Lana didn't miss the hint of worry in her voice. "Magnus says he's a cruel man. There's a coldness in him ever since his wife was murdered. He's spent years fighting against neighboring clans, perpetuating the bloodshed."

"Ciara," Olivia hissed.

Lana knew her friend was trying to protect her, but she was suddenly alert, surprised by the mention of Daniel's wife and, even more shocking, her murder.

"It's alright," Lana said. "I need to ken. I want to ken what I need to prepare meself for."

Lana felt wrung out from all the crying, as if there was nothing left inside of her. It was an exhausting, empty feeling, but she knew she couldn't simply curl up and ignore the problem in front of her. If she was going to live with this man, then she needed to learn whatever she could about him.

She nodded at her sister, urging her to continue.

Ciara considered her request for a moment, maybe wondering if her little sister could handle it, but then she continued.

"He started a war to avenge his wife's death. Or, at least, that's what some people say. Others say the man is simply blood-thirsty, more at home on the battlefield than anywhere else. But then, after winning all those battles, he locked himself away in his castle."

"For how long?" Olivia asked, clearly wrapped up in the story.

"It's been three years," Ciara explained. "He never bothered to form alliances with other clans, and nay one dared to go to him. They were too afraid of him. This ceilidh is the first time most people have set eyes on him in years."

"I really did pick the scariest man in the room," Lana groaned. "Serves that old drunkard right."

"He might be the scariest, but he's also the most handsome." Olivia winked at her. "Nay one would argue ye picked one of the best-looking men at the weddin'. Could it nae be worse?"

"Nay!" Lana cried, feeling tears fill her eyes once more. The guilt she had battled all night was bubbling up to the surface again, and she reached out to grab Ciara's hands. "It couldnae be worse because it doesnae only hurt me. I've betrayed Ciara."

Tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked into her sister's face.

"I'm sorry for letting yer sacrifice go to waste," she sobbed, and she lunged forward to pull her sister into a hug. Ciara's hand came to her back, gently rubbing between her shoulder blades.

"What are ye speaking of, Lana?" Ciara asked, her voice calm and soothing. "What sacrifice?"

"Ye kenned how much I wanted to marry for love," Lana mumbled into her shoulder. "All those years ago, ye sacrificed yerself and married Magnus so that I could find me true love. And now all of that is gone. Yer sacrifice was for naught."

"It wasnae a sacrifice," Ciara insisted, rubbing her sister's back. "Ye ken I love Magnus more than anything. Take comfort in our story. Love can blossom in a marriage of convenience."

"We're both living examples of that," Olivia added. "It doesnae have to start with love. Ye can grow into it, and it doesnae make the match any less strong."

"But it's nae what I imagined," Lana insisted. "I've dreamed of me wedding for so long, and I've never dreamed of a cruel, blood-thirsty laird standing across from me as I take me vows."

She fell back into her sister's arms and allowed Ciara to pull her close. Another hand touched her shoulder, likely Olivia's.

"Ye never ken who will be a good match," Olivia told her. "Yer brother can be scary too, but we're happy together. Happier every day."

"And he protected ye, Lana," Ciara reminded her. "That has to mean something. He couldnae bear to see that man treat ye badly. Maybe he'll be a good match for ye, after all."